Work Text:
Joe Biden was born an angel but always wanted to be friends with the devils. However, the angels and devils had been at war for centuries so any such relationship was strictly forbidden. He sighed and put on his armor preparing for battle. The man walked through the battlefield trying to find his homies. Suddenly, he tripped on a rock and face planted into someone's abs. "Oh em gee hey baby gorl!" Donald Trump said, smirking. "Ah...ah... I g-gotta go!" President Biden stuttered. Dang that guy was so hot. The way his greasy hair glistened in the evening sun, his soulless eyes staring down at him. But there was a glaring problem. Biden was an angel and Trump was a devil! Any romance between them would be frowned upon by the rest of society. But he had to try anyway. He promptly turned back on his heel. "Hey can I have your numb-" but the mysteriously handsome devil had already disappeared in the chaos of battle. Oh well, maybe they would meet again.
For the next week all Trump could think of was the cute angel guy that had face planted in his chest. He mentally kicked himself for not asking for his number. It was too late now, what's in the past is in the past. Somehow he would have to track the beautiful man down.
It had been two weeks and former president Trump had no luck in finding his crush! Right as he was thinking of running his hands through the other man's hair, the bell signaling another battle rung. Trump hastily tossed on his e-girl maid dress and headed out to fight. He searched long and hard through the battlefield to find his one true love. But when he did it was too late.
President Biden lay in a pool of his own kool-aid. Trump hastily ran over to him and cradled Joe in his arms.
"T-Trump my little uwu sussy kittem baby gorl shawty hubby hybrid demon prince." Joe said, his voice hoarse with the tragedies of war. "I've loved you since the moment I saw you..."
"Joe, I love you too."
"I... I... would l-like to... k-... take a moment to introduce today's sponsor Express VPN." Joe Biden died.
"OH BABY PLEASE! PLEASE DONT DIE! I NEED YOU!!! I CANT LIVE WITHOUT YOU!!" Trump cried. Then died.