chemonya



Recent bookmarks

  1. Public Bookmark *

    The Cottage, The Cookies, and The Cigarettes by

    Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types  

    04 Jun 2026

    Tags
    Summary

    Ilya has been at Shane's cottage for a week when he starts to feel unwell. Shane is booked in to present an award in New York with his mother, leaving David Hollander to hold the fort.
    David starts to notice something about Ilya that worries him.
    A emotional little fic in three parts.
    Ilya really needs a hug, and some IV medication. And then another hug.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,996
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    62
    Kudos:
    703
    Bookmarks:
    127
    Hits:
    7,472
    Bookmarked by chemonya

    23 Jun 2026

  2. Public Bookmark 68

    'Cause baby I've never seen brown eyes look so blue by

    Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV)  

    14 May 2026

    Tags
    Summary

    Ilya Rozanov was not scared of death.
    He didn’t understand how anyone could be. Death was not scary to him. That doesn’t mean he was being careless or actively seeking out ways to die.
    I mean sure, he could admit he didn’t look both ways before crossing the road, or stop drinking when on medication or even drink responsibly at that. He didn’t panic when he held his breath underwater for just that bit too long it started to burn his lungs and yeah, he could get a bit clumsy when using kitchen knives, sometimes wondering what would happen if he just moved his blade that bit closer to his wrist, thinking about how it would cut deep and bleed and then he-
    Ilya Rozanov wasn’t scared of death and he wasn’t actively seeking it out. Not that he would tell anyone if he was

    OR
    Ilya rozanov is depressed, traumatised and slavic so he refuses to accept help from the people who care about him and tries to just man up and take it (but shocker he can't)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    15,763
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    16
    Kudos:
    360
    Bookmarks:
    68
    Hits:
    5,177
    Bookmarked by chemonya

    21 Jun 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

    Nothing by

    Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types  

    07 May 2026

    Tags
    Summary

    He looked down at the dirty floor; he needed to clean up. To get rid of the evidence that this had ever happened. Not that anyone was ever coming over anymore, it had been just him for months. He couldn’t bear the idea of someone being in his house, not after… Not after he was the last person here. And he ran away. And that settled something in Ilya about his worth that so deeply told him that that was the end of everything. Of them. Of himself. That he wasn’t worth anything. He was nothing.

    /
    OR

    Ilya knew he was depressed, he feared he took after his mother that way. No one else knew Ilya was depressed, and maybe that was part of the problem. Facing the aftermath and the guilt from failing to kill himself seemed to be a whole other issue. Especially when it came to Jane and Jane finding out what he did.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,982
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    26
    Kudos:
    819
    Bookmarks:
    131
    Hits:
    6,794
    Bookmarked by chemonya

    21 Jun 2026

  4. Public Bookmark 17

    You Said Fuck Off and I Said Nothing for a While by

    Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV)  

    27 May 2026

    Tags
    Summary

    After the Boxing Day fight ends with words neither Shane nor Ilya can take back, their relationship quietly fractures under the weight of hockey, secrecy, and everything left unsaid.

    Weeks later, the breakup still echoes louder than either of them admits. When Shane starts moving on, Ilya tries to convince himself he’s fine—until a game in Boston forces everything he’s been avoiding straight to the surface.

    On the ice, something breaks.

    In the locker room afterward, Ilya finally says out loud what he’s been carrying since that night: the fight, the feeling of being someone’s second choice, and the words that never stopped replaying in his head.

    Because sometimes the hardest part isn’t losing someone.

    It’s realizing exactly when you started to.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,072
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    76
    Bookmarks:
    17
    Hits:
    848
    Bookmarked by chemonya

    20 Jun 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

    Shatterproof by

    Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV), Game Changers Series - Rachel Reid, Game Changers | Heated Rivalry - All Media Types  

    08 Jun 2026

    Tags
    Summary

    Ilya refuses to cancel dinner with Shane's parents, terrified that showing weakness will make them think he is lazy, broken, or a disappointment. But when a severe depressive episode causes his hands to shake, he accidentally drops a crystal water glass.

    The sound of the shattering glass triggers a violent childhood trauma, sending Ilya into a full-blown, terrifying panic attack on the dining room floor as he frantically tries to clean up the mess before he gets hit.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,055
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    89
    Kudos:
    2,674
    Bookmarks:
    549
    Hits:
    27,897
    Bookmarked by chemonya

    20 Jun 2026