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I dunno when was the first time I had ever met Yoshiki. Prob'ly Yoshiki has been with me since I became aware of my surroundin's.
In my head, Yoshiki is really a crybaby. He would just teared up if he see a tear-jerker scene, an' he always has that gloomy aura around 'im. He would also get hyped about bugs, which is really questionable to me. Same thin' with monsters an' any other creatures, but human. He might be an anti-people, or somethin' like that, I guess.
Despite that, Yoshiki is a shoulder fer me to lean on. Bein' with him, I'm no longer an Indo with that damn curse and the family duty - I'm just his homie. Yoshiki is my only joy and lifeline in this stupid cramped village.
_
Yoshiki is the sky's kindest, most radiant star, illuminates my entire world.
Take some time to look at his edgy face under those dummy bangs an' ya'll see a drop-dead gorgeous face card, no kidding.
Those tired, cat-liked eyes have a strange charm, and I can stare into 'em for enternity.
Moles scattered on his face, like constellations. He hated 'em, while I enjoy counting 'em every now an' then.
His voice like a soft breeze, deeply carressing my heart. Every time he tutors me, those cut 'n dried lectures just skip out of my head, for his gentle tone lingered on my ears.
I've fell for that kind, radiant light when we're in middle school.
_
"Hikaru, if ya really like someone, ya gonna marry 'em real quick."
"…what will happen if i don't?"
"Unuki-sama…will take 'em into the mountains."
"Why does it take them away?"
"It's lonely, so instead of takin' one of our family members… it takes the person we cherish most."
Does that mean I could marry Yoshiki? Maybe I should propose him when I grew up. I don't want 'im to be taken away.
_
I would love to say 'I love you', but sayin' it out loud is hard.
In this poky town, everything I do sets tongues waggin'. The shrine, the shiitake farm duty, which I hafta face with when I become a grown-up, an' those dudes from club who never miss a chance to tease me about someone confessin' ta me.
_
"…speakin' of, there was a big fight at Yasaburo's place not long ago. Somethin' about their next-in-line, Yuusuke-kun…"
"They were sayin' he's sick…"
"Yuusuke-kun ain't sick."
"He's a homosexual."
"That ell-gee-bee-tea thing?"
"…dunno."
I think I'm like that ell-gee-bee-tea guy, I also love a boy.
But is that wrong to love a person with the same gender?
Beats me.
_
Little by little, I also have a bad view on those people like Yuusuke-kun.
I subconsciously pushin' all that onto Yoshiki. The gossips an' pryin' eyes in this cramped place makes me feel goosebumps. I've been tryin' so hard to fit in the mold of a normal-one, actin' all outgoin' and jolly, lookin' into pretty, healthy girls. I'm plannin' just to rot away is this tiny town and settle down like everyone else.
And back then, when I teased on ya, said ya gross, I didn't even notice yer bitter face when ya heard my harsh words.
I really hate movies, they are cheesy as hell. That one ya recommend fer me, the protagonist is bein' such a sissy. And that sudden elephant from nowhere? Why'd ya tear up in a film like that?
Life doesn't go easy on fags. You should be man more.
_
I've been noticin' Saito-san lately, without even realizin' that all I was doin' was lookin' for traces of you in the way she smiles.
Bet, ya would be so glorious, outshine every girl I've met if you're a woman. I would have stick with ya all day, like cats addicted to catnip.
Yer a drug. And I'm hopelessly addicted t'ya.
But yer my bosom buddy, a boy, not someone I could love an' marry. Ya'll move out, leave me alone in this cold, stuffy place.
I never wanna stuck in this town.
I don't wanna be left behind.
If it weren't for my family and the shrine, I woulda cling t' ya to Tokyo, ya'll go to uni, I'll find a job, our future might not rollin' in money but at least it would be brighter an' we could stay far away from judgy eyes here.
_
Thinking of the future when I see ya off at the station, ya sittin' on the train to Tokyo, to a brighter life, it's just so gut wrenching.
I once told ya, I'd just camp out in yer place whenever I visit ya. That's not even a joke - I couldn't imagine of ya with a girlfriend, having kids that have moles like his papa.
I'm so coward and selfish at the same time. I want ya to head to a promising life, yet I fear that I would be blurred from yer mind in the flashy neons and the busy life of the city.
_
I've must have been out o' my mind. Why would I insisted on goin' to the beach on such a freezing day? An' ice cream, too.
An' ya still went easy on me, helped me pack stuff and went to the beach w' this moron.
Since everyone's over at the new beach, it's just ya and me here. Like a date.
With the camera from the club, ya took so many photos of me. I also like to take some pics of ya, but ya kept avoiding the lens an' showed such an awful grin, if I could call that a grin.
That day had became an unforgettable memory, still vivid in my mind 'til now.
'til death.
_
The memory played back like a slow-motion film.
Hikaru is totally wrecked. Broken bones, head like on a rollercoster, blood drips down and blurs his eyes.
He can't even lift a finger.
Bits and pieces of faces lit up in his head. His momma, his gramp who are waiting for him, noisy friends, his daddy's smile that he no longer seen for a while.
And Yoshiki.
He has been through so many summers with Yoshiki.
No one will cheer him up after he saw his parents fighting for the n'th time, like Hikaru did.
No one will share a pappico with him, give him the bigger half, complain about old Hara, like Hikaru did.
No one will admire his smile, gaze at the constellations on his face, like Hikaru did.
He still have so much thing to do, he must go back to his momma, he must apologize to Yoshiki for his rude words.
But he's too tired to do so.
He has been afraid of being abandoned in this cramped town, yet he is the one to left his friend alone in the mortal world.
A dark figure passed by.
"Is that Unuki - sama… or somethin'?"
"…seriously, at this point… anyone will do…"
He trembly raised his hand towards the entity.
"Unuki - sama."
Grant me a wish.
Written by a human in Ellipsus.