Chapter Text
Chapter1
…
(Edinburgh Castle)
(Regulus)
Five years after abandoning Hogwarts, Regulus sat at a long table seated between the Dark Lord and Lucius Malfoy. On the other side of his Lord there was Bellatrix and Rodolphus Lestrange along with Barty Crouch Jr and Evan Rosier. The stone room was dimly lit with flickering torches. The table was facing a small platform that was built to be a stage for presentations at Death Eater meetings. At the moment the stage was being used to showcase prisoners, mostly traitors and mudbloods, then assign them to pure blood families in order to gather information involving the war.
The goal was to control and obtain secrets to bring down the Order. The Dark Lord forced the prisoners and their masters to report each month so he could see if there is anything he found useful for the occurring war. The Masters were allowed to use any methods they felt would help to collect information but if their Lord did not feel the information was worthy… Regulus had seen too much for only being twenty-one.
The Prewett twins were split up, one of them dead and the other went to the Lestrange household. The day they brought Pandora, Regulus almost flinched. He had a great appreciation for her. After getting to know the witch in school they became close friends until she decided to stay neutral in the war and Regulus made the choice to leave with his family. She did not understand his decision and it was the one time they had fought. Even after leaving her on terrible terms years ago, Regulus could not show that she mattered to him at that moment. He still remembered the whole chain of events and how Evan Rosier raised his arm until the Dark Lord motioned for him to speak.
“My Lord, my family would consider it an honor to accept this traitor as our servant. In addition to keeping her from aiding the Order against you, I know this particular individual from school and believe I can extract the information that you seek.” Evan didn’t look at Voldemort when he spoke. His eyes remained on Pandora and continued to do so while he waited for a response. Evan only turned to face him when the Dark Lord finally did address him.
“That is enough reason for me to believe this is a good match. I shall expect results each month the same as the others. You may follow her to the dungeons for the binding ritual.” Evan calmly stood and bowed but before he made his exit from his Lord he briefly met Regulus’ eye before turning for the dungeons. That had been months ago.
Most meetings felt repetitive but they seemed to be bringing in more Order members than usual. At least they had kept things civil most of the night for a change. Regulus was used to the blood by now. He was expected to prepare potions regularly but he would also leave on missions when it was necessary to fight. He wasn’t sure how many lives he had taken, it had been too many years. He felt numb to it mostly. It’s not that he was bored, he just had other things that required his focus.
“Next! Bring in the next now.” The Dark Lord commanded in his snake-like raspy voice.
Regulus tried to remain in the present. He watched a death eater bring out a prisoner with long red hair. Her hands and ankles were bound in magic repressing chains, the same as Pandora's were, the same as all of them. She was pushed down, forced to kneel before the gathered death eaters seated in front of her.
“Lily Evans, my Lord. A mudblood but very valuable. She has been in close connection to both Alastor Moody and Albus Dumbledore. She will have information, no doubt.” The death eater stated and remained behind her while awaiting instructions. Barty Crouch Jr’s eyes widened as he licked his lips.
Regulus once considered Barty a friend. He was a child, much like Regulus, who struggled with love from his parents. His father was abusive and cruel with his words. As Barty began to feel more worthless at home and more accepted by the death eaters, it was not a difficult choice for him to take the mark. Barty quickly slipped into the madness and lost himself completely. Now he was unpredictable and unhinged. Extremely dangerous.
“My Lord” Barty screeched, practically a whine as if he couldn’t control his excitement. “Give her to me my lord.” He was leaning over the table as if he wanted to smell her fear, or taste it.
“Disgusting. How is one supposed to sleep knowing that it is locked in their home? Filthy.” Bellatrix hissed, spit leaving her lips.
“My Lord, it will be dead before the month is up if given to Crouch."Severus Snape spoke up from a dark corner at the end of the table. "He has a history of being unable to play nice with his toys.”
“Crouch I need your word that you will keep her mind alive long enough to gain all that we need. This can not be compromised.” The Dark Lord stated.
“Oh yes my Lord, she will always belong to you first, always. Please let me do as I will with her for you?” Barty rubbed his hands together.
“Very well” Came the dry voice again. “You have one month, you may proceed to the dungeons for Binding.”
The death eater pulled Lily up by her dirty shirt and jabbed her in the back with his wand so that she would walk off the platform. They disappeared down the stairs off to the side of the stage and Barty followed all too enthusiastically.
Regulus closed his eyes and relaxed his face so that it wouldn't scrunch in discomfort, not here. Evans won’t stand a chance now. The meeting should be close to its conclusion. Regulus would be able to let down his mental walls and relax when it was over but for now, they mustn't see any weakness. Regulus was stone, he was piercing and people feared his skill as a wizard.
Another follower spoke. “One more tonight, My Lord. And, of course, we saved the best for last.”
Regulus, eyes still firmly closed, could hear jeering as they brought the next prisoner onto the platform. He could feel a migraine coming on. He could hear the chains and smell the blood on this one. He almost made it through a meeting without more blood than usual. It must have been a brutal capture. One more and then Regulus could go home. He focused on putting up his mental walls and settling his masked expression back into place but his eyes snapped wide open when he heard the familiar name.
“Remus Lupin!”
Regulus knew this man. How the fuck did he end up here? Regulus met him at Hogwarts when they were students. Lupin was always hanging around his older brother and Potter and… shit, Pettigrew. Peter Pettigrew was with the Dark Lord now. Did he trick Lupin and bring him here?
Remus Lupin was an awkwardly lanky boy in school. He always looked tired and was covered in scars but by fifth year everyone seemed to accept him. He was a gifted student, Regulus would know also being a high achieving pupil. Regulus was extremely observant and as stubborn as he may be, he could admit the boy was brilliant. Regulus knew the Dark Lord wasn’t foolish enough to waste a great mind like this, plus, it was now public knowledge Lupin was a werewolf. Yes, Regulus knew that Voldemort would want to turn this man into a weapon. Unfortunately he also knew Lupin was fiercely loyal and would not give in easily. For the other man's sake, Regulus hoped he would.
Regulus stared as the death eaters cursed the werewolf's name and called him a filthy half breed. There were fresh open wounds on his body that seeped blood. He had two black eyes and a swollen lip. One gash on his face was bleeding bad enough a small puddle was forming below where his head hung forward. It was humiliating to see someone Regulus admired kneeling in their own filth in front of a mocking crowd in only his pants. It made Regulus feel uneasy.
“What an interesting turn of events this is. Tell me, what value is a baby werewolf to us? Can we not pull what we need from his mind and be rid of him?” Rodolphus asked.
“Ah, you see, a werewolf is immune to legitimacy. They do not require any tricks to keep one out of their mind which makes them perfect for keeping secrets. No, to retrieve any details from this one we will need to use other methods. Lucius, I assign him to you.” The Dark Lord finished addressing the room and excused himself from the meeting but as Malfoy stood and walked behind everyone at the table, Voldemort reached out to tug him down and whispered in his ear so that not even Regulus could hear. Lucius stood and straightened his jacket then gave a jerky nod before heading to the stairs that led to the dungeons but he would not be bound in blood due to Lupin's lycanthropy.
They made Remus Lupin crawl to the stairs.
As the death eaters stood to conclude the meeting, Regulus noticed one of them shoved Malfoy down the steps and turned their wand on the other who was kicking Lupin from behind. The rebel death eater threw up a 'Pretago so quickly around himself and the werewolf then followed it with a stunning spell. He then punched the death eater holding Lupin’s chains square in the chest. The death eater flew back and Lupin was covered with another magic shield once again. The rogue death eater proceeded to spin with his wand outstretched so gracefully as if it were a dance instead of a duel and when Regulus put the motion with the voice that followed together, he knew exactly what was happening.
“Shit.” He whispered to himself, still seated at the table.
“Do it now!” The mystery death eater shouted and then the spot where he Lupin had been on his hands and knees was filled with thick smoke. Regulus looked around the room to find exactly what he suspected. His brother, Sirius Black and James Potter had come to rescue their friend. Only not all three of them made it out.
Regulus was in a bit of a shock not having seen his brother in so many years but as his eyes trailed back to James Potter being ripped from his invisibility cloak, he watched Bellatrix lick up his throat with her tongue before kicking the backs of his knees in. For the first time in five years Regulus felt fear but he couldn't let it show yet, not here, so he remained as cold as ice, as still as marble.
“Black!” Regulus snapped his gaze to the Dark Lord immediately. “You will take him and await further instruction. Do not fail me. This one will be crucial to our triumph. Go now!” Bellatrix gave James a hard backhand to the face and smiled. James must have bitten his lip from the blow because there was a blood that wasn’t there before. And with the instruction from his Lord, Regulus replaced Bellatrix on James Potter’s arm and apparated away.
…
(Somewhere in the Scottish Highlands)
(Sirius)
With a crack of apparition, Sirius appeared in a field barely able to hold Remus on his feet. Sirius felt the panic in his chest. Shit, James wasn’t there. Did he get out? Sirius couldn’t worry about that at the moment. Remus’ head rolled to the side and his body went slack which caused Sirius to fumble and fall to the ground but he still managed to cushion Remus’ fall.
“Fuck! Moony, please. Fuck, stay with me please, open your eyes.” Sirius’ vision began to go blurry and he blinked the tears out over and over as they fell on Remus’ face. The werewolf’s mouth hung slightly open and Sirius could barely feel his breath or pulse. Sirius began to panic more. He held his dear friend close to his heart and sobbed into his neck but only for a brief moment. He pulled himself together and cast a levitation spell to lift the limp body and it trailed behind Sirius as he began to walk.
It was a bit of a hike but as soon as he felt the wards recognize him and Remus, there was a slight wave of comfort. Once they were beyond the wards, a small cottage came into view. The order had set up safe houses in many remote locations. They would be safe here and James would be able to find them as planned.
Inside the cottage Sirius lay a sheet over the dining room table and levitated Remus’ body onto it. Then he got to work mending his friend's wounds.
Healing Remus brought back memories from their years at Hogwarts. Sirius had spent hours reading books on healing and learning to master potions that could help Remus after his transformations from the full moon. Sirius went as far as to shadow Madam Pomfrey, the school healer, and learn everything she did to care for the werewolf on those mornings after. It was important to Sirius because he knew Remus had no one to help him in such a way and Sirius cared more than he let on.
The first ride on the Hogwarts express was both intimidating and the best day of Sirius Black’s life. His parents, Walburga and Orion Black, had told him where to sit on the train and who to look for before being sorted into Slytherin house but Sirius never had a desire to follow the Black legacy. The Noble and Most Ancient House of Black had been drilled into the minds of everyone to be respected but Sirius recognized from an early age the difference between respect and cruelty. No, Sirius Black stepped onto the Hogwarts express at eleven years old and glanced into filled cars until he came to one that seated a dark skinned boy with uncontrollable black hair and crooked glasses, a pudgy short blonde and someone… sleeping? The Marauders were created the moment the four of them were sorted into Gryffindor house, even before they knew it themselves.
Sirius smiled at the memory while he continued to heal Remus’ open wounds and clean blood from his skin. He cast a diagnostic spell to check for broken bones. “Ribs should be fine by morning.” He frowned and mumbled to himself as he carried on. When he was finished he used his wand to move Remus from the table to the small bedroom closest to the kitchen and front door. It really was a tiny cottage but it did have two bedrooms. Remus lay unconscious while Sirius changed him out of his dirty pants and into new ones. He had seen his friend naked and vulnerable many times after transformations and they had a special trust that assured Sirius that his friend would not mind what he was doing. Sirius then covered his friend with a blanket and placed a firm, meaningful kiss to his forehead. He brushed a strand of hair from Remus’ eyes and ran the back of a knuckle down his cheek before leaving to clean the mess in the kitchen.
When the area was pristine again, Sirius moved to the living room and lounged in a chair near the fire and sat facing the front door, wand in hand hoping to see only James walk through but ready for anyone else. Sirius’ eyes grew heavy and drifted shut as he fell asleep.
He couldn't have been asleep for more than two or three hours when a scream startled him awake. He knew the scream was Remus. It was different from the painful howled cries his friend would make after the full moon, this was a terrified Remus. Sirius leapt to his feet and burst into the room where his friend had been sleeping.
“Moony!” Sirius shouted in an equally scared voice. When he saw Remus thrashing and sobbing in the bed Sirius softened and tried again, reaching out his hands to gently lay on either side of the man's face. “Moony.” It was barely a whisper. Sirius connected their foreheads and shut his eyes. “Moony breath with me, I’m here with you, you are safe.” He used the same technique from when Regulus would have panic attacks as a child. Sirius moved Remus’ hand over his chest to feel his heartbeat and kept his own hand loosely on top of it. Sirius continued to breath deeply so Remus could feel him. He kept their faces touching so his friend would feel grounded then Sirius’ eyes filled with tears again, hating to see Remus in pain over and over. “Why won’t the world be kind to you?” He whispered.
“Padfoot?” It came out as a cracked croak and Sirius let out a broken sob as he reached around Remus’ shoulders, avoiding his broken ribs as much as he could. “I’m alright, hey it’s okay Pads. Sirius? What happened, look at me?” Sirius sat back wiping his face with the back of his hand. He kept his eyes down and shook his head slowly before he spoke.
“You had been gone for so long. James and I went to speak with Dumbledore because there were rumors that you were the traitor everyone had been searching for. I asked Dumbledore straight forward where you were because I knew you would never betray us. He told us that you decided to leave and that was all he knew. James and I didn’t accept that answer and when we left his office we decided to search for you. We looked for months, Moony. I… I didn’t think you were a traitor but then I started to question why you would leave without saying anything.” Sirius had his eyes so tightly closed and Remus must have used all of his strength to run a hand down his arm urging him to continue. “I started to replay moments in my head. Conversations we had so that I could find clues to where you might be but I went back too far. I went back to all the moments I failed you and I started to believe that maybe I did it enough times that you needed to be rid of me. Please tell me Moony, Remus, I need to know if it was me or if you really did betray the Order. I need you to tell me something that has happened, I know you’re hurt and it’s so much to ask but please it’s killing me.” Sirius knew his eyes were red when he finally looked up. His best friend looked at him with so much heartache and nodded slowly. His voice was so coarse when he spoke again and he stroked Sirius’ face until it looked like he couldn’t hold up his arm any longer.
“Oh Sirius, I’m so sorry this has happened. I swore to Dumbledore that I wouldn’t tell anyone the mission they needed me for. I wanted to for so long. After the first month I realized I needed to tell you, Peter and James even though I wasn’t supposed to but at that point so much had happened I was unable to. Sirius, I will tell you the truth. I need to sleep for now but tomorrow I will tell you every detail you wish to know. For tonight I need you to listen to this. I am not a traitor nor will I ever be someone who could betray my friends in any way. I left on Dumbledore's orders, not because of you. I need you in my life, Pads. You make everything better, always. Look at me.” Sirius was crying when he tried to meet Remus' eyes, holding both of his friend’s hands tightly in his own. “I need you to truly understand that this had nothing to do with you. Is that good enough for now?” Sirius could see Remus’ eyes growing heavy as he spoke and nodded.
“What do you need, Moony? Can I get you anything at all?”
“Will you stay with me?” It came out as a tiny whimper and Sirius knew he was beginning to cry.
“This is exactly where I want to be. Will it hurt if I hold you?”
“I don’t think I care.” Remus said as the tears fell and Sirius laid on his back, bringing Remus to lay his head on his chest. Sirius wrapped his arms around him and kissed the top of his head over and over while they cried in each other's embrace until they fell asleep.