Chapter Text
I woke up disoriented to a heavy weight pressing down on my chest.
“OH GO—”
A hand clapped over my mouth, sloppily cutting my words off. The panic that was clawing at me was briefly interrupted by a grimace as a finger slipped into my mouth; whoever was trying to cover my mouth was clearly having difficulty as I squirmed beneath their grip.
That only lasted a heartbeat before the panic came back. I had had too damn much of mysterious figures trying to accost me while I was unconscious this week! I sure as fuck wasn't going to let someone abduct me again.
I was mentally hovering over my Protective Shield spell when the stench hit me, every ounce of memory flooding back with it.
It was pure, nostril-searing alcohol, obscured by the vaguest hint of something fruity. It smelled like the time Bea had invited some of her sorority friends over and I had watched them pour bottle after bottle of vodka, everclear and — for some godforsaken reason that still baffled me to this day — gin into the punch bowl, finishing it off with a single bottle of strawberry lemonade.
Honestly, it was a miracle none of them had ended up in the hospital, but that was besides the point. What mattered right now was that that smell made it obvious exactly who was on top of me.
I wasn’t proud of what I did next, but sometimes, you just had to go with ol’ reliable.
I licked across the palm, flattening my tongue to let saliva pool upon it, making sure to get as much of the skin as possible. Licked into the space between his fingers, tracing across that ticklish bit of webbing. Immature as fuck; the sort of thing you’d see on an elementary school playground, but hey.
If it works, it works.
“Mordecai, what the fuck?!” I hissed as the man yanked his hand away.
(I decided it would be better for both of us if I pretended that I hadn’t heard the noise he made in the process)
Now that I was properly awake, I realized the room wasn’t as dark as I had initially thought. It was the same Safe Room bedroom I had fallen asleep in. Most of the space was obscured by Mordecai’s wings, arched high over me like a hawk protecting its prey (Ugh, bad mental image), but off to one side, I could still see the shape of Donut’s towering cat tree peaking over the edge of a wing.
Oh, fuck.
I strained my ears, trying to hear if Donut had woken up, but all I could hear was her quiet snores, Mongo’s own strange trilling snore occasionally interrupting them.
Okay.
Back to the problem at hand.
The problem that was currently—
“Jesus Christ,” I muttered, wondering what the fuck I’d done to deserve this.
Okay, sure, I was aware that Mordecai was, well, as some people would say, slangin’ it — our visit to the first Safe Room on this floor had made me entirely too knowledgeable about that — but.
Damn.
Where the fuck did the guy buy his pants?
I quickly ushered that specific train of thought out of my mind. Definitely not what I needed to be worried about right now. Or ever, really. I'd been trying too hard to get the memory of what Mordecai was packing out of my mind for all of that work to be undone now.
“Mordecai,” I tried again, hissing the word under my breath. Goddamnit, just how fucking plastered was the guy? “Mordecai, this isn’t your room.”
Talking to a brick wall would have been more effective.
Actually, it might even have been preferable, because at least a brick wall wouldn’t be trying to fasten its mouth on my throat, going for that spot right below the corner of my jaw that always—
“Okay. Okay. Yeah, no, we’re not fucking doing this.” I wasn’t entirely sure who I was trying to convince with that one. “C’mon, up you go. Let’s get you back to your own bed.”
If there was one thing I could give this dungeon credit for, it was that my newly enhanced stats really could be useful sometimes. Turns out that it’s a whole lot easier to get a drunk bastard to where they need to be if you can physically pick the dude up.
God, if only I’d been able to do this back when I’d been in the Coast Guard. I could have avoided a whole host of problems if I had just been able to haul my buddies out of that one bar we had visited on shore leave.
I did my best to quietly shimmy out from underneath him and clamber up to my feet.
The actual sound level of my actions was more like I'd shoved that entire undead circus into this room, but Donut was still snoring away by the time I had both of us on our feet (at least for a given definition of the term). Thank God for that. The last thing I wanted to be doing tonight was to explain to her why Mordecai's hands kept insistently creeping towards my BigBoi Boxers.
“C'mon,” I muttered again, wrapping an arm around Mordecai's waist and slinging one of his own over my shoulders. Our height difference forced him onto his toes as we stumbled forward, but it wasn't like he could carry a whole lot of his weight on his feet right now anyways.
As far as things went, it honestly wasn't my worst experience dragging a drunk friend home. Sure, the bastard was way more grabby than anybody I'd known back in those days, but it wasn't like this was the first time a drunk guy'd hit on me. He honestly wasn't even that hard to pick up. The wings made it a little awkward, but it definitely beat dragging a guy my size back to the boat.
Also, he wasn't vomiting, so I sure fucking didn't plan on complaining. I knew when to count my victories.
I'm not entirely sure how we made it down the little hall to his room without any issues, but somehow, we did.
(In hindsight, I really should have realized this was a trap marked as obnoxiously as that neon Tutorial Guild sign we'd run into when we first entered the dungeon)
“I'm just gonna drop you by your bed so that you can sleep this o—”
My words got cut off by the sound of Mordecai's door closing. A cold shiver ran down my spine, an out-of-place sense of foreboding that I didn't have time to investigate.
Mordecai broke free of my grip, suddenly standing on his own two feet. Fuck, he was stronger than I expected. I didn't stand a chance as he crowded against me, sending me stumbling backwards one step, two, shoving until my back was pressed against something solid.
Pinning me against the wall with his own body, he reached down, pushing aside the waistband of my BigBoi Boxers, and wrapped his hand around my—
[NEW ACHIEVEMENT] Two-Pump Chump
Description: Is it a magical effect that left you in a hurry or do you just fucking suck? Ha! Who are you kidding, we all know you just fucking suck. Not even in the fun way!
Reward: You’ve received a Gold Loser Box!
I groaned and waved the achievement out of my view.
Fucking hell.
Had I really just—
Mordecai pulled his hand free. I realized belatedly that it wasn't dark in his room, a faint golden glow from somewhere illuminating him as he brought his hand to his face, eyes locking onto mine as he slowly licked across the skin.
Fuck. I couldn't tell if that was hot or utterly, miserably humiliating.
Definitely humiliating, I decided, as the realization of what had just happened came flooding back to me.
“It's— It's not always like that,” I tried to say before I could process how ridiculous of a sentence that was. Why did that matter? Why did I care?! It wasn't like I'd signed up to do… whatever the fuck this was. The bastard had accosted me, and now I was worried about my performance?!
(There were definitely other things that I should have been worrying about more, I realized a moment later)
Mordecai curled his fingers into my hair, tugging my face down until my lips met his. He kissed me viciously, tongue shoving into my mouth, tasting of liquor and strawberries. I could feel how sharp his canines were as one of them scraped across my lip. It was the sort of kiss that left you breathless, head light, world feeling like it was spinning around you.
Wait.
No.
I opened my eyes just in time to realize the world was spinning around me.
Across the room, my clothes remained hanging in the air, outlining the shape of a man, just for a heartbeat, before they fell to the floor with a soft thwump.
My own back hit the mattress a moment later.
Teleportation is allowed in Safe Rooms? I wondered. Then: Damn, why does he get to have such a soft blanket?
Unfortunately, the third realization — the one I had been trying really hard not to get to — followed those first two rapidly: that I was flat on my back in Mordecai's bed, naked as the day I was born, dick hanging limp between my legs like one of those weird sea cucumber things that sometimes showed up on those nature shows Bea liked to put on for Donut, and Mordecai was staring down at me like he wanted to eat me.
…Incubi didn't actually eat people, right?
I tried to remember back to the lore I knew, but all I could think about was that one video game full of women with gravity-defying busts that I'd barely gotten five minutes into before I had closed it out of secondhand embarrassment. That… probably wasn't relevant right now, unless I was somehow missing some major details about Mordecai.
“Er, well, thanks?” I tried to say. “You're hot and all, but I really don't think this is a good idea and I'm not usually all that into men anyways and, uh—” I made a vague flailing motion in the direction of my crotch— “not really gonna be participating anymore tonight anyway, so if you could just let me get back to my room and sleep, that would be, uh, great?”
My voice had grown steadily higher in pitch, ending in a pitiful squeak as Mordecai wrapped his hand around my cock again.
It wasn't comfortable. His hand was too dry, my own skin too sensitive, the callouses on his fingers catching painfully as he stroked. He didn't seem to care, even though there was no chance of me getting hard again so soon.
Something tugged in the pit of my stomach. It felt like I had landed somewhere between arousal and a kick in the nuts. Desire coursed through me, even as I lurched off the bed with a pained gasp, curling in on myself in an instinctive attempt to protect myself from the sensation.
[NEW ACHIEVEMENT] Performance Improvement Plan
Description: A succubus, incubus, or other sex-based being has found your recent performance lacking! She, he, or it has taken it into their own hands to help you meet expectations. I'd tell you to go see a doctor if it lasts longer than four hours, but you'll definitely be dead by then. Get fucked!
Reward: You've received a Silver Shield Box! Remember kids: Wrap it before you tap it!
[Admin Notice: This is a perishable item. This box and all others in your inventory will open automatically upon completion of this message]
Everything seemed to happen at once.
I only had a heartbeat to be grateful that we had gotten into the practice of opening all of our loot boxes before bed when the two new rewards appeared floating in the air above me. Whatever the fuck was about to happen now, at least I didn't have to deal with the contents of half a dozen other boxes showering down on me too.
The Silver Shield Box was the first to open. A cascade of small foil packets landed in a heap on my chest, several immediately sliding off to land on the bedspread beside me.
Almost as an afterthought, a small plastic bottle landed in the heap with a thunk.
“You’ve got to be kidding me,” I sighed, picking up one of the packets to look at it more closely. It was unlabeled, but it didn’t take a genius to recognize what it was.
[NEW ITEM] Dungeon Crawler Condom
Size: Small
I waited for further elaboration, but the AI remained silent.
Fucking bastard.
Mordecai had stopped stroking my (now-hard, I noticed with surprise) cock, staring at the heap on my chest with barely concealed disgust. “Absolutely not,” he slurred, reaching up to shove the heap off of my chest with a catlike hiss.
I quickly tugged them into my inventory before they could hit the floor. They piled into a neat stack of— forty-seven?? What the actual fuck did the AI think I was going to be getting up to tonight?
Maybe, if I made it out of this, I would turn them all into water balloons. That would serve the AI right. It definitely didn’t sound like they would fit me, or that Mordecai would let that happen even if they did.
I also definitely wasn't planning on fucking this guy anyway, I reminded myself a moment later.
Honestly, what the fuck had come over him? I couldn’t tell if he was plastered or under some sort of spell or if this was just some sort of weird incubus thing, but it sure as fuck didn’t seem like the Mordecai we knew.
“Can we talk about this?” I tried to ask Mordecai, hoping he would be lucid enough to understand.
I might as well have just saved the effort. He made no indication that he even heard me at all, eyes locked onto the second lootbox as it opened.
A golden ring hovered in the air. I stared at it, baffled. It was definitely too big to fit onto any of my fingers — a bracelet, maybe? Definitely wouldn't fit me, but I could see it working on a skinnier person. But why would my lootbox give me something I couldn't use?
I focused on it, trying to view its properties, but Mordecai sprang into motion, snatching it out of the air before my interface could activate.
“Oh, you motherfucker—”
[NEW ITEM] Ashmedai's Ring of Stamina
+5 Constitution
+3 Dexterity
-3 Charisma
Don't let anyone know you're wearing this, or you'll be laughed out of town!
[Conditional Effect] Grants vulnerability to all sex-based charm abilities. Removes Debuff: Refractory Period. 50% chance to grant +1 to a random stat per orgasm for the next 30 hours. Stackable buff, max of +5 per stat.
[Conditional Effect] Grants immunity to all sex-based charm abilities. Applies Debuff: Humiliation if an NPC becomes aware of this item.
[Subtle Item] NPCs and other players will not notice this item and its effects unless they physically see it or have a skill that allows them to detect subtle items.
[Admin Notice] Item can only be equipped, activated, or unequipped with the assistance of a secondary party. Attempts by the wearer to modify this item will have consequences.
The size of the ring made perfect sense now that it was wrapped around my cock. Mordecai had slipped it on with practiced ease, tugging my balls through the ring before I even realized what was happening. The moment he let go, it had shrunk, tightening until there was no chance it would slide off. It wasn't truly painful, but it was also impossible to ignore.
I shuddered, thinking about the warning of consequences.
If I ignored, well, a lot of things, I had to admit that it sounded like a pretty fucking good item. It wasn't like I ever really used my charisma, and those other stat bonuses really were good. But what the hell were those buffs? How could I be both vulnerable and immune to an effect?
Before I could pursue that train of thought further, it was thoroughly derailed by Mordecai wrapping his lips around my cock.
Fuck.
I couldn't remember the last time someone had done that. Bea had always said it was degrading, something about the bullshit expectations of the patriarchy or whatever. I'd never really complained — it wasn't like head was that important, and I wasn't gonna be that bastard who made his girl do something she didn't want — but for some reason, I'd always gotten the sense that that made her even more annoyed.
I wondered now whether all of those men Donut told me about had gotten the same lecture, or if it had just been me.
Mordecai: Whoever you're thinking about right now, stop it.
Mordecai: It's making you taste gross.
Carl: Dude what the FUCK
Carl: You're the one who pounced me, sorry that your unwilling lay isn't everything you dreamed about.
Carl: Why the hell weren't you answering my questions?
I hissed as teeth scraped against my cock, curling my fingers into the blanket. It wasn't enough to be truly painful, but I suddenly remembered Mordecai's sharp canines and just how delicate dicks were.
The pressure eased a moment later, and he flattened his tongue against a spot just below the head of my cock, making my toes curl.
Mordecai: I'm sorry, okay? I didn't mean it to be you.
Mordecai: I thought I was in a club, but those stupid teleportations fucked with my head and I was too hungry to think straight.
Mordecai: It's an incubus thing. Just like you have to eat every day, I do too.
Mordecai: You kept teleporting me to a safe room before I could.
I know I was probably supposed to feel bad for the guy, but all that did was piss me off.
Before I realized what I was doing, I tangled my fingers in his (really soft, holy shit) hair, shoving him down onto my cock.
I felt his throat spasm around me as he gagged, choking as I forced him to deep throat me. His moan was what sent me over the edge, vision going white as I came.
I let go in horror as the stat boost notification appeared on my interface.
Carl: Fuck I didn't mean to do that I'm sorry
Mordecai: You're fine. That's the vulnerability affecting you.
Mordecai: I needed that anyway.
Mordecai: I'll explain, but I need you to pretend like you're still affected by the charm.
Y’know, I was beginning to get real fucking sick of all of this mysteriousness and ambiguity. What was it about this dungeon that made it impossible for people to just say what they meant?
My cock softened as suddenly as if I had jumped into the Puget Sound in January.
At the same time, my head seemed to clear, a haze I hadn’t even realized was there lifting from my thoughts.
The ridiculousness of this entire situation settled on me like a weight. For fuck’s sake, Mordecai hadn’t even taken his mouth off of my cock. He was just staying there, as if he was still sucking me off.
I was about to say something when he glared up at me, and I remembered what he had said.
Carl: You wanna explain what the fuck is going on?
I felt him sigh in exasperation. At least, I thought it was in exasperation, but, honestly, it was kinda fucking hard to tell with all the other mixed signals going on. For all I knew, the bastard was into this sort of thing.
At least there was no longer that weird urge to fuck him. I hadn’t even realized it was there until it had vanished. I’d never really understood what people had meant when they said somebody was irresistible, but now, I thought I could understand why so many books revolved around people “accidentally” cheating.
It made my skin crawl. It would be so easy to do something I didn’t want to, and I wouldn’t even have to take any blame.
Hell, Mordecai would probably assume it was his fault. He probably wouldn’t even try to fight me.
I hated this place.
Mordecai: I’m sorry. I wasn’t expecting my own charm effect to hit you so strongly.
Mordecai: That item you got is really fucking good. Even if you don’t take advantage of the extra stat boosts, the base stats will help you out a lot, and the immunity to charm effects is going to be real helpful on lower floors.
Mordecai: You’re only vulnerable to charm effects when you’re turned on. I honestly wasn’t expecting it to be that bad. I’m not a very powerful incubus and you’re not attracted to men, so it shouldn’t have been that bad. They must have dialed up the effect or something.
Mordecai: Stop scowling at me and at least pretend you’re having a good time right now. There’s a certain subset of viewers that enjoy watching crawlers suffering during involuntary encounters, and you do Not want them latching onto your stream, trust me.
I realized at that moment that the view counter in the corner of my interface was rapidly ticking upwards, and probably had been this entire time.
Fuck.
Everything about this place made me sick.
You will not break me.
I adjusted the hand that was still curled in Mordecai’s hair, wrapping my fingers around the base of one of his horns. Now that the arousal was gone and there was nothing but the awkward feeling of my limp cock in Mordecai’s mouth, the motion did nothing except make me hate myself.
Why was I playing along with this? Why couldn’t I just go back to my room and get back to sleep?
Carl: Why are we doing this?
Carl: You seem fine now. Can’t you just go to some bar and find somebody else who actually wants to fuck you?
Mordecai: Trust me, I would if I could. You’re definitely not my first choice for a fuck.
Ouch.
I hadn’t expected that to sting so much.
Mordecai: Don’t take it so personally. I meant I like women, that’s all.
Carl: How the fuck are you doing that?
Mordecai: Incubi eat emotions, amongst other things. It’s fainter when you’re not turned on, but still there. Anyway, to answer your earlier question, no, I can’t just go find somebody else.
Mordecai: Species trait. Once we latch onto a prey, we need to feed properly or die. Even though I’m not really an incubus, I’m still bound by that until I change form, and unless you plan to go to the next floor in the next six hours, that’s not going to happen.
You will not break me.
I found a fresh flare of anger then, not at Mordecai, but at the sadists that had built this entire awful place. How many people had chosen incubus as a race, not realizing that caveat?
Trying to calm my temper, I took a slow breath, hoping that it looked more like I was feeling deeply horny about whatever the hell it was Mordecai was doing. I don’t know how the man hadn’t gagged by now; surely it couldn’t be comfortable to just sit there like that.
Carl: By “feed properly” I assume you mean a mutual handy isn’t going to be enough.
An awful thought came to me then as I remembered some details from video games.
Carl: This isn’t going to kill me, is it?
I felt Mordecai snort, a sharp burst of warm air around my cock that felt weirdly better than it should have.
Mordecai: Since I’m not a true incubus, no, this won’t kill you.
Mordecai: I wouldn’t recommend trying it with another one. My earlier point still stands. Stay Away from pretty women with horns.
Well, yeah, that was definitely already in my plans. Sex had never been a priority for me, and even if it had been, it was hard to find energy to get it up when I would probably die as a consequence.
I already knew the answer to my next question before I even asked it.
Carl: So, what counts as “properly”
Mordecai: Third base or nothing.
Yeah, that was what I had thought.
A long silence passed between us before I got another chat alert.
Mordecai: I’m sorry I got you tangled up in this. I swear I didn’t mean to. I had hoped we would get through this floor without you ever learning about this.
Mordecai: You can probably fuck me, if that would be easier for you to accept.
Carl: “Probably”? Is that an incubus thing? Can’t feed if you’re not having sex in the right way or something?
It was one of those bullshit rules that wouldn’t have surprised me in the slightest. Didn’t the names have something to do with who was topping or whatever, or was that just another one of those stupid internet rumours that way too many people took as fact?
Mordecai: Not an incubus thing.
My stomach turned.
Not for the first time, I wondered what Mordecai had gone through during his time in the dungeon. There was so much we didn’t know about the man.
This time, however, I knew there were some things that I didn’t want to know.
Carl: You can fuck me. Just
I opened my eyes, glancing down, but his body was mostly obscured by my thighs.
Carl: Take your time, okay? Not exactly like I make a habit of doing this shit.
Carl: And, Mordecai? Next time, you ask BEFORE you attack me. Last thing we need is for Donut to get involved.
We both winced at that thought, but I could tell that Mordecai looked like a weight had lifted from his shoulders.
Christ, he had been expecting me to say no.
He’d probably already accepted that he would die. Maybe that would have been the right thing, to some people. It wasn’t like you were supposed to accost people like this.
But how the fuck could you measure a place like this with all the rules that had been in our lives before? And, as much as I hated the idea of any of this, I wasn’t willing to just sit by and watch the closest thing we had to a friend here die.
Mordecai: You’ll probably get hit by the charm effect again when I let you get hard. I can’t control it, but it should make it easier to be fucked. Incubi feed better when their prey enjoys it, so they kinda make a point of making that happen. Species trait.
I really hated the phrasing on literally every aspect of that message, but it wasn't like there was anything I could do about that right now.
Carl: Just get on with it.
A wave of dizziness hit me as the blood rushed out of my head, flooding directly into my cock. My hips bucked up of their own accord, shoving deep into Mordecai’s mouth. He didn’t choke this time, apparently expecting it now.
Another stat boost notification appeared as Mordecai pulled away, licking his lips like the cat that had gotten into the cream.
“Fuck,” I groaned, fingers curling into the sheets as I tried to catch my breath.
God, whoever was watching this (and I tried so hard to ignore how large the number on my screen was) was going to think I was some sort of loser. Then again, they probably thought Mordecai had been blowing me this entire time, but that didn’t do a lot to help out my ego.
He looked almost sheepish as he leaned across me, picking up the small bottle that I had almost forgotten.
Mordecai: That’s… also something I can do.
Mordecai: Might as well try to get the stat boosts while you can.
I let my head thump back against the bedspread. This was already more than I usually got off in a month, and my balls fucking ached, but I suspected that wasn’t going to do shit to stop Mordecai. He was right about the stat boosts, anyways, and, okay, fine, I was kinda curious about just how far that “no refractory period” buff would go.
Not that I’d ever tell the bastard that.
Carl: You know you can talk out loud, right. Your mouth isn’t full anymore, and I know you’re not drunk now.
Mordecai: It’s better the audience thinks I am. Looks better if they think you’re being attacked by a senseless beast than if they think we agreed to this.
Mordecai: Feel free to protest a bit more.
I frowned.
Carl: I thought you said we didn’t want the viewers who are into that.
Mordecai stared at the bottle for a long, intent moment — definitely way longer than any reasonable person needed to stare at lube for; the purpose was pretty self-explanatory, after all — before he finally replied.
Mordecai: I specified suffering. They won’t be interested if you look like you’re enjoying yourself.
Something about how he phrased that felt off.
I groaned.
Carl: Fucking hell, you’re into that, aren’t you?
The silence was a better answer than anything else.
I made a mental note that, tomorrow, we were going to have a discussion about boundaries and not dumping our surprise kinks on somebody when you were in a fuck or die situation and jesus christ dude where did you learn sex etiquette.
“That’s it,” I snapped, rolling my weight to one side, “I’m done. What the fuck, dude, I told you already, I’m not going to fuck you.” I kept my movements slow, telegraphing them in a way that felt painfully obvious to me.
Honestly, I probably could have moved at a normal pace. Mordecai sprang into motion like a cat snatching a bird from the sky, one hand latching onto my shoulder and—
Fuck, I was definitely not going to get used to how strong he was, I thought as my back slammed back down onto the bed, knocking the breath out of me.
Mordecai loomed over me, wings flared wide over us.
If we hadn’t just had a whole conversation about this, I would have thought the guy had lost it.
Actually, no.
I definitely still kinda thought that.
A shiver of fear laced down my spine as he stared down at me, lips slightly parted, shoulders heaving with breath. His pupils were blown so wide his eyes looked almost solid black.
God, he really was into this.
Something settled over me then, a heavier version of the initial haze. The world went syrupy at its edges, my limbs suddenly feeling like they weighed a thousand pounds.
“Whoa,” I mumbled, sounds slurring together, tongue clumsy in my mouth. “Whatthe—”
Mordecai tugged my arms up until they were over my head. He pinned my wrists down, spanning them with one hand, grip like iron. All I could do was let it happen, muscles feeling like they were made of honey.
“Mor— Mordecai?” The word barely sounded like his name.
With his free hand, he shoved one of my legs up, hooking my knee over his shoulder so that his torso held it up. The stretch made my hips ache.
Mordecai: Just relax, you’re fine.
I snorted, not able to stop myself before the sound escaped.
I wanted to write some snarky response in return to him, but I couldn’t seem to figure out how to open my chat. Huh. It was like I was drunk, or high.
Really, really fucking high.
“Stop, ‘m not gay,” I mumbled. Mostly because it was kinda funny to see how the breath caught in his throat every time I complained — I hadn't realized the guy was so into people arguing with him — but partially because it helped distracted from the really fucking weird feeling of his fingers pressing into my ass.
He'd gone for two right off the bat, which felt like it shouldn't have worked, but all it felt was a little weird. Kinda good, too, which came as a surprise, because hadn't he just said he was mostly into women?
Then again. “Women ‘ave asses too,” I mumbled, shockingly confident for how utterly nonsensical the statement had to sound.
Mordecai: Okaaay…. I'm dialing down the charm a bit.
Just enough of the haze lifted for me to realize how stupid I must have sounded.
I groaned. “Fucking hell, Mordecai.” Didn't even have to fake that complaint.
He twisted his fingers, hitting something that made me gasp and reconsider my prior stance on homosexuality. I was definitely beginning to see some of the merits, although I had no idea how much of that came from Mordecai's current species.
Mordecai: I'm going to need you to trust me.
Carl: That's exactly what somebody would say right before they do something absolutely idiotic.
Mordecai: Consider it payback for all the times you've made me worry.
Okay, yeah, he had a point there.
Still, that wasn't a whole lot of comfort when my existing experience with that phrase usually came moments before doing something that should have blown me up. It definitely did nothing to reassure me when he pulled his fingers out of me and wrapped his hand around his — let me remind you, fucking huge — cock.
“Mordecai,” I began, unable to hide the edge of panic that crept into my voice. His other hand still held my wrists firmly as he picked up the small bottle of lube, dumping some (an amount that felt like not nearly enough) sloppily onto his cock. “We should talk about this. That's— That's not gonna work.”
He groaned as I squirmed, trying to convince my sluggish limbs to cooperate. I couldn't even manage to kick my heel against his back. All I could do was watch as the bastard slowly stroked himself, obviously enjoying my attempts to flee.
Be rational, I tried to convince myself. He told you he wouldn't hurt you. You should trust that he knows what he's doing. He's definitely fucked more men than you. Maybe there's just something you don't know.
He leaned forward, forcing me to bend almost in half, my own thigh pressed against my chest. I bent the knee of my free leg, trying to ease some of the strain in my hips. I'd never been a particularly flexible guy, and this was pushing me to the edge of my limits.
I could feel the head of his cock pressing against my ass. It felt impossibly huge. This was never going to work.
I squeezed my eyes shut, bracing for the pain I knew was inevitable.
God, why had I agreed to this?
He pushed in with a long, slow stroke, splitting me open on his cock and—
I opened my eyes with a baffled moan, fingers scrabbling for some sort of grip where they were still pinned above my head. It felt weird and impossible and huge and the shape of his cock made my stomach cramp, but there was none of the searing pain I had expected.
It shouldn't have been possible, I thought as I felt him slide in to the hilt, taking my breath away, but, then again, nothing in this dungeon should have been possible.
What was a magical cock compared to literally anything else we had seen so far?
Mordecai: Told you to trust me.
Mordecai: Fuck, you're tight.
Mordecai: Didn't mean to send that.
Mordecai: Can I make you come?
“Haven't you been doing that?” I mumbled, before I remembered we were supposed to be typing.
Mordecai: Not magically.
Mordecai: Just normal style..
I didn't really get why the difference mattered, but, what the hell. I shrugged. Sure. I was already here. Might as well get off.
Carl: Be my guest, I guess. Just don’t be mad if you can’t. Dunno what my body’s gonna cooperate with.
If you had asked me before all of this, I would have said it was ridiculous to believe I could get off again at all. Bodies just didn’t work like that, especially not mine.
Either way, it seemed to be a decent enough answer for Mordecai.
I flinched as he leaned forward, not quite sure what I was expecting him to do, but all he did was press his lips to mine. He kissed with the desperation of a drowning man, like my breath was the only thing keeping him afloat.
I felt clumsy as I kissed him back, not quite sure what to do with my tongue and teeth. I was out of my depth and I knew it.
He was—
Fuck.
He was really good at this.
Okay, it wasn’t like I had a whole lot of experience to compare it to, but you didn’t need to be an expert to know when something felt fucking good. He fucked in long strokes, cock hitting spots that dragged embarrassing noises out of my mouth.
Maybe I should have just blamed it on the whole incubus thing, but I knew it wasn’t that. At some point, he had let go of my wrists and that syrupy feeling had faded from my limbs, leaving me feeling strangely clear-headed despite everything.
He pulled away from my lips, moving back to the spot on my neck that he had been attacking earlier.
It probably should have made me nervous to have sharp teeth so close to my throat — not to mention, I definitely was going to have the most godawful mark there tomorrow morning — but it was hard to worry about any of that. My hips bucked up as he worried at the skin, lightning shooting down my spine.
I moved one hand, curling my fingers around one of his horns, noting the way his thrusts stuttered with satisfaction. I’d thought that I had felt his breath catch when I had touched his horns earlier, and it seemed my hypothesis was correct. I had no idea what I would be doing with that knowledge later, but it seemed like it was something that would be good to have.
Pleasure pooled in my stomach, slow and sweet, and suddenly I understood why he had been so insistent about wanting to get me off like this.
This was nothing like the rapid shock of pleasure that had been dragged out of me with the earlier orgasms. Maybe this was a stupid way to describe it, but it felt more tangible, building with a slow intensity that made my toes curl with impatience.
“Fuck, Mordecai,” I groaned, digging my heel against his back. I was hovering right on that edge, desperate to come, but it just wasn’t enough.
I tried to reach down to touch my cock, but before I could move far, Mordecai was batting my hand away, pinning my wrist to the bed once again.
God, I hated this guy sometimes. “What the hell, man?” I complained, trying to squirm free, but he did that thing that turned my muscles to jelly again. All I could do was lay there and take it, hovering at that awful edge.
He bit down on my neck, pain flaring red as his teeth broke through my skin, and that was enough to do it.
[NEW ACHIEVEMENT] Look Ma! No Hands!
Description: You managed to come fully untouched! Don’t be too proud of yourself; this is a feat any teenage boy encountering a stiff breeze could accomplish, but for some reason, your partner insisted on making it happen. You should probably question their taste.
Reward: You got to come! You should count yourself lucky; you definitely didn’t deserve that.
I groaned. Had I somehow missed the memo that you had to have a weird kink to go into the dungeon?
“Fuck you, I’ll get off whenever I want,” I muttered in the general direction of the ceiling.
Mordecai: What?
Carl: Not you. The AI is being a bastard.
As usual, I wanted to add, but I figured that Mordecai didn’t need me to specify that.
I realized my mistake a moment later.
Mordecai hadn’t stopped fucking me, even after I had come, not that I had expected him to. It had already become clear to me that I wouldn’t get soft until he decided I was done, but whatever I had just said had sparked an entirely different look in his eyes.
Carl: Whatever you’re thinking, absolutely not.
Carl: What the hell idea did you just come up with
Mordecai: I won’t stop fucking you if you put yourself into timeout.
That does not function as a fucking answer, Mordecai.
Except for the minor detail that it did, because I knew exactly what he was going to do even before he leaned forward with a look that could only be defined as scheming.
Carl: You motherfucker.
I quickly realized my next problem. The dungeon had done a lot to toughen the soles of my feet, but I had grown dependent on my buff to dull the sensations.
Also, as it turned out, there was a very big difference between stomping dungeon mobs to death and somebody fucking licking the sole of your foot.
“Jesus fuck!” I yelped. It was only Mordecai’s iron grip pinning my knee to my chest that kept me from kicking the bastard in the face and landing myself in the naughty room. The absolute last thing I needed right now was to be frozen for a minute and get a lecture from the dungeon AI about the etiquette of kicking your sex partner in the face.
At some point, I had assumed he had sobered up, but now I realized how wrong I’d been. There was no fucking way he’d do this shit sober.
…At least, I hoped not, but I was starting to realize that there was a lot I didn’t know about Mordecai.
The entire room seemed to shudder around me as Mordecai licked up the length of my foot, dragging his tongue flat across the skin. He licked into the spaces between my toes, taking the time to explore each digit, tongue catching on the slight webbing that connected them at the base.
All I could think about was how glad I was that I had showered before this — and that I wasn’t Mordecai right now.
Yeah, this definitely wasn’t my thing, no matter how much the dungeon AI tried to push me into it.
Carl: I hate you so much right now.
Mordecai: Did you get an achievement?
Carl: Are you doing this just for the achievement? How fucking much did you have to drink??
Carl: You don’t need to do this just to get some stupid AI off.
Mordecai: Having it on your side will only benefit you.
Mordecai: Besides
I waited for him to elaborate on that, but after a long moment — which he spent way too focused on my foot — I realized nothing more was coming.
Jesus Christ.
He hadn’t forgotten that he was fucking me, either. It was slower now, smooth rolls of his hips against me.
The mixed signals were driving me insane.
The feeling of his tongue on my foot was undeniably weird, a mixture of wet and ticklish that absolutely shouldn’t have turned me on.
I wished my dick had gotten that memo.
I decided to blame all of this on the incubus thing.
Way easier than contemplating whether I could actually be into this.
Mordecai: You’re going to come from this.
Carl: You can’t just decide that, what the fuck
Except, well—
“Fuck—”
He absolutely could.
The orgasm was dragged out of me, just like the earlier ones, except this time it fucking hurt. My balls ached from it, and I knew that if it hadn’t been for the stupid ring, there was no way I would be hard right now.
I was about to ask Mordecai how much longer he was going to take, when the alert popped up on my interface.
The AI’s voice was different from usual — not its snarky “I think it’ll be funny when you die” voice, but rather an undoubtedly “my hand is shoved so deep into my pants right now” voice.
Ew.
[NEW ACHIEVEMENT] Daddy’s Little Toe Slut
Description: Somebody put their mouth on your delicious feet and licked you so good that you came. If I had my way, that’s all you’d be getting.
Reward: You’ve received a Gold Daddy’s Good Boy Box!
Carl: I fucking hate you
Carl: You’re never allowed to drink again.
Mordecai looked way too damn smug for a guy who had just spent the last several minutes getting acquainted with the wrong end of my body.
God.
There was not enough alcohol in the world to erase that from my memory.
I really, really hoped that he was still too drunk to remember any of this tomorrow morning.
I grabbed Mordecai by one of his horns and, before I could entirely process what I was doing, dragged his head up to kiss him again.
Carl: Just fuck me normal style, okay
Carl: And hurry the fuck up
Carl: My balls hurt and I want to sleep sometime today.
I saw a strange look in Mordecai’s eyes and hurriedly opened my chat again.
Carl: Whatever you’re about to suggest,
Carl: No
Carl: Absolutely not.
Carl: Just hurry up and come, bastard.
Mordecai: You’re no fun.
He slid his hand under my other leg — the one that was currently wrapped around his waist and lower back — and unhooked it, shoving it up until my thighs were both pressed to my chest.
It… wasn’t exactly a position I found myself in often. I shuddered slightly, hating how exposed it made me feel, although at least the ache in my hips eased slightly.
He had been holding back, I realized, gasping as the breath was pushed out of me. Now, he was focused on nothing but chasing his own pleasure, cock hammering into me.
I let go of his horn, curling my hands in the sheets next to my head. This must be what it was like to fuck a proper incubus; I was nothing more than a hole for him to use as he saw fit.
It was… strangely freeing. I didn’t need to do anything except lay there and take it. No need to worry if he was enjoying it; no need to worry if I was fucking him how he wanted; no need to worry if I was doing it right. Hell, I definitely didn’t need to worry if he was faking his enjoyment of this.
Maybe the foot thing hadn’t been as uncomfortable for him as I had worried…
Hmmm.
Nope.
Didn’t like that thought.
He was surprisingly quiet while he fucked. All I could hear was his huffs of breath; rarely, a quiet whimper, always quickly cut off.
His eyes were squeezed shut, teeth digging into his lower lip as if he was scared of showing how much he was enjoying himself.
It was oddly endearing to see this side of him, instead of his usually closed-off exterior. It made me want to kiss him again, just to see if I could get him to open up a bit.
Jesus Christ. If ever there was a sign that I needed some fucking sleep.
The feeling of his thrusts was transitioning from uncomfortable into painful when Mordecai finally made a sound, a deep groan as he buried himself inside of me. He collapsed on top of me, pressing his face against my shoulder to stifle it.
I was panting too, chest heaving as I tried to remember how to breathe.
I was
So.
Fucking.
Sticky.
Eugh. Disgusting.
I was a pretty athletic guy, but that had never seemed to help with the sweating. It didn’t matter how much cardio I got; my body just seemed determined to make me look like I’d just climbed out of a pool the moment I started to get any sort of exercise. It didn’t help that Mordecai ran warm, like all the fires of hell were burning beneath his skin.
“Jesus, that’s a lot of cum,” I complained, really wishing that Mordecai and I weren’t two slices of bread in the world’s worst cream pie sandwich right now.
Despite everything, my dick also apparently hadn’t gotten the memo that we were done. It pressed uncomfortably against Mordecai’s stomach, making me flinch every time he moved. I once again cursed the stupid loot box.
“Can you—” I gestured vaguely in the direction of the problem.
Mordecai took a moment to come back to himself. “Uh… yeah, sorry,” he mumbled, words slurred together. He sounded oddly self-conscious, even as he wrapped his hand around my cock, as if he was only now realizing where he was or what he had done.
There was definitely no way I would ever get used to the feeling of my cock softening so suddenly. There was no transition — one moment, I was hard, and the next, I wasn’t.
We’d have to discuss that stupid item — or, more precisely, discuss taking it off — later, but for now, I was just glad my cock was no longer the center of attention. I didn’t even want to know what my stats looked like right now, or how much it was going to suck when that buff vanished.
“Can you, like, get off of me, dude?” There was nothing more I wanted right now than a shower., and Mordecai’s dead weight on me wasn’t going to let that happen. For fuck’s sake, he hadn’t even pulled out of me yet. The feeling of his soft cock resting inside of me was odd, a sensation my brain had no idea how to process.
I nudged him again after I got no response, wondering if he was ignoring me again.
That was when I heard it: A soft snore, almost entirely muffled by the way his face was buried in my shoulder.
“You have got to be kidding me.”
I tried nudging him one more time, but it was no use. The man might as well have been a corpse.
I knew from experience that we were going to hate ourselves when we woke up. I was pretty sure that wasn’t any sort of incubus ability that protected you from crusted on cum, and if we didn’t go shower now, it was going to be a real gnarly experience tomorrow.
He snored again.
I sighed.
God, tomorrow was going to suck, but it seemed that was just gonna have to be a future-Carl sort of problem. There was no way I was going to be able to move him off of me —for a man who wasn’t nearly as big as I was, Mordecai was fucking dense. Maybe I would have been able to move him if I tried really hard, but the way we were intertwined currently made me pretty damn reluctant to try.
And, if I was going to be really honest with myself, there was something weirdly comforting about his weight on me. I tried to think about the last time I had slept with someone like this; just this quiet, skin-to-skin intimacy.
I don’t know why my chest ached so much when I realized I couldn’t remember.
How had I not noticed that Bea and I had grown so far apart? In hindsight, all of it seemed so obvious.
God. I didn’t want to think about that right now.
I curled an arm around Mordecai’s waist, worming it beneath his wings until it rested comfortably against him. This was probably a mistake. This place just loved taking advantage of any suggestion of attachment.
Then again, we’d just fucked. Couldn’t really get much more attached than that, I supposed.
The way the man squirmed against me, it seemed I was going to be cuddled whether I wanted it or not, anyway, so might as well make myself comfortable.
Goddamn it all.