Chapter Text
Thanatos once told Zagreus that to mortals, there is a fine line between Death and Sleep.
“They think we live in two caves, side by side,” he’d said with a scoff. “Ever ensconced in darkness.”
Next to the Styx, face cast red in its glow, his usual frown appeared far more severe—all too different from Hypnos’ honey-thick grins. Zag sat at his side, watching as his brow furrowed and his fist clenched. Than often seeks the grounding weight of his scythe and the warm presence of his gauntlet. Zagreus wonders, particularly in such strange, quiet moments of affectability, if Than would hide away completely beneath that hood and metal if he could; he even flirts with the idea of taking Than’s hand just to see if he might provide some form of stability in their stead.
Voice dipping lower as if he was readying to impart a secret, Than continued, “Hypnos reclines on a bed of ebony in a sea of poppies and I… They see me as wreathed in them—the poppies—cradling a butterfly to my chest. They are inclined to paint us together, always.” He lapsed into silence, his gaze distant.
“I think it’s sweet,” Zagreus murmured, smiling at the thought of the two swathed in the bloody glory of poppies. “Strange, yes, but quite sweet.”
Than snorted but said no more.
Before his excursions into Tartarus and beyond, Zagreus thought Death and Sleep’s differences to be as stark as those between Thanatos and Hypnos themselves. Now, having experienced the various faces of Death, properly befriended the ever-somnolent Hypnos, and grown close to Than in ways he never could have dreamed, it’s clear to him they’re not so different after all. Perhaps it’s a manifestation of the familial bond between Than and his brother or a more purposeful design of the Fates, of this he can’t be sure. Either way, one need only spend a night by Than’s side to see the stillness.
It’s hard to say, but Zagreus suspects it’s early in the morning as no muffled song comes from the halls. For him to wake before Than is a rarity, and rarer still is finding Than at his side considering the demands of his work.
Zag tucked himself against Than in his sleep, head resting on his chest. Than’s heart soothes him with its languid cadence. His pulse, slower and weaker than Zagreus’ own, is lulling. When he closes his eyes, Zagreus pictures a little bat beating its wings near-silently in the cage of Than’s ribs and his lips curl.
Zagreus nuzzles against Than’s chest and strokes his fingertips over his sternum. He runs cooler than Zag, but at the moment his skin is warm with life beneath his lips, a result of sleeping at Zag’s side. There’s something sweet about that—Zag’s presence having some tangible effect upon his lover’s being. It’s his heat on Than’s skin and feeling it leaves him breathless with a dizzying sense of possession.
Bracing himself on one elbow, Zagreus slowly props himself up to admire Than’s face. He appears younger with his lips softly parted and hair mussed. His breaths are so shallow their cool touch is more noticeable than the movement of his chest. It would be all too easy to mistake him for dead; as morbid a thought as it is, he’s dreadfully beautiful like this.
Pale lashes rest against his cheeks, unmoving. Gleaming gold and silver in the candlelight, his hair halos his face. The strands are as fine as spider silk beneath Zag’s fingertips. Their color is stark against the wine-red of the pillow. He tucks a lock behind Than’s ear before tracing its shell. But for his ears, so delicate and rather small, his features are strong: his jaw, his nose, his sharp eyes. Humming, Zag drags his knuckles along Than’s cheek. His skin is smooth—perfect as marble. Truly, he’s a work of art worthy of Praxiteles’ eye.
“Beautiful…” Zagreus whispers. His fingertips drift to Than’s neck, seeking out his pulse. Tenderly cradling his throat, Zag keeps his breaths as soft as possible so he can hear Than’s. He stays like that until he can hardly distinguish the throb of his heart from Than’s own—until each beat rocks through him, gentle and monumental in equal measure, as if they are joined.
One night not long ago, in the quiet of Zag’s chambers, Than pressed his mouth to Zag’s ear and told him of Plato, Aristophanes, and the androgyne. “Aristophanes spoke of two humans born as one, bodies and souls intertwined. There were three forms: all male, all female, and the androgyne—the balance of beings, male and female. The men came from Helios, the women from Gaia, the androgyne from Luna. They dared to challenge Olympus, seeking the power of the gods, and for it, Zeus split them in half.”
As the tale went on, Zag’s brow furrowed. “This is just the nonsense babbling of mortals, yes? I didn’t think you gave their tales such thought.”
“Listen,” Than insisted, laughter coloring his voice the warm red of blood. His breath caressed Zag’s skin, his chill meeting Zag’s feverish heat and giving him shivers. “Following their split, the humans were left feeling lost—terribly flawed for their incompletion.”
Zagreus clutched Than tighter, unsettled by the concept despite its humor. To be cursed in such a manner—to be unmade so cruelly, so wholly—in his eyes, nothing could ever match such brutality.
“They search now,” Than continued, lips grazing Zag’s ear. “They search for their other half—for the missing part of their soul. Only together can they be truly whole.”
Zag’s mind went immediately to Achilles and Patroclus. Before seeing them together, united once more, Zagreus thought Achilles quite placid, at least compared to the House of Hades’ other denizens. But with his lover at his side, the hurt Achilles carries with him, close to his heart, so raw and weeping, is quieted. Complete, Achilles had said, complete with Pat by his side. Only Patroclus’ presence can becalm his soul. Then there is Patroclus himself, and how the dying embers of forgotten battlegrounds carried in his eyes transformed into the warm caress of a sleeping hearth upon taking Achilles’ hand.
With them in mind, the story no longer felt quite so nonsensical.
“That’s… not what I expected to hear after our congress, I must admit.”
“I’m trying to be romantic,” he muttered darkly. “I’m—Zag,” he growled, nipping at Zag’s jaw before kissing his way to his ear. “You fool, I’m telling you, as absurd a tale as it is, I…” His hand swept over his hip—seeking—claiming. “I feel I understand. When I’m with you, Zagreus, I understand…”
In the present, they’re pressed together, Zag’s leg gently hooked over Than’s own, fingers lingering over his pulse. And yet, as close as they are, it’s not enough. Zag’s chest throbs and his blood sings with the need to be closer still. He wants to bury himself in Thanatos, needs to take Than within himself, feel him inside and out. If he could, he would melt into Than, allowing their bodies and souls to connect and blend. Only then would this ache within him ease.
Overwhelmed by the building tension behind his ribs, Zagreus lowers his lips to Than’s skin. He slides his hand from Than’s throat to his shoulder and down until he reaches Than’s chest. He’s sensitive here, sometimes to the point of pain, so Zagreus knows to be mindful in his teasing. Keeping his touch light, he thumbs at Than’s nipple and the golden hoop there until his skin is tightly pebbled; Than sighs quietly, shifting in his sleep. Easing up on the one, Zagreus kisses his way to the other, lapping at his nipple before pressing a kiss to it. It’s so soft, Zag can’t help but pause, brushing his mouth over it again and again, catching the piercing between his lips.
Thanatos’ skin is lovely. Zagreus can’t bear to pull away, instead decorating Than’s chest with wet, languid kisses. When he reaches the ghost of a scar above Than’s heart—a nick from when Ares pestered him into a duel centuries ago, Than had explained, his face beset with a scowl and a flush that crawled down his throat—Zag pauses to attend to it with lips and tongue. He strokes Than’s ribs, smiling when he feels goosebumps beneath his fingertips. Here, usually hidden beneath Than’s chiton, is a smattering of beauty marks and he takes the time to kiss each. When satisfied, Zag drags his tongue over Than’s collarbone, garnering shivers.
Than murmurs wordless little sounds in his sleep, tucking his face against the pillow. It’s utterly precious—vulnerable in a way Thanatos would never allow himself to be in waking.
Taking advantage of his position, Zagreus noses against Than’s throat. In a daze, Zag ghosts his lips across his pulse before letting them part. He touches the tip of his tongue to Than’s skin, caressing. He breathes deep, basking in his scent, tasting it on his tongue. Than still smells faintly of the palm oil Zag massaged across his back the night before and woody from the manna mortals burn for him. Beneath that is his natural scent, alluring in its own way.
Zagreus wants to be surrounded, consumed—to drown out all else with Thanatos. Enraptured as he is, he cannot look away from his lover nor can he imagine a more beautiful sight. He hears only Than’s faint breaths and the drowsy beat of his heart. His hands tremble with such a terrible need to touch and claim and know every inch of him, he fears he’ll lose himself to it entirely. And the taste of him—oh, but the taste of him. Spurred into action by the dizzying spiral of his thoughts, Zagreus laps at the hollow of his throat, swallowing down a moan.
Thanatos makes the softest, loveliest noise: a breathless gasp trembling with the weight of his burgeoning need. Zagreus jumps lightly when fingers comb through his hair, but he’s quick to settle once more, eyes fluttering closed. As the gossamer webs of sleep still cling to him, Than fumbles, fingertips catching on Zag’s ear and knuckles bumping against his scalp. Zag can’t recall the last time he witnessed Than falter in any way, even in one so very small.
The warmth in Zag’s chest—the love—threatens to overcome him. This is a side to Than that Zagreus is being trusted to see with increasing frequency, but it still feels tender in its freshness. His eyes sting. It’s so much, so intense, he struggles to breathe for a moment. Were it anyone else, Zagreus would find it less affective, but he knows Than and the ways he seeks to veil his heart.
“Zagreus,” he says, voice gravelly with sleep. “Whatever are you doing?” His hand settles at the back of Zag’s neck, squeezing. Before Zag can form a response, Than guides him up, lips brushing over his jaw. “So insatiable you couldn’t even wait for me to wake?”
“You’re so beautiful,” Zagreus whispers as if it’s a confession. He’s breathless with the truth of it. He kisses Than’s jaw in turn before finding his lips. His skin thrills beneath Than’s touch. His heart lurches. “I—Than… you were just so beautiful.” Speaking it doesn’t ease the pain; his chest feels as if it will crack, sending the love multiplying within him spilling forth, but such sublime suffering it is.
Than’s grip falters. His breath hitches. “Zag,” he mutters, somewhere between chiding and embarrassed.
“It’s true. You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.” Zagreus holds himself above Than to meet his eyes. They shine in the low light—clear citrine, the first rays of sunlight, the glint of gold and obol. “The sight of you… To see you at peace…”
Thanatos looks at him with something akin to fear tainting his expression. Zag’s chest constricts. Unsure, he takes in all that he can from the wrinkle of Than’s brow to the downturn of his lips.
He cups Than’s cheek. “I’m sorry,” he breathes. He leans in and brushes kisses across Than’s forehead, trying to impart the pure reverence he feels. “I didn’t mean to-to—” He’s not sure. He’s not sure what he did or said or failed to do or say, but oh, how his chest aches with his guilt. “I didn’t mean to be so—overwhelming.” He swallows, forcing himself to withdraw and face Than once more.
Zag smiles—sincerely smiles, for how could he not with Than at his side? “I was overcome by your beauty,” he continues, aiming at levity. “Who can blame me, when you look as lovely as you do?”
Than’s brow only knits further.
Zag’s grin fades. “Than?”
Blinking rapidly, Than looks away. “Ah, sorry, I—I suppose waking up, I—” He shakes his head. “You don’t need to apologize.”
“Than… You can tell me if—”
“Hush.” Than steels his expression. He guides Zag in again until their foreheads touch. “Sleep is simply lingering with me still. You can always trust me to say when an apology is in order,” he adds wryly.
“Even so, I should have asked you more explicitly.”
At times such as these, Zag wishes he were more like Megaera. Boundaries, preparation, and restraint come naturally to her. When she sat Than and Zagreus down to discuss these things, Zag thought that perhaps his eagerness—no, his impatience—would be tempered by various agreements and precautions to the point of being rendered a nonissue, at least in the bedroom. In hindsight, he recognizes the assumption as naïve.
Compelled by his mounting worry, he hurriedly continues, “Before, I mean. Before we went to sleep. If it was okay for me to touch you while—”
“It’s all right, beloved. I told you I enjoy this sort of thing, or did you forget?” Than rubs his nose against Zag’s own. “I haven’t changed my mind. If I ever do, I’ll tell you.” When Zagreus makes no move to respond, he reiterates, “You haven’t overstepped. And, well…” A laugh escapes him, unsteady and unfamiliar coming from Than’s lips. “It… It felt wonderful…”
“Oh…” Zag wets his lips. The tension that was holding his shoulders rigid seeps away like water through cracked stone.
“Would you like to continue?” Thanatos drags his nails down Zag’s neck, eliciting a shiver. His smile is crooked and teasing. “I’ll make it up to you for ruining the, ah, the mood, I suppose.”
“I would like that,” he croaks, throat dry. “I would like that very much.”
Laughter sweet against Zag’s lips, Than kisses him thoroughly. Guided by Than’s sure hands, Zagreus drapes himself across his chest. His heartbeat stutters when their skin touches; his breath leaves him when their cocks slide together. Groaning, Than licks past his lips with lazy, warm swipes of his tongue. With one hand, he grips Zag’s hip, languidly grinding against him. Each drag forces another gasp from Zag’s throat only to be hungrily breathed in by Thanatos. It’s as if Than needs it and desperately so, surviving solely on Zagreus’ breath. His other hand returns to Zagreus’ hair, tenderly cradling the back of his head. Zag feels like a cossetted treasure when touched in such a way; his heart gives another little jerk as if caught on a hook.
“I looked at you,” Zagreus whispers. Than’s wicked tongue threatens to distract him, but he manages to say at least a little more. “I looked at you—next to me, so tender with sleep—”
Than tilts his head, straining to nip Zag’s ear. “Drooling on your pillows,” he says disdainfully.
“Yes, that’s exactly it—I was overcome with lust at the sight.” He draws his lips, parted and wanting still, across Than’s jaw.
“You’ve always had odd tastes, I suppose.” Than’s hand wanders downwards from his hip, edging closer to his ass.
“In—Fuck…”
Than grips one cheek tightly, fingertips digging into Zag’s flesh. His stomach tumbles over and shivers glide down his spine. Than’s hold spreads him open, if only slightly. His hole clenches. He feels exposed in the best of ways
“Oh,” Zag croaks, hips stuttering against Than’s own. There’s something about being handled like this that makes him hot and dizzy. It’s different from the tenderness of a moment ago, but no less visceral in effect. He grows hotter still when Than gives him a squeeze. “Oh!” His eyes flutter closed. He feels possessed by his lust, by his love, star-bright in his veins.
Than chuckles. “You were saying?”
“I, uh…”
“That’s what I thought.”
“I-I’m trying to be romantic!” Zagreus reproaches. He bites Than’s jaw for good measure.
“I’m here, aren’t I? In your bed, just as you said. No need to romance me further.”
Zagreus pulls back. Than grunts, trying to reel him in, but Zag’s gotten stronger—he stays right where he is, peering down at his lover. Than is flushed, lips vinaceous and wet from their kisses. Zag wants nothing more than to kiss him again, but something feels unsettled in his chest. It’s an unfamiliar sensation and, as subtle as it is, he can’t quite pinpoint it beyond a sense of prickling disquiet. He knows better than to brush it aside, though it would be all too easy to; if he’s learned anything, it’s to trust his instincts.
“All the more reason to romance you, in my humble opinion.”
Than’s eyes flicker. “Oh? And why is that?”
“Well…” Zagreus ducks his head to kiss Than’s cheek. “My love for you only continues to grow… It would be a shame for such blooms to go unseen.” He kisses the edge of Than’s jaw and feels the clench of his teeth, the clutching of his hands. Something winds tight in his belly in turn. “As I was saying… I saw you… so lovely in your sleep…” A kiss to his ear. “I was struck again by the depths and intensity of my love for you. Never have I felt something so pure—an emotion that moved my soul so profoundly.”
“Zagreus,” he growls. He winds his fingers through Zagreus’ hair and pulls, wrenching a high moan from Zag’s throat.
Heat pulses between Zag’s thighs; his cock aches. He squeezes his eyes shut. Than, in full control now, positions his head just so before kissing him breathless, biting his lips and sucking on his tongue. The fire that courses through Zagreus’ veins is so powerful he feels lightheaded, devastated by the pleasure.
“Than, Tha-an,” he pants, mouth slack. “The way you make me feel—Oh, you make me—complete.”
“Hush,” Than orders. His voice is raw in a way Zagreus has never heard before and it pierces his heart. Deliriously, he pictures Eros’ arrow, traditional bronze replaced by gold and its fletching crafted of a dove’s feathers, springing from Than’s lips to find its mark between Zagreus’ ribs. He can feel it—the exquisite, flawless pain perfectly tempering his pleasure.
“Can you—Fuck, sweetheart, do you not—Am I making you uncomfortable?” Zagreus can hardly think with Than lapping at his jaw and grinding their cocks together. “Saying—Saying what I’m saying, is it—It’s only that you make me whole, truly, and that you fill me with such need—”
The whining cry Than releases is so wounded, so small, Zagreus feels as if ice water is spilling down his back. His heart rattles against his ribs. He lurches into motion so quickly his muscles ache with it, but still, he forces himself onto his knees so he can better meet Than’s eyes.
Than is quick to hide his face against the pillow, clasping a hand over his mouth as he does. His blush creeps from high across his cheeks down to his heaving chest. His cock is beautifully flushed with his need and spreading slick across his fluttering stomach. As hard as he is, his foreskin is drawn back to reveal the soft purpling of his skin.
Zagreus relaxes ever so slightly at the gorgeous display of lust, but his concerns linger. “Than… I don’t understand.”
“I-I’m sorry. It’s…” He squeezes his eyes shut. “I’m not… I’m not upset.”
Zagreus scoffs.
“I’m not,” he bites. “Surely that much is obvious!” As soon as he’s said it, his tight expression softens. Almost self-consciously, he presses his thighs together; it only serves to draw Zag’s attention to his cock once more, and even now, he can’t help but long to taste it. Than continues, mumbling, “I’m… I’m sorry. I’m struggling to find the words.”
“My love…” Zagreus cups his cheek. His brow furrows. “My love, please, I…”
“Please, Zagreus. Please don’t ask me to explain myself. Trust when I say it’s all right…” He drags his hand over his face. “I understand that my behavior is-is perhaps… out of character, but I swear I’m not upset.”
“Overwhelmed?” Zag asks quietly. He strokes Than’s cheek, his jaw, his hair. Catching himself, his movements falter. He bites the inside of his cheek. Before he can ask, Than arches his neck, searching for Zag’s touch; relieved, he returns to combing his fingers through Than’s hair.
“Yes… Yes, I suppose that’s the best way to put it… But it’s not—bad. I’m just struggling to…” He takes a shuddering breath. He can’t quite meet Zag’s eyes. “To express myself.”
“It’s not bad…” Zagreus says slowly, again tucking a lock of hair behind Than’s ear. “But is it good?”
Than’s hand curls into a fist where it’s still pressed to his lips. His blush reaches the tips of his ears. He looks so very comely painted bright with his lust that, for a moment, Zagreus can’t breathe.
“Do you… Do you like it?” Zag whispers.
Than’s breath hitches. He looks stubbornly over Zagreus’ shoulder.
“Do you like hearing how your beauty grips me?” His fingers drift down Than’s throat, touch light as a feather. “How it moves me? Drives me to the brink of madness?”
Than shivers. His cock twitches.
Heat roars to life in the pit of Zag’s belly. “Oh… Oh, Thanatos, beloved… Sweetheart, may I show you?” He pets over Than’s chest, hesitating only a moment before thumbing at his nipple; it peaks readily beneath his touch. He plucks at his piercing and Than jumps. The fire builds higher still until Zagreus is breathless with it. “I want to,” he whispers, “to show you how I need you. How your beauty moves me, body and soul.”
“Please,” Than croaks. He reaches out, movements jerky, to grip Zag’s shoulder. “Don’t tease me. Don’t. I know you mean no harm but—"
“I mean what I say,” he insists. “I mean every word.”
Than’s eyes flit away before returning. He searches Zagreus’ expression, his flush growing all the while. “Please… Please.”
With great care, Zagreus shifts so he’s kneeling between Than’s thighs. He skims his palms over Than’s legs before guiding them into an easy sprawl. “Is this all right, my love?”
Than nods, still dazed. “I’ll tell you if something isn’t.”
“It never hurts to check.”
“You’re so sweet to me,” he sighs, looking at Zagreus as if awed.
Zag pauses. He gives Than’s thighs a squeeze. “Checking in is just the decent thing to do. You deserve that and more, beloved. To be treated gently—with the utmost kindness and love.” He strokes up Than’s thighs and hips. He traces over his hipbones, watching as Than’s muscles bunch and precum beads at the crown of his cock.
Gasping, Than tightens his grip on his shoulder. His eyes are glassy—drugging in their allure. Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. Every inch of him, through and through. He’s so lovely it hurts to look at him, so transcendent one breath beneath his gaze is on par with the slow drag of a knife through flesh.
“You deserve so much.” Zagreus strokes the insides of Than’s legs, drawing swirls through the downy hair there and edging upwards as he goes. “You work so hard—you’re so very dedicated to your duties and so kind to the souls who rely upon you. And yet, even when the humans fear you, forget you in their offerings, and meet you with dread in their eyes, you don’t complain.” Zag’s fingertips ghost over the delicate crease where thigh meets torso. “You don’t ask for thanks. Your kindness never wavers,” he whispers, brushing his knuckles along the length of Than’s cock.
Than grits his teeth and whines, back arching off the bed. He’s not usually so vocal, at least not in this way: he expresses his pleasure through honeyed sighs and long, low groans that curl around Zag’s bones. Yet now he’s releasing high little noises that flutter from his lips and set Zagreus aflame.
“Let me show you the recognition you deserve.” Zag licks his lips. “Besides, bringing you pleasure… it’s intoxicating.”
“Zagreus…”
“Being trusted with your body… with your heart… Thanatos, there is no greater honor I can imagine.”
With the prettiest moan yet, Than wraps his legs around Zag’s hips. With this new leverage, he draws him in. “Please… I need you, please…”
Zagreus sucks in a breath through his nose as his cock brushes Than’s thigh. “And I need you. I need you so badly.” He curls his fingers around Than’s length, grip loose, unmoving. His pulse once again radiates through that single touch and Zagreus’s blood and bones thrum along with it. “Allow me to show you. Let me take care of you.”
Than bites his lip. “I-I love you.”
“Words… Words cannot express my love for you, Than.”
He strokes Than’s cock once, pace as slow as he can manage. Rapt, he watches as his lover writhes. Than fists his hands in the sheets. His breath hitches. His throat bobs. He sighs sweetly. Lust has taken hold of him, stripping him of his usual precautions and shields in favor of baring his raw, wanton need.
“Look at you… Show me how good you feel. Let me hear you,” Zag urges. He spreads Than’s slick down his cock, squeezing the base gently. A wavering moan is his reward. “My golden one, so beautiful…”
“Touch me,” Than groans, rolling his hips. He hisses when Zagreus’ hold tightens. “Like that. Yes, yes…”
Zagreus is captivated by the movement of his muscles, from his taut thighs to his trembling stomach. With his free hand, Zag strokes his pectorals, the hollows of his abs, and the divot of his iliac furrow before tracing the hair trailing from his navel to the shaft of his straining cock.
“Tell me what you desire. I’ll give you anything—everything.”
Than’s legs flex around Zagreus’ hips. “Blood and darkness,” he groans. “And what… what of you? What do you desire?”
“This,” Zagreus breathes, thumb teasing over the head of Than’s prick. When Than jolts and fists a hand in Zag’s hair, a pulse of heat rocks through him, rattling the breath from his lips. “This is what I want: to serve as a conduit bearing your pleasure.”
Zag tightens his hold and fists Than’s cock in a long, rough stroke. Mouth slack, Than mewls for him, his sounds sweet as nectar. Zag releases him in favor of stroking his balls and Than shudders, unfocused eyes falling closed. His heels dig into the small of Zag’s back. Every little show of his pleasure is enough to elicit an equally powerful reaction from Zag, feeding his lust as one would a flame.
“You’re bewitching… Do you know what you do to me? How you’ve possessed me?” He drags Than’s hips off the bed before curling over him until Than is nearly bent double and pinned there. Their cocks slide together, wet with their desire, punching a moan from Zag’s chest.
He’s much too small to shroud Than’s body with his own as Than does to him when their positions are reversed. Even so, something about being above him makes Zagreus feel tall and broad. Despite how Zag complains about the teasing he receives, he’s never much wanted to be a larger man, and yet he’ll readily admit there’s something heady about the illusion in the here and now.
Than loops his arms around Zag’s neck, scrabbling weakly for purchase. He tucks his chin to his chest to watch as their bodies move together, utterly obscene. His eyes widen and his lips tremble. “Oh… Oh—" Overcome by the sight, he squeezes his eyes shut and moans.
“Keep—Fuck. Fuck. Keep looking at yourself. Look how pretty your cock is, darling.”
Head lolling, Than forces his eyes open only to rush to close them once more. “I-I—” He’s flushed brilliantly, and his breathing is uneven. Sweat beads at his brow and trails a lazy path down his chest, tracing his ribs.
“Do you want to come like this?”
The sound he makes is nigh a sob.
“Do—” Zagreus grits his teeth against his pleasure, willing himself to maintain his control. “Do you want to come like this? All over yourself? You’d be so—fuck, so very pretty.”
Than’s nails bite the back of his neck.
“Do you want to come down my throat? Let me taste you?”
Throwing back his head, he croaks, “Zagreus!”
“Anything. Anything, beloved, just-just tell me and I’ll…” He trails off, hands tight around Than’s hips. “I mean it. Please—fuck! Please, my love…”
“Suck me,” he gasps. “Suck me and-and take me. Take me as you see fit. Please, Zagreus! Please…”
Pulled by an unseen force, Zagreus lurches forward, claiming Than’s mouth. Beneath him, Than shudders and moans against his lips. His arms and legs tighten, holding Zag close. With his body drawn taut, he feels almost small—easy to hold and love tenderly.
Addicted to the pitiful, eager noises Than’s making, Zag kisses his bottom lip before accepting his tongue between his lips. Sucking on it draws forth more high, lilting whines, and so his vigor builds.
Each touch sends sparks feathering down Zag’s spine, filling him with fire and light. He fights himself, determined to hold back rather than chase his pleasure, as tempting as it is. As he withdraws, Than slurs his name and struggles to hold on, to keep him close, fingers curling in his hair and against the back of his neck.
“It’s okay, I’m going to take care of you,” Zagreus promises, meeting Than’s darkened eyes. He cups his cheek and strokes his hair, unsticking a lock from his damp forehead. “I’ll take such good care of you, my love.”
Expression pained, Than combs his fingers through Zag’s hair in turn before taking hold. The dull ache of it makes Zag’s pulse race. He tilts his head into the motion, allowing Than to do as he pleases.
The fog fades, leaving Than’s eyes limpid and piercing in their intensity. He wets his lips, his tongue, crocus-pink, momentarily caught between his teeth like a blossom. “Need you,” he whispers, the softest of confessions. “I need you. I’ve never needed anyone—anything—the way I need you.”
The wounded-animal noise that tears from Zagreus’s chest leaves his heart throbbing. He tries to speak, to let loose all the emotions building in his throat, but they lodge there like tears. He wants to return the sentiment—does return it—yet all that escapes him is a pathetic whisper of Than’s name.
Than searches his face, gaze flitting from his eyes to his lips and back again. “You know that, don’t you?” He swallows. “You must know.”
“Then let me—” Zag’s voice cracks. He bites the inside of his cheek. “Let me take care of you.”
Body racked with shivers, Than turns away and tucks his chin to his shoulder. Zagreus catches his wrists before he can obscure his expression further, pinning his hands to the bed. Than’s reaction is instantaneous: arched back, choked gasp, wide eyes. He’s all vinous blushes and endless dark eyes, efflorescing beneath Zagreus—for him—revealing a side of him Zag has rarely glimpsed. Zagreus watches, breath faltering, as Than bares his throat and moans.
“Zagreus,” he calls, shameless and writhing. He doesn’t fight Zag’s hold but rises against it as if encouraging Zag to hold him down with more force. He rocks his hips, doing everything he can to create friction. “Zagreus… Please…”
“Anything,” Zagreus rasps, draping himself over Than and tucking his face against his throat. “I’ll give you anything.”
“And what of me? What—” He hisses through his teeth, circling his hips so their cocks grind. “What am I to give you? I-I want to take care of you—”
“You do. Darkness, darling, you do! All the time.” Zagreus kisses his neck, feverish affection making the brush of his lips messy and quick. “Let me return your affections.”
Than chokes back a sob, straining though he still doesn’t fight to break free. “I-I—” He keens, eyes fluttering.
Zagreus squeezes his wrists once before releasing him. Than makes a mournful sound that resonates in Zag’s chest. His hands immediately find purchase in the sheets and Zag’s hair, nails light against his scalp. Biting and kissing Than’s skin as he makes his way to the cradle of his hips, Zag leaves blooms of violet in his wake as an offering.
Reaching the precum pooled on his abs, Zagreus groans and laps it up with slow drags of his tongue. Than’s stomach quivers beneath his lips. When his tongue bumps the head of Than’s cock, he jolts, sucking air through his teeth.
“Tease,” Than grouses.
Zag chuckles, unable to suppress it. He turns his attention to Than’s prick, ghosting his lips over the glans before skimming down the shaft. It’s so soft and warm, lovely to the touch, he does it again. Thanatos audibly struggles to keep his breaths steady around the small, murmuring sounds each caress spurs from his throat. To keep him still, Zag hooks his arms over his thighs. In response, Than urges him down, down, down with the hand fisted in his hair.
Zag’s lips grow wet with Than’s precum. He catches it up with his tongue, keening softly at the taste of him. He eagerly spreads it down Than’s length, slicking his skin further.
Chasing after his taste, Zagreus mouths at his frenulum before taking the head between his lips. He sucks messily, smearing precum and saliva across his chin. His gaze finds Than’s, whose eyes are lidded and wet with unshed tears. Something about his expression—knitted brows and parted lips—makes Zagreus’ stomach clench and his cock throb.
Zag ruts against the bed, desperate for relief. He’s nearing the limits of his self-control. A burst of precum spills across his tongue. He whines, eagerly swallowing it down. Thanatos. He’s full of him—nearing oneness with him—and yet it’s not enough.
“So warm,” Than gasps, tongue flickering across his bottom lip. He already looks so debauched with curls of his hair clinging to his forehead and bruises decorating his throat like jewels. “Warm,” he repeats almost dreamily.
“Please, I-I—” He bites his lip when Zagreus hollows his cheeks. His resulting, tinny cry sends a pulse of heat down Zag’s spine. “Suck me, please—take more, suck me, let me—” Another swallow, stronger this time, and Than’s voice shatters, words giving way to sharp noises so airy they’re barely there.
Zag feels overheated just as he did when he first experienced the touch of sunlight upon his skin. As warm and welcoming as it was, it was staggering—it left his thoughts muddled and his eyes rimmed with tears. Thanatos, glorious Thanatos! His touch can be like that of sunlight, devastating in its effect, or like moonlight, all tenderness perfectly honed—a blade so sharp it feels like a kiss. To Zagreus, he holds a potency beyond all measure: his body, a thing of elegant shadow and reserved power; his scent, masculine and sharp with his rising pleasure; and his voice, his voice is the most moving force of them all.
Spurred on by the heady lust grounding him in the moment, by the starlight brewing in his chest, and Than’s shaky hold, he slakes his thirst. He bobs his head, taking more until the crown of Than’s cock is pressed to his throat. Serving Than in this way is an experience he can hardly describe. This pleasure, this act—it’s all given freely and yet, in some sense, he feels treasured and used in equal measure. It is his tribute, yet also his power. He kneels at the altar and still he’s the only one who can move Thanatos, who can compel him body and soul as the higher gods compel the movements of the heavens above.
It’s all so much and yet he’s still hungry for more.
Than can barely move with Zag pinning him, but he takes advantage of what slack there is, hips undulating. His cock delves deeper with little, tight thrusts. “Ah, ah, ah…” With each pass he gasps more precious noises that add to the arcane fire in Zag’s veins.
To be filled by Than has Zagreus brimming with a sense of contentment. Like this, they are undeniably connected. The ache of his jaw, the burn of a fist in his hair, and the taste of Than on his tongue are constant reminders. It’s difficult for Zagreus to control himself when all he wants is to offer his mouth to be properly used—to be fucked and claimed.
Zag whines, nails biting at the meat of Than’s thighs, and he jumps, cursing. He pulls Zag from his cock, groaning all the while. “I can’t, I can’t—”
Zagreus allows himself to be manhandled but gives into temptation and laps at Than’s slit one last time before he goes.
“Darkness,” Than cries. “I can’t—I-I’ll come, please—"
Zag’s cock pulses. He wants it—wants to taste it, to be painted in it, anointed in Than’s spend in an act of holy debauchery. He groans.
“Take me. Fuck, take me, Zagreus!”
Dragging his lips along the inside of Than’s trembling thigh, Zag pants, “What if I want it all? What if I want to make you come over and over again, beloved?”
A broken sob is his answer.
Zag drops his forehead to Than’s skin, sucking in greedy breaths. He feels half faint he’s so delirious with his need. Still, he presses on, murmuring, “Allow me to take care of you… Let me tend to you with all the tenderness I possess. I want to, Thanatos. I want to spoil you…”
“I can only take so much,” Than rasps.
“I know—I know, my love, let me worry about what you can take. Let me treat you with the care you deserve. Just—Just let me attend to you, sweetheart.”
Than’s eyes glitter, catching the blues and golds of the candlelight like cut jewels. “Why?” he whispers, voice unsteady and crackling like shifting ice. “I—Zagreus, I—” His voice fails him. He bites his lip and sweeps a hand upwards, to his throat, as if silently urging his words to flow forth. “It’s more than I could dream.”
Lifting his head, Zagreus blinks up at him. His thoughts are so honey-thick he briefly wonders if he misheard him. “How do you mean?”
Like gleaming minnows, his eyes dart away, searching for some distraction to seize upon. His shoulders creep toward his ears.
“Than… Than, darling, talk to me…” Zag strokes his legs, drawing gentle circles with the pads of his fingertips. A part of him fears a sudden movement might scare him off, shattering the moment entirely, though he knows Than better than that—Zag may be fiercely stubborn, but so is Than in his own way.
“Do as you please,” he chokes out, gaze settled on the shadowy corners of the room. “Do… Do it.”
Gripping his thigh, Zagreus murmurs, “But is it what you desire, too?”
Than’s hand flies to his mouth, clasping over it to stifle whatever sounds threaten to spill forth. He nods twice, movements tight as if he’s fighting to control himself.
“All right, sweetheart.” He won’t do him the disservice of doubting him, not now; perhaps, earlier in their relationship, when this level of trust was not yet more than a bud, he would demand a clearer answer. He knows Than, though, and while it’s plain to see there’s more he’s hiding just behind his teeth, Than will share it in time. “Just—You’ll tell me, won’t you? If it’s too much?”
Another little nod. “Yes. Please, I—I will. I’ll tell you.” Than pointedly looks to the side, still unable, for whatever reason, to meet Zag’s gaze. With it all welling forth, he likely fears Zagreus will see it in his eyes.
“I’ll have you then…”
With that, Zagreus strokes Than’s cock once, simply to feel how wet he is—to enjoy the mess of it—before taking him between his lips. He’s even slicker now, precum readily spilling across Zag’s tongue. Zag’s eyes slip closed, and he moans, swallowing as much as he can.
Than throws his head back, both hands now clutched over his mouth. His hips twist and squirm, but Zag keeps him right where he wants him.
Zag lightly sucks just around the crown of Than’s cock. It earns him the loveliest, whiniest little sounds; despite Than’s best efforts to silence himself, they build in strength until Zagreus can hear them clear as a bell. Than’s thighs shake and his stomach, taut with strain, quivers.
Zag tongues slowly around the glans, basking in Than’s deepening groans. He’s so responsive. It’s as if each touch is electric, lighting him up inside and out. Zagreus has seen him lost to pleasure before but never like this—never so openly gone. His skin nearly glows in the candlelight, shining with his sweat and Zag’s wet kisses.
He sucks harder.
Than lurches. His hands fly to Zag’s hair, clutching at him shakily. “Za-Zag—Ple-ease! Please! I-I—” His voice cracks, breaking into a stuttering moan. “Please!”
Zag allows Than to guide him down his cock; he swallows him to the base, taking him into his throat. When the head of his cock breaches the tight clutch of Zag’s throat, Than’s voice rises higher still before he goes completely silent, all his pretty noises caged in his chest.
The ache of Zag’s hair being pulled, and his throat being fucked, has his cock twitching against the sheets. He’s feverish with his need. It’s so much, so intense, he thinks he might come before Than.
He draws back until only the crown of Than’s cock is between his lips. Than is looking at him now, eyes hazy and lidded, mouth so pretty around his panting breaths. He can’t look away, entranced.
Zag’s skin goes hot and cold. His heart lurches. Holding Than’s gaze, he curls his tongue over the slit of his cock.
A moan carves its way from deep within Than’s chest. His grip tightens before loosening once more. His fingers stray from Zag’s hair, tracing down his jaw, then, trembling, feel across the flesh of his cheeks. In answer, Zag tilts his head, pressing Than’s cock against the inside of his cheek. Than’s brow tightens. He applies the barest hint of pressure with his fingertips, slow, hesitant, but wanting all the same.
“Darkness,” he gasps. “Zagreus… That—” He swallows. “That’s… utterly obscene…”
Zagreus must force down a smile. There’s a power to driving Than speechless. The sensation is akin to that of adrenaline lingering in the blood after a successful battle and the first shiverings of intoxication.
Typically, their positions are switched, with Than taking control, sometimes on his own and sometimes with Meg at his side. And, oh, but of course Zagreus loves it. It feels right, like he’s where he’s meant to be when he’s beneath them, surrounded by them, and at their mercy. The sense of reverence, of reciprocity, and trust innate to his submission and their command are fulfilling in unique, untouchable ways. Even so, to be the one taking Thanatos apart is indescribable.
Strong, regal Thanatos. He’s so reserved he’s often mistaken to be heartless. Beneath that severe exterior is a man with a limitless capacity to love, this Zagreus knows well. Still, Than is quiet in his affection and shy to express his pleasure. He keeps a tight rein on himself, even in the sanctuary of Zag’s bedroom. So, this display of his lust and need is a rare treasure indeed.
Zag means to draw Than in, but Than combs his fingers through his hair, pinning him with both his touch and his gaze. His eyes—molten gold and raw topaz—are as enchanting as any of Hecate’s spells; Zagreus is helpless to their pull. Than’s other hand, still poised on Zag’s cheek, touching the point where his length distends Zag’s flesh, shifts. He pets over Zag’s skin to the corner of his damp lips where his touch lightens, becoming ghostly.
“Oh,” he whispers, still tracing Zagreus’ lips, hypersensitive and swollen. “Oh, my beloved…”
Whining, Zag laps at his shaft. He’s making an utter mess of himself and he knows it, saliva wetting his chin further. His face burns even as his hole clenches, the humiliation of it perfectly, terribly good.
Than’s head lolls. “I-I… Fuh… Fuck…” He thumbs at Zag’s lower lip. “Fuck, you… you…” He groans, expression pinched. “What did I do to deserve you?” he whispers, voice barely strong enough to reach Zag’s ears.
Zagreus bobs his head, building to taking Than into his throat again. He wants it now more than ever. Wants to push Than over the edge and follow after him only to do it again, to bring Than the same pleasure Than gives him. He wants and wants and wants.
“You—You’re so good to—” Than gasps, weakly kicking out a leg as if he’s utterly lost control. “So warm, it’s so warm, and-and—”
Zag swallows. The little mewl his movements draw from Than is unlike anything he’s heard before. He’s doing this, pulling Thanatos apart at the seams. He’s pushing his love to the brink.
Than’s noises grow breathier. “Uh, uh, uhn… Zah-Zag…” His hands spasm in his hair. “I-I—”
He’s close. He doesn’t need to say it, as it’s written in every line of his body from the clench of his stomach to the knit of his brow. Zagreus did this. Zagreus brought him this pleasure and he’ll only continue to bring him more. His beautiful Thanatos wrecked by his hand.
Zag whimpers, grinding his cock against the bed. Than first—Than will have his pleasure first.
Taking Than until there is nothing left, Zagreus swallows around him, letting his throat clench and strain. Than’s back arches off the bed, yet there’s nowhere for him to go with Zagreus pinning him.
“Za-Za-ah—”
Closing his eyes, Zagreus hums.
With a wail, Thanatos comes. His body stiffens, taut as a bow, and his seed fills Zag’s throat. With each pulse of cum, his cock throbs against Zag’s tongue. Zag tightens his hold on Than’s thighs and the sheets. He takes everything he can. Than’s cry cuts off with a sharp gasp. His hips shudder.
Zagreus continues to suck Than’s cock until he’s making shivering, tender cries, and he’s weakly squirming away, tugging at Zag’s hair in a plea for reprieve. As he slowly, slowly withdraws, he can’t help but give Than’s crown one last messy suck. Than whines and keens, jerking against the sheets. Releasing him, Zag strokes his hips and thighs. He murmurs nothing words, hushing Than’s pained little gasps.
Than is flushed brilliantly, all soft aconite blues and purples. His eyes are glazed and distant. His chest heaves. His hair, like threaded moonlight, clings to his cheeks and forehead. Zagreus did this. Zagreus tore him asunder, brought him apart in the loveliest of ways. And now, he’ll guide him to the surface once more—as Thanatos oft does for him, Zag will ease him back from the heavens with gentle hands and gentler words.
“Darling—Sweetheart… Oh, my love…” He crawls over Than, searching for one of his trembling hands to hold.
Reaching out to him, Than makes a breathless noise that wants to be Zagreus’ name.
“I’m here, I’m here…” Zagreus curls against him, ear pressed to his heart and arm tight at his waist. His pulse is racing—faster than Zag has ever heard it. Zag smiles and strokes his side. “I’m here, beautiful.”
Those trembling hands seek him out, gripping his shoulder, slipping to the back of his neck, interlocking their fingers. To be Than’s anchor fills him with such intense warmth it’s difficult to breathe. He hides his face against Than’s throat, tucking their hands to his breastbone.
The heat in Zag’s abdomen is still there: heavy and impossible to ignore. Still, he does what he can to push it to the back of his mind. He cants his hips, not allowing himself to rut against Than’s thigh despite his need.
He kisses the crook of Than’s neck—first soft, a brush of lips, then a swipe of tongue. “That’s it, sweetheart…” Zagreus strokes his ribs. “Are you all right?”
Than squeezes his hand, laughing breathlessly. “Yes—Darkness, Zagreus, yes. Do you really fear otherwise?” His voice possesses a faint, dreamy quality as if he hasn’t fully returned to himself.
There’s something otherworldly about him, softened as he is. Zag’s thoughts stray to the bounds of Death and Sleep for when Than is like this, so ethereal and hazy, it’s all too easy to picture him as the humans do: adorned with butterflies and poppies, existing somewhere between dream and reality.
“I just want to be sure,” Zag mutters toothlessly.
Nosing against his hair, Than whispers, “It was very… very good.”
Zag can’t help but smile, flushing with his pleasure. “Yeah?”
“It was wonderful, my love.” His fingertips edge into Zag’s hair. “I—Thank you… Thank you.”
Withdrawing, Zag props himself on his elbow so he can admire Than, taking in the glow that’s settled around him. Luminous as he is from his blush to his eyes to his hair, he’d fit in amongst the stars. He’s stunning.
Zag brushes his knuckles over Than’s jaw, smiling when he leans into his touch. “You’re so beautiful,” Zag breathes, choked by emotion. He shakes his head, hardly able to believe the sight before him: Than, celestial in his contentment, relaxed and smiling almost shyly. “The most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”
Than’s eyes widen before flitting to the side. His blush, already so thick, deepens. “Zagreus…” he complains weakly.
“Do you truly hate it?” he asks, wary once more despite the lovely show Than just put on.
He blinks, expression settling into something a little more guarded. It’s a valiant attempt to hide his underbelly, but as flat-footed as his orgasm has left him, it’s hardly as effective as usual. “Hate it?” he echoes, testing it on his tongue.
“My praise.” Zagreus turns his focus to Than’s hair, teasing a strand between his fingertips. Given the mood Than has fallen into, he knows well his direct attention would be too much. “I’ll stop, you know. I’d never wish to make you uncomfortable.”
His lips twitch in what Zag recognizes as one of Than’s aborted frowns. “I told you, you needn’t woo me, Zagreus.”
Pursing his lips, Zagreus considers the pout forming about Than’s mouth and the furrow of his brow. Settling on a course of action, he ducks his head to kiss along Than’s throat. Than releases an indignant huff of breath but tilts his head nevertheless, allowing him further access. Pleased as can be, Zag kisses the hinge of his jaw before nipping at his earlobe. It’s a weak point, and one he’s all too happy to exploit.
Than breathes through his nose sharply, hand finding Zag’s hip. “Zagreus.” His fingers twitch. His grip tightens deliciously.
Zag imagines violet bruises springing to life beneath his fingertips and shivers. He closes his lips around Than’s earlobe and sucks. Than groans, body giving a delightful little jerk. His other hand weaves its way into Zagreus’ hair and takes hold.
“You’re incorrigible.”
Releasing his skin with one last kiss, Zagreus whispers, “Do you not love it, sweetheart? Hearing, finally, the praise you deserve?”
Another shudder racks him. His hand fists in Zag’s hair, pulling just enough that his toes curl against the sheets and his skin sparks ineffectively against the bedding. His cock dribbles precum.
“Zagreus,” Than growls, raw and wanting. “Your honeyed words, however sweet, mean half that of those bitter with truth.”
Frowning, Zag nips again. “I don’t know what you mean, my love. Do you truly think I would lie to you?”
“Lie? No. Fib? Stretch the truth out of kindness? Yes.”
Zagreus makes a small, discontent noise. “You think my praise is all… what? Empty flattery?” His frown deepens. “My love, why would I bed you if I didn’t think you lovelier than the moon and all the stars?”
Than starts to retort only for Zagreus to slide closer, gently locking his leg over Than’s own before pressing his cock to Than’s thigh. The contact is perfect: all soft skin and luxurious heat. He sighs and moans, lips caressing Than’s ear. If he can’t convince Thanatos of his sincerity through words there’s always action, and he’s all too happy to put on a show.
Than’s grip goes slack before steeling once more, urging him closer. He’s still finding his footing, but his hold is sure, and Zagreus is loath to deny him.
“I mean it,” Zagreus pants, messily kissing whatever skin he can. “You’re gorgeous. You’re—” He grinds against Than’s thigh, spreading his precum across his skin. “Oh… You’re beautiful…”
“I’ll give you your pleasure,” Than growls, hand moving from his hip to clutch at Zagreus’ ass, nails biting ember crescents into his flesh. “You don’t have to butter me up.”
Zagreus drags his nails across Than’s chest in return, teeth sharp at the edge of his ear. It tears a cry like burning coals and concrete from him. His body arches with it, bucking against Zagreus’ hold mindlessly. Where it rests between stomach and hip, his cock makes a valiant attempt to ready once more.
“Now you’re just insulting me.” Zagreus tries to sound teasing, but there’s an edge of hurt he can’t conceal. “Thanatos, you fool…” He gives Than’s nipple piercing a gentle tug for good measure, delighting in his whimper despite the rawness Than’s words have left him with. “You gorgeous, lovely fool.”
“Blood and darkness, Zag, I—”
“You’re beautiful—inside and out, Thanatos, you’re beautiful.”
Than presses his cheek to Zagreus’. His breath is harsh and uneven. Zagreus can feel how tense his jaw is.
The ice building in Zag’s chest, heavy and sharp with his anxiety, melts away. “Oh, darling…” he croaks and wraps his arm around Than’s neck. “Did you really not see? You’re so very lovely to me. Please know these words are true, through and through. And I’m sorry—I’ve clearly failed you given all this time you’ve spent thinking otherwise.”
In response, Than whimpers, lips parted against Zag’s skin as if he wants to speak but can’t stand the thought of it. “I-I’m sorry,” he whispers finally, voice ticked up like he’s unsure it’s what he meant to say at all. “I shouldn’t have lashed out like that. I don’t think you a liar. It’s just… as potently as I experience such words, at times it’s as if you’ve reached inside me and found every tender spot I fight to shield. As wonderful as it can feel, it also…” He releases a shaky breath. Quieter still, he confesses, “It also scares me. It can be like a balm or like a careless touch to an open wound. Those sweet words bring me both immense pleasure and… a sense of anxiety I cannot begin to explain.”
Zagreus takes it in, eyes closed, focused wholly upon each word. From his heart and lungs to his clenched stomach and trembling fingertips, he burns with his love. He experiences the pain in Than’s voice as if it’s his own and that pain only grows as he resists the urge to touch him, to soothe what hurts he can. But to soothe Thanatos requires a careful hand. At times, Zagreus has proven too passional for the task, impulsively charging ahead as he is wont to do. But those past mistakes have taught him a great deal, and so he will restrain himself, tempering his instinctual drive to act. This is the consideration Than both needs and deserves.
“Is it something specific I’ve said or done? Something I assume to be kind but grates on you?”
Than groans. “No, no… That’s not it. It’s… It’s not you.” He grits the words out as if each is wrenched from the depths of his being, tasting of blood and bile. “It’s not something you have done or failed to do it is… it is as if, within me…” He releases a shuddering breath.
“A part of you doubts my words?”
“Yes… And yet, Zagreus, I would trust you with my life!” There is a wetness to his voice as if he is near tears and it seizes Zagreus’ heart further, each hitch of breath adding a link to the chain steadily winding about it, coiling tighter and tighter. “I trust you above all others. I know you have no reason to tease me or deride me or my feelings on the matter, but… the way that I feel… I can’t help but hear it as such.”
Zagreus nuzzles against Than’s cheek. “And how is it that you feel, my love?”
Than grunts, nosing against Zag’s cheek in turn as if he can somehow hide. “Unworthy,” he says in hushed tones. “Undeserving of such praise.”
“Darling… There are few I can name who deserve as much recognition as you. I-I don’t even know where to begin, there’s so much I could say of your heart alone.”
A pained little whine is punched from Than’s chest. He twists, doing his best to burrow his face between Zag’s shoulder and neck. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what’s come over me.”
“Don’t you dare apologize,” Zag chides. “Than… Than, my love, to me you are… you are so precious. So very dear to me! I hold you close to my heart—you are my heart—you and Megaera, two halves of a whole. I love you, Thanatos.”
His breath catches and his clutching hands score golden-hot lines across his back. “And I love you… I love you so…”
“The glory of your soul is so great it outshines all else, but your outward beauty is an aspect of you and thus a facet of my love for you all the same.” Zagreus holds his shuddering form closer. He must swallow down the lump forming in his throat to speak. “I’ll do anything I can to help you, you know. Anything, my beloved.”
Zag cradles the back of his head, gentle as can be. With easy strokes to his hair and whispered, lost words, he coaxes Than back so he can look at him. Than’s eyes are even glassier now, maybe a little damp.
“There you are… My darling Thanatos,” he croons. He cups his face between his hands and strokes his cheeks. “Now, what can I do for you? Are you tired? If you’d like, I could draw you a warm bath. You still have those salts, yes? The lavender ones? I could add that and-and…” He takes a deep breath. He’s babbling. It’s a lousy habit and it makes him hyperaware of how very eloquent Thanatos is in comparison.
“Zag…”
“I just… I just want to please you. You make me so very happy and… it would be such a shame if I couldn’t give you some happiness in turn.”
“You do. Of course, you do…” His hands flutter about, fingertips brushing his temple soft as a butterfly’s wings before stroking the hair just behind his ear. “I just—” He sighs. “Don’t worry over me too much, all right?”
Zagreus chuckles. “No promises, but… I’ll try my best not to smother you.”
“That’s not what I meant,” he’s quick to say. “It’s not that your doting bothers me. I just… I don’t want to stress you.”
When Than was young, he was quite shy. He’d often duck away when Zag caught his gaze—that is, if he didn’t disappear entirely. He would stutter over his words where they are now so steady and sure. It’s been such a long time since Zagreus saw that side of him that he thought it was gone entirely, but it appears now in the dip of his lashes and his petal-bright flush.
“Oh?” Zagreus grins from ear to ear. “Is that so?”
“Don’t tease me,” he mutters.
“I don’t mean to mock your feelings. I-I’m overjoyed,” he laughs, petting Than’s hair back from his forehead. “I’m delighted, Than. I want to fawn over you—I enjoy it.”
Than’s blush builds into a lurid swipe of amethyst across his cheeks. “Don’t you—Ah, that is, don’t you…?”
Zagreus hums, encouraging him quietly. “What is it, dearest?”
“Well, I suppose the mood has… shifted, but would you…?”
“There’s no pressure, my love,” Zag reassures him. “I, ah, well.” His smile softens. “I always have my hand, to be blunt.”
Than snorts, shaking off his bout of nerves. “It’s an invitation, Zag.”
“Oh!” Zag’s heart lurches in his chest. He feels almost dizzy, his flush is so fierce.
Smile soft and secret, Than whispers, “Show me, won’t you? All of that… beauty you see in me. Show me how it makes you want me.”