Chapter Text
The first thing he knew was sand. Stuck to his face. In his shoes. Crunchy between his teeth. Then, water. His clothes were still heavy with it. The sun beat down, making his skin tight and dry and hot.
Next, he was aware of being alone. That didn't seem right. Stede sat up and looked around the beach.
Ed was lying half in the waves at the edge of the sea. Too still, too pale. Panicking, Stede crawled over to lift him out of the water. Scarlet seawater ran out of his hair. Stede moved aside the silvery strands clinging to Ed's face. His eyes were closed. Stede felt cold inside. He brought their faces closer together and felt the air move. He was still breathing.
Relieved, Stede sat back in the sand for a moment with Ed cradled in his lap.
When Stede could breathe again, he dragged Ed up the beach where it was a bit drier. He looked awful, like a half-drowned baby cat. But in that moment Stede was certain he was the most beautiful person in the world. Exhausted, he collapsed back into the sand and curled up next to Ed. He watched him breathe for a while, hoping desperately that he'd open his eyes.
he dreamed of a storm. wood cracking, rain and salt. blood. water. black.
Then he was awake again, and Ed was looking at him, big brown eyes dark in the bright surroundings. "Ed? Oh, thank god, Edward. I thought... " He brought his hand up to Ed's hairline, where dark blood was drying. Ed flinched away and inhaled sharply. Otherwise, there was no reaction. "Ed? Here, it's ok. Let me see." He turned Ed's face gently and looked at the injury. Once he cleared the blood away, the cut was only about an inch long, just above his left ear. Ed lay still for it, but bit his lip and shifted his eyes nervously.
"Ooh, not too bad. Must have happened when you went overboard." Stede said as a memory of splintering wood and snapping ropes in a storm surfaced.
Ed turned his head to look at Stede. Too fast, apparently, because he went a funny color and threw up in the sand. Stede rubbed his back and held him up until it stopped. He was mostly limp, heavy in Stede's arms. Slowly, he lowered him back to the ground. Ed lay still for a few minutes with his eyes closed. He was shivering.
"You all right?" Stede asked gently. Ed looked very ill and he wasn't sure how to help. He tried to remember what Ed had done for him, all that time ago, when Stede had been recovering from a stab wound. Stede put a hand on his and shook it a little to get his attention. His eyes opened a tiny sliver and he moaned pitifully.
"What is it?"
Ed just whimpered again. It made Stede's guts twist up painfully. "I can't help if you don't tell me what's wrong, sweetheart?" he said, rubbing Ed's arm in a way that seemed like it would be comforting.
Ed's hand moved fitfully toward his own face, and Stede realized, "Oh. The sun must be hurting your eyes? Is that it?" Ed's hand fell back to his side, which Stede took as confirmation.
"All right, you wait here, darling. I'll only be a moment," he said and ran to the small, sad copse of trees in the middle of the tiny island. He stripped off the biggest leaves he could find, grabbed some sticks that seemed sturdy enough and ran back to where Ed was, quick as he could.
Ed lay there, sand all in his hair, breathing quickly. His eyes were closed. When Stede touched his face, he pressed his lips together and moaned again, flexing his wrists and stretching his back in a way that seemed wrong. It terrified Stede to his core. He couldn't understand why, but the movement put him in mind of dying animals and dangerous fevers. Nothing he wanted to associate with his Edward.
"Honey, could you look at me, please?" He begged in the most pleasant tone he could manage. He was trying, at the same time, to put together some kind of structure to shield Ed from the sun. God. What a mess. "Look at me!" He fumbled with the stupid sticks and leaves until he'd managed to produce a meager bit of shade. It only really covered Ed's face. "Open your eyes," he said, scrambling back to kneel at Ed's side. He didn't move, but he did look a bit more peaceful now.
Stede found himself wishing that Ed had been stuck here with Roach or anyone but Stede. Buttons and Roach were as likely to eat him as to help him, but Stede still felt he was the least qualified person available. Even Jim would be a better option than him. At least they could probably hunt. Unfortunately, he was all Ed had at the moment, so he would have to do.
He went back to the trees and found some vines he could maybe use to tie the sticks together and some coconuts. He brought everything he thought might be useful back to Ed and started building. It was just like building a fort as a kid, he told himself, though he had never really done that kind of thing. He started by building a small structure, just a roof, really, big enough for maybe two people to stand or lay under. Then he got too tired again and had to sleep.
When he woke again, he was horribly thirsty. He went at one of the coconuts with a rock and a seashell until he made a hole big enough to get some of the water out. He tasted it, then dragged Ed into his lap, half sitting him up and holding it to his lips, trying to get him to drink it. Ed looked up at him. His eyes were kind of unfocused and glassy, but he looked at Stede with almost adoration. So strong that Stede felt a bit self-conscious. He'd done nothing to deserve that kind of love. Not from someone so perfect. "Hey, Ed. How are you feeling?" He said softly, putting the coconut down.
"Mmm... My head?" Ed whispered.
"Yeah, you've got a bit of a gash there. You'll probably have an awful headache."
"… how?" He asked, after some hesitation. It seemed like was having a lot of trouble getting his words out.
"There was a storm. You were hurt and fell overboard."
"Where?" He whispered.
"I don't know. " Stede admitted, "but I'm sure the crew will be looking for us." Ed closed his eyes again, face drawn and sallow. Stede allowed himself to worry, then, when Ed couldn't see. What if some permanent damage had been done? That was fine, he told himself, expected in their line of work. Ed was the brains of their whole operation, but even so. They could retire, and Stede could take care of him. Here, alone, he had no idea what to do or how to help him. After a moment, Ed opened his eyes and Stede banished those thoughts.
"How are you feeling? Do you think you could drink some of this?" Stede offered him the coconut.
Ed looked at it. He took it from Stede and fumbled at his belt for his knife. He held the coconut still and started to cut around the top. It seemed much more effective than what stede had been doing. Now that he thought about it, he had seen it done before. Ed found the edge and started to pry at it, but the knife slipped and he dropped it twice. Afraid that he might hurt himself, Stede took it gently and copied what Ed had been doing.
"Good," Ed said softly, and covered his eyes. Stede finished it quickly enough.
"Here you are, sir, a delicious coconut water," he said, a weak attempt to get Ed into one of their little games to cheer him up. He was sitting too still and it was freaking Stede out.
He just took it, looking very seriously at Stede, like he was giving him something precious, and drank some of it. Then he carefully handed it back so Stede could have the rest.
Stede wanted to insist, but it was so sweet he had to accept it. When he looked back up, something was clearly wrong. "Ed, how are you feeling?" Stede asked, putting the coconut down. Ed was looking a bit grey, and when Stede touched his head, his skin felt clammy. He really hoped he wasn't about to throw up again. But he just collapsed slowly back into the sand, breathing heavily. Stede fretted. "Edward? Please answer me," he said, "can you?
Ed shook his head, just slightly, which was a relief. At least he understood what was going on. His lips went white from just that small movement of his head, so Stede said, "ok… Just lie… lie still for me now, Ed. I'll take care of you." He felt a little bad, making that promise when he would definitely mess it up. When he saw that the panic in Ed's eyes seemed to ease at his words, he couldn't bring himself to regret it.
He wished he remembered more of how Ed had cared for him when he'd been stabbed. He gently touched Ed's hair the way he knew he liked, avoiding the injury. He ran his fingers over Ed's scalp until his blinking got slower and he fell asleep. It seemed more like normal sleep this time, not unconsciousness.
"Ok, you just rest," Stede said unnecessarily. He knew he'd need to make a fire but he couldn't make himself leave Ed alone. He took the time to clean the wound more thoroughly with a bit of saltwater. Really should have done that earlier. Ed winced and his eyelashes fluttered, but he didn't wake up. After a while, Stede reluctantly got up to find something they could burn.
When night fell, he was sweaty and tired. There was now a reasonably large pile of driftwood near their little shelter. He dug Ed's long match lighter out of his jacket and set about trying to get the wood to light. The bit of rope was too damp for the spark to catch, and he didn't know how to build a fire outdoors.
Eventually, Stede gave up and crawled under his terrible leaf canopy with Ed and fell asleep, exhausted.