Work Text:
Vent kinda
Tw: I’m being disgusting and lazy
I can’t help but feel helpless as I watch my own body slowly deteriorate.
I can’t keep living like this.
Like I’m living in a rotting corpse i can’t do anything about.
My hair is thinning and my eyelashes are falling out more than usual. I can barely stand the urge to stain the white of my arms with the crimson of blood.
I need to stay clean. I’m almost two years clean.
I feel disgusting.
I don’t have any motivation or energy to brush my slowly rotting teeth or wash my aching rotting skin.
My nails are disintegrating, slowly falling apart and growing thin and frail.
I barely leave my room, I sleep for a few mere hours, I eat only when necessary or forced upon me.
I feel like an animal carcass, rotting in its too small cage with no one to help it, not wanting to be a burden asking for help, crying wolf when in reality, there is no wolf, only itself.