Chapter Text
“Sometimes I think about how I would repay you,” Regulus mused, playing with the waistband of Remus's trousers, nuzzling against his neck.
They were standing in an alley near the werewolf pack that Dumbledore had sent Remus to, and he was still off-kilter by the incredibly unlikely turn of events that had led him to where he was. Namely, with Regulus Black pressed against him, having just kissed him and sucked a mark into his neck.
“But then I remember. You're just a poor, half-blood, half-bleed. Not really worthy of my time,” Regulus finished, his words cruel.
Remus grabbed Regulus’s jaw, hooking his thumb over his teeth, pressing his tongue with the pad, yanking his mouth open. This made the Black heir’s eyes flutter closed, he moaned, and Remus felt something like disgust.
His beautiful, untouchable Regulus had gotten himself high to throw himself at the likes of Rosier and Lestrange. Still looking down on Remus.
Something snapped inside of him. He didn’t want to be a monster, but fuck it, why keep pretending? When he was stuck starving and snarling with the feral fucking wolves that fancied themselves as Voldemort’s pets, as if the Dark Lord would treat them any better. Then, at least the Dark Lord offered something resembling promises. Unlike the goddamned Ministry, which offered nothing.
Once again, he was isolated from civilized human beings. This time, though, he was also rejected and mistrusted by his own kind. Some stupid part of him had thought (feared, hoped) that he would fit in with other werewolves. That it would be proof he wasn't a normal person.
Instead, they distrusted him about as much as anyone else. It was obvious he had been around wixen, and they hated him for it. Hated that he'd gone to Hogwarts. Even the monsters rejected him.
Bile rose in his throat, the reminder that even if they ‘won’, Remus would be cursed to a half life in the shadows - and now Regulus fucking Black was screwing with him.
“You think I want anything from you?” Remus sneered, disarming Regulus and grabbing his wrists roughly. The slim man's eyes widened and he swayed unsteadily. Fucking Sweet Delights, wizarding drugs, how many had he even taken? Why didn't Remus care?
“Look at you, prissy little slut,” he turned Regulus around and shoved him against the stone wall that Regulus had pushed Remus against. Proper pureblood that he was, he had on robes without trousers. It was all too easy. “Always ready for it, aren't you? Bend over and spread your legs for anyone, won't you?”
“Wh- what?” Regulus said, sounding disoriented and lost.
Remus ignored it, throwing up a few privacy spells and a hearty Notice-Me-Not before pulling Regulus’s robe up, exposing those beautiful, milky thighs to the air. He had a small amount of body hair, but the black showed up starkly. A few moles dotted the surface as well. Remus could have spent a lifetime exploring and documenting every inch of him.
Instead, he was destroying himself on a horrible mission, losing his friends, and in no fucking mood to be teased by a spoiled brat.
He slapped Regulus’s arse, once, just to see the effect it would have. The flesh jiggled delightfully, a beautiful red mark marred the alabaster flesh, and Regulus moaned and thrust his hips.
“Of course you'd like that,” Remus muttered, shaking his head, he pressed a hand between the cleft of Regulus’s arse, relieved that it hadn't been prepared. Not that it meant much for a wizard, but if Regulus had been walking around wet and loose–
He wasn't, though, so Remus muttered a wandless lubrication spell, expertly teasing his hole open while Regulus writhed and moaned and gasped.
“Wh- what are you doing?” Regulus asked shakily.
“Want me to stop?” Remus asked, pressing his fingers against the sensitive bundle of nerves inside him then taking his fingers away. He wondered what would happen if Regulus told him to stop, if Remus had managed to be that far gone. He doubted it, though, was pretty sure he'd just drop the man and walk away. That counted for something. Probably.
“Don't stop,” Regulus whimpered, pushing his hips back, chasing the sensation that had just been ripped out of him.
Remus smirked, tempted to make him beg, but he really didn't care enough to bother right now. Instead, half the tension he was carrying unspooled at the permission, and he let himself be enveloped by the moment. Nothing existed outside the sound of Regulus’s moans, the smell of his arousal and cologne and smoke, the feeling of his body clenching around Remus’s fingers.
Too soon, he was crying out and cumming, his untouched cock emptying itself against the inside of his robes. He was still shoved up against the rough, brick wall. Remus couldn't really see his face, and was distantly aware that his younger self would have died to document Regulus’s face during orgasm.
Tonight… Remus didn't even know what he was doing. Following some instinct he would probably hate himself for in the morning.
He had a long list of things he hated himself for right now. This one could get in line.
Once Regulus’s orgasm finished, his body went limp. Remus did not stop. He had slowed his rhythm, worked him through it gently. Now he was building up again. Too soon, the once pleasurable feelings would become punishing in the oversensitivity.
“It– it’s too much! I can’t–” Regulus shouted, wriggling against him.
“Yes you can,” Remus smirked, then leaned forward, purring directly into his ear, “You were planning on letting them both take you, weren’t you? What’s the difference? Or are you telling me they’re so pathetic they can’t even get you off?”
Regulus let out a sob, shaking his head, and Remus wasn’t even sure what he was objecting to. The treatment? The suggestion that Regulus was going to let those two fuck him? The aspersion against his fellow Death Eaters’ prowess? It didn’t really matter, did it?
“No, of course not, you’re such a cockslut that I’m sure you’d cum as soon as you got a cocked shoved into your dripping wet hole,” Remus growled, and Regulus was beyond words, “That why you signed up, isn't it? Wanting to be Voldemort’s personal cum dump.”
Regulus yelped at the name.
“Walk around full of precious pureblood jizz, leaking down your legs. Bet you wish you had a proper cunt, so they could knock you up, carry their precious heirs, Toujurs Pur,” Remus purred as Regulus continued fucking back against his fingers, sobbing, trembling, working closer to his second release.
Tomorrow morning, Remus would look back and wonder what demon possessed his tongue. Tonight, he continued finger fucking Regulus and unleashing every resentful, dark feeling he'd ever had.
Regulus came again with a tortured wail, and Remus finally relented. He cast a soothing charm on his abused hole, and Regulus trembled and sank down to his knees. Remus crouched down next to him, pulled out a bit of chocolate that he always kept on hand. It was nowhere near the quality Regulus was used to, and it was a luxury precious to Remus.
With a grimace, he broke a piece off and pushed it into Regulus's mouth, holding it in place on his tongue as it slowly melted and some of the focus came back into the grey eyes.
“Nice seeing you again, Black,” Remus muttered, patting him on the back and dropping Regulus's wand on the ground before stalking away.
—
‘Playing nice won't get you what you want.’
Regulus had told him that, back when they were still in school, right before Remus had ended up kissing him. The words had bounced around in his head since, and hearing them again brought with it a strange sense of deja vu.
Sometimes he fancied it as a request, as permission, as an instruction. Then he scolded himself, falling back into his typical spiral of feeling like a monster and horrible person.
That night, when Regulus had been high and pushed Remus against the wall and kissed him, he had said it again. When the words were accompanied by fingers playing with his waistband and kisses, well, it was hard not to imagine they were instructional.
The only problem was, what Remus wanted was to be nice. He wanted to worship Regulus as if he were an altar, seek Regulus’s release with his tongue as if it were communion, be baptized in the sounds of his pleasure.
Treating Regulus the way he had, it had disgusted him. If that was all Regulus would ever give him… Well, he would take it. Remus didn’t exactly have the luxury of choice in such things, and the truth was that he would happily be Regulus’s mindless slave if the man only asked. But Remus hated it. Hated himself for it. Hated Regulus for it.
Then, Remus had long ago accepted that he was never going to get what he wanted.
—
A few days later, Remus was again walking back at the end of his shift and found Regulus standing at the same alley that Remus had found him in the first time.
It was a problem. Regulus not only knew Remus was stationed there but seemed to know Remus’s schedule. Increased Death Eater activity. He knew what he was supposed to do.
He did disarm Regulus as soon as he saw him, at least, he could pretend that training was still being followed. He wasn't sure if Regulus was going along with it or if he was just that high. Once again, Remus could not find himself to care.
The same demon took him over and this time Remus went more willingly. He ended up standing behind Regulus, his hip shoved against Regulus’s arse so Remus’s erection was nowhere near him. Apparently that was the line he wouldn't cross. He would kiss and touch Regulus but wouldn't let himself get off.
At least there was still a line.
Both of his arms were wrapped around Regulus, one gripping his hands tight to Regulus’s own chest, the other working his cock roughly. As before, the cruelest and filthiest insults fell from his lips, purred into Regulus’s ears as the man came undone. This time he stopped after Regulus came the first time, and didn’t bother with the chocolate.
The self loathing was starting to overpower any positive feelings he might have, he wanted to leave.
“Why–” Regulus panted, slumping against the wall and staring at Remus, “Why aren’t you fucking me? Why are you just–” he shook his head and closed his eyes.
Remus smirked, leaning close, nuzzling his cheek, “Oh, Starshine. Do you really think you've been good enough to deserve my cock?”
He left before he could find out how Regulus was going to respond to that question.
—
The third time that he ran into Regulus on the way home from his work shift, Remus knew that he really should find out how Regulus knew his schedule. That was the sort of thing he was supposed to report to the Order. Unfortunately, they were facing a cold snap, the October air going frigid. The people he lived with were worrying about how they’d make it through the winter. They were going to get desperate. They'd be sick and injured and hungry and no one in the magical world cared. Why should Remus give a shit about the magical world?
He looked at Regulus then turned to walk in the opposite direction. He’d take the long way home tonight.
“Wait!” Regulus shouted, running over and grabbing Remus’s sleeve in both of his hands and staring up at him. His eyes were wild and desperate, “I – I want you to look at me – the way you used to,” his voice cracked.
Remus held his gaze for a long moment, enjoying the feel of Regulus’s soft hands trembling as they clung to him. He reached a hand to Regulus’s cheek, stepping closer.
“You used to be my muse,” Remus whispered, eyes tracing over the features that he had spent years documenting and memorizing, “Before you turned yourself into a worthless slut.”
A strangled, broken noise came from Regulus, his face crumpled in on itself and, to Remus’s surprise, his fists tightened. Remus licked his lips and held back a predatory smirk, instead he kept his face neutral.
“Is that what you want, Starshine? Do you want to be beautiful again?” Remus murmured, brushing his nose against Regulus’s soft, pink cheek. The wizard nodded, eyes still closed. “Do you want to be good for me?”
“Yes,” Regulus breathed, his body trembling.
“You can't do that while you're high,” he said, tilting his head so his breath ghosted across Regulus’s ears, drawing a beautiful little whimper.
“I'm going to make you cum,” Remus said, walking him back against the wall of the alley. Remus said, walking him back against the wall. Regulus said nothing, and was watching Remus with uncertainty written across those gorgeous features.
Remus sank to his knees, and Regulus let out a choked little moan. He quickly undid Regulus’s belt and flies, hesitating for a moment. He'd never seen Regulus's cock before now. He'd felt it, had it in his hand, jerked it off. But the sight was something he fully intended to memorize and do his best to document as soon as he got home.
Reverently he pulled it out. Like Regulus it was long and slim, the pale skin translating to a beautiful, rosy pink. He wanted nothing more than to lavish both this cock and Regulus with praise and compliments. He looked up to where Regulus was staring at him in open disbelief.
Well, his instincts had gotten him this far.
“Look at this,” he said, and loved the way Regulus’s breath hitched in anticipation. “Such a gorgeous cock,” he continued, and Regulus brought a hand to his mouth to cover a small sob. Remus wrapped his hand around it, “Velvety and hot,” he continued, causing whimpers, he licked a stripe from the base to the tip, lapping up the precum, working the slit with his tongue, “You're delicious, Starshine, so fucking perfect.” Another sob, louder, he was shaking now, eyes shut, and Remus could see tears sparkling on those luscious eyelashes.
He licked the head again, Regulus whimpered and his hips bucked. Remus pressed his hips against the wall, hard, stopping him from moving, then took him in his mouth. It was divine, he could do this for hours, would happily just sit there mouthing at and licking and kissing and suckling. As he took it in his mouth, he let himself forget the reality of the situation, let himself tune out that they were, once again, in a dirty alley that Regulus had found him in while drugged and hot. He pretended it was what he actually wanted, closed his eyes and imagined a look of fondness on Regulus’s face, hands caressing his face, wrapping in his hair.
He half-tuned out the noises Regulus was making, only acknowledging those that fit into his fantasy as he worked him and ripped the orgasm from him.
Remus met Regulus’s eye, then turned and spat the load onto the dirty cobblestone with a noise of disgust. He wiped his mouth and stood up, and Regulus stared at him, eyes glazed and unsteady.
“If you want to be good for me, come back sober,” Remus said into his ear, pressing a soft kiss to the corner of his lips before leaving.