Chapter Text
"Now, now, I might not have much in terms of life experience compared to you or the other Adepti, but I do have quite a lot when it comes to people."
Xiao watches through narrow eyes as Verr Goldet carefully places a teacup on the railing in front of her. It's oolong tea, he knows the smell, but he's not particularly interested in it at the moment. In fact, he hasn't been interested in anything that she brought him lately. He makes it clear he's not interested in this offering either when he doesn't bother to move from his perch on the roof.
"Don't look at me like that," she turns to him and crosses her arms, "I know something is bothering you. Well more than usual that is. It's enough that you're distracted. I saw that nasty gash on your arm a few days ago." She waves her finger at him as if she's admonishing him. "I won't have you get injured under my watch."
His eyes widen at that and he scoffs. She was more perceptive than he gave her credit for. "It was nothing, besides your vigil alone can do nothing to protect me." He mutters and turns his head away from her. It was nothing, despite how deep the wound tore through his skin, thanks to his otherworldly abilities, it healed quickly. There wasn't even a mark left behind. Though if it had been some abyssal beast he wouldn't have been so lucky. He could've been short of an arm…
"And your distracted mind will do nothing but cause you more pain. Possibly even death, since you appear to be so careless as of late." She fires back boldly.
That was something he always liked about the woman, she was never intimidated by others. Sometimes it got on his nerves, especially when she compared him to Wei, the cat that kept her company. Or when she challenged him without an ounce of fear. Like now.
"Tch, I don't fear death." He snaps, annoyed.
"You shouldn't welcome it either." She throws back quickly, "What would Miss Ganyu think?"
He scowls, just the mention of her name was enough to slight him and he visibly flinches as if burned. "She carries no stakes on my well being, nor will her opinion change the outcome of my possible demise."
Verr's eyebrows rise high on her forehead, and he curses under his breath. " Really? Aren't you two at least friends? I would think she'd be upset with your carelessness." Her tone suggests she knows more than she lets on and it only irritates him further.
"I have no need for mortal ties." He shoots the woman a glare. She never pried into his business like this before, what reason would she have to do so now?
"Hm, so it's about her then, isn't it? You really only get this worked up when she's involved somehow… Did you two fight? I noticed you haven't left to meet with her in a while."
His scowl deepens but he doesn't say anything. She was incredibly distant the weeks leading up to the last time he saw her, but he was never one to pry, so he left her to her own devices whenever she got lost in her thoughts.
When she told him suddenly that she couldn't visit him anymore he didn't think much of it at first. Then she cancelled their training sessions which wouldn't have bothered him at all if not for the first thing that came out of her mouth as to why. She didn't want to see him anymore.Then it was, no wait, that came out wrong! I really meant, I shouldn't… She then devolved into stuttering excuses of it being due to work. It wasn't too surprising, but her word choice did bother him.
Even though she gave him a perfectly fine reason, the only thing that was going through his head at the time was, why?
Couldn't, shouldn't, whatever the case may be, he had said those very same things when she first approached him. But somehow she wormed her way through his carefully crafted defenses, and he barely tried to stop her. Not like he could have. Now all of a sudden she realized he was right all along? He was unnecessarily slighted to say the least.
Needless to say, he made sure he told her exactly what he thought about her using all of her time to help the mortals. She held her head low while he scolded her, but she still offered him a kiss before she left.
For whatever reason he refused and left without taking her back to the city like he usually did.
Now he spent most of his days stewing over whether he upset her or not. She was far from a fragile person, but he didn't even consider that he might have said something that put her off in any way, or maybe even done something… He hadn't bothered to question her, as she had every right to do whatever she wanted. But the more time passed, the more he wondered, and the harder it got for him to simply ignore the empty feeling in his chest wherever he thought about her… which was far too often. It was mentally draining.
On tougher nights the voices that always lurked in the back of his mind twisted his memory of their conversation, turning it into something dark that festered deep in his psyche. He knew their dark whispers were nothing but lies, but that didn't change how much it affected him. He felt so defenseless in the face of this newest kind of onslaught that it left him feeling weary and weak. Those nights were always the hardest to get through…
"I haven't heard from her in a few months. " Verr continues as she leans against the railing, careful not to knock the tea over. "Have you reached out to her at all?"
Xiao purses his lips in irritation, "No."
He did consider it once, but he couldn't really figure out exactly what his reason would be. Fleetingly he entertained the idea to go just to check up on her, but he shot that down quickly. If something bad actually happened to her then he'd be able to sense if something was wrong. Besides, she did say she didn't want to see him, and he had no real reason to go against her wishes…
"I think you should at least make sure she's okay."
"Why would I do that? She's perfectly capable of fending for herself."
Verr hums to herself before pushing off the railing, "And yet… you worry."
Xiao turns his head to glare at the woman again only to find himself alone once again.
Again, he couldn't help but wonder if he hurt her somehow. If he had, why didn't she tell him?
He groans and presses his first into his eye. The constant brooding was starting to make it difficult for him to cleanse the miasma from his body. Not that it was ever easy, but having a clear mind was the most important thing in order to make it as painless as possible.
He sighs heavily and takes a deep breath in an attempt to clear his thoughts. He wasn't sure how long he sat there but the sound of someone calling his name shakes him back to his senses. Carefully, he scans the area across the moonlit marsh before realizing that it didn't come from anywhere nearby.
He's never heard his name spoken with such urgency before. It's far from a command, and lacked the proper lilt of a request. He hears it again, but this time it's so intense that he feels it. It's a timid whisper that sends a shiver down his spine. Instinctively his body goes on high alert but he's momentarily frozen in place with confusion. A few moments pass before he hears it again, all he knows for certain is the lips that it comes from are sweeter than any dream he's ever tasted.
A tinge of fear settles in his stomach. If anything dared to harm her, he would make sure it lived just long enough to regret it…