Chapter Text
Lately , it’s been a lot colder. But for all the wrong reasons.
Tsukasa can only watch helplessly from behind his window as snow drifts and falls, billowing into a small white sheet to shield Mother Nature, like the feathers of an angel falling to earth.
His hair, being the bold yellow seeping into peach it is , like it carries the warmth of a pool of stars, not helping much in his current predicament. An offsetting cold had settled in Kamiyama, throwing him off in almost every aspect.
First it started with school. The walks from his house to Kamiyama highschool used to feel simple, easy. It was like the walk in the park it was supposed to be. Shikoku is a small but peaceful town. The people are all the same passionate and kind souls, yet all carrying a different meaning to themselves. Everyone is different, for the good and for the bad. But the snow had brought a fog to his mind, or was it really the snow? It just feels like the easiest thing to blame, since change is better to explain away the growing unease in his own skin.
Now it was cold. The air always felt hard and stale, like if he took a bite out of something he knew he couldn’t chew, but wasn’t willing to spit out. Even as he walked now, a trudge to his own sentence rather than a walk to school. It was so unusual too, the temperature really gets to a person.
Tsukasa watched as the snow fell, landing in small mounds at his feet. His breath crystallized before him, swirling up into the air before thawing out. It was almost magical to him. He’d bundled up best he could, which just meant wearing his royal blue cardigan and a red scarf to match it.
He walked along the sidewalk, now unusually barren with most either in their cars or out sick from school. Usually, it wouldn’t be quiet no matter how many more or how many little people were there. He’d always had someone to talk to, someone to laugh with no matter what time.
His walks to school used to bring him joy, he used to think that he was just excited to go to school. But face it, what teenager really wants to go to school when the suns barely shown up. Now that he’s gone, he can finally tell what he’s missing.
The sun, the brightest star in our solar system (and tsukasa’s arch rival) had started to peak, mounting itself in the heart between the mountains, spilling light all over the snow, dying it a fluttering hue of gold and pink. The sky itself was like a painting. Sharp yet light colors, so beautifully crafted. Tsukasa, although avidly hateful for bugs and anything that had more than 2 legs, had learned to appreciate the world around him.
As he reached the school, the silence that’d been drowning him had started to ease through as students cleared into his vision. Friends he’d known for forever, and acquaintances he’d met just this year. He himself, Tenma Tsukasa, was known for both the good and the bad. A hardworking flamboyant young boy who was very impressionable, but also a house of cards ready to be blown over. He didn’t want to admit it, but he knew exactly why he was so flimsy.
His glue, a tall young man with messy purple hair with sharp teal streaks running at the sides of his bangs, like lightning running through him, representing the machine which was his mind that was always running. Like a gear, chugging away hard at work. With deep gold eyes which anyone could mistake for real jewels, and a smile which looked more like a cat’s smug expression. Yes, his glue, was his own best friend Rui Kamishiro.
But that same glue, that kept him motivated to keep trying better, has been thwarting at him. He couldn’t focus, if he’d let his mind wander for even a second, it’d always go to him. Even when he goes to work, the Sekai is just about as clueless as he is, a mix of brighter colors and misshapen objects. What could this even mean? WonderlandxShowtime , his troupe and his found family, had felt different.
Rui used to be the one to walk with Tsukasa, hear him, see him for the star he truly is and not just part two of the weirdo wombo combo. But now, he was spending more time “strengthening bridges” with someone. Someone that while he loved dearly as a friend, also makes him feel a sick bubbly feeling at the pit of his stomach. Every time they were together, he’d feel his face get hot, his face slowly matching his ends. He couldn’t name the feeling in him, it felt like needles piercing his skin from within him. Feeling painful and…. Guilty?
For what would he feel guilt for? He had no idea. It was all her fault anyways, SHE should be the guilty one. Not him. Yet here he was, standing in the wings opposite of them, wishing he could do anything. Scream, cry, tell Rui to come back, to go back to being by his side. Yet alas, there wasn’t anything he could do. He couldn’t go to Nene for sure, he couldn’t tell her to stop talking to Rui, that’d just be silly. He’s a star, stars don’t throw temper tantrums over such small things. So why? Why did he feel like who was supposed to be his friend, felt more like his rival than anything?