lavenderseas
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Hawkeye gestured vaguely, defeated, and pushed his hair back. It was significantly silvered. Half a year home, and he still wore the war obviously: grey hair, defensive slouch, the sort of taut thinness that suggested illness or endurance sport. He looked like a person who couldn’t get comfortable. BJ wanted him comfortable with an intensity that ached.
__Wrung out and worse for wear, Hawkeye can't enjoy himself the way he used to. BJ does his best to help him recover his enthusiasm. In the process they find new ways to appreciate each other alongside more corporeal pleasures: sleeping, sex, and of course good food.
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Bookmarked by lavenderseas
13 Apr 2026
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Summary
Go back to the beginning of the Gentleman Doctors series to see how it all began. B. J., coming out in 50s San Francisco; Hawkeye, struggling with his dad in Maine. And the two of them at disconnect with each other. How to connect to your best friend and say, I'm lonely too when you're too confused to even put the words in a letter?
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Bookmarked by lavenderseas
29 Jun 2026
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"Once upon a time, I tried to find you in a dream."
_____Or, the story of how Hawkeye and BJ met again, told a few different times.
Bookmarked by lavenderseas
26 Jun 2026
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Suddenly he felt panicked and crazy. Dreams weren’t like this. Dreams didn’t rake the hot coals of the past so aggressively. Nostalgia, fantasy, booze tinted glasses were one thing, but this was another.
“It feels so real, Hawk,” BJ mumbled.
“BJ?” Hawkeye said. BJ could see him lift his head. His hair stood up, making a funny shadow on the wall. “Did you say something? Are you dreaming?”
“I can’t tell. This feels just like the day we met,” BJ said.
“The day we—oh,” Hawkeye’s voice got thin and vulnerable. “Oh, BJ, it’s all going to be okay. Trust me. You know me, don’t you? You know I wouldn’t lie?”
(BJ and Hawkeye get stuck in a time loop.)
Bookmarked by lavenderseas
23 Jun 2026
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B.J. has lost everything. His job, his marriage, and (for now, at least), access to his child.
Hawkeye's determined to prove that there's at least someone B.J. will never lose.
Bookmarked by lavenderseas
21 Jun 2026