beefwellington



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  1. Rec *

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    Immediately post-theatre: Nandor shoves his foot into his mouth, and Guillermo finally gets some things off of his chest. 

    Over and over until it sticks.

     

    Started as a oneshot, turned into a time loop fic.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    21,824
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Comments:
    95
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    681
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    126
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    27 Jan 2022

  2. Rec *

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    Five times Guillermo is injured in front of Nandor.

    Or, five times that Nandor is reminded of the fragility of humans.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    38,260
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Collections:
    3
    Comments:
    256
    Kudos:
    3,261
    Bookmarks:
    626
    Hits:
    44,506

    17 Jan 2022

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    When Nandor wakes in the evening coughing up blood and rose petals, he is forced to call out sick from his Vampiric Council duties, and the household is set aflutter with confusion--vampires don't get sick. Nandor needs to find out what's wrong. But how can Nandor investigate when his faithful bodyguard is so determined to make him rest?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,020
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    60
    Kudos:
    1,172
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    157
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    6,569

    08 Jan 2022

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “It’s not even 11pm.” Guillermo crosses his arms. “I’m going to McDonald’s.”

    Nandor raises an eyebrow. “To eat?”

    “No, to do pilates,” Guillermo snarks. “Yes, to eat. You know, that silly thing humans have to do. Which I am, by the way. Still human! In case you had forgotten.”

    “Stop with this,” Nandor grumbles. And then, “Okay. I will come with you to the McDonald’s. I will get my going-out cloak.”

    Guillermo stares at Nandor, who is already turning to walk away. He stammers, “But… why?”

    Nandor whirls back around dramatically. “You are the one who wanted to ‘hang out’,” he snaps. “So stop with this questioning.” And then he’s off, stomping up the stairs in an unwarranted hurry.
     

    Or: Guillermo and Nandor try to navigate their "friendship" now that Guillermo is a cool vampire murderer. It's super.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,343
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    108
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    2,577
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    515
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    18,292

    04 Jan 2022

  5. Public Bookmark 83

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    “You’re never going to be anything else, Greg. Greg the egg. Cousin Greg, the tall drink of fish out of water”

    “Uh, I don’t think—I—is that how it goes?”

    This is the second time Tom’s walked into his apartment—does he have a key? How the fuck does he have a key? Did Kendall give it to him?—and the Greg’s-lost-count time Tom’s insulted him unprovoked. Before that, though, Tom had stormed to the fridge and downed half a beer in one furious, choking series of gulps.
    post-s2

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,747
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    35
    Kudos:
    529
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    83
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    7,470

    28 Oct 2021