Chapter Text
Kenny rubbed his face, the cool autumn night wind bitter against his skin. A horribly failed date, a sudden, cold rain, and a generally long day had made today's patrol...rough to say the least. He knelt, bracing against the end of the roof, with his cloak draped over his hands in an attempt to keep them warm. He was quickly growing tired, and was already considering an early night.
Informatrice suddenly spoke,
“Uh, Mysterion?” her voice was tired as well, but worry seeped into her tone, which wasn't a good sign.
“What's wrong ‘trice?” Kenny growled into his com, standing up and brushing off his knees,
“You know that new book display in the public library?”
“The big fancy one about occult books?” Kenny asked, beginning to walk toward the library.
“Yeah, I'm looking at the library right now,” she winced, “and I'm seeing some of our new freaky-faced friends.”
Kenny’s stomach sank, “are they inside yet?” “No they’re just..standing there.” She said, obviously confused,
“Menacingly,” Kenny growled, picking up his pace, "I'm on it,"
“SpongeBob, really?” Kenny didn't respond, leaving the pair quiet for a moment before Informatrice suddenly spoke,
“So I learned something, potentially really interesting today.”
“What did you learn?” he asked, taking a deep breath as he slid over an air conditioning unit.
"So I was at work, talking to one of the usuals, and I offhandedly mentioned you,” Informatrice giggled, “apparently, while you're the resident cryptid on campus, you're apparently an unknown outside of that, save for criminal circles, I guess.”
Kenny stooped in place for a moment, before walking again, “doesn't the Mnsas sell postcards of me?”
“it does!” Informatrice giggled, “I'm surprised you know that.”
“Ya'know, I have a life outside of kicking ass," Kenny half laughed, "and being a cryptid, apparently,”
Informatrice laughed, and Kenny smiled before he growled under his breath. The library stood tall, its domed roof and tall spires cutting the skyline with its gothic styling. Kenny knelt down on the roof across the street, There were about 6 of them, all standing around a side ally and staring at the library entrance,
"found them," he growled,
"what's the plan?"
Kenny hummed under his breath as a presence slowly approached, drawing over his shoulder. He slowly opened his staff, before standing and whirling around,
“AWAH!” Professor Chaos cried out, leaning away and blocking his face with his arms as Kenny swung at him. He froze, the end of his staff a few inches from Chaos’s visor,
“Ah, Chaos,” Kenny growled under his breath, half relieved, half annoyed, but not pulling away,
“Mysterion Dear!” Chaos loudly cheered as he gave a wild smile, pushing the staff away from his face,
Kenny flinched, before putting his hand over Chaos's exposed mouth and loudly Shushing him.
“Whatcha lookin' at?” he asked through Kenny's hand, voice muffled.
Kenny sighed, before removing his hand and kneeling down again, waving Chaos closer to the edge, “remember our friends from a few weeks ago?”
“That was last week and yes I do,” Chaos nodded, “that was the most of you I've ever seen.”
"and will ever see," Kenny rolled his eyes, before gesturing at the cult members, “Seems there’s something in the new display they want.”
“Oh.” Chaos hummed, looking over the edge before grinning maniacally,
“What are you-?” Kenny asked before Chaos poked him in the cheek,
“Bet I can find whatever it is before you do!” Chaos laughed loudly, before jumping off the roof.
Kenny stood there, watching Chaos run into the library, right through the front door. Moments later, the cult members followed, slipping inside the door in a tight group.
“'Trice did that just happen?” “
Did what just happen?" she asked, "Buddy the coms are only two-way."
“fuck,” Kenny growled, before quickly crossing the street and scrambling up to the top of the library. He glared down through the wrought iron skylight, where he watched the cult members disperse, each in a different direction.
“Shiiit.” Kenny moaned, gently bonking his head against the glass.
"you alright?"
"Tonight just got a whole lot more complicated," he growled, before slowly sliding open the skylight and jumping in, landing on a support. Below, a few librarians scurried around, none the wiser of the chaos slowly beginning to unfold around them. Kenny crawled along the iron support beam, letting the conversations going on below wash over him before a wave of mental cold water washed over Kenny as Kyle's familiar voice rang out through the library.
He kicked himself as he remembered that it was Thursday. Thursday was Kyle’s study night, where he dragged everyone who was in similar classes to the library so they would all actually study. Kenny had been a member of the group during freshman year until he changed his major and didn't need so much anatomy knowledge. He took a breath and stole himself, before jumping down onto a shelf and sliding down its connected ladder in a single, fluid motion. He glanced back and forth, checking to make sure no one was coming, before rushing across the aisle.
“'Trice?” he whispered into his com,
“Whatcha need?”
“Where is everyone?”
“Let's see…” Informatrice clucked, “OK, it looks like all the cult dudes are spread out across the library and chaos is… talking to a librarian, very excitedly about something.”
“talking?” Kenny muttered, “Where, about what?”
“Front desk, and no clue.”
Kenny groaned to himself, "Thanks.
“Just doing my job!” Kenny huffed, before rushing off toward the front desk, where, true to Informatrice’s word, Chaos was chatting with the older librarian behind the counter about baking techniques.
Kenny stared for a second, before groaning and continuing on, trying to remember where the display was. Kenny rounded a corner just in time to need to backpedal as Kyle and Stan left a side room. He hid behind a decorative pillar as best he could, pulling his hood over his face more. Kyle led the group, complaining about some kid from his chemistry lab, (why Kyle had chemistry as a psych major, Kenny would never know), followed by Stan, Tolkien, and Bebe.
Kenny held as still as he could watching his friends begin to leave before a librarian suddenly stopped the group. Kenny swore to himself as the librarian suddenly stopped to talk to the group. Slowly, Kenny slipped around the corner, before running as hard as he could.
“Uh, hello?” someone called out, and Kenny dashed into a side room. He took a few breaths, before he glanced up, finding one Professor Chaos.
“Chaos!” Kenny growled,
“Ah, Mysterion!” Chaos gasped, shocked,
“How did you get over here without me noticing?” Kenny growled, “
I-well,-I uh.” chaos took a breath before smiling, “Come on Mysterion, I’ve got to have some tricks up my sleeve!”
Kenny growled, rolling his eyes,
“Please tell me you’ve seen any of the cult members,” Kenny growled, beginning to lose patience with the whole situation.
“Uuuh, nope!” chaos smiled, Kenny growled, grabbing his face before rushing off down the room, followed a moment later by Chaos.
Chaos was silent, following close behind.
"cat got your tongue Chaos? you're usually more...chatty." Kenny snarled as he opened the next door. the children's section stood before them, dozens upon dozens of children's books spread out around a cult member, who was actively poring over them, their tentacled mask clashing against the brightly colored book in their hands. For a moment, everyone froze, before Kenny pointed at them, and growled, "YOU!"
"eep!" the cult member gasped, before grabbing a small, leather-bound book from under the piles of books and leaping up, "don't just leave the- oh for gods sake!" Kenny growled, bounding across the room and over the mess, Chaos on his tail.
The cult member led the pair down hallways and corridors, and at some point, Kenny slid to a stop and looked around.
"where the fuck am I?" he scratched at his head, having lost both the cult member and Chaos, Kenny groaned, rubbing at his eyes. For a moment Kenny considered dropping his com and going home, either the long or short way, depending on if he met one of the cult members on his way out before he stole himself. Long days meant the temptation to stop was strong, but Kenny never really gave it a serious thought. He had been Mysterion for so long that the idea of not being him felt wrong to the core. A door suddenly started to open, and Kenny gasped, diving into a side room
___
Butters was having a shockingly good night, for having a pretty bad day beforehand. Sure he was technically supposed to be doing crime at the current moment, but the library was always a fun trip! he had gotten a new muffin recipe, one he was quite sure would be a hit with his friends, and now he was basically playing hide and seek with Mysterion and some cult members about some kind of book or something, he wasn't actually entirely sure what they were looking for.
Butters gently pushed open a door, finding a complete mess.
"oh no!" he gasped, picking up some of the books spread across the floor and placing them on one of the bots following him, "who would do such a thing, to a Children's Section no less!"
Butters inspected one of the books. "ok maybe this specific book deserves it," he sneered, holding the book as far out as he could, "frankly the worst of the Hello Kitty books."
Butters sighed, tossing the book back into the piles,
"Might as well start getting everything stacked up, at least! I'm a supervillain, not a Monster after all!" He looked around, "Aw hamburgers, I'm talking to myself again."
------
Kenny cracked the door open a moment later, finding Kyle and Stan standing together, Kyle looking determined and stan looking annoyed.
"Kyle, remind me why we're creeping around the library again?" Stan asked, glaring at Kyle,
"I saw him Stan, I know it!" Kyle glowed, "The guy's a crazy vigilante, and if he's in here, something must be going down."
" So why are we here?" Stan gestured at the pair "We're not exactly superhero material dude."
"What you don't think I could be a hero?" Kyle asked,
"I don't think we'd look good in tights." Stan glared at Kyle, and Kenny had to hold a laugh back. He had seen Kyle in tights once. Kyle made him swear never to tell anyone, but he didn't look...bad, "also, neither of us have been in a real fight since like...freshman year of high school"
"Yeah but how many times have I kicked the fatass's butt?
"less times than Wendy."
"OK FINE! but that's beside my point." Kyle shook his head, his old green hat flopping side to side a little, "I want to talk to Mysterion."
"Kyle you know that's probably a bad idea right?" stan asked, "like, Tweek is one of the only people to talk to him, ever! He's not exactly a chatty dude."
" Look, just want to ask his motivation, nothing big!"
"He's probably just a masochist way beyond Kenny's level."
"Kenny's not a masochist," Kyle rolled his eyes, "he's just an idiot with no self-control,"
"or respect."
The pair were quiet for a moment.
"This isn't as fun without Kenny," Kyle groaned, "He has better owns and one-liners"
"I wouldn't say better, more evocative maybe, but not better!" Stan smiled, "he'd probably call Mysterion a...I don't even know, like a bad knockoff of Batman with a worse smoking issue or something."
Kenny took a few steps back and smiled to himself. The knot that had begun to form in his chest was slowly beginning to unravel, and Kenny walked off into the next room, leaving Stan and Kyle to their quickly devolving discussion.
The warm light of the new room stung at Kenny's eyes, followed by the cool, dry air assaulting his mouth. Kenny coughed, and Chaos turned around, the small leather notebook the cult member had been carrying in one hand. Chaos looked shocked.
"you caught them." Kenny relaxed a little more, before snickering a bit, "Guess you won the bet Chaos."
Kenny gestured back at the handful of pedestals displaying an array of grimoires and Necronomicons, a space was missing for the small notebook, but they were otherwise untouched.
"iiiiii, suppose I did." chaos looked more than a little confused, tucking the notebook behind his back as he spoke.
Kenny glared, suddenly suspicious, "What's in the notebook?"
" Op, uh, nothing don't worry Mysterion, it's nothing really!" Chaos smiled, stepping back.
The knot in Kenny's chest tightened a little. "Chaos."
For a moment, the pair were silent, as Kenny slowly opened his staff under his cloak, while 'Chaos' leaned back.
"fuck it!" 'Chaos's' voice shifted as he grabbed one of the large Necronomicons and bolted, and Kenny leaped onto his tail.
For a moment, they ran, Kenny barely gaining, until Kenny grabbed one of his rockets and threw it, where it quickly threw 'Chaos' off balance. 'Chaos' tripped, the oversized book falling a few feet away. Kenny leaped over 'Chaos', scooping up the book, before 'Chaos' grabbed his leg.
Kenny dropped onto the book, its sharp edges digging into his ribs, 'Chaos' leaped to his feet and grabbed at the book only to be met with Kenny swinging his staff up towards 'chaos's' face, cracking against the metal guard of his visor.
"AK!" 'Chaos' Squeaked, rubbing the side of his face as Kenny lept to his feet.
'Chaos' was still as Kenny broke through the next door, only to throw what looked like a mangled spray paint can through before the door swung closed.
"wha-?" Kenny asked before the device began to hiss, "fuck!"
Kenny started to cough a bit, as the gas stung at his mouth. He pulled his sweater over his mouth as he glanced around.
The room was a dead end with no windows, and by smell and taste alone, Kenny could tell whatever this stuff was bad news for him, leaving option two, hide the book.
Kenny took a pair of steps, his legs beginning to shake, growing unstable by the moment. The weight of the tome grew with each desperate lurch before Kenny eventually managed to shove the book under one of the shelves.
He staggered back and fell on his ass in an ungraceful heap.
Kenny wheezed as his lungs began to burn. He kicked the canister away, as the thick fumes that spewed began to thicken and become visible, swirling around Kenny in a shifting pattern. A moment later, the canister rolled back, bumping against his foot. He forced himself to look up, his eyes aching as 'Chaos' appeared, laughing. It laughed as darkness began to fill Kenny's vision, obscuring the shifting of ‘Chaos’s’ skin and clothing. Kenny tried to stand again against the weight of his limbs, only to fall again, unable to push back up against the floor. He forced his eyes open to glare up at the figure who was once Chaos, now a mess of white and fuschia, as he desperately fought against the heavy weight clawing him down.
“Fuck you.” Kenny wheezed into the darkness that claimed his vision, before whispering a hushed, “Sorry trice.” Kenny felt his heart rate slow before everything went black.