Saefe_07



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    Ilya laughed.

    “That bothered you?”

    ”You have no idea. Half the time I use the tiny scraps of information you give me to look them up anyway. But you’re so cryptic. You’re like,” Shane put on a little voice, “‘Ah, we might have a layover in Charlotte, but am not sure, could be Atlanta.’ Infurating.”

    ”Ok, Hollander, I will send you a calendar invite. This is seductive to you, yes?”

    It’s been months since the cottage, and Shane is finally coming to visit Ilya. He hasn’t been back in Boston since the day he ran out the door saying he couldn’t do this. Ilya is spiraling, just a little, not knowing where they stand in this new and fragile thing. Boyfriends, probably. He’s never been someone’s boyfriend before.

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    19 Apr 2026

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    “So,” Ilya says, dragging the word out. He’s swiping at non-existent crumbs on the counter, avoiding his eyes. “You have dinner at parents on Christmas, yes?” 

    “Yeah.” 

    Ilya nods. “I can house-sit while you are away. Make place pretty, if you have decorations. Make it less boring.” 

    Shane’s eyebrows fly up. “What? You don’t want to come with?” 

    Finally, Ilya looks up at him. Hesitantly, he asks, “You want me to come with?” 

    Frowning, Shane says, “I– yeah. Yeah, of course. You think I invited you here just so you could spend Christmas alone?” 

    Looking away, Ilya shrugs. “I am intruder here, Hollander. You have family. I do not. Makes situation… difficult, maybe. You forget the world thinks we are rivals.” 

    “Not difficult,” Shane says immediately. “You want to come, you’re coming.” 

    Or: Ilya's in Montreal alone during the week leading up to the Winter Classic. Shane doesn't let him spend Christmas alone.

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    19 Apr 2026

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    It’s not going viral because Jane’s true identity was exposed—or even because Ilya was blatantly sexting in public. That part’s as expected as Shane doing yoga or any human being on earth breathing.

    No, the texts are going viral because no one can believe how bad this “Jane” is at sexting.

    The women of the world are outraged. The men of the world are baffled. No one can understand why Ilya Rozanov, whose abs have their own fan club, is wasting his time on ‘a piece of cardboard that wished to be turned into a real girl’ (this particular joke has 300k likes and counting).

    Or: After a social media trend mocks Shane's sexting skills, he tries to improve them. It goes about as poorly as you'd expect.

    Now available in Russian

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    06 Apr 2026

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