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The first time it happens, Jade isn’t able to fall asleep for two days after.
She has just got home after saying goodbye to Kit at the end of their usual Friday night together – a ritual that has been going on for almost a year now, ever since Kit moved into the brand new building next to Jade’s older one. Jade couldn’t stand the noise that the construction site has caused for months, but at least now her best friend lives next door, which has quickly evolved in spending most of the time at each other’s house.
Work at the lab has been taking up a lot of Jade’s extra time lately, but on Fridays she leaves at 5 pm like clockwork. She knows how irritable Kit gets when Jade is late on their Friday nights and doesn’t want to leave her waiting. Never mind that it’s also her favorite moment of the week, the event in her calendar she looks forward to the most.
It’s her best friend, after all.
The movie they have decided to watch tonight has put her in a good mood, and she can’t wait to get a good night’s sleep before the busy day she has ahead of her tomorrow.
She goes through her bedtime routine surprisingly quickly and is ready to go to sleep when she notices Kit’s bedroom light is still on. Glancing outside to see what her friend is still doing up, Jade is startled by what she sees: Kit lying on her bed, eyes shut and mouth open, gasping for air as her hand moves gently but surely inside her underwear.
Oh.
Oh.
Jade’s heart skips a beat.
It’s at that moment that she also catches a glimpse of short brown hair behind the wrinkled underwear.
“Fuck!”
She covers her eyes with her hands and hides her whole body between the curtains. She can’t see this. She should close the curtains and go to sleep and not think about what is happening on the other side of the window, just forget about it and move on. Forget about her gorgeous best friend touching herself on the other side of a spotless window, fingers doing what she aches to do and isn’t allowed to.
Jade is so lonely and hasn’t been touched in so long, and while Kit isn’t the one to blame, Jade hasn’t been able to have sex with anyone else because of the scorching love she feels for her. nobody will ever live up to her, so Jade has surrendered to a sexless life.
It’s not like she has never thought about Kit when she masturbates. If she’s being totally honest with herself, she has been thinking about her for so long when doing it that she can’t even remember a time before that. Everything Kit does or says is a potential bomb ready to set Jade off. Literally.
Before she can consciously decide against it, her body moves on its own to sit on the brown armchair near the window that she has placed there to read during the winter, and snakes a hand down towards her heat. The darkness of the room hides her if Kit were to suddenly open her eyes and look towards her building, but Jade doesn’t feel threatened by it. Instead, the thought alone is enough to light a flame inside of her.
She scoots the armchair a couple of inches back, just in case. She might be horny, but she’s not stupid.
Kit’s hips thrust more vigorously as her hand picks up the pace. Jade feels her hand match the rhythm and breathing become more difficult. She needs to feel Kit’s heat, be the one to cause it and end it. She imagines herself face deep inside that heat for hours. She’d never get tired of the taste.
She is so worked up that she finishes before Kit. As pleasure ripples through her body, she drops her head back and lets a guttural moan run free. This is the moment she prefers, the after, when not even the end of the world could disrupt her peace. She lets it all out, savoring the aftershocks of the orgasm as she keeps massaging her clit.
Her heart has almost gone back to a regular rate when a cold draft brushes her ankle. Jade searches for its source and fuck, the window is half-closed. Has been the entire time.
Shit shit shit shit-
Jade rushes to close the window and the curtains, chest heaving. This is a disaster.
Has Kit heard? Probably not. Her windows are closed, and yes, sometimes Jade can hear Kit yelling over the phone with her mom or listening to some old-school vinyl, but that is different, right? Those are loud noises and she was not that loud. Wasn’t she?
She panics.
She has ruined their friendship. Now Kit will call her, or worse, will bang at her door, shouting that she needs to leave her alone, that she hates her and never wants to see her again, that she’s a freak she will never love back. Jade might not survive it.
She grips at the curtains in silence, her heartbeat so fast she can hear it drumming in her ears. She waits for the inevitable, but nothing happens.
After a few minutes, Kit turns off her light, then nothing again. No call, no shouting. Maybe nothing is worse.
——
Kit lies still on her bed, numb. Her only movement when she reaches her arm out to turn off the light switch. She is not even aware of how much time has passed when she finally scoots under the blanket.
Her mind is running too fast to catch up, and she can’t figure out how to disentangle the mess of emotions in her stomach. If she wasn’t so incapable of moving, she would throw up.
What was that? What the actual fuck was that??
She isn’t drunk, that much she is sure of. So why on Earth has she just touched herself, knowing that Jade might be on the other side of the fence, watching her?
Scratch that. She knew Jade would be watching. They wave goodnight from time to time, their windows very close together and facing each other almost perfectly. She knew Jade might walk by, and decided to masturbate anyway. Better yet, leave the light on. What is wrong with her?
She rubs her hands up and down her face to push away that annoying prickling behind her eyes that always leads to tears. She doesn’t want to lose Jade, and now, because of how horny she gets every time she sees her, she will. She should know better than to pull something crazy like this, especially because she knows that Jade doesn’t want her like that. Never has. Jade is kind and respectful and would never do that to her, so why can’t she be normal for once instead of shoving her hands inside her underwear and giving a show? Ugh.
She hates this. She wishes she could just tell Jade how she feels, but she can’t. Jade will run away, and maybe she should. Kit is a freak. Kit is a freak who doesn’t know boundaries and has ruined the only good thing in her life because she can’t stop craving Jade like that.
Except...
Except she is almost certain she has heard Jade – or better, a cry. A moan, perhaps. Something guttural, visceral; something that has lasted for a few seconds, and that Kit can’t erase from her mind. It sounded like her friend.
She tries to come up with a million excuses for it, what it is (definitely not a sex moan), how it has happened (Jade was just having a snack), and why it has happened (ketchup on avocado is her favorite). Nothing makes sense, aside from what deep down she feels to be true: that it is, indeed, a sex moan.
Has Jade seen her? Has she... watched? And if so, she must have enjoyed it because, well... The moan.
A single pulse shocks Kit between her legs. Kit won’t admit it aloud, but in the darkness of her room she can be more honest with herself: the thought of Jade watching her masturbating, being so aroused by that that she also masturbates in response, is exciting. She sucks her bottom lip, savoring the idea of doing it again, just to test the waters, to check if Jade was really watching her this time, and if she would watch her again.
After a sleepless night, Kit decides not to mention anything of what has happened to anyone, Jade included. She is half worried she might be making it all up and half scared of what would happen if she did bring it up to Jade. She walks on eggshells all week with her friend, their texts getting more vague and their calls more sporadic.
Jade doesn’t mention anything either, and if she is a bit more flustered than usual when her eyes meet Kit’s, Kit pretends not to notice.
——
The following Friday arrives sooner than expected, and Jade hasn’t been able to think about anything else but what has happened last Friday. While she is at Kit’s for their usual night together, she can’t keep her bouncy legs still and has to ask Kit to rewind a movie scene more times than she’d like to admit, her brain fixated on one thing only. She almost chokes when she hears the ridiculously hot moan Kit lets out as she takes a bite of her slice of pizza. As if all that wasn’t enough, she also drops the scissors and almost stabs herself in the foot while she’s fixing Kit’s haircut. When Kit asks her to stay for a sleepover, Jade pretends to have eaten too much pizza and needing some meds at her place. The truth is, she’s not sure she would be able to fall asleep in the same bed where one week ago she has witnessed the most life-changing thing of all.
She rushes home, tiptoeing inside her bedroom and wondering if something will happen tonight too. The lights on the other side of the fence are off, and she sighs in relief. There might be some bitterness in there too, but if there is, she doesn’t want to acknowledge it.
Just as she’s turning around to go to bed, she catches a movement out of the corner of her eye. She stills, waiting. What she is waiting for, it’s not clear. Does she want to see Kit walk by the window and go to sleep, the incident of the previous week just a thing of the past, or does she want to see Kit slide a hand down her body, do to herself what Jade desperately wants to do to her with her own hands?
Just like the previous Friday, Jade sits in the armchair and patiently watches as Kit turns on the light and sits at the edge of her bed. She seems to stare out of the window for a moment, but her eyes aren’t focused on anything specific. Aren’t focused on Jade, hidden in the shadows of her own room.
Then, Kit lies down, knees pointing towards Jade, and glides her hands up and down her own body mindlessly, more like a self-discovery than something sexual. She takes her time, her hands languid and feathery at first, then growing more and more confident, moving to more strategic areas.
Jade studies the way Kit’s neck beams with sweat under the artificial light, and when Kit takes her pjs off and remains in her baby blue underwear, she notices a darker stain right at the center of the fabric. It’s like that tempting wetness is calling for her tongue, and Jade would be more than glad to answer the call. Her mouth starts salivating.
Kit plays with her nipples for a while, her pink areolas smaller than Jade’s, and keeps rubbing her thighs together to avoid touching where Jade knows she needs it most. She can see that ache all over her face, feels it too, but Kit seems determined to push against the desire, perhaps to extend her orgasm. Jade finds it incredibly sexy.
A desperate need to touch herself arises in Jade, and this time she doesn’t hold back. She kneads her breast, then sucks on her index finger before drawing small circles around her clit with it. Just like she has done thousands of times before, she imagines herself standing on top of Kit, kissing her, loving her, making her scream of pleasure. There is nothing she wants more in life.
Checking with the corner of her eye that the window is closed this time, Jade lets herself groan loudly. When she reopens her eyes, Kit is pulling herself up to remove her underwear, then lies back down and spreads her legs wide open.
Jade swallows.
Wow.
Her hand stops rubbing, her brain lost in the sight of heaven, and all Jade wants is to kneel down and worship her new God. She watches as Kit teases her entrance, wetting her finger. When she finally slides inside, her back arching off the bed and nipples perking up, Jade swears she can feel the wet warmth around her own finger.
She marvels at the way Kit moves her wrist, tries to impress the movements in her mind, and copies them with her own hand. Her walls tighten when she adds a second finger, and she rides down on her hand pretending that it’s Kit who is causing all that sticky mess. In a way, she is the cause.
She squeezes her left boob, nails digging inside the soft skin. She wants to leave a mark to remind herself when she wakes up tomorrow that tonight was not a dream, that she is seeing a naked Kit giving herself pleasure like her life depends on it.
She lifts her body up, just a little, then sinks down onto her fingers. She does it a second time, then a third. She doesn’t even have to reach number ten when she comes, her climax powerful enough to make her knee buckle while sitting.
Kit comes fast not even a minute after, her whole body rocking to an irregular melody she yearns to hear.
Jade keeps her fingers inside of her after her muscles relax, and Kit does the same. She waits for Kit to do something, but again, she lies still in her own room, too tired to move. She looks peaceful, and Jade doesn’t want to break the spell. Another Friday where their rules have changed completely, and Jade wonders if their friendship will survive this when they will inevitably reach the turning point. She hopes it will evolve into something deeper and better.
When her legs finally seem to hold her body’s weight for the few steps that separate the armchair from the bed, Jade takes off her sweaty tank top and crawls naked inside her bed, leaving Kit to pull herself back together on her own terms.
Moments before falling asleep, as her eyelids fight to stay open but fail, Jade sees that the light in Kit’s room is still on.
——
Jade should stop this madness before it gets out of hand, but she Can’t. Stop. Watching.
It happens again the following Friday, and Jade thinks this may be becoming a habit. She is certainly making a habit out of it, armchair and all.
This time it’s Kit that cuts their evening together short, mentioning some call with her mom that cannot be skipped. If it weren’t for her aloof eyes that she tries to hide from her best friend, Jade would say it is an excuse to kick her out, but she knows her better than that. Those sad eyes always mean Sorsha time, and Sorsha time is imperative.
Back at her apartment, Jade feels a little disappointed that she won’t get her sweet goodnight she has come to crave so much. She wants Kit so bad and hates what she is doing, yet she can’t pull away from that window and its breathtaking view. She gets to witness Mother Nature in her fullness spread open in front of her, give herself to this primordial energy that overtakes and frees her. A raw vulnerability that could make Jade cry in fascination if she wasn’t so turned on by it. She wishes she could stop time and memorize every second of it, every strand of hair falling wildly and every little whimper that forms a beautiful song on Kit’s lips.
Oh, Kit’s lips. Jade wishes she could feel those most of all. Feel them just once. See how they fit into hers, how they would taste. She would be okay with dying after that.
Despite the chilly air inside her house, Jade’s cheeks are burning. She takes a long shower to cool down, forcing her mind to get rid of the desire to watch Kit again.
She succeeds, probably. Mostly. The desire is still far away when, almost an hour after coming home, she sits in the armchair and waits. Even further when Kit appears inside her room and grabs a purple dildo from a box underneath her bed. So so far away when Kit gets rid of her shorts and underwear in a single move. Really, no desire at all.
To nobody’s surprise, Jade’s hand finds a pool of wetness on her cunt. She goes straight to slipping one finger inside of her, no time for niceties. This whole circus has made her hornier than usual, her every waking moment spent thinking about Kit, Kit, Kit.
Naked Kit.
Moaning Kit.
Breathless Kit.
Drowning-in-her-own-climax Kit.
With everything she does, she thinks of having sex with Kit, and no place is safe inside her mind. So when Friday night comes around, she is already reaching her limit and her whole body aches for the release she prays Kit will concede to her.
Kit doesn’t seem to have time for niceties either as she swiftly slides the dildo inside of her, her whole body tensing at the friction. The glistening cock hypnotizes Jade as it disappears inside Kit’s cunt and reappears each time wetter than before. She hates how jealous she is of an inanimate object right now.
Once Kit’s pace becomes more erratic, signaling that she is approaching her peak, Jade catches a small movement on Kit’s lips that will drive her even crazier for the days to come. Their windows keep them farther than she would like, so really it might all in her head, but Jade is almost sure she catches Kit say ‘Jade’ a few times before going rigid from the intensity of her orgasm.
——
Kit is in a worse mood than usual when her boss organizes a last-minute trip to Galladoorn for the following week. She hates being away from her routine, the comfort of her home, and Jade. Jade, who has inhabited her every thought since that first maddening moan she has heard weeks before.
After three long days of meetings and three even longer nights alone in her hotel room, what seems like a brilliant idea comes to her in her sleep. The next morning, she is already up at 7 am to go to the store and get what she needs. It’s a great plan and she can’t wait to play it out for Jade.
However, her initial confidence wears out as she returns home in Tir Asleen. The long-awaited Friday comes along and Kit curses herself for having made the wrong call. She nervously rings Jade’s doorbell, praying that the cake she has ordered from the new bakery downtown is tasty. She needs today to be perfect. It is Jade’s birthday today, and she deserves nothing less than perfect.
The guests for the birthday party start arriving after an hour of decorating the place, and soon everybody is having fun. Kit downs a couple of shots of liquid courage, feels Jade’s eyes on her the entire time. She desperately wants to show her her surprise, but she needs to be patient and wait for everybody to leave.
It is almost midnight when Kit finally says her goodbye and sprints back home. Jade lets her off easily, and it would be surprising if it weren’t for the fact that it’s Friday. They both feel the electricity in the air at the thought of what’s to come.
She eagerly walks into her own bedroom and waits by the window for a sign of a movement inside the bedroom on the other side of the fence. When she notices what might be Jade’s legs walking, she waves hello and points at her own lamp, a request to turn on her light. Jade does as she’s asked and her eyes lock in with Kit’s, a questioning smile on her lips.
Kit doesn’t want to waste time explaining, doesn’t feel the need to. Jade is smart, she will get the message once she sees what Kit has prepared. She tugs at her black hoodie and takes it off, then her pants. She’s careful with every inch of skin she reveals, so slow with it too. She wants to be a present to Jade, and like a present she lets herself be unwrapped.
Shame put aside completely, Kit holds Jade’s gaze with hunger and lets her take in the surprise – a black laced two-piece lingerie that leaves very little to the imagination. Kit is proud of how it looks on her, how it hugs her curves and makes her milky complexion even more inviting.
Jade’s mouth drops open.
Filled with pride at the reaction she has caused, Kit mouths two simple words, exaggerating the movements of her lips to avoid any misunderstanding: ‘join me’.
Behind her own window, Jade’s eyes widen in shock. Kit doesn’t want her to feel scared or pull back, not now that she is risking all their years of friendship for what might be a better future together. She wants this, and hopes Jade wants it too.
She nods delicately but firmly, trying her best to convey how desperate she is with her eyes. She must succeed though, because the next thing she knows is that Jade is standing on Kit’s doorstep with no shoes on.
——
“Kit, what’s going on?” She asks, and she’s not faking it. Jade is genuinely confused as to why her best friend has just undressed before her and is now wearing a bra that no doubt will haunt her dirtiest, wettest dreams for the rest of her life.
Kit gestures towards the forest green chaise longue on one side of the room to invite Jade to sit there. She smiles, and Jade feels that she can trust her with whatever plan she has going on in her mind. “We can talk later. Now just- Stay there and watch.”
Jade complies. She has always been a rule follower, after all.
Kit is uncharacteristically quiet, but it’s not awkward. It’s like she is concentrating on what to do next, like there is a point to all of this and Jade simply hasn’t caught up yet.
When Kit starts caressing her own breast, nipples already hard and peeking through the see-through lace, Jade’s throat goes dry. Everything Kit does is sexy, but this? This is another level. This Kit is sinfully playful. All of this is on display for Jade, a show by a skilled artist for their number one fan. Kit enjoys showing off for Jade, revels in turning her on, takes pleasure off it.
Jade’s languid eyes follow Kit’s strong hands up and down her porcelain body, how they sneak their way under the bra to torture her nipples, how they lower the strap of the bra to leave her left breast completely exposed for Jade, how they scratch her belly and leave red marks that disappear frankly too quickly.
Kit takes a step back to settle onto her bed, one leg propped up onto the mattress as she moves the lace of her underwear a little to the left, exposing her cunt for Jade. A throbbing ache spreads between Jade’s legs. Jade wants to bite her, bites her own lip instead and tastes a little blood. She knows she’s wet too.
“Please, Kit... Can I...” She begs.
Kit nods, and Jade snakes her hand inside her pants to get to work. She is so sensitive and the touch so delightful, and Kit is so gorgeous as she rubs her clit with two fingers. Their gazes meet, and neither dares to look away, the panting and the moaning that escape freely the only sounds in the room.
Jade thinks back to the party earlier, how Kit had been wearing that black lingerie underwear underneath her clothes the whole time, a single layer of cotton separating her hand from the clasps of that bra. Her finger moves faster and angrier on her sex. She cannot hold it in much longer. She needs Kit now.
As if she reads her mind, Kit breathes more and more desperately, her hips rocking frantically and out of rhythm in search for the final friction that will send her over the edge.
The dirtiest moans fill the room as they come a few seconds away from each other. Jade’s vision fades to black, and for a moment, her heart stills and her lungs receive no oxygen. If she were to die right now, she’d go happily. She tries to come back to planet Earth, but her mind is hazy and no coherent words come to her.
She can’t remember an orgasm that strong in ages.
“Wow.”
“Yeah.”
They stare at each other for a long moment, their eyes saying what their lips are still too afraid to say. It’s becoming easier to be vulnerable with Kit, Jade thinks. All these layers that she has peeled away tonight... Maybe they are finally reaching their cores, where their deepest feelings and unspoken words reside.
Jade wants to say it.
She still doesn’t know how.
She wants to try to express it. Perhaps it’s better, for now. She’ll find the words later.
She walks up to Kit who is still on her bed looking all sweaty and perfect. Kneeling down, Jade rests both hands on each side of Kit’s hips, and the feeling of her warm skin and thin lace mixing under her palms is so new but welcome all the same.
“Can we do this again, together this time?”
Suddenly, Kit is kissing her. Kit is kissing her and Jade is kissing her back with no intention of pulling away anytime soon. Her lips are so juicy and soft as they lock with Jade’s, and her tongue is eager to explore all the corners of Jade’s mouth. Jade lets her and fuck, she’s the luckiest woman alive right now.
Kit shivers as Jade tentatively dances her hands over Kit’s black panties. Seeing the way she is crumbling under Jade’s touch already feels intoxicating, and it’s only their first time together. She loves Kit so desperately, and it’s ridiculous to think how overwhelming it all is. There was no life before her, and there could never be one after. She needs her in every way possible – spiritually and carnally.
After she gets rid of Kit’s panties (she throws them away and they land on Kit’s lamp, but that’s a problem for tomorrow), Jade is entranced by the tempting white slick peeking through the hole.
Looking up at Kit to search for any sign of hesitation, she sees none.
“Touch me,” Kit says with a whimper.
Jade looks back at the entrance in front of her face and feels the urge to sink two fingers inside of it. She does, and Kit becomes clay in her hands.
Two fingers soon become three at Kit’s request.
Kit’s cunt is so wet that it squelches loudly under Jade’s thrusts. Jade is so turned on by it that she could probably come just by listening to it. She tries to memorize it, her ear so close to the source of the sound as she bites and kisses her inner thighs.
As Kit clenches hard around Jade’s fingers, Jade closes her eyes for a second. She imagines what it would be like to be trapped there forever, to never know another feeling around her skin that isn’t the warm, wet walls of her lover. She groans at the thought and keeps thrusting into Kit as she helps her reach her second orgasm of the night, grateful that this time she can do more than just watch. She gets to enjoy her, feel her, maybe taste her too later, after Kit has regained her strength and is ready for round three.
Kit is gasping for air. “Fuck Jay, this was insane.”
“You are insane.”
Kit blinks up at her, her eyes searching for something that Jade is almost certain it’s the words she feels building up inside of her every time she sees Kit, the words she wants to say out loud more than anything but is terribly afraid to. She sees that same fear in the big, doe eyes in front of her, and so she decides to take that step first. She’s not sure Kit will follow her lead and say those words back right now – life hasn’t been kind to Kit and her scars run deep –, but she knows she means it all the same. She doesn’t need to hear them to know it’s true.
“I love you, Kit. Totally, ridiculously, desperately.”
Her heart is leaping outside of her chest, finally this weight has been lifted from her. There is only one millisecond where Jade is scared she might have gone too far, said too much, but then Kit smiles, and nothing else matters. She loves her back. She might not say it yet, but Jade knows she does. Jade can wait, they have all the time in the world now.
“Come back up here and kiss me,” Kit says, and it could be an order if Jade weren’t already climbing up the bed, eager for another kiss.
And again, Jade complies.