1 - 20 of 8484 Works in Crack Treated Seriously

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  1. Tags
    Summary

    Shen Qingqiu and Shang Qinghua accidentally invented dimension travelling.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,499
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    22
    Kudos:
    83
    Bookmarks:
    14
    Hits:
    585
  2. Tags
    Summary

    Rook has no friends and no acquaintances in Hope County. She has just arrived to become a Deputy a few days before they were sent to arrest Joseph Seed.

    So things start a bit differently and everything goes off the rails soon enough.

    (AKA a sarcastic, sneaky sniper joins a cult and falls in love. Eventually. It might take some time if someone has the emotional intelligence of a brick on most days.)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    138,987
    Chapters:
    13/15
    Comments:
    73
    Kudos:
    329
    Bookmarks:
    79
    Hits:
    4766
  3. Tags
    Summary

    Harry Potter decides to give Tom Riddle a second chance at King's Cross Station by deciding to pass into the afterlife. A soul for a soul; the Horcrux that had been bonded to his scar is allowed to return in his place. Tom Riddle wakes up in a clearing in the Forbidden Forest—in Harry Potter's body. A lot of further shocking revelations occur after that.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    22,532
    Chapters:
    5/?
    Comments:
    35
    Kudos:
    57
    Bookmarks:
    13
    Hits:
    526
  4. Tags
    Summary

    “Say something, man. Why are you here? What do you want?”
    “I don't know,” Hermann whispers, barely audible above the sound of blood rushing in his ears. He never wants to see Newton again. He wants to shove him against the wall and smash his mouth against those unreasonably pink lips. He wants to slap him across the face and leave, he wants to stay, stay, stay. He wants to scream.
    He does none of these things.

    When Newton reaches out to Hermann three years after the Breach was closed, Hermann is eager yet wary to reunite. But Newton is changed by his continued drifting with the alien hivemind, and hunted by the press.

    Will they ever get a moment alone?

    [A Notting Hill-inspired AU. I have nothing to say for myself.][Content warning: MIND-FUCKING ALIENS, drug and alcohol abuse, and toxic relationship dynamics]

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,824
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    9
    Kudos:
    14
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    94
  5. Tags
    Summary

    Kakashi and Zabuza get hitched via ancient clan traditions. It's probably about time for the Sandaime to start stockpiling sake.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    93,892
    Chapters:
    22/?
    Comments:
    911
    Kudos:
    3424
    Bookmarks:
    519
    Hits:
    48792
  6. Tags
    Summary

    When Will wakes up with the ears and tail of a mongoose, who better to tell than his friend Hannibal Lecter? After establishing that he isn't hallucinating, Will figures out that his friend may not be as trustworthy as he thought. Now held hostage, Will needs to use his wits to escape- wait, what do you mean love?
    Aka Hannibal loves Will, and takes advantage of a strange situation.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,258
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    33
    Kudos:
    156
    Bookmarks:
    31
    Hits:
    1275
  7. Tags
    Summary

    They were locked away in a cold cell, in the middle of who-knows-where, with no hope of escape in sight. An old nightmare returns to haunt Edelgard, but this time she isn't the only one being experimented on. With each passing day and every prick of the needle, Claude was helpless as he watched his hopes and dream grow too far to reach. Dimitri had known he was a beast for years, but now it was becoming far too literal.

    At least they had each other.

    Note: Spoilers for all routes

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    25,248
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    59
    Kudos:
    170
    Bookmarks:
    34
    Hits:
    2324
  8. Tags
    Summary

    He did nothing wrong, we're just mean.

     

    The Promised Day was going well, up until the One The Homunculi Call Father made the choice to drag his sacrifices down with him. Scattered across an unfamiliar world and still nursing their injuries, the five attempt to find each other again. But the longer they stay the more entrenched they become in this world's problems.

    Oh, and what the hell are 'quirks?'

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,699
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    31
    Kudos:
    94
    Bookmarks:
    29
    Hits:
    787
  9. Tags
    Summary

    The sticky note Brienne finds in her bag when she sits down on the bus reads:

    "Just try it! You can read it behind one of your medical books to hide your shame. Or, we can read it aloud together when you get off work!"

    Tyrion writes romance novels under a pen name to spite Tywin. Brienne begrudgingly reads and enjoys them, thanks to Sansa's nagging. Jaime, away from Cersei for the first time in his life, figures his shit out. This includes moving in next door and trying to flirt with Brienne using scenes from Tyrion's bestseller, an erotic re-telling of Florian and Jonquil. Sansa assists, but her help isn't necessarily helpful.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    20,378
    Chapters:
    6/14
    Comments:
    227
    Kudos:
    273
    Bookmarks:
    42
    Hits:
    3707
  10. Tags
    Summary

    When Shinichi dies in the realest sense, he expects to stay dead. Granted, considering the fact he died as a cat showed that life wasn’t exactly going his way.

    (OR: Supernatural, Halloween spin-off of Curiosity Made the Cat.)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,980
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    13
    Kudos:
    32
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    200
  11. Tags
    Summary

    Seriously. Just don't.

    Karma Akabane, like all bored and curious little human children do once in their lives, tries to summon a demon.

    Or: Human Karma Akabane, demon Gakushuu Asano, and the happenings in an assassination classroom.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    21,363
    Chapters:
    14/?
    Comments:
    255
    Kudos:
    215
    Bookmarks:
    16
    Hits:
    2286
  12. Tags
    Summary

    MoD!Harry Potter, saving-people-thing intact, meets Tom Marvolo Riddle in the not-yet-Avengers’ New York a few decades after the wizarding war.

    Or, the one where Tom is tired of Harry’s terrible fashion sense (hint: rags), furniture is destroyed with great prejudice, and tomarry’s over-fluffed shenanigans with death eaters and Earth’s Mightiest Heroes can be pried from the author’s cold dead fingers. Also, plot.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    42,607
    Chapters:
    7/?
    Comments:
    131
    Kudos:
    374
    Bookmarks:
    105
    Hits:
    5209
  13. Tags
    Summary

    Okay, I’m gonna try and tell y'all this story right.

    I'm bipolar. What am I supposed to think when I wake up in a medical bay on the Supremacy, and everyone thinks I’m incredibly strong with the Force? Like, either I am in the self-insert fanfiction of my dreams, or I’m having the best manic episode I’ve ever had in my life.

    Yeah. It didn't really work out like that.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,870
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    1
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    43
  14. Tags
    Summary

    DICK: He's the one, I just know it. I feel it in my heart, Timmy.

    TIM: Dick, you've literally never seen him before in your entire life, you've never talked to him, you don't even know he was my brother!

    DICK: (gasps) HE'S your brother?! Timmy, you have to introduce us! I'll do anything, please, please, please?

    TIM: (groans loudly, spins lock on locker and opens it) You're hopeless, Dick. There's no point. You'll be over your infatuation in a couple weeks anyway. Remember Bobby Bosch?

    DICK: Who?

    TIM: Exactly.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,232
    Chapters:
    6/?
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    64
    Bookmarks:
    13
    Hits:
    1358
  15. Tags
    Summary

    Gloria isn't suited to any of this. Short character study/backstory.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    841
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Hits:
    0
  16. Tags
    Summary

    College drop-out Oswald Cobblepot is aimlessly and shamelessly doing nothing with his life besides trying to help his methodical best friend, Ed, finish school. This gives Oswald plenty of time to help Edward around campus, and to also run into Barbara and Ivy desperately searching for a singer for their band. Oswald seems like a perfect fit except for one thing: it's an all girl band. However, with a fast approaching gig, Barbara suggests using Oswald's effeminate nature as a quick fix solution.

    Edward, always the realist, has a bad feeling about the whole thing, but he wants to support his best and only friend. All of Ed's worries only get worse when Jim Gordon starts showing interest in Oswald's female persona.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    44,187
    Chapters:
    16/?
    Comments:
    33
    Kudos:
    165
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    1410
  17. Tags
    Summary

     
    In one universe, Tony Stark closed his eyes to a world where Superheroes were a rarity.

    In another universe, Tony Stark opens his eyes to a world where Superheroes are the norm.

     

    (An AU where after the events of Endgame, Tony Stark finds himself inhabiting the body of a young quirkless boy named Midoriya Izuku and figures out the world could use... another Iron Man)

     -------
    Basically, Izuku becomes Iron Man.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    15,429
    Chapters:
    5/?
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    271
    Kudos:
    1434
    Bookmarks:
    366
    Hits:
    17442
  18. Tags
    Summary

    Leaders have so much resting on their young shoulders.
    They bear the weight of the group, and the bridge between the managers and their members.

    So excuse them, when they say they don't need, want, or deserve this shit

    - - -

     

    By the way, this does contain headcanons, and lil drabbles that I didn’t think were long
    enough to post on its own.

    ---

    As of 10/13/19

     
    B.A.P - 4

    BTS - 16

    EXO - 26

    GOT7 - 20

    JBJ/95 - 1

    MONSTA X - 9

    NCT - 4

    NINE PERCENT/ 9% - 1

    Pentagon - 2

    STRAY KIDS - 11

     
    JOINT CHAPTERS - 2

    BTS & MX

    GOT7 & MX

    COMPANIES - 1 (SM & JYP)
     

     ———

    New schedule as of 1/3/19: I update on Monday and/or Friday! Whenever I update, it’ll always be two chapters. - Bes (Hopefully I stick to this bullshit)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,630
    Chapters:
    98/?
    Comments:
    256
    Kudos:
    333
    Bookmarks:
    26
    Hits:
    19012
  19. Tags
    Summary

    Peter B. pays to reserve a camping location after learning of the rare occasion that all the spider-kids' guardians will be gone for the weekend.

    6 spider-people go camping. Things are bound to get a little out of hand.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    18,975
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    13
    Kudos:
    52
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
    824
  20. Tags
    Summary

    The newly acquired appendages may be unusual and a bit of a nuisance but they’re part of Magnus.

    After a rocky beginning, Alec starts to appreciate them.

    _

    For the prompt: “Get those things away from me.”

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,010
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    7
    Kudos:
    65
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    585

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