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    “Earth spider animals are so beautiful and intelligent,” Teacher Grace said compassionately to Combustion-Fighter. A thrum of spider animals was going by on the street as it said this. “I wish there was a way I could talk to them and teach them about magnetism.”
    That was called ‘foreshadowing.’

    Three Eridian kids try and write a romance novel about their teacher.

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    01 Jul 2026

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    “Grace lie,” Rocky says impatiently. “Stop wasting time. Tell what is wrong, now.”

    Well, I’m not doing that. Even if I wanted to, I don’t know how I'd even begin explaining to Rocky that the only thing wrong with me is the fact that I want him to pin me down with his voice, shake out half a dozen orgasms, and then knock me out for good measure.

    So we're going with plan B: time to fool the walking lie detector.

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    23 Jun 2026

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    After the Taumoeba leak, after I decided to die after all and turned my ship around to save Rocky, after Rocky's frantic calculations about food supplies, Taumoeba multiplication rates, and human caloric intake needs, after we realized that with some rationing and luck I would make it, but that we were headed toward the unknown territory of trying to rapid-prototype me a life support system and synthetic food supply on an inhospitable planet: after all of that, after everything, I shouldn't have been surprised that it only took a few months on board the Hail Mary for things to get weird.

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    10 Jun 2026

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    “Proof of concept,” ♫♬♯♩♩♫ says. “We’ve tested it thoroughly to ensure it fits the specified nutritional profile, and several members of our team have ingested small amounts of it to ensure there were no adverse effects.”

    “You ate some of it?” I ask, rudely. I’m too irate to mind my language. Who do they think they are? That meat is for Grace. In a way, that meat is Grace.

    “Yes,” ♫♬♯♩♩♫ says. They and the rest of the human life support thrum know better than to be offended by my occasionally strange behaviour. “Obviously we weren’t going to risk the life of Honoured Grace on a completely untested technology.”

    That doesn’t mean much. There’s a lot of things that are safe for ingestion by Eridians that would outright kill a human.

    Trust Grace, I remind myself. He’ll have thought of all this.

    (OR: Grace's meburgers from the book epilogue. Let's talk about those!)

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    08 Jun 2026

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    If this record is a confession, let it be a complete one: the human-thinking-machine Rocky was gifted has everything on it. With the aid of the device Rocky had made back aboard the Mary that translates light on Grace’s human-visual displays to texture on Rocky’s Eridian-sonar display, accessing all of humanity’s combined wisdom is as easy as making a database query.

    Rocky consumes approximately 1,600 Earth-hours of human pornography before the ship’s engines cease to function, leaving it dead and stranded in space. Again.

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    04 Jun 2026