Chapter Text
It all started with a mere smile.
It was a miserable time being a university student. Rin had high expectations for himself and that caused him to burnout too quickly. On top of that, he had his shitty part-time job at a convenience store so he had to deal with irritating customers all the time. Too many giggly high school girls came in to ask for help finding something even though they were regulars and too many of them wanted to start conversations though all Rin wanted was to work.
He had just finished one shift and was heading to his and his brother’s apartment. After a day of work, he dreaded the evening rush hour at the station. He didn’t really need the money as their parents paid for most of their expenses but he was forced to in order to ‘build character’ and learn about the working world. His brother told him that it would benefit him to fix his unfriendly face before going into the workforce (though he definitely should take his own stupid advice).
So Rin had to suffer.
The train station looked as busy as ever and he hadn’t even gotten in the building yet. There was a crowd in front that obstructed the entry, irritating Rin more. They must be some buskers but it was a surprisingly large crowd filled with young girls.
Music began playing and Rin was ready to pull out his earbuds from his pocket so he wouldn’t have to listen even with the short walk. However, he didn’t feel the need to. The song was surprisingly catchy, seeping into his eardrums, and the voices weren’t…bad. Not that annoying at least and could carry a tune. There were multiple voices, all male, so it must have been a new boy group that was trying to make it big.
Curiosity got the best of him. If the music wasn’t bad then Rin could at least check them out.
He walked towards the crowd, craning his neck above to try to see the performers. As they were mainly short young girls, Rin had the advantage of height.
In the centre were four boys. Young men? The one in orange was muscular and didn’t look under twenty. There was one in pink with long hair and feminine features and made Rin question their sex. The third one was in yellow and he practically acted like a kid with his various facial expressions that changed from something normal to something abnormal.
Then the last guy.
It was stupid that his colour was this bright lime green when there was nothing about him that indicated it should be such. The other three had their colours match their hair and eyes but this guy had blue eyes . Even from a distance, Rin could tell how deep the colour was. They shone brightly in the sunlight as he looked in the crowd and they were so intimately expressive, the enchanting smile causing something to jump up in Rin’s throat from his chest, completely captivating him.
Captivate?
Rin scowled.
As if.
They sung a song and danced, the crowd taking videos and pictures. It was quite clear that compared to the others, the green one didn’t have as much presence. The pink one took the lead in the song, the yellow one took the lead in hyping up the audience and the orange one…just was this hulking guy that caught everyone’s attention.
And yet, Rin’s eyes were on the green one.
He didn’t stand out and was relatively normal compared to the others, yet he couldn’t look away. Something about him caught his attention. Maybe it was the subtlety of his expression; his focus and care with every move; how he seemed to know how to let the others shine when he could be the one taking the spotlight.
Rin wanted to see him under that spotlight.
“Thank you for watching our street performance for EGOISM.” A young woman with short brown hair in a business suit greeted with a smile. Her arms were full of flyers and she held one out to Rin. “They’re a brand new group from Blue Lock Productions so I hope you’ll support their growth as they aim to become the best in Japan!”
Rin took the flyer without a response but the woman didn’t seem to mind, moving onto the next person. He looked down at it, the picture of the group presented with the SNS of each member as well as the company’s.
Isagi Yoichi.
That was the green one’s name. He was focused on his face, his smile, his blue eyes. He read the information for his social media, making a mental note to download the app later and to make an account.
When he realized what he was thinking, he stopped and angrily stuffed the flyer in his pocket and made his way to the train station once more. He resisted the urge to turn back, distantly hearing the singing from the speakers.
It was absolutely ridiculous. Download an app? Make an account? Was his brain telling him to follow this guy’s SNS? For what reason? He was just some presenceless guy in a newbie boy band, someone hardly worth looking at. At the rate that he was going, he wouldn’t be successful. He would quit from the pressure and the group would replace him with someone else, someone with an actual matching colour scheme rather than his blue and lime green.
Rin had reached the ticket when he stopped, something bugging him inside. He clicked his tongue then turned on his heel, almost hitting someone as he ran back. He was able to catch the end of the song and watched as the group got into their final poses, the pink one (cutting horse? Was that the name? It was a weird name.) at the front. The gaggle of giggly girls cheered and clapped but Rin didn’t.
Isagi was off to the side and despite not being in the limelight, he was smiling brightly, bowing and waving at the crowd just like the others. His eyes sparkled in the sunlight and his cheeks were flushed pink.
Stunning.
Rin bit his lower lip, inwardly sighing reluctantly.
He was doomed.
2 years later
The lights were bright, the crowd was screaming, and Rin’s memory could recall every detail.
The EGOISM concert from the past two days haunted him even as he was dragging himself at work. It was the only thing that made his week, let alone month, at this point. Now that it was over, he just wanted to die and not wake up until the next concert.
But no, he had to work.
It was a late shift too. In order to make sure he had the weekend free so he could attend both concert days, he had to exchange with his co-workers and the only ones that could were those with night shifts. Rin would do anything for those concerts so exchanged them without hesitation, forgoing his usual studying during those times.
It was all for Yoichi after all.
Sacrificing a few hours of studying was nothing if he got to see EGOISM’s concerts and see Yoichi live. Of course, he had gone to all of the concerts already the past two years but it was always better each time. Yoichi improved every time; his dance flowed seamlessly, his vocal range had gotten larger, and his presence was overwhelming, the spotlight lingering on him more and more, exactly as Rin wanted.
The one thing that didn’t change was his expression: sweet, genuine, and beautiful. Rin could tell that he loved what he did and loved the fans just as much, his smile showing pure happiness and he had no choice but to support him.
But Rin wasn’t the only one that noticed the change.
As EGOISM became more popular in the past few years, so did Yoichi’s popularity. At the beginning, Rin didn’t have much trouble trading Bachira’s merch for Yoichi’s, but now that he had a boom in popularity, people were also looking for his stuff.
It was both frustrating but pleasing. He was more popular but the prices for his can badges were skyrocketing to at least ten thousand yen a piece.
Rin needed to get more work shifts.
He stopped sulking over being at work, now motivated. He needed all the money he could get to pay for his merch. He wasn’t lucky enough to get enough trades from the concerts the last couple of days. His new Yoichi itabag still needed another row of can badges for it to be considered complete.
After the initial rush of businessmen finishing for the night, grabbing the readymade meals, not a lot of people came in. It was Monday night so people still had school and work the next day so it was relatively peaceful. Rin went to the photocopier to see if they needed to restock on paper when someone came in with a mask and a hat.
Rin eyed him carefully but continued doing his work. As he was the only one there at the moment, he had to make sure nobody stole in front of him. There was no way he was going to lose the extra pay for the night shift when he had to hunt for all those can badges online at exorbitant second-hand prices.
Another man entered also dressed in a mask and hat, hoodie over his head. Of course, when it was late at night, there were bound to be a lot of suspicious people around. The security cameras in the store were working so in case something happened, he knew he wouldn’t be blamed for it. He still had to be cautious though.
He went to the back and got a box of items he needed to restock. The two customers were still there as he went to the fridge to refill drinks. He noticed that the first customer that came in was hovering near him looking at the bread behind. Rin ignored him and continued working, but every time he moved to a new area, the first customer would try to be in his general vicinity.
And the second customer would be lingering as well. He wasn’t right next to the first customer but he was at an angle where he could see him.
Rin narrowed his eyes.
Why did there have to be weirdos when he had a shift?
The first customer kept looking back at where the second one was, hands fidgeting at his side. It seemed like he was getting nervous with the second customer and Rin wondered if they were going to cause trouble any time soon.
“Excuse me,” Rin began quietly, causing the first customer to look up at him. He didn’t need any problems so he might as well get it over with before they actually start. “Do you need any assistance?”
The convenience store wasn’t that big so it was easy to find what they wanted. However, the two customers had been in there for far too long considering they haven’t picked up anything to buy yet.
“Uh, yes. Um…” His voice seemed vaguely familiar but his stuttering was making it difficult. “I’m here for my interview!”
Rin blinked in confusion.
“What?”
“You were looking for a new part-time worker, right? I applied and I have an interview.” The customer gave a nervous laugh as he glanced to the side. “Sorry for not saying anything. I was a little early for it and I didn’t want to bother.”
Rin could see the second customer shift, trying to listen into the conversation. He glanced down at the first customer, his hands in front of him, fidgeting and trembling.
Oh.
He grimaced.
It just had to be his shift.
“Right, the interview.” Rin would feel like shit if he didn’t help when he saw how scared this guy was. He had to go with the lie for now. “You’re…Asano, right?”
“Yes!” The man nodded, eyes lighting up, catching Rin off guard. There was something dazzling about them that made him hold his breath. “I’m Asano. So, uh, it’s time for the interview, right?”
Rin nodded. “Yeah. Follow me.”
He opened up the counter and headed to the staff room with the young man trailing behind. He glanced back and saw the second customer watching them leave before he shut the door behind them. Rin gestured to one of the chairs for the young man to sit and went to the minifridge where he had a bottle of barley tea saved for later. He handed it to him.
“Thank you.” The young man sighed in relief, accepting the tea. He opened it and when he removed his mask to take a drink, Rin nearly shit his pants.
It was Isagi Yoichi.
So Rin suspected correctly that the guy outside was a stalker. He could quite possibly be a ‘fan’ now that he knew who he was dealing with. Even if he was a ‘fan’, what a fucking dick to follow him like. Clearly, Yoichi felt uncomfortable and no true fan would want their favourite to feel that. Rin might as well go out and punch the guy.
But at the same time, why didn’t Yoichi say anything? Why didn’t he call the police or his manager or someone for help? He was highly aware of his kindness and generosity based on the variety shows he had appeared on and his interviews in magazines he had pored over, but something like this was inexcusable.
“Are you really that stupid?” Rin said with a click of his tongue. It was so frustrating that he didn’t even do something and let that guy follow him for so long in the store. Who knew how long he had been following beforehand? “That guy could be a killer for all we know.”
“I-I’m sure he didn’t mean anything bad.” Yoichi replied in surprise. “I mean, he didn’t do anything to me.”
“Just because he didn’t do anything to you now doesn’t mean that he wouldn’t have.” Rin retorted. Why was Yoichi even defending this guy? Was it because he thought he was a fan? What if he wasn’t a fan and just some weirdo instead?
“And if he did, I could’ve handled it myself!”
“Yeah, right. As if you weren’t scared.”
He had seen him fidget; he had seen him tremble. His usual beautiful voice was clouded with fear, stuttering, wanting to get away from that guy. Rin felt such immense anger because no way should Yoichi ever go through that.
“I-I wasn’t scared!”
“Then you wouldn’t have lied about the interview and followed me back here.” Rin pointed out. It was cute that he was trying to be brave but Rin had seen him fidget; he had seen him tremble. His usual beautiful voice was clouded with fear, stuttering, wanting to get away from that guy. Rin felt such immense anger because no way should Yoichi ever go through that.
“Stop lying.”
“What’s wrong with you?!” Yoichi yelled, getting up from his seat. “I said I was fine and I could handle it on my own but you’re just trying to force me to say otherwise! Do you have to push to be right?! Are you trying to pick a fight?!”
Rin stared in shock not understanding why Yoichi was so angry. He wasn’t trying to pick a fight? He was just concerned. He didn’t want to wake up the next morning to see his favourite on the news in the hospital or dead! Yoichi had to take care of himself properly especially since he was definitely not acting like everything was fine.
“Forget it.” Yoichi said with a shake of his head. He took the barley tea and nodded in acknowledgement. “Thanks for your help, I guess. If we ever run across each other again, I won’t bother you so you don’t need to reach out.”
“I—”
Before Rin could say anything, Yoichi had walked out. Rin blinked in confusion, stunned, not knowing what just happened. He stood there for a few more seconds before remembering that the stalker was still outside and quickly rushed out, not seeing him or Yoichi anywhere. He checked outside the store as well and only saw late night stragglers.
“Shit.” He cursed aloud, running a hand through his hair.
Where had they gone? Did the stalker still hang around or did he leave? Did he wait for Yoichi to come out? Was he safe? Rin couldn’t stop panicking and quickly grabbed his phone out of his back pocket, opening the T app to see if Yoichi had made any posts.
About thirty minutes later his phone went off with a notification from Yoichi’s account, posting about playing video games with the other EGOISM members. The last half an hour had been a rollercoaster of emotions for Rin and he finally felt like he could breathe, knowing that Yoichi was safe and with people he trusted. The last hour or so didn’t feel real and now that he was alone and had a moment to relax, it was all settling in.
He got a chance to talk to him. Sure, there were handshake events where he managed to shake his hand and talk for the twelve seconds he had with him but it didn’t go long. This was the first time he had an actual conversation with him.
And he messed it up somehow.
The stress of the stalker situation really got to him. He was just so angry that Yoichi was being stalked in the first place and how it was affecting him. He was already in a bad state emotionally and somehow, Rin made it worse. What did he say? Was it that bad? Everything was the truth as far as he could remember.
But still, he made Yoichi angry at him.
No one was in the shop so Rin took a moment to squat down, leaning his head against the counter, panicking inside.
He had really fucked up.