ScissorMe
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“As usual, Erling and Jude are play fighting like usual best friends would.. right?”
Bookmarked by ScissorMe
21 Jul 2026
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You're in a house, and just when you find nothing, she finds you
Bookmarked by ScissorMe
21 Jul 2026
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There’s an electricity in the air as their eyes meet, their scents flaring a little with the emotion, but then something shifts.
Erling breaks their eye contact, almost nervously, glancing over at Jude’s family and then at the floor. It’s very rare to see Erling look so unsure of himself.
“I’m sorry,” Erling says, his voice a little shaky. “I can’t wait. I need to ask you something.”
For a moment, Jude panics. The illogical part of his brain tells him that something awful is about to happen, that maybe Erling is going to break up with him or give him some horrible news or ask him why he really cares so much about some stupid bronze medal -
But then Erling takes Jude’s hands in his own and sinks to one knee.
“I wasn’t going to do this here,” Erling blurts out, “so I didn’t even bring the ring.”
OR
Jude has just collected his bronze medal following the England v France game, when Erling catches him off guard with a question.
Bookmarked by ScissorMe
21 Jul 2026
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“It’s not just sex,” said Erling instantly. He needed Jude to understand. “It’s not.”
“No?” said Jude with a humourless laugh. “What is it then? An affair? Intercourse? Lovemaking?” he said mockingly. “Want to make love to me, Haaland?”
“No,” snapped Erling, feeling frustration simmering within him which he quickly forced back down. He wasn’t going to rise to Jude’s provocation. “I mean, it isn’t just sex to me. Because I do love you.”
“Shut up,” said Jude fiercely, “don’t be a prat.”
“I do,” Erling continued. “I love you. Do you think I’m lying to you?”
Erling is in love with Jude. Jude is in love with Erling. They make it considerably more complicated than it needs to be.
Bookmarked by ScissorMe
21 Jul 2026
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“There’s only one way to weather your heat before the game against Norway,” Tuchel muses, like what he is about to say isn't the most diabolical thing that Jude has heard in his life.
“Yeah?”
He takes a deep breath, so Jude does too, mentally preparing himself.
“You need to put a dick in you.”
“... come again?”
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Bookmarked by ScissorMe
21 Jul 2026