The_Doodle_Bug
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Lessons in Flirting (Unintentionally and Definitely Not Romantically) by shrimprangoon
Fandoms: 9-1-1 (TV)
14 Sep 2025
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Summary
Hen sighs. “Something had to be said before you idiots put us in mortal peril.”
“I’d never do anything to jeopardize our safety on a job! You know that Hen.”
“Maybe not on purpose,” Chim chimes in, “but, see, the thing is, when you flirt with our Buck, his brain turns off. He just bluescreens.”
“You’re flustering the poor boy, Eddie,” Hen adds. “And it’s making him dumb.”
“-er,” Chim adds.
“Wha- Buck isn’t flustered.”
Eddie is flustered. His face feels hot. He takes another sip of his coffee to give his hands something do to, but that only makes him feel warmer. Shit.
Hen levels him with the most deadpan look. “Last week he walked into a stop sign after you called him ‘big boy’ on a call.”
Eddie nearly spits out his coffee.
Or: the one where Eddie subconsciously flirts with Buck without realizing and Buck is actively trying not to have a heart attack at work about it
Series
- Part 1 of Lessons in Dumbassery
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 45,342
- Chapters:
- 8/8
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- 395
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Bookmarked by The_Doodle_Bug
04 Jun 2026
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Summary
“Someone referred to me as your wife the other day.” Buck started.
Eddie choked on air. His cheeks were so pink. Why did he blush like that? Buck was paler than him, and yet somehow he didn’t blush anywhere near as hard as Eddie himself did.
“Do you think of me as your old ball and chain?” Eddie asked, going along with the joke despite the frankly upsetting colour of his cheeks. How was this Buck looking in love with him? Obviously they were comfortable with each other, but still.
Buck gasped, his eyes big, his back straightening out as he got ready to fight with God himself on this topic. Eddie knew immediately the rant he had started, Buck’s mockingly serious voice raising as he stared Eddie down intently.
“I would never refer to my wife as the old ball and chain. You don’t hold me down, you pick me up, you dirty little bitch. You’re the wind beneath my wings. God.”
OR -
Buddie as The Basement Yard boys.
Series
- Part 1 of Buddie as the Basement Yard
- Language:
- English
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- 18,431
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- 1/1
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- 4,999
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Bookmarked by The_Doodle_Bug
04 Jun 2026
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Summary
Eddie Diaz and Shannon Diaz
@16:24
Eddie: You didn't tell me Buck is with you??
Shannon: I didn't🤐
Eddie: ...is there a reason for that?
Shannon: Yeah. We're fucking, so I thought it might get a bit awkward x
Eddie: WHAT
Eddie: Shan you're joking
Eddie: I'm coming back in there
Shannon: You're half pulled out of the driveway??
Shannon: Eddie
Shannon: Eddie go away, I was joking🤦♀️
Bookmarked by The_Doodle_Bug
04 Jun 2026
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Summary
"A now-familiar rage boils up in Eddie's chest, and he shakes out his limbs, baring his teeth in relief when they call his name again.
He'd been slated for three fights tonight, and this is his last one. Sweat is rolling down his back, and his body is probably going to ache in the morning, but he can't feel any of it yet because of the adrenaline.
Not only as he already fought twice tonight, he'd also won both matches, and he doesn't feel like stopping. His limbs are still loose, there's energy still sparking through his veins, and the fury that he's been trying to expel all night is still firmly settled behind his breastbone, tendrils winding up his throat as if to choke him.
He almost feels bad for whoever he's about to climb into the ring with."
Or, one night sets Eddie on a whole new path.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 64,407
- Chapters:
- 12/12
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- 1
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- 637
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Bookmarked by The_Doodle_Bug
04 Jun 2026
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Summary
“You think he took something?” Eddie asked, distracted.
His focus was fixed on the way Buck’s other hand had come up to his face, fingertips trailing softly along his cheekbone, worshipful and unfiltered.
“Pretty,” Buck whispered. “So pretty. Like… like a doll. Or…no. Not a doll. They can be creepy.”
Bookmarked by The_Doodle_Bug
04 Jun 2026