Tonight is the night you take back your life
9-1-1 breakdown and suicidal thoughts/attempts collection. Proceed with caution and know your limits. No completed attempts in this collection.
On average, there were 17.6 veteran suicides per day.
988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline
(Open, Unmoderated)
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Buck weaves his way into Eddie and Christopher’s life in the easy way that he’s always had about him. He’s at therapy sessions and dentist appointments, at the grocery store, and the empty side of Eddie’s bed when the nightmares tear him from sleep.
He’s everywhere, always; stitching Eddie back together, making something whole out of them.
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There’s too much heat. The flames crackle and curl in the busted windows. The house is only two stories high. If Buck would listen, if he’d turn around and get out – he could be at the door, he could be out of the fucking blast radius.
But Buck’s still standing in it.
Eddie is cursed.
Like he has been for years.
Eddie is the blast radius.
OR
Eddie Diaz is cursed.
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“You don’t have to,” Buck says quickly. “You could just leave it. Don’t look.”
Eddie glances up at him, and they both know without saying it that he isn’t going to let this go.
There’s no way he can look away now, not after seeing the way Buck reacted.
“Or maybe just not now,” Buck says softly, stepping closer, his hand settling gently over the screen like he can shield Eddie from what’s on it. “Maybe leave it for now. You’re not… Eddie, you’re not doing well right now. I’ve been so worried about you and this—” his voice catches, “—you… Eddie, please don’t. Just leave it.”
It stings to hear the worry out loud, even if he knew it was there.
He wants to do what Buck says, he wants to trust his friend and give him what he’s asking.
Buck never asks for anything.
Eddie moves Buck’s hand aside gently, giving it a brief squeeze. “Can’t do that, Buck.”
Or; After Christopher leaves for El Paso, Buck decides that he and Eddie should trace their family trees to keep Eddie’s mind occupied elsewhere. The results lead Eddie to face a family secret.
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“But why me?” Eddie asks.
“Everyone needs a nudge in the right direction now and then,” says Francis. “You… you need a firmer hand right now.”Eddie is dreading spending Easter in El Paso with his family, but after the events of last summer, he feels he has no choice. When he’s able to convince Buck to come along last minute he’s thrilled, but Eddie soon discovers he’s in for far more than he expected, including some divine intervention.
Or (spoilers): Eddie Diaz is such a hot mess express that literal Catholic saints have to start appearing to him to kick his ass in gear.
Set during spring 2025, almost one year after Chris spends the summer with his grandparents.
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Bobby had to fight himself from pulling Buck into a bone crushing hug, nearly everyday since the suicide call. All he wanted to do was pull Buck into a hug and kiss his forehead like he did with his kids.
But Buck wasn’t his son and he wasn’t Buck’s father.
He didn’t want to understand why that fact made him want to vomit.
“Three weeks’ worth of space. Thanks.” Buck chuckled sourly; the sound made Bobby’s skin burn- he could feel the bile pushing up. -
Blurred lines of our family (and the darkness that lures over me) by my_little_pie
Fandoms: 9-1-1 (TV)
24 Jun 2023
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In the heat of the moment Chris tells Buck something he didn’t mean. Buck can’t handle being told that he wasn’t wanted. His mind spirals and he almost doesn’t get to see his family again. The ocean took him once already, what’s one more attempt?
Read the tags and trigger warnings please!