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Generally speaking, Frank doesn’t give a fuck what others think about him. He stopped caring about what was “socially acceptable” years ago. He’s loud and aggressive, so far from “feminine” that nobody was surprised when he came out. In the early morning hours of a random Tuesday with only the moonlight as their guide, Gerard cut a haphazard mullet into Frank’s hair, and with one look in the mirror, Frank knew he’d made the right decision. He was introducing himself as “Frank” to people a week later, and never looked back.
His parents took slightly longer to catch on, but his friends were supportive immediately. Frank pretended not to care about the hateful insults and crass words, but if he was being truthful, they stung. It helped to know his friends were always by his side, though. They were ready to defend him at all times, without question. Mikey was always at the forefront. As non-threatening and awkward as he was, he was never afraid to jump a bigot who got too loud.
Frank is comfortable. That’s what he tells himself, his friends, his therapist, and anyone else who asks. He just feels behind. He spent his formative years figuring out who he was instead of being a “normal” teenager. And whenever he did go to parties, people kept their distance. Frank was used to being the first transgender person most people in the town had ever met. People loved to treat him like some otherworldly creature, though, and that didn't generally lead to many opportunities for things like dating.
And that’s how he’s a twenty-two-year-old, college dropout virgin.
He knows he’s the last virgin left in his friend group. He couldn’t have expected a group of teenage boys to keep quiet about their sexual experiences. He knows Mikey was first, and he knows that his girlfriend’s mom caught them as he was cumming. He knows the prom queen puked on Gerard’s dick and “awoke something in him”. He knows Ray is the most experienced of them all.
Even beyond that, if the rumors are anything to go by, he knows Ray’s good in bed. Shit, it isn’t even rumors at this point. After Ray dragged away a random girl at their joint graduation party, high-bass house music and a cedar wood door were not enough to keep screams of pleasure from reaching Frank’s ears. When Ray emerged nearly an hour later, Frank pretended to be oblivious. One benefit of not having a dick meant nobody knew just how turned on he was. That was between him and his vibrator later that night, long after the party had died, squirming on the same mattress Ray took the girl apart on hours earlier.
So, maybe he’s jealous. Maybe he’s curious. Maybe he’s desperate. Maybe he’s tired of feeling like he’s missing something. Maybe he’s so fucking pent up that he’s afraid he’ll explode if nobody touches him in the next twenty-four hours. Maybe he’s sick of his own fingers and a stupid wand vibrator he bought from Spencer’s.
Maybe he wants more.
He rolls over onto his stomach, pressing his cheek against the mattress. His eyes flicker over his cell phone screen, bright in the otherwise dark room.
to: toro ☠️
can i come over?
Frank has written, deleted, and rewritten the message a thousand times. He’s not sure what to say now and what to say later. He’s not sure what to say at all.
He presses send.
It’s late now, nearly midnight. He knows Ray is on Spring Break, so he isn’t entirely surprised when a response comes quickly.
from: toro☠️
Sure 👍
from: toro☠️
Everything okay?
to: toro ☠️
yea i’m good
to: toro ☠️
have an idea i want to pitch you
Frank rolls out of bed and searches blindly for his shoes. He’s too lazy to put on the light and pays for it when he trips over a stray phone charger on the hardwood.
from: toro☠️
Oh. About a song?
Frank snorts.
to: toro ☠️
not quite
to: toro ☠️
see you in ten
*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Ray squints at him. He won’t ask Frank to repeat himself for a third time, but he’s certainly tempted to. “Let me get this straight,” he says. “You…are you asking me to fuck you?”
Frank shrugs. “If you want.”
“No, that wasn’t the question.”
Frank huffs. “I’m so sick of being the only virgin, man. It fucking sucks. I’m tired of it.”
“There’s nothing wrong with being a virgin, Frank. You’re still so young. It’s perfectly healthy.” Ray says, sounding like every "real adult" he's ever tried to have this conversation with.
Frank groans. “I know that. Everyone fucking says that. But, it’s just…nobody wants me, Ray. I’m gonna die a fucking virgin at this rate, man.”
“That’s just not true, Frank.” Ray shakes his head. He leans back on his hands, the mattress dipping below him as he stares at Frank standing in front of him. “You’re a very attractive man.”
“A very attractive trans man.” Frank corrects. “And that turns off, like, 96% of Belleville.”
Ray sighs. He runs a hand through his hair. “If we’re going to do this…we’re going to do it my way. Do you understand?”
Frank frowns. “What’s that mean?”
“It means you are going to listen to me, first of all. It means we’re going to take things slow—”
“I'll be fine.”
“...because I don’t want to hurt you.” Ray continues despite Frank’s interruption. He narrows his eyes at him, making Frank’s stomach flip. “And it means that you need to promise me that if you ever want to stop, or want anything to change, you'll tell me.”
“Yup,” Frank nods. “Promise,”
Ray rolls his eyes. “I’m not doing this if you’re not going to take it seriously.”
“Oh, I’m so serious,” Frank says, tracing an X over his heart with his index finger. “Kiss me?”
Ray sighs. “Eager as fuck, aren’t you? Jesus. Come here.”
Frank sinks into Ray’s lap easily. His thighs part, legs draping over either side of Ray’s. He wraps his arms around Ray’s neck and laces his fingers at the base of his skull. He swears he can hear Ray’s heart racing. “Am I…” Frank swallows. “Am I, like, forcing you to do this?”
Ray shakes his head vehemently. “No, no, not at all. I just want to make sure you’re okay.”
Frank hums. He tilts his head up and places a kiss on Ray’s cheek. “I trust you. You’ll take good care of me.”
Ray’s hands find his waist and squeeze. “I will,” he says. “Are you on birth control?”
Frank shrugs. “I’m, like, on hormones and stuff. You know that.”
Ray shakes his head. “And I also know that you’re still fertile on testosterone. It isn’t a substitute for birth control.”
“Wait, really?”
Ray groans. “Seriously, Frank? Are you trying to get pregnant?”
“Ew, no.” Frank cringes.
“Then you need to think about these things. If you’re going to be fucking around with people, I suggest you get an IUD.”
“Hey, who says I’m going to be fucking around?”
“Frank, I’ve known you for years. I’m not fucking stupid.” Ray rolls his eyes. “You’re losing your virginity just for the Hell of it. I’m not going to be able to take you anywhere after this.”
“Fine, fine,” Frank rolls his eyes. He knows Ray is right, and he won’t try to pretend otherwise. “Do you at least have condoms?”
Ray smirks. “Of course, I do. Unlike you, I am always prepared.”
Frank swallows down the sarcastic comment he wants to let out. Instead, he places a hand on each of Ray’s cheeks and drags him down into a kiss. Frank moans against his lips as they make contact. It’s soft and tender for only a brief moment before Frank parts his lips. Ray’s tongue worms its way into his mouth as one of his large hands comes to cradle Frank’s skull. The taste of Ray’s vanilla chapstick is immediately overpowered by the tobacco clinging to Frank’s teeth.
Frank whimpers. Ray’s hand slides under his shirt. His fingers run over the sleek fabric of Frank’s binder, clinging to him like a second skin. Ray grabs the hem, bundling up the fabric in his fist, until—
Frank breaks the kiss. “Hang on, hang on,” he says. He shoves Ray harder than he means to, and both of the other man’s hands are off of him immediately. “I don’t…I want…”
“Breathe,” Ray says. He tries to keep his voice calm, but Frank can hear the undertone of panic. “You’re okay. What happened?”
Frank swallows. “Don’t…I want to keep my shirt on.”
Embarrassment washes over Ray like a flood. His cheeks light up bright red. “Oh,” he says. “Oh, yeah, of course. You don’t…you can keep it on. I’m sorry, I wasn’t—”
“It’s fine,” Frank shakes his head. “It’s fine, just…try not to touch my chest too much, please.”
“Understood,” Ray nods. “Are you alright?”
“Yeah,” He kisses Ray on the cheek. “Thank you. Sorry for getting all weird on you.”
“No, don’t apologize.” Ray shakes his head. “You did the right thing. I want you to be comfortable.”
“You’re sweet,” Frank smiles. He allows Ray to guide him to lie back on the mattress. Ray kneels between his spread legs. Frank can see the boner he’s desperately trying to ignore straining at the fabric of his pajama shorts.
Ray runs his hand along the outside of Frank’s thigh. “Can I touch you?” he asks.
Frank blinks up at him with big eyes. His thighs twitch with the force of keeping them open. “Touch? Like…”
Ray’s mouth moves faster than his brain. He’s speaking before he can even think about it. “Let me eat you out.”
“You…you want to do that?”
“I’d fucking love to,” Ray nods. “If you’d let me.”
“Oh, I’ll let you,” Frank says, a little too eagerly. “I just…I always thought that guys didn’t like doing that sort of thing.”
“Any guy unwilling to eat pussy isn’t worthy of being called a man.” Ray says. “And they’re most definitely not worthy of sleeping with you.”
“Damn. Sounds like you’re pretty passionate about that.”
“I am,” Ray says. He tugs on Frank’s waistband. “Now, lift your hips.”
It takes only a few seconds for Frank to be completely naked below the waist. Frank tilts his head back, focusing on the ceiling tiles rather than Ray’s reaction to his body. He hears Ray gasp and prays that it denotes a positive emotion.
“Fuck,” Ray curses. “Jesus. You…you’re fucking soaked, Frank.”
Frank throws an arm over his eyes. “Is it really that obvious?”
“Absolutely,” Ray nods. “Don’t be shy. Anyone should want to see you this wet when they get your pants off.”
Ray grabs the underside of Frank’s knees and pushes them back towards his chest. Frank’s hips burn with the stretch, but he stays in position once Ray lets go. At this angle, Ray watches with complete fascination as Frank’s pussy glimmers in the light. He is clean-shaven, and Ray can see the tip of his t-dick poking out from between his labia when he looks closely. Ray runs his thumb across the juncture where Frank’s thigh meets his pelvis. “I could fucking stare at you all day, and it still wouldn’t be long enough,” he says.
Frank groans. “Take a picture, it’ll last longer.”
“Don’t tempt me.”
“Maybe later,” Frank says. “For now, I’d really like it if you’d get your fucking mouth on me.”
Ray hums. He leans down and places a kiss on Frank’s knee. “Have you ever had anything inside you before?”
“Just my fingers,” Frank answers.
“Not like a dildo, or anything?”
Should he be embarrassed?
“No,”
“Alright, well,” Ray sighs, shifting to get comfortable on the mattress. This time, when he speaks, his hot breath dances over Frank’s oversensitive parts. “If anything starts hurting, tell me, and I’ll stop immediately.”
“Promise,” Frank nods.
Ray smiles up at him. “Good boy,”
Frank doesn’t have time even to begin to formulate a response. Ray leans in and latches his mouth around Frank’s t-dick. He hollows his cheeks, and a jolt of electricity shoots through Frank’s entire body. He twitches. “Oh, fuck,”
Ray pulls back and licks a stripe up the length of Frank’s cunt. “Just relax,” he mutters. “Let me make you feel good.”
Frank whines and tilts his hips up towards Ray’s face. Ray dives in. His mouth is seemingly everywhere at once—sucking on his t-dick, licking over his folds, dipping inside of his hole. It doesn’t take long before Frank is squirming desperately on the mattress. He grabs a handful of Ray’s hair and uses the grip to shove Ray’s face further into him.
Ray feels like he can hardly breathe. He decides that suffocating in Frank’s pussy isn’t a halfway bad way to die, and doubles down.
Ray allows himself to glance upward at Frank. He groans into his flesh at the sight that greets him. Frank is wriggling on the mattress, desperation strangling the life out of him. His face is bright red, and sweat adheres his hair to his forehead. Bitten-red lips are parted, allowing a chorus of whiny moans to fill the air.
He looks fucking gorgeous.
Ray latches his mouth around Frank’s t-dick as he slides a finger into his entrance. Frank hisses, but it quickly turns into a moan. Ray pumps his finger slowly, allowing Frank to get used to the intrusion. He’s clearly larger than what Frank is used to. Discomfort is inevitable, but Ray is doing his best to minimize the amount that Frank feels.
It doesn’t take long for Ray to add a second finger. Once he does, he curls them immediately, searching for the perfect spot nestled deep inside of Frank. He knows he has found it when Frank’s back arches off the bed with a shout. He tugs on Ray’s hair hard enough to make his scalp burn. “Ah!” he moans. “Oh, fuck, Ray—”
“I’ve got you,” Ray says. The words are half-lost as he refuses to take his mouth off of Frank loud enough to speak.
Frank bucks his hips. Ray allows him to ride his face, flattening his tongue to make the slide easier. The younger man moves wildly, twisting and grinding as he soaks the lower half of Ray’s face. Ray’s free hand grabs the outside of Frank’s thigh. The fingers buried in his cunt press with calculated intention. Each nudge of fingertips sends pleasure coursing through Frank’s veins.
“Fuck,” Frank curses. “Shit, gonna…gonna, Ray, if you don’t—”
The warning is pointless. Frank couldn’t stop his orgasm if he wanted to. He grasps Ray’s skull with both hands and shoves him down so that his nose collides with Frank’s pelvis. Ray latches his mouth back around Frank’s t-dick and sucks as if his life depends on it. Frank continues humping Ray’s mouth as his orgasm rockets through him. His thighs tremble at the sides of Ray’s face. His pussy clenches tightly around Ray’s fingers until all he can manage are small twitches and steady pressure against his g-spot.
Slowly, the muscles in Frank’s body relax. He releases his vice grip on Ray’s fingers, and his legs fall back against the mattress. Frank’s panting is the loudest sound in the room. Ray shushes him softly, running a soothing hand across his lower stomach.
Frank isn't sure how long he's floating for, but eventually, Ray starts to sound less and less like he’s underwater. “...did such a good job. God, you’re so good. Such a good boy, Frank. Thank you for letting me do that. Tasted so fucking good, baby, fuck. Thank you, thank you, thank you.”
When Frank blinks open, Ray is smiling up at him from between his legs. He has sucked a hickey into the side of Frank’s left hip. His hair is a mess, and his lips and chin are shiny with the remnants of Frank’s cum.
Frank thinks he’s the hottest thing he’s ever seen.
“Kiss me, kiss me,” he pleads.
Ray blinks, clearly surprised. “Are you…are you sure? I can—”
“Ray, if your mouth is not on mine in the next four seconds, I swear to God.”
Ray doesn’t need more convincing. He crawls forward and leans down to slot his lips with Frank’s. Frank’s tongue is inside his mouth immediately. He licks over every inch of Ray’s mouth like a deranged man. He sucks on Ray’s tongue like he can force his own juices to the surface of his tastebuds and swallow them down. The taste of himself is heady and strong, unlike anything he’s ever experienced before.
“Fuck me,” Frank pants into his mouth. “Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me, fuck—”
“Slow down,” Ray interrupts. “We’ve got time. Slow down, slow down.”
His mouth is still on Ray’s when he threatens, “I’m going to get up and go to the bar down the street and find some random man to fuck me in the alley.”
“No, you won’t.”
“Wanna bet?” Frank taunts. He pulls back far enough to look into Ray’s eyes. “I’m okay, I promise. I want this.” he pauses and reaches down to cup Ray’s erection through his bottoms. Ray hisses, and Frank smirks. “And I know you do, too.”
It’s beyond difficult to focus with Frank’s hand on his cock. It’s even worse when Frank dips below his waistband and wraps his fingers around Ray’s member. Ray groans. “You’re going to fucking kill me.”
“Please, Ray,” Frank begs. “Please, I want this. God, I can’t begin to tell you how much I want this. How much I want you.”
“You have me,” Ray says.
Frank smiles. Ray flushes as the implications of those words dawn on him. Before he can take them back, Frank is speaking again. “I sure do, don’t I?” he teases. “Come on, Ray. Please.”
Ray sighs. He kisses Frank’s cheek before reaching over to grab a condom from the drawer of his bedside table. “I need you to listen to me,” he says. He pauses long enough for Frank to argue, and when he doesn’t, continues. “It…it’s probably gonna hurt a bit. I’m gonna do everything in my power to make it as comfortable as possible for you, but please, if you need a break or anything, tell me. I want…I want this to be good for you.”
Frank pulls him down into a brief kiss. “It’s been amazing so far,” he says sincerely. “I promise I’ll tell you if I need anything.”
“Good boy,” Ray says and kisses Frank’s jaw.
Every time those two words leave Ray’s mouth, something lights up inside of Frank. A rush of red-hot arousal takes over him, consuming all the available space in his chest cavity. It gives him a headrush, a flood of endorphins washing over his brain. When he dies and goes to Heaven (or…hopefully), he hopes that’s the first thing he’s greeted with—the sound of Ray Toro calling him a “good boy.”
Ray strips quickly. He is so turned on that he has to pause and take deep breaths when he’s putting on the condom so he doesn’t immediately bust inside of Frank. Frank smiles as he watches Ray fumble in his awkward haste. It’s endearing seeing how eager he is. How desperate he is to be inside of him.
Ray shifts back onto his knees once again. “Are you comfortable like this?” he asks.
“Mhm,” Frank nods. “Want to be able to see you.”
“You’re sweet,” Ray says, and Frank smiles. “I know you’re sick of hearing it, but I’m going to say it again. If you need anything at all, stop and tell me. We can decide that this is over at any point. You’re not required to do this if you don’t want to.”
“And neither are you,” Frank says. “You don’t have to do this just because I want it.”
“Oh, trust me,” Ray chuckles. “I want to, Frank. Believe me, I want to.”
Frank grins. “Then do it.”
One of Ray’s hands rubs soothing patterns across Frank’s lower stomach as the other grips the base of his cock. Slowly, he inches forward until just the head pops past the ring at Frank’s entrance. Frank’s eyes are closed, and Ray would heavily prefer he could see the emotion swimming in his pupils, but he won’t press the issue further. At this point, it’s all about whatever is going to make Frank the most comfortable.
Ray slides forward another inch. Frank’s face contorts, and he inhales sharply through his nostrils. Ray shushes softly. “Breathe,” he mutters. “Breathe, you’re okay.”
“Mhm,” Frank nods in a tone that doesn’t sound convincing. “Just need a second.”
“Take your time,” Ray says. He takes advantage of the break to take a deep breath of his own. Frank is warm and impossibly tight around him. His thigh muscles twitch, and Ray trails his hand downward to squeeze the flesh there.
When Frank gives him permission to do so, Ray moves again. He gets about halfway in before Frank chokes out a strangled, “Wait,” that stops him in his tracks. He studies Frank carefully as he rubs his hip comfortingly.
He still really, really wishes he could see Frank’s eyes.
It’s a slow, steady, and long process before Ray’s cock is fully inside Frank. He’s patient through it all. He stops when asked, he mutters comforting words, he tells Frank he’s doing a good job. He tries to think of anything that isn’t his own orgasm and how incredible Frank feels around him; he’s slightly less successful at that.
Frank whimpers. “It hurts,”
“I know it does, baby.” Ray pouts. “You’re being so good for me.”
Frank blinks open. His eyes are wet with unshed tears. It takes him a few seconds to focus on Ray’s face, but when he does, his entire body softens. Ray is smiling down at him so tenderly, like Frank is the only thing that matters in this world. Like he wouldn’t want to be anywhere else besides right here, right now. Truthfully, that’s pretty close to the truth. Ray never considered the possibility of having Frank like this an option. Now that it’s happening, he’s half tempted to chain Frank to the bedpost and never let him go.
When Frank encourages him to do so, Ray rolls his hips and curses. He’s trying unbelievably hard to keep himself contained. At the end of the day, he can only be expected to behave so much. Every time he pulls out, Frank draws him back in, like he doesn’t ever want this to end.
“Good boy,” Ray praises. “Keep breathing for me. Just relax. It’ll start feeling good soon, I promise.”
Together, guided by the small sounds of pleasure that start to escape Frank’s lips, the pair settles into a steady rhythm. Ray’s large member still hurts when it gets too deep and nudges Frank’s cervix, but Frank adjusts the angle with the shift of his hips each time. In comparison to Ray, Frank is rather small, so it’s hard to avoid the discomfort entirely. Ray makes a conscious effort to make Frank feel as good as possible, though. He’s extra mindful of each of his thrusts, trying his best to bring Frank only pleasure and no pain.
Frank grabs Ray’s hand and shoves it between his legs. Ray snickers. His thumb presses down against the head of Frank’s t-dick. “Is this what you want?”
Frank whines. “Fuck yes,”
Ray sucks his cheeks in and spits over Frank’s pussy. He uses the extra lubrication to slick his hand as he brackets Frank’s t-dick with his index and middle fingers. It takes a minute to get the angle of his strokes correct, but he knows when he does. Frank bucks his hips desperately, forcing Ray deeper with each thrust. Ray can’t tell if Frank’s whimpers are from distress or pleasure. He trusts Frank to continue communicating his needs with him, though, so he doesn’t stop. He jerks off Frank like he would touch his own cock as he increases the speed of his thrusts.
“Fuck, baby,” Ray gasps. “God, you’re so fucking tight. You feel…you feel fucking incredible, baby, shit—”
Frank sounds like he’s sobbing, and when Ray manages to rip his gaze away from Frank’s cunt, he confirms there are tears on his cheeks. “Please, Ray,” he cries.
“I’ve got you,” he pants. “Frank, baby, I’m not…I’m not gonna last very long, I—”
“Kiss me,” Frank demands. Before Ray can even process the request, Frank grabs him by the throat and pulls him forward. They meet with such fervor that their teeth clash. Frank shoves his tongue into Ray’s mouth insistently.
Ray hooks one of his arms under Frank’s waist and shifts his positioning. A disgustingly hot sound, something crossed between a sob and a shout, rips free from Frank’s throat. Frank’s nails dig into Ray’s back, leaving behind crescent-shaped marks that will last for days.
Ray grunts. “Baby, I’m not…”
“Keep touching me like that, and I won’t either.”
“Am I…” Ray can hardly get the words out, so consumed by pleasure. “Am I hurting you?”
“It’s okay,” Frank insists. It’s not really an answer, but Ray doesn’t have it in him to push further. Frank clenches down around him, and Ray sinks his teeth into the side of his neck and cums harder than he ever has before. Frank’s whimpers are loud in his ear, and when Ray tightens his fingers around Frank’s t-dick, he can tell by the flutter of his walls that he’s cumming, too.
They stay stuck together for a period of time that borders on too long before Frank starts to whine from overstimulation. Ray kisses over the accidental bruise he’s left behind and pulls out. Below him, Frank looks absolutely fucked out. His overworked thigh muscles twitch as Ray lowers his legs back down to the mattress. His chest rises and falls rapidly as he struggles to catch his breath. His cunt is obviously swollen, and Ray thumbs through his slit just to watch the way he flinches.
Ray discards his condom before he leans forward and places a kiss behind Frank’s ear. He keeps his voice soft and intentional as he says, “Hey, it’s okay. You’re safe. You did such a good job for me, baby. I’m so proud of you.”
Frank hums. He reaches out blindly and only relaxes when Ray laces their fingers together. “Thank you,” he says. “Thank you for everything.”
“You don’t need to thank me. I should be the one thanking you.” Ray insists. “You did so good, Frank. I hope I didn’t hurt you too badly.”
“It’s okay,” Frank shrugs. “I was kind of expecting it to hurt anyway. You took good care of me, and that’s all I could’ve asked for.”
“You did amazing.”
“You felt amazing,” Frank says. “I’m going to be dreaming about your mouth on me forever. I hope you know that.”
“Good,” Ray says, nosing along Frank’s neck. “You'd better figure out something for birth control, by the way. Ideally, soon.”
Frank frowns. “Why?”
Ray smiles. He pushes up on his elbows so he can look into Frank’s eyes as he says, “Because I want to creampie you next time.”
Frank grins. “Well, shit,” he says. “That sounds like a fucking great idea to me.”