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Hayden Pike had never really considered himself an ideas guy. He wasn’t afraid to admit that was entirely his wife’s department - she was smart enough for the two of them, thank God. He brought a lot of other qualities to the relationship, and he would do anything his wife asked, but they both agreed that things generally went a lot smoother if she came up with the plans.
But today was different. He had thought of something so smart, so perfect, absolutely foolproof. Jackie was going to be so proud of him! They were going to have so much sex about it! Okay, maybe he was getting a little ahead of himself. But it objectively was the most genius thing he had ever thought of, besides proposing to Jackie of course. And like basically everything in his life, it all started in the locker room.
“Boston Lily is texting you again!” Hayden called out after an intense early season practice. Shane, having just emerged from the shower, rolled his eyes. He was so weird about whoever this woman was, which made it all the more tempting to bring her up whenever possible.
“When are you gonna lock her down Hollzy?” Mitty asked from his adjacent locker, “It’s been forever, bro!”
“Fuck off. It’s not like that,” Shane retorted as he made a point to throw his phone deep into his gear bag.
“So secretive, our Captaine. He keeps his private life under lock and key so we think he only cares about hockey,” JJ teased.
“Woah, that actually explains so much, bro. You’re, like, so fucking smart. Making us think you’re too locked in to care about pussy, so we’ll be just as locked in. GOATed captain shit right there!” Taylor exclaimed. The kid was a good teammate and a decent defenseman, but he was never going to beat the allegations that he had had one too many concussions.
“You guys are hopeless,” Shane muttered, shaking his head as he continued packing up his gear.
“Nah man, no way it’s a front. Hollzy is married to the game. No time for a serious woman, you gotta respect the commitment though,” Wilson argued. At the same time, Hayden got a text from Jackie reminding him that he needed to pick up the kids’ Montreal Victoire jerseys on his way home from practice. Hayden stopped in his tracks, it felt like two puzzle pieces floated down from the sky and fit perfectly together. Holy fucking shit.
It was no secret that Shane Hollander loved one thing and one thing only, which was hockey. He spent his free time reading hockey books and watching game tape. He had an entire synthetic rink built at his cottage. He had an encyclopedic knowledge of every hockey stat from the modern era. It was so obvious - the reason he hadn’t fallen in love yet was because he needed to be with another hockey player, someone who cared about the game just as much as he did. Or, at least, almost as much as he did. Hayden didn’t know if there was anyone in the universe that loved it as much as Shane. But at the very least it needed to be someone that liked analyzing and shit talking other players’ gameplay for hours at a time. Someone that got a thrill from finding a new sketchy Eastern European streaming site that showed games from hockey leagues Hayden had never even heard of. Of course it hadn’t worked out with any of the women that he and Jackie had tried to set Shane up with, they didn’t care about the sport like that! How had he not realized this sooner?
And, thankfully, there were twenty-three professional women hockey players in their city!! Sure, that didn’t sound like a lot, especially when you factored in how many of them were probably single, but it was better than nothing! Hayden could branch out to other PWHL teams if needed on their roadies, but this seemed like the perfect place to start. Now he just had to figure out how to get Shane to spend some quality time with the Victoire players. How hard could that possibly be?
“Callie! Hey!” Hayden greeted the team’s social media manager excitedly as he bounded into her office. She looked up at him in surprise, reluctantly pausing her work to give this interruption her full attention.
“Hayden. What can I do for you?” She asked. Callie was in her late twenties and barely 5 feet tall, but she was the type of person that just demanded respect with her natural charisma and confidence. She could easily get an entire room of hockey players to shut up and do what she said, which was honestly one of the most impressive things Hayden had ever seen. He knew if anyone could find a way to do this, it would be her.
“I have a suggestion for community engagement,” Hayden said, getting straight to the point. She looked very skeptical, which was fair enough.
“You do?” She asked, crossing her arms.
“Yeah. There may be some ulterior motives, but still. It’s a good idea,” Hayden explained, and she rolled her eyes.
“For the last time, I cannot set up a cross promotion with Marvel so you all can go to the next Avengers premiere,” Callie groaned, clearly having already explained that way too many times.
“No, that’s not it. Wait, are the guys asking for that?” Hayden asked.
“You don’t even want to know,” Callie replied, shutting down that conversation.
“Got it,” Hayden said with a nod, “I was thinking we should do an event with the Victoire. Something that gives back to the community but would also let our teams get to know each other better.”
“I see. And you want to get to know the Victoire players better because…?” Callie asked, trailing off for him to fill in the explanation.
“I want to set Shane up with one of them, but I have no idea how else to do it,” Hayden answered sheepishly. Callie raised both of her eyebrows, clearly taking some time to process. Hayden figured it was a good sign that she wasn’t immediately rejecting this.
“It’s not a bad idea. Other NHL teams are doing better at community engagement than we are right now, and we are specifically lacking in the female ages 20-40 demographic. We could really use the positive engagement of the two teams supporting each other. But meddling in the captain’s personal life is not exactly a path I want to go down,” Callie explained.
“I totally get that. And it’s not like we would be sending them on a date or anything, obviously. I just want him to meet them organically, see what happens. Imagine how great a hockey power couple would be for social media,” Hayden said, and Callie sighed deeply.
“The numbers would be amazing. Okay, I’ll talk to Stephanie and suggest the idea, since she’s in charge of outreach. I’m not making any promises, but I’ll do my best,” Callie reluctantly agreed.
“Thank you so much! You are amazing,” Hayden replied, beaming at her answer.
“I know. Now get out of here before I change my mind,” she joked. Hayden didn’t need to be told twice as he practically ran out of the office area and to his car in excitement. He was the best bro in the world, Shane had no idea what was about to hit him. Would it be too soon to start planning the best man speech?
Shane was trying very hard not to be annoyed as he left practice to head to the local food bank where the Voyageurs and Victoire would be volunteering for the afternoon. It’s not that he didn’t like spending time helping people. It’s just that he had his schedule and routines down to a science, and he really hated having to deviate, especially last minute. And he only had a little over a week to mentally prepare for this disruption. Plus the Voyageurs had a grueling schedule coming up against several strong teams that he needed to watch a mountain of game tape on, so it was just bad timing.
He knew he needed to adjust his headspace so he didn’t come across as an arrogant dickhead. It was only a couple of hours after all, and it was a great cause. Plus Shane had been curious about some of the Victoire’s recent tactical changes, so maybe he could spend some time talking about that with them. He wouldn’t even have to see this as lost hockey time if he could use it as a learning opportunity. Yeah, maybe he wasn’t the best person. He’d have to start a charity or something someday to make up for it.
“Everyone, listen up!” Callie announced at the front of the crowded entrance housing two teams of hockey players. The noise died down instantly, and then she continued, “We have two different tasks that need to be done today - packing boxes for families and taking inventory of new donations. It’s very important that the inventory is done correctly, so we’ve decided that Rose Landry, Leah Campbell, and Shane Hollander will do that in the back room. The rest of you can follow Lydia to the packing area. Please listen to everything she says so Sydney and I can focus on our jobs of capturing content, not trying to corral you.”
Shane wasn’t expecting to be singled out, but of everyone on his team, he was the obvious choice for something like this. The other guys weren’t exactly known to be detail-oriented. He hoped that it wouldn’t be too awkward with Rose and Leah, but as the Captain and Alternate Captain respectively, he figured they would be up for talking at least a little hockey.
“Shane Hollander!” Rose greeted him excitedly as they entered their assigned workspace, “Detroit really didn’t go easy on you last night, huh?”
Shane smiled at the chirp - this was right in his comfort zone. The Voyageurs had played Detroit the night before, grinding out a 2-1 win. It wasn’t very pretty, but it was only their second game of the season and they were still finding their chemistry after the offseason roster changes.
“Ignore her. She’s an insufferable Red Wings fan,” Leah added, shaking her head at her teammate’s antics.
“Nah it’s fine. Maybe if your boys could actually learn how to kill a penalty they’ll start winning some games,” Shane chirped back, and both women laughed in surprise.
“I like you already, Hollander,” Rose said with a wide grin.
“Apparently not if you aren’t a Voyageurs fan. I root for you all even over my hometown team. And the Charge are actually contenders,” Shane retorted.
“Who knew Canada’s Golden Boy was so shady?” Leah asked in delight.
“Seriously! Where is this energy in front of the cameras?” Rose added.
“My mom would kill me if I went against my media training,” Shane explained with a shrug.
Lydia came in and talked them through their tasks. Once they got the hang of it, she left them to their own devices so she could go supervise the chaos gremlins out in the main packing area. Rose, Leah, and Shane settled into a comfortable conversation as they worked. What started as conversations about their seasons and other teams quickly drifted into more personal territory.
“How are you and Max adjusting now that the travel is starting up again?” Rose asked Leah.
Leah Campbell’s husband, Max Riley, had played for the Victoire and the Canadian National Team up until two years ago, when he decided to come out publicly as trans and started medically transitioning. He couldn’t play in the PWHL anymore as a man, and the NHL had an infuriatingly conservative gender policy, so he had to retire from professional hockey. Luckily Max had a good rapport with the Montreal Voyageurs owner (Shane had heard rumors that they were somehow related but didn’t want to make any judgements without facts), and he was hired as the GM for the Laval Rockets, the Voyageur’s AHL team. Max clearly knew puck because he had quickly turned the team around with some very savvy roster decisions. Shane was excited to see what they could do in Max’s second season, and he hoped some of the talent they were developing would show out for the Voyageurs during the inevitable injury call-ups.
“Ugh, don’t remind me. We were long distance for years before we got married, I should be to handle a couple of days or a week here and there, right? But I miss everything about being on the same team so much. Our FaceTime numbers are honestly embarrassing,” Leah admitted.
“I can imagine. I made Elena fall asleep with me on FaceTime every night for like the first month of training camp, and we’re not even close to your level. No one warned me how terrible it would be to readjust again after spending the entire summer together,” Rose replied, referring to her girlfriend. Shane had no idea she was in a relationship until today, but he really didn’t know anything about any of their personal lives. The only reason he knew about Max and Leah was because of the news coverage.
“Yeah it’s hell, the price we pay to follow our dreams. The jobs make up for it most of the time at least,” Leah agreed. Shane had to consciously still himself so he wouldn’t nod or say something in agreement. The last thing he could do was tell them how much he truly understood that sentiment.
“Does Max like being a GM? The transition to a front office role sounds intense,” Shane asked instead. He was genuinely curious what the move was like. He really didn’t like thinking about what would come after he was done playing hockey, but he knew a front office position of some sort was probably a good option. He couldn’t even fathom not having hockey in his life in some respect.
“He loves it, some days I think he likes it more than playing. He definitely felt like a fish out of water at first though,” Leah replied with a small smile.
“That’s good he’s happy, he’s doing a great job,” Shane said.
“I’ll have to pass that on. He’s going to freak, getting a compliment from the Shane Hollander,” Leah said with a laugh.
“Fuck off,” Shane retorted, rolling his eyes for good measure.
“What do you do during the summers, Shane?” Rose asked curiously, changing the subject.
“I have a cottage on a lake in Ottawa. I spend a couple of weeks completely relaxing and pretending the rest of the world doesn’t exist, you know? No emails or social media, just lots of swimming, hiking, and riding jet skis,” Shane answered.
“That sounds like a dream,” Rose said.
“Please, you couldn’t survive like two days without Instagram,” Leah retorted, “It really does sound lovely though.”
At that moment, Hayden came bursting into the room with the energy of a child that had just been given their first caffeinated soda. He practically yelled, “HOLLZY! My man! How’s it going in here, bro?”
“Hey Hayds. We’re doing good,” Shane replied calmly as he continued to work.
“Shane took one for the team and is doing the worst job,” Leah told Hayden, who beamed at that.
“I don’t mind. It’s pretty meditative actually,” Shane said with a shrug. He really wasn’t lying - he was kind of enjoying this. He was taking rice from the massive industrial sized bins that had been donated and putting 1,000 grams into individual containers to be given to families for the week. He was basically a food scale expert given his performance diet, so it really wasn’t a big deal.
“That’s my boy. This guy is a total gentleman, he’s always helping out the people he cares about. There isn’t a better dude in the NHL,” Hayden gushed, slapping Shane on the shoulder as he talked. Shane had no idea why Hayden was being so weird, he briefly wondered if JJ had given him Red Bull again.
“That’s factually not true. Carter Vaughn has won the Lady Byng three times. I’ve only won it once,” Shane pointed out, frowning at the inaccuracy.
“And he knows his hockey stats! Memory like a steel trap, he never forgets important dates or scheduled plans. He even knows all of my kids’ birthdays,” Hayden shared.
“It’s really not that hard, Hayds. I just actually use my calendar,” Shane said, making Rose and Leah laugh.
“It looks like your break is over, Pike. You might want to get back before Callie tracks you down,” Leah told him, pointing to the hallway where it had suddenly gone quiet.
“Fuck! See you beauticians later!” Hayden exclaimed, waving goodbye as he ran out of the room.
“Is Pike always like that?” Rose asked pointedly once he was gone.
“Like what?” Shane replied, needing clarification.
“Hovering like a parent on the playground,” Leah offered.
“While also trying to auction you off like a prized cattle,” Rose added.
“Oh. Yeah. It’s dumb, he just worries that I don’t have enough of a social life. He gets embarrassingly excited when I talk to new people,” Shane explained, pointedly staring at the rice he was working on. He was kind of annoyed at his friend for being so obviously weird. Shane was a perfectly capable adult, he could manage these things himself.
“Aw, is he trying to wingman you?” Rose asked.
“Ugh, probably. He’s constantly trying to set me up,” Shane complained, grimacing at the thought.
“And it hasn’t worked?” Leah asked.
“No. Maybe if he didn’t keep choosing the wrong fucking gender,” the words flew out of Shane’s mouth before he could stop them. He immediately froze, his entire body filling with panic at what he had just admitted. Out loud. Fuck. He quickly tried to recover but ended up rambling, “Oh. Um. I didn’t mean to say that. It’s not even really true. Or not like completely. Maybe? I think.”
“It’s okay Shane. We’re both queer, remember?” Rose said gently, laying a hand on top of his. He normally hated being touched by new people, but for whatever reason he didn’t mind with Rose. It was actually comforting, the gesture curbing his panic spiral briefly.
“Yeah this will always stay just between the three of us,” Leah confirmed. Shane definitely felt lighter knowing they would keep this secret, but he was still freaking the fuck out having said that out loud. He had no idea how his defenses had lowered, he didn’t even think he was completely gay or anything. There was a woman out there that he would be attracted to. There had to be.
“Thank you, I really appreciate it,” Shane said.
“Of course,” Rose said. Then she joked, “So do you want Pike to start setting you up with…the right gender? Because I would pay to watch him try to fumble his way through that.”
“Oh my God, definitely not. I’d rather jump into traffic,” Shane immediately shut that down, making them all laugh.
“Yeah it’s kind of awful when people try to matchmake for you. I spent like my entire college career dodging my family’s attempts. I was always kind of offended by the guys they chose for me,” Leah admitted.
“I know! I get they mean well, but seriously. It feels like they don’t know you at all sometimes,” Shane agreed, “Did things change with your aunts after they found out about Max?”
“Yes, but not in a bad way. They badgered me for years about when we were going to get married. Now they send a lot of articles about reciprocal IVF. My whole family is supportive in their own way,” Leah explained.
“That’s really great. Your careers have been fine too? Like your teams and sponsors are cool about it?” Shane asked. He figured he was already neck deep in it at this point, he might as well get the questions he was most curious about answered.
“I mean, the PWHL is hella sapphic. They’d have to kick out at least like a quarter of us if they decided to have a problem with the gays. Plus we really only get progressive sponsors because of that reputation anyways, so it doesn’t matter to them,” Leah answered honestly. It was sometimes so hard for Shane to process how different their leagues were. He didn’t know if there was even another gay guy in the entire league, he couldn’t even imagine if they were like an entire bloc.
“Yeah, I literally face off with my girlfriend every time we play and it’s not a problem at all. There’s enough of us dating players on other teams that it’s just accepted you’ll be professional about it,” Rose explained.
“Wait, really? Your girlfriend is also a center?” Shane asked curiously. He didn’t realize her girlfriend was also a hockey player, much less the same position.
“Yep, Elena Rygg - the New York Captain. We’ve been together for a year. We’re technically still soft launching the relationship, but everyone in our life has known the whole time,” Rose answered. Shane knew who Elena was - it was hard to watch a PWHL game without seeing her in an ad. He got goosebumps realizing that Rose and Elena were in a very similar position to him and Ilya. Not that they were doing anything other than fucking, obviously. But still. It was short circuiting his brain.
“Woah. And you guys are okay playing on different teams?” Shane asked curiously.
“I mean it’s fucking terrible being in different cities and I miss her all the time, but we both love our roles on our teams too much to give it up. We know we only have so much time before we retire, so it’s worth it to us. That might change, but it’s working for us for now. She’ll be so sick of seeing me all day every day when that time comes,” Rose answered honestly.
“What about you, Shane? Are you seeing anyone?” Leah asked gently.
“Not really. It’s…complicated,” Shane admitted, having no idea how to answer the question without opening an entire can of worms he wasn’t ready to touch.
“Got it,” Leah said, seeming to sense that he did not want to go into any details.
“Well if you ever do want to talk about it, we have a standing weekly hangout at my place. It’s us, Naomi, Morgan, and Max if he’s not working. We just watch whatever hockey game is on and shit talk about it and our lives, mostly. It’s super low pressure, but you’re always welcome to join,” Rose offered.
“Naomi has a track record of dating the most bizarre people possible, so her stories are very entertaining. It’s worth it for that alone,” Leah added.
“Thanks. I’ll let you know, I think that could be nice,” Shane replied. He was overwhelmed at the idea of having an entire group of friends he could talk about this part of himself with. The idea was terrifying, but also exhilarating. He had so much to think about tonight.
“A glowing agreement!” Rose joked.
“Not to change the subject, but did you guys watch the Admirals game last night? I’ve been dying to talk about it. Their penalty kills have been raging disasters. And don’t even get me started on Scott Hunter’s inconsistency,” Leah launched into a very welcome change in subject. Shane was thankful to be back on familiar footing, and he really did enjoy talking shop with Rose and Leah. By the time their volunteer shift ended, Shane was actually disappointed it was over. Maybe he would actually take them up on their offer for a weekly hangout.
Shane spent the next two days trying to throw himself so hard into his early season routine he didn’t have room to think about anything else. He was failing spectacularly at that though. No matter how tired his body was or how many game tapes he analyzed, his mind kept drifting back to the admission he made to Rose and Leah.
It’s not that Shane thought we was 100% straight. He obviously wasn’t, he wasn’t that in denial given how much he enjoyed sex with Ilya Rozanov. He just never allowed himself to try to put an actual number too it, way too terrified for what he’d find. There had to be some woman out there he was attracted to, right? Even if he was 1% straight, he’d take it.
Fed up with the cat and mouse game he was playing in his own mind, Shane decided the most logical next step was to do research. So he broke down his sexual experiences as if they were game tape. Was it absolutely neurotic and mortifying? Yes. Did he have any better options? No.
As he forced himself to relive all of his hookups, he realized that every single time with Rozanov was exponentially better than any other sex he ever had. That was, unfortunately, in a league of its own and needed to be treated as its own category. The gold standard, if you will. The rest of his hookups could fall into two categories - sex with women and sex with men.
Shane had only been with two guys that weren’t Rozanov. Both experiences were hot, but they were massively hampered by his nerves about getting outed. Even still, he hadn’t had any issues getting hard or orgasming. He really enjoyed the other guys’ bodies, even if he was subconsciously comparing them to Rozanov. Sex with women, on the other hand, had left a lot of room for improvement. His younger experiences with his girlfriend had mostly just been fooling around and experimenting, but they were like a million times more awkward than his first time with Rozanov. The occasional hookups he had since had been perfectly fine, if a little lackluster. There definitely hadn’t been a spark, and he recognized that the women were beautiful, but he hadn’t felt particularly pulled to them or anything. It had taken him a long time to get hard a few times, but he had chalked that up to the drinking he had done on those nights. Just because he hadn’t had a phenomenal sexual experience with a woman yet, that didn’t mean it couldn’t happen. He just needed to change the conditions.
Shane had identified the problem - he needed to find women that would get him hard without having to think about someone else (Rozanov), and he needed a woman that wanted to top. Since he was already so far past the point of having any dignity left, Shane just bit the bullet and went to PornHub. He cringed as he typed “pegging” into the search bar, nearly slamming the laptop down in embarrassment as he scrolled through the results. But Shane Hollander was not a quitter, so he persevered through the discomfort and really focused. He watch portions of countless videos, strap-ons of all shapes, colors, and sizes, but none of the women were really doing it for him. He came across the term “muscle mommies” and thought that might be promising, but even the women built like brick shithouses still weren’t masculine enough for him.
And then Shane had a thought. He was pretty awkward when it came to vaginas, finding eating pussy to be a neutral yet labor intensive experience. It was nothing like sucking dick. Maybe he just needed a penis involved to be into it. There were plenty of women with penises after all. So he waded into the algorithm of trans women porn. This turned Shane on more than pegging had, but it still wasn’t quite working for him. After so much frustration, he still ended up back at his go-to genre, jock on jock. The trans women were talented and beautiful, but he needed masculine energy to get off. So much for that rabbit hole.
After Shane had finally finished, the post-nut clarity hit him hard. He could not find one single woman on a porn site. This was dire. Hit the emergency button, sound the sirens, Shane Hollander was mostly likely completely gay. Fuck.
So he panicked. He went down a couple of self loathing thought spirals so dramatic and unrealistic he felt nauseous. He finally pulled himself out of it and realized that he needed to talk about all of this with someone who would understand. Without thinking it through (something he would usually never even dream of), he pulled out his phone and called Rose Landry.
“Hello?” Rose answered after the fourth ring.
“Hi,” Shane replied, suddenly embarrassed that he did this. He had no idea what he wanted to say, or how he could possibly start this conversation. He was silent as he debated hanging up and pretending this had never happened.
“Shane? Are you okay? It’s like 11 o’clock,” Rose asked, concern clear in her voice.
“Sorry. Yeah I’m fine, I didn’t realize it was so late already. Sorry this was stupid, I can let you go-” Shane apologized, feeling so guilty for interrupting his friend’s night. God, this was so stupid. He was a disaster.
“Shane! Stop! No need to apologize, you’re totally fine. I’m just watching the new season of Real Housewives,” Rose said lightheartedly, “So what’s going on?”
“You’re a lesbian, right?” Shane blurted out and then instantly cringed. Fuck, he was not doing this correctly. It was fun having a new group of friends while it lasted.
“Yeah. I thought we covered this already,” Rose laughed. That was a good sign, she hadn’t been scared off by his inability to be normal yet. Shane decided he might as well go full steam ahead at this point.
“Just double checking. How did you know you weren’t bi? That you didn’t like any guys at all?” Shane asked curiously.
Rose paused, probably taking time to really consider it before she answered thoughtfully, “It just got to the point where I figured, if I could be attracted to a man it would have happened by now. I have four older brothers and an engineering degree, I’ve been around basically every kind of guy possible. Why fight my instincts when I’m attracted to so many women, you know? So many things in life are difficult, but being attracted to your person shouldn’t be one of them.”
“Fuck. That’s so logical,” Shane groaned. That answer made way too much sense to him, he unfortunately related to it pretty hard. Although he spent most of his time surrounded by male hockey players, his friends and teammates had tried setting him up with like every kind of woman possible at that point. If he hadn’t found someone by now…
“Are you having some realizations?” Rose asked gently.
“Unfortunately,” Shane grumbled.
“And you’re majorly panicking about it?” She asked knowingly.
“Maybe,” he admitted.
“Oh Shane. I’m sorry babe,” Rose replied, “It can be a lot to process.”
“I can’t be gay Rose. I just can’t,” he vented, his body shaking as he tried to grapple with the weight of this. Of what this meant for his career, his future, his entire life. Fuck.
“Men’s hockey fucking sucks sometimes. But I’m here for you, we’ll find a way to make this work. You deserve love and happiness, okay? Hockey doesn’t get to get in the way of that,” Rose said confidently. Shane appreciated the sentiment, but he really didn’t think that was possible.
“It does suck. Fucking locker room culture bullshit,” he agreed, not touching the rest. Rose really didn’t need to know his plan to stay in the closet until after retirement - he couldn’t handle even more pity and concern right now.
“Yes! Fuck the locker room! Fuck toxic masculinity!” Rose exclaimed passionately.
“Is that a thing?” Shane asked, eyebrows furrowed. He had never heard the phrase before.
“Oh no. You have so much to learn, Hollander,” Rose joked, “Thank God for our hangouts. You’re coming over tomorrow, right?”
“Oh. I’m not sure…” Shane trailed off. He really didn’t want to say no, but he was also a hot mess right now. The last thing he really wanted to do was go hang out with people. He wanted to wallow in peace.
“It wasn’t actually a question. Be here at 7 with your beverage of choice,” Rose demanded. Shane quickly relented before saying goodbye to his new friend. He felt a little better having talked to someone who understood. Maybe tomorrow wouldn’t be so bad after all.
“You want to come over tonight? Jackie can make those grain bowls again,” Hayden offered Shane as they were changing after a particularly grueling practice. It had been a little while since he had invited him over with the new season chaos, and he selfishly wanted to debrief from the food bank event. Hayden was scheming for the first time in his life, after all. He needed to check in or some shit. That’s what Jackie would probably tell him at least. She was always asking her friends smart, emotionally vulnerable questions.
“Sorry, can’t. I have plans,” Shane said with a shrug, not looking up as he continued taking off and packing his gear.
“You do?!” Hayden asked, unable to hide the shock in his voice.
“Don’t act so surprised,” Shane retorted with an eye roll.
“‘Course, sorry. You just never have plans after practice,” Hayden apologized, immediately feeling bad. It’s just that Shane basically never deviated from his normal routine - there had to be something going on.
“Now I do,” he said shortly.
“Are you going to tell me about them? Or is it some big secret?” Hayden asked, trying to sound lighthearted as possible. He knew if he came off too excited or weird he would spook his best friend.
“I’m going to hang out with some of the Victoire players. We’re gonna watch the Fleet/Frost and Sharks/Scouts games,” Shane explained. Hayden froze briefly, his eyes widening. Holy fucking shit, did his plan actually work??? Was this a date?!?!?!?! His internal thoughts were screaming in excitement.
“Woah. Good for you man,” Hayden said as cooly as possible. Totally chill and casual as always. Then he asked, “Is Rose Landry going to be there?”
“Yeah, it’s her house,” Shane said, giving him a weird look.
“She’s hot,” Hayden offered. It was objectively true - Hayden didn’t know if the PWHL had all the hottest player Cosmo polls and stuff like the NHL did, but if so, she would definitely win them like Shane always did. It would be almost unfair how hot they would be together.
“Fuck off Hayds. It’s not like that,” Shane said, rolling his eyes once again. Fuck, Hayden needed to pull it back.
“No?” He asked cautiously.
“She’s in a relationship. And even if she wasn’t, I’m definitely not her type,” Shane explained. Hayden frowned at that - surely Shane was everyone’s type. Or at least every woman’s type. Definitely not his. He didn’t mean it like that.
“Okay, okay. Sorry bud. Maybe one of them is single though?” Hayden tried to recover.
“Odds are very slim. I’m just trying to hang out with friends, okay? It’s not a whole thing,” he answered, shaking his head. Hayden could tell he was about to completely shut down this conversation.
“Okay, I’ll shut up. Hope you have fun,” Hayden said.
“Thanks. Give Jackie and the kids my love,” Shane replied before making his way over to the showers. This was a positive step in the right direction, but clearly Hayden still had some work to do to get Shane a hockey girlfriend. He would have to brainstorm.
The second Hayden arrived home, he was searching for his wife. He yelled, “JACKIE!!! We have a mystery to solve!”
“Can I at least get a hello first?” Jackie asked with an unimpressed smirk as she appeared in the hallway to greet him.
“Sorry, you’re right,” Hayden agreed quickly, “Hi, how was your day? You look gorgeous.”
“Thanks baby. I’m glad you’re home. Your children have been a handful and a half,” Jackie replied, pulling him in for a hug and brief kiss.
“No, not the Pikes,” Hayden retorted sarcastically. Unfortunately for both of them, the twins had gotten Hayden’s chaotic nature and inability to sit still. He asked, “Want me to take them outside for a while? I picked up more sidewalk chalk on my way home.”
“Maybe tomorrow. I want to hear all about this mystery first,” Jackie replied.
“You aren’t going to believe this. Our sweet, independent Shane is going to Rose Landry’s house tonight to watch hockey with a bunch of the Victoire players!” Hayden exclaimed, speaking way too fast in his excitement. He loved gossiping with his wife - getting to talk about people they knew was one of the most underrated parts of being married in his opinion.
“Wow. I had no idea he was friends with them,” Jackie said.
“They met at the food bank thing we did last week. So anyways, I mentioned that Rose was beautiful, right? I was trying to see if I could get any more information out of him,” Hayden explained, and Jackie raised her eyebrows.
“My subtle husband,” she joked, shaking her head. She was long used to his antics at this point, and thankfully she found them amusing yet charming. At least most of the time.
“I know, I know. But this is the even weirder part! He said she’s in a relationship, and even if she wasn’t, there is no way he’d be her type! Shane!! I’m pretty sure he’s every woman’s type! He models for like a million brands,” Hayden shared.
“Huh. Maybe she doesn’t date other hockey players?” Jackie suggested.
“But how would Shane be so sure about that fact? There has to be something else. I’m worried he isn’t confident enough in himself. Do you think he knows he’s the sexiest player in the league?” Hayden asked earnestly.
“You think he’s the sexy?” Jackie teased, wiggling her eyebrows at her husband. Hayden rolled his eyes.
“Fuck off! I just mean that’s what Cosmo says,” he said defensively. He definitely did not have a crush on Shane. It was not like that!!!
“Swear Jar,” she chided.
“But you get what I mean! Maybe we need to work on building his confidence,” Hayden suggested. He wasn’t really sure what to do, but he knew Jackie would have a better idea.
“Before we jump to that conclusion, do you even know anything about Rose’s current partner? There could be a much simpler answer,” Jackie pointed out, pulling out her phone.
“No, nothing,” Hayden admitted. Jackie shook her head as she scrolled, quickly finding whatever she was looking for.
“Alright, I found her Instagram,” Jackie said, still scrolling, “Ah, Shane is definitely correct. Not her type at all.”
Jackie turned her phone to show her husband a picture of Rose Landry with another gorgeous woman. Rose was kissing her cheek on a beach as the other woman smiled brightly at the camera.
“That could just be her best friend? Or maybe roommate? Aren’t women like weirdly affectionate with their friends?” Hayden asked.
“Hayds, the caption is literally lyrics to Into You by Ariana Grande. Please use your brain,” Jackie retorted. He looked once again, and yeah, the pose did look to be more than friendship. His wife was probably right, as always.
“Okay, I think you’re right. That’s good though, I don’t need to worry about Shane’s self confidence,” Hayden said. He really was relieved - even though it sucked that Rose probably wouldn’t date his friend, at least they could focus on better prospects now. Ones that were hopefully not lesbians. He had forgotten to factor that in as a possibility when setting Shane up with PWHL players. It definitely didn’t help the odds.
“You can save your lecture about how sexy he is for another day,” Jackie joked. She was enjoying that way too much, in Hayden’s opinion.
“It’s my responsibility as the A to hype him up Jacks,” Hayden whined.
“It looks like she posted a story about tonight. Let’s see who she tagged,” Jackie said, ignoring his response as she continued to navigate Instagram. There were three other women, and as they scrolled through their profiles, a theme quickly emerged.
“So they all are either married or are currently dating women?” Hayden asked, pointing out the obvious.
“It looks like it,” Jackie agreed, finally putting her phone away as they had their answers.
“Shane is going to watch hockey with a gaggle of lesbians?” Hayden continued. He was confused.
“We don’t know how they identify. Leah clearly isn’t as she’s married to a man. They could be bi or pan, or many other labels,” Jackie explained slowly. She really needed to sign her husband up for an inclusivity training or something.
“Ah okay. It’s like reverse Queer Eye!” Hayden exclaimed, the breakthrough suddenly coming to him.
“Hayden…what?!?!” Jackie asked, speechless.
“He’s clearly hanging out with a bunch of gay women to help him be more comfortable around women without any pressure! It’s like practice dating! Who else would have a better idea of what women are looking for?” Hayden explained his thought process. Jackie just shook her head, she didn’t even know where to start with that crackpot theory.
“Oh my God. Wait, that was your takeaway from that show? That they assembled a squad of gays and an entire production crew just to help people bang?!” She asked incredulously.
“Well, yeah. Love you so much, Jacks. I wouldn’t have figured this out without you!” Hayden replied, kissing her cheek.
“You don’t think there might be a more simple explanation for why Shane would want to hang out with a group of queer hockey players?” Jackie suggested, hoping the words might get through her husband’s thick skull.
“Nah, we solved it babe! I know exactly what to do!” Hayden confidently replied. Then he saw the time and decided it was time to get moving for the rest of their evening. He yelled, “Ruby! Jade! Time to get ready for soccer practice!”
“Fucking hockey boys,” Jackie muttered under her breath. She was beyond ready to have the house to herself for a couple of hours. In the meantime, she ordered a pride flag magnet for their refrigerator. Just because her husband was about as observant as a pile of bricks, that didn’t mean she couldn’t be a good, low-key ally in the meantime.