BittenCleanOff
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Summary
He isn’t expecting the way Valentino walks, for some reason. Maybe it’s the extra limbs. Maybe it’s the wings. Maybe it’s the heels. Vox had skipped briefly through a few of the slut’s movies, for research, and isn’t expecting the way Valentino moves in person to feel so…
Different.
“…You must be my four o’clock,” he says, standing and offering a hand. Oh, shit, he’s huge. Valentino towers over him, easily would without the stripper heels. Vox is not afraid of heights.
~
(in the same universe as "Hail, Horrors, Hail," but absolutely not necessary to read for this one)
Series
- Part 2 of and on my deathbed, all I'll see is you
Bookmarked by BittenCleanOff
03 Jun 2026
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Summary
In another lifetime, Church helps Astarion ascend before impulsively following his lover into darkness — vowing that neither of them will ever have to be alone again. But when the warlock wakes up from his transformation, he realizes far too late that the person he trusts and loves the most has become yet another inescapable patron. And so, when the battle against the Absolute demands yet another transformative sacrifice from the tiefling, he finds himself wondering…
What more does he have to lose?
(A companion piece to “Mirror, mirror,” but previous reading not required.)
Series
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 76,939
- Chapters:
- 20/20
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 229
- Kudos:
- 191
- Bookmarks:
- 18
- Hits:
- 5,787
Bookmarked by BittenCleanOff
01 Jun 2026
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Summary
“Have you really thought about the things I cannot give you?” She reaches out and parts the folds of his mind, her own face impassive and wet through his eyes. “This.” She concentrates, projecting the image of her former self, naked and wanting, into his mind. “Or this.” Another image of her elven body, now heavy with his child. “Or this.” She twists the image until it’s the two of them elderly and grey, their withered hands clasped together.
Such pictures are not hard to conjure for her. Once, they were her own wants, the things she’d dreamed about a lifetime ago now. All the things she can’t be.
After the Netherbrain lay in the Chionthar and they’d found one of the city’s unscathed inns, she’d simply sat in the dark as he slept and contemplated just how truly alien she was compared to him. All the parts of her he’d loved, the places he’d whispered his devotion against– they’d gone. There was nothing left that could fit together, not as lovers should.
Bookmarked by BittenCleanOff
01 Jun 2026
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Summary
[Helluva Halloween Exchange 2025]
Omega Goetias don't exist, as far as Stolas knows. So when he presents as one, he panics and flees.
Blitz is freshly on the streets when he hears about the missing Goetia. The only person from his past to not hate him. Maybe, for once, he can save someone rather than destroy them, if only he can find them before the royal guards.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 8,396
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 17
- Kudos:
- 245
- Bookmarks:
- 30
- Hits:
- 2,274
Bookmarked by BittenCleanOff
31 May 2026
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Summary
" Stolas shakes his head quickly. “My apologies - I mean to be genuine. You are so dashing.”
Blitzo chances a look down at his ratty old leather jacket and the ripped jeans that are maybe more rip than jean at this point. Meanwhile, Stolas' sleeve ruffles look like they take a whole F1 pit crew to steam and press each morning.
“Besides,” Stolas continues, “I'm trying to piss off my father before my wedding.”
Blitzo watches him struggle to push his bangs from his face, settling them mostly over two eyes. He realises that the piercing must be angelic steel and he presses his thighs together, trying not to hump the sofa like a sad virgin.
“You know -” he swallows dryly, “- I'm kind of getting that vibe. It's real sexy.” "
Or:
Sick of Blitz and Stolas' pent up bullshit, Loona casts a spell to make them more honest with each other. Unfortunately, the spell goes wrong and they revert to their teenage selves. Fortunately, it does make them more honest about their feelings!
Bookmarked by BittenCleanOff
31 May 2026