CuntySp1es



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  1. Public Bookmark 6

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    Gordon Freeman wakes up with no memories on a spaceship in the middle of nowhere, alone except for three unhinged AIs who expect him to save the world. And just when he thinks things can't get any weirder, the alien shows up...

    (A HLVRAI PHM AU!)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,278
    Chapters:
    2/?
    Comments:
    14
    Kudos:
    24
    Bookmarks:
    6
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    03 Jul 2026

  2. Public Bookmark 11

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    “However the hell you got here—” Gordon waves the knife in a dizzy little circle around Benrey’s head. “Do that backwards.”

    “you want me to blink backwards?”

    “Blink?”

    “when your eyes close,” Benrey says. “fastly. like this.”

    He blinks. Gordon considers stabbing himself. That’d be a little more dignified. Die with intention instead of getting himself killed trying to put a hole through a hallucination. Or, worse, giving himself a halfway hackjob and living to explain it to the cavalry. Officer, there was an NPC in my kitchen.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,664
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    32
    Kudos:
    71
    Bookmarks:
    11
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    489

    03 Jul 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    “Proof of concept,” ♫♬♯♩♩♫ says. “We’ve tested it thoroughly to ensure it fits the specified nutritional profile, and several members of our team have ingested small amounts of it to ensure there were no adverse effects.”

    “You ate some of it?” I ask, rudely. I’m too irate to mind my language. Who do they think they are? That meat is for Grace. In a way, that meat is Grace.

    “Yes,” ♫♬♯♩♩♫ says. They and the rest of the human life support thrum know better than to be offended by my occasionally strange behaviour. “Obviously we weren’t going to risk the life of Honoured Grace on a completely untested technology.”

    That doesn’t mean much. There’s a lot of things that are safe for ingestion by Eridians that would outright kill a human.

    Trust Grace, I remind myself. He’ll have thought of all this.

    (OR: Grace's meburgers from the book epilogue. Let's talk about those!)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,877
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    197
    Kudos:
    2,326
    Bookmarks:
    536
    Hits:
    15,650

    02 Jul 2026

  4. Public Bookmark 3

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    Stain manages to get himself stuck in a wall. His teammates decide that if they can't free him, they can at least give him a good time.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,421
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    7
    Kudos:
    15
    Bookmarks:
    3
    Hits:
    381

    01 Jul 2026

  5. Public Bookmark 2

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    "Would you deny a dying man of water?"

    "You ain't a necessity, yer a disease!"

    "It's hard to tell the difference when he begs oh so desperately."

    "You lyin' piece of shit!"
    -----
    After being plagued with nightmares of The Gman using Gordon, Barney sees the man responsible and offers himself in place of his lost lover.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,768
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    7
    Kudos:
    17
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    160

    25 Jun 2026