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Sasha sat in front of the door of their shared room with Soda and Cherri, they could hear the two making love like there was no tomorrow. Which Sasha was very happy about, they were more then happy that the two, who had a small misunderstanding once are showing each other their love.
Of course with three people, if two are making love, one is usually left out. Sasha was the more dominant type, they mostly took charge or commands. But they were mostly a soft top, always praising and complementing during sex. Even though they were more the soft top, Sasha hated taking charge.
They wanted to just lay under someone, blindfolded and wrists tied or just held as their lover or whoever just took them like they belonged to them since forever. Sasha loved it rough, loved being pathetic for whoever, they loved being vulnerable for anyone.
Sasha could hear their two lovers, they were roughhousing, using small insults. If Sasha weren't so optimistic or 'understanding' you could say, they would feel nothing but jealousy and envy. Sasha can't call back the last time they were fucked like they were just the most precious toy, they can't call back the last time they were fucked like they were just a toy.
Sasha wanted to be in her place, they wanted to be pinned to the wall and taken with no time for adjusting or anything. They wanted everything and so much more. But they didn't want to complain, no they shouldn't fucking complain, what kind of jealous bitch complains about their own lover being fucked by their other lover.
Goodness they were so fucking pathetic and annoying, not just annoying. They were selfish, self centered, stupid, they were a fucking idiot. If they're gonna get jealous cause their lovers are making love how they wished to be then what's the point of them being with the other two?
What's the point of them being a trio, if Sasha didn't feel apart of it. No they can't think that way, what the fuck are they thinking? Just because their not paying attention to them, doesn't mean they should go be all dramatic boohoo. There are many times were Sasha was the centre- well Sasha always tries to dilute the attention on them.
Why the fuck are they thinking and whining about wanting attention from their lover, when they're the ones who isn't letting people pay attention to them? Goodness Sasha you're a fucking miserable pathetic horrible excuse of a partner. No one your lovers are so much more happy without you, it's your fault.
Sasha didn't even realise how long they've just been sitting there zoned out and dissociated, until they heard their lovers say good night to each other. Right it was night, they wanted to go to bed but couldn't cause their lovers were having a moment.
Sasha stood outside the door, hand hovering above the handle. What would their lovers do if they disappear? What would happen if they just didn't show up anymore. What the fuck are they thinking?! God forbid Sasha, first jealously and now thinking selfishly? What the fuck is wrong with them?!
Sasha felt tears rimming their eyes, but they held back. Quickly wiping away their tears, they slowly opened the door, peaking in. Their two lovers were cuddled in their bottom bed, they smiled at the sight. Slowly they stepped in and closed the door. They noticed the small puddle by the wall near the door. so that's why they sounded so close.
Sasha just sighed and moved across the room to grab a rag, cleaning it off. They threw the rag into their laundry basket. Sasha looked back at their lovers, exhaling softly before looking away. Why are they so fucking jealous? What is this stupid envy their feeling? Why are they feeling this? These are their lovers! Their partners!
Yet it feels like, Sasha is just there to bring the two closer while pushing themself away. Sasha stared at the two, fists clenching and unclenching. They quickly stalked off up the stairs to the top bed, it was very fitted as it was very rarely used. Sasha crawled under the covers, trying so hard to hide back their pathetic cries.
Now their crying, real fucking mature Sasha. Are they just gonna cry until one of them wakes up to comfort them hm? No- well yes.. You don't deserve their comfort Sasha. You selfish needy bitch. Sasha growled, covering their eyes as tears rolled down their face.
They quickly stumbled down the stairs and ran to the door. Until they heard that voice, her voice.. "Sash? Where are you going? C'mere baby." It was Cherri.
Sasha could only freeze where they stood, tears streaming their cheeks. They quickly shook their head, opening the door and dashing out, closing the door carefully to make sure they didn't wake up their other lover. Sasha ran to the living room, taking deep shaky breaths, breathing was hard and they started getting quicker and shorter.
Are they having a panic attack?? Are they being fucking for real? God damn it Sasha! You're a fucking mess, you're nothing without Cherri or Soda don't you understand? Without them you're just a shell, you're a good for nothing pathetic dog. You're constantly following around Cherri and Soda, trying so hard to make them happy, you're probably just making them hate you.
It wouldn't be a surprise if they found you annoying since you first met, just fucking give up. Give up now, neither of them want a stupid annoying needy whore. You want their approval and attention so fucking badly, you want to be so good and the sunshine for them yet when you are you don't do a good job.
Sasha was beyond sobbing, they sat in front of the couch clutching a pillow desperately. They pleaded quietly into the cushion, begging to themselves that Cherri or Soda came to comfort them and tell them that everything they were thinking was wrong.
But despite Cherri having seen them awake and being weird. They still didn't come to check up on them, because they don't fucking care about you Sasha. Nobody does, no one cares about you. Accept it.
They curled up, sobbing softly on the ground. If they had only just sucked it up and cuddled with Cherri and Soda they wouldn't be here crying so fucking pathetically. Tomorrow, they bet Sasha will be completely okay, pretend like absolutely nothing happened and push back everything that happened. Just for the sake of not having the two worry about them.
Sasha's eyes sealed shut, slowly letting themselves succumb to their sleep. They knew the horrible nightmares they were about to get, they can't sleep well outside of Soda or Cherri's arms. Hopefully they don't have another useless meltdown. Like the pathetic person they were.