Chapter Text
Bridgerton Family Circus was the Bridgerton family's pride and joy for over five generations now. His great-great-grandfather had started the circus almost a hundred years back and it had just grown, passing down from firstborn to firstborn until it had landed in Anthony’s lap rather unexpectedly at the age of 18 after the untimely death of his father.
The Circus had been Edmund Bridgerton’s whole world. He had been born in it, just as his father had before him and just as all his children after him. He had met Violet Ledger, a waitress who dreamed of being a dancer while on the road. They had fallen in love and gotten married before the tent was packed into the caravan, her suitcase joining alongside his. Then came Anthony. And soon after, Ben. And then Colin, followed closely by Daphne. Eloise, Fran and Greg eventually added to the family over the subsequent few years. All of them raised around the packed dirt floor and wooden stands, discovering their passion for the circus arts from the backstage. But by the time Hyacinth joined the family, Edmund was gone and the circus became Anthony’s whole world.
It had been his father’s life, so it became his life too.
Anthony loved it, he really did. There was nothing quite like being under the big top in the middle of the ring, all lights shining on you while the world faded to a blur, the faces blending together in the darkness of the stands. He loved shepherding his siblings as they found their unique passions and put together their numbers, butting heads to come up with new, more interesting shows. He enjoyed even the menial, mechanical, and physical tasks the show required. Loading and unloading trunks, cleaning up afterwards, selling tickets, you name it. There was no task too small or simple for him.
Anthony did not need to be the ringmaster. His mother could keep performing the role she inherited from his father for as long as she wished. No, Anthony’s true passion was the trapeze. Flying over the audience, twisting and spinning to people’s awed gasps as his brother caught him just in the nick of time. The swoop of his stomach as he fought with gravity was probably Anthony’s favourite feeling in the world.
If Anthony believed in such a thing, he’d say it might have been destiny that it had been during one of these moments that he had seen her for the first time. His eyes landed on her as he swung from the bars, hanging upside down with his legs pressed against the cold metal as he moved back and forth, waiting for Daph to make the jump.
The woman was sitting in one of the special little boxes close to the ring, reserved for guests and important people and she was the most stunning sight Anthony had ever seen. Wild locks of raven-black hair were escaping her braid, her teal jacket a striking contrast against her bronzed skin, she was breathtaking to behold. But it had been the expression on her face that had caught his eye. The glint of wonder shone more faintly than he usually saw in the audience. It was contained, quiet along with the way her lips pressed together as if trying to repress the smile she wasn’t really able to hold back. Like she was seeing something magical but was holding back in order not to reveal just how much she’d enjoyed it.
Anthony had barely caught Daphne on time.
It was only after the show that Anthony managed to get a better glimpse at her . His mother waved him towards the very same box where she was talking to a group of women.
“Agatha, you remember my eldest, Anthony?” Violet rested her hand on his still-bare arm gently, her brightest smile on her face.
“He’s significantly bigger than the last time I saw him, that’s for certain.” The oldest woman in the group huffed with a thump of her cane.
“Quite true. They grow up so fast!” His mother laughed joyously, looking up at him. “Anthony, darling, I don’t know if you recall, but this is Agatha Danbury,”
“Simon’s godmother!” That was why the name had been so familiar to him and that was why the 6’2’’ man was hiding out back, looking a bit grim. “I’m glad you could come and enjoy the show.”
“It would have been better if my godson would deign to speak to me instead of cowering away somewhere like a child.”
“I’m sure he will, Agatha.” Violet extended her hands to her friend. “I was overjoyed to know you were paying a visit. It’s been so long!”
“Life’s been keeping me from the big top for too much time.” The woman said with a dismissive wave of her hand. “But I could not pass the opportunity to bring Mary to watch such a spectacle when I heard you were back in town for a season. Violet, this is my friend Mary Sharma.”
“It’s been ages since I’ve watched something so wonderful, Mrs Bridgerton.” The second oldest woman chimed in. She was smaller and had a kind face with a gentle smile.
“Oh, it’s Violet, please! Any friend of Agatha’s is a friend of ours!”
“I was just telling the girls how lovely the entire thing was. Such different numbers!” She motioned to the others in their group. “These are my daughters, Kate and Edwina.”
Finally, Anthony’s eyes landed on her . Kate . She was taller up close, with long legs and sharp cheekbones, and even more beautiful than he had first thought her to be.
Kate was standing by the youngest girl, Edwina, who was bouncing at her feet, trying desperately to assimilate everything around her. Her eyes were shining with excitement and wonder so free and so different from the carefully contained spark he had seen in her oldest sister earlier. Edwina looked to be around Eloise’s age, small and lithe, with a type of delicate beauty that reminded Anthony of the porcelain dolls his grandmother had collected and Daphne now treasured.
“It was magical!” The younger girl jumped in with a happy clap of her hands. “I’ve never seen anything so sensational in my life!” Next to her, Anthony saw her sister roll her eyes a bit fondly at the overtly-excited young woman, unable to fight the affectionate smile from gracing her delectable lips.
“I can show you around the backstage if you want,” Anthony said graciously to Edwina. She reminded him of his younger sisters, so full of youthful enthusiasm and amazement. Anthony loved the way people reacted to the crazy energy of the circus and young Edwina was no exception. Maybe showing her around might even endear him to her older sister…
It was clearly the wrong thing for him to say. Gone were the warm grin and relaxed stance, quickly replaced by a rigid posture and narrowed suspicious eyes.
“Oh my… Really?” Differently from her sister, Edwina looked like Christmas had come early to her. Hopping up and down, it seemed she was ready to break into a happy dance, Kate’s scowl towards the oldest Bridgerton going completely unnoticed.
“Sure.” He smiled kindly at the young girl while trying to read the older one, trying to figure out what exactly had brought on such a shift in her.
“We’d absolutely love it, wouldn’t we, Didi ?” Edwina turned to her sister, who did not look as if she would love it at all , her lips pressed into a thin distasteful line.
“I’m sure Mr Bridgerton has loads of things to do, Bon.”
“Not at all. I’ll gladly give you two a tour.” He winked at Edwina, making the younger girl giggle and blush and making Kate’s frown deepen even more, her gorgeous face twisted in annoyance. For some reason, he was irritating her, the fire in her eyes as she glared at him making him strangely bold. “And it’s Anthony, please.”
“We’re not familiar enough to…”
“You’ll soon find out that there are way too many Mr Bridgertons in this crew to bother with such silly formalities.” He motioned towards the ring with a flourish of his hand. “Shall we, ladies?”
Edwina squeaked gleefully, almost skipping as she made to trail after him. Kate, on the other hand, looked like she was walking towards the gallows, not a visit to the backstage. She looked rather lovely, flushed with anger.
“Enjoy your tour, girls,” Mary called out to her daughters.
“You couldn’t have asked for a better guide. I cannot think of anyone who knows this circus as well as Anthony.” Violet smiled at her oldest son. “And Ant, if you see Simon, be a dear and tell him Agatha is waiting for him to speak to her.”
“I most definitely will.” Truly, right at that moment, few things seemed more appealing than watching his best friend stumble through an awkward explanation of how he had ended up falling in love with Anthony's little sister and joined the circus. Anthony had not been particularly thrilled at the turn of events, especially since falling in love and joining the circus had been two things Simon had spent his entire life swearing off. And all of that without a word to his circus-famous godmother, who had to find out about it from an overly excited Violet.
Well, he could think of at least one thing more appealing than that, but unfortunately, right at that moment, the eldest Sharma sister was staring at him with something resembling murderous intent in her eyes. He might have to settle on watching his friend squirm under the severe gaze of his scary godmother instead.
In the weeks that passed, Edwina and Kate Sharma quickly became regular fixtures around the circus. They showed up most nights for the performance, Kate trailing Edwina closely with a deeply annoyed scowl on her face. She had spent the entirety of the backstage tour glaring daggers at Anthony as she stood between him and her sister with her arms crossed in front of her chest sternly, finding any opportunity to throw a well-aimed barb or ten towards him. And it had been clear the issue was him alone. She had been polite and even friendly towards every single member of the crew he’d introduced them to, every person but him. It was grating and difficult to not take personally.
And yet, Anthony had seemed to take a peculiar pleasure in annoying the eldest Miss Sharma. The way her lips would purse, her eyebrows would draw together and her nose would wrinkle had a very strange reaction in him and he could scarcely control it.
Eloise had taken a liking to Edwina instantly, inviting her to join them on days with no performances or to come up earlier to hang out with them. Kate was always behind her, looking like a ridiculously-attractive and ridiculously-angry guard dog.
Anthony preened like a peacock whenever they came to watch them practice, more daring and flashy than he’d been in years. He challenged Ben, Daph and Richard to go even harder than they usually did. He flew higher and worked more complicated flips and it was worth it to glimpse at the way Kate would desperately try to pretend she was not impressed by any of it.
Her sister, on the other hand, did nothing to hold back her gleeful cheers and surprised gasps at their tricks, clapping and jumping up and down her seat.
“Would you like to give it a try, Edwina?” He couldn’t help offering. Her excitement reminded him too much of the way Hyacinth would sit and watch him with bright young eyes.
“Absolutely not .” Kate barked before her sister could even open her mouth. Her eyes were burning, directed at him with a fury that had Anthony’s heart go wild in his chest.
He couldn’t help himself, he really couldn’t.
“Awn, come Miss Sharma. We’ll just swing her back and forth. It’s perfectly safe.” He smirked at her from his perch at the bar. “You can even try a bit as well if you want.”
“Oh Didi, come on, it’ll be fun.”
“I’m not going up there with him .” Kate’s snare only made Anthony’s smirk bigger.
“Well, you don’t have to.” Her little sister said, resting a gentle hand on her arm. “But I am.”
“Eddie!”
“Brava, Miss Edwina!” Anthony cried from his spot, rousing a round of applause for the small woman who peeled off her slipper and started climbing the ladder of the centre pole with determined moves. If looks could kill, Anthony would be a dead man.
“It really is quite safe, even little Hy has done it,” Eloise told Kate. “The boys are really good at what they do. And that’s what we have the net and the ropes for.”
Kate did not reply, her eyes glued to her sister, who was climbing higher and higher. Daphne offered her hand to Edwina once she reached the platform, giving gentle instructions as she strapped her in safety gear and applied a generous amount of powder to her hand.
The young girl was shaking with barely contained excitement when Anthony stepped to the board. She barely even seemed nervous at all.
“Do I just jump?” Edwina asked the moment he started pulling on the bar and Anthony couldn’t help the smile on his lips. She reminded him way too much of Hyacinth, who’d sat watching him every day for months, asking over and over ‘Will you teach me now?’ until he finally relented.
“Left hand on the rope, right hand on the bar. Stand up straight, don’t bend forwards, hips out.” The younger girl did not hesitate to do what he said. From the corner of his eye, Anthony could see Kate watching with a half-annoyed, half-worried expression, her teeth sinking to her bottom lip. “When I say ready, you put your left hand on the bar and when I say hup, you jump. After you do it, just keep your body as straight as you can. Got it?”
“Got it. Let’s do this.” Edwina was practically vibrating with excitement. “Didi! Record this for Mama!”
They could not catch whatever it was her sister answered, but from the tone of it, it sounded either like a prayer or a curse.
“Alright.” He held onto her belt. “Body forward. Ready! Hup !”
She was out of the platform with an excited whoop. The desperate squeak that rang around the tent was not hers, but her sister’s, who had her face buried in her hands while Eloise held up the phone for recording.
“How do I get down?”
“Just let go when your body goes forwards.” Edwina laughed as she let herself drop to the net, his cousin Richard already on it to help her down.
“Can I go again?”
“Sure. We’ll show you how to swing.” She clapped in delight, rushing to the stairs.
“Didi, it’s so cool, it feels like flying. Are you sure you don’t want to try?”
“I’d rather die .”
“Suit yourself.”
They were at it for another fifteen minutes until it was time for them to start setting things up for the next performance. Anthony was the last one to flip himself off the net, following his sister.
He felt arms wrap around him as soon as his feet touched the ground.
“This was so, so amazing!” Edwina said excitedly, squeezing him hard. “Thank you, thank you, thank you !”
“I’m glad you had fun,” Anthony answered with an awkward pat on her back. She pulled away from him, turning to hug Daphne with a little squeak.
“I’ve never done anything so cool in my life!” And as quickly as she had come, she left, skipping around like an overly-excited puppy, Eloise in tow.
Anthony stayed behind as people slowly started slipping out from the tent, taking his time to remove his wrist wrapping and find his water bottle.
He cherished those rare little moments in which he managed to be alone in the ring. The empty chairs around him, the hard ground beneath his feet and the utter silence that surrounded the entire place. All of them ready to be filled with wonder and joy and laughter. All the potential that his father had seen in it and spent his entire life teaching Anthony to see as well. All the potential that made each and every performance magical .
Anthony loved that more than he could actually put into words.
When his eyes landed on Kate, standing at the edge of the ring, the first thing that came to him at the moment was that she fit quite well in there. In the middle of that potential to make something incredible.
The second was that she looked absolutely irate. Her mouth was tight and her jaw was clenched, her shoulders tense and back straight.
It shouldn’t be possible that her anger made her even more stunning, and yet…
“Stay away from my sister.” She spoke through gritted teeth and Anthony couldn’t manage to control the little snicker that came to him, moved by that strange pull that had him desperately trying to rally her up just a bit more.
“Your sister is an adult, Kate.” He grinned at her annoyed little frown. “Let her have her fun.”
“You know nothing of my sister. Leave her alone.”
“I didn’t force her up the platform. She wanted to do it.” They were almost nose to nose and for the life of him, Anthony couldn’t tell when either of them had moved.
“You think you can do whatever you want. You just go around shooting your pleasing smile around as if…”
“So you find my smile pleasing.”
“You’re insufferable !” She declared decisively. “And I can’t wait for the circus to leave so I won’t have to see your face ever again.” With a final huff, she turned around and marched out of the room, leaving Anthony standing dumbfounded, surrounded by a maddening smell of lilies and soap.
Indeed, Kate Sharma was as infuriating as she was beautiful. What a woman.
“Edwina wants to join us!” Eloise announced as she marched into the cramped wagon Anthony used as his study, followed closely by Violet. “Did you know she trained as a gymnast? And she can slackline really well!”
“Eloise…” Anthony groaned, rubbing his eyes.
“She’s quite skilled in solo acrobatics and I’m sure if she worked with Alexandra, they could have a number on the wire perfected soon.”
“El, we’re going on tour soon. I’m sure Edwina might be having fun now, but life on the road is tough. She’d have to leave her life behind.”
“There’s nothing for her here, Ant! Her whole life was back in India and here she just has a shitty part-time job as she’s trying to get a decent enough score to get into a halfway decent uni that she doesn’t even know if she wants to do.”
“She has her mother and her sister.” He reminded her.
“Actually…” Eloise’s words died on her lips, her cheeks flooding with colour as she looked guiltily towards their mother. Anthony let out an annoyed groan. Violet Bridgerton clearing her throat and squaring her shoulder meant nothing good could come from this conversation. Or at least, nothing he would consider good.
“I’ve spoken to Kate about it.” Violet faced him dead on while Eloise didn’t seem to be able to meet his eye all of a sudden. “I offered her a position as well.”
“Let me see if I got this straight.” He rubbed his forehead tiredly, trying to will away the headache that was threatening to burst. “You have decided to hire, not only one, but two people, already offered them a job and came up with a whole new wire number. All of that without even consulting me.”
“Edwina would be a lovely addition to the show, Anthony. The girl has potential. But she wouldn’t come without her sister.” Violet spoke as if she was speaking to a child and not her 28-year-old son who had been running this place for the past ten years. Damn his mother and her need to gather strays. “And Agatha swears by Kate.”
“Let me guess, you have even already figured out the rooming arrangement for this.” His mother had at least the decency to look a little ashamed, but it did not stop her from looking him dead in the eye as she answered.
“We did.”
“Pray tell, what position you offered the eldest Miss Sharma?” He leaned back on his chair with a sarcastic glare. “Is she to freeze the audience with her frosty glares? Or throw daggers, perhaps? She seems like the sort.”
“Anthony, that’s rude!” Eloise cried out in outrage but the two adults ignored her.
“I actually offered a more administrative position.” The way Violed eyed her son froze him on the spot.
“Oh God, what did you do ?”
“She has a rather extensive experience with management, you know? Agatha spoke quite highly of her.”
“ Mother… ”
“I thought it would be good for you if there was someone who could help you with the mountains of administrative work you have to go through.”
“I’ve been managing just fine on my own.” He growled through ground teeth.
“Oh, Anthony, of course, you are!” Violet’s voice became softer as she moved closer to her eldest son. “I never meant to imply you were doing anything less than wonderful.”
“ Clearly .” He rolled his eyes, the word a bit harsher than he intended.
“The circus has been running very smoothly with you, Anthony, I’m not questioning that. But, son…” His mother’s hand fell to his shoulder gently, as if reaching for a feral beast who might lash out at the slightest provocation. Honestly, Anthony felt the description wasn’t far from what he was feeling at the moment. “You’re working yourself to the ground.” He opened his mouth to protest, to tell her she was wrong, that he was doing fine, but she continued before he could get a word out. “You barely sleep, you train until you can barely stand and don’t think I don’t see the way you’re skipping meals.”
“I’m fine.” He grunted through clenched teeth, but his mother waved him away.
“You’re not indestructible Anthony, even if, I swear, sometimes you act as if you think you are.” Violet’s tone was kind and he was sure she meant well but the words seemed to shoot an arrow through his heart. Of course, he didn’t think himself indestructible. Quite the opposite, he was quite aware of his own mortality every single minute of his life since the day Edmund Bridgerton dropped dead right in front of him. But what was he to do? Let the entire circus crumble to ruin? Allow his father’s and his grandfather’s legacies to go to waste? All the last century of hard work? All the lives of the rest of the crew? No, he wouldn’t have it. “I just thought it would be nice to have someone take a few of those responsibilities from your shoulders.”
“ Right .”
“I don’t want her to replace you, Anthony.” She said, with a gentle squeeze of his shoulder. “I intend for her to assist you.”
“Don’t you think you should have consulted me before you decided to hire someone to assist me ?” He asked, the last few threads of his patience threatening to snap. “Someone, may I remind you, does not like me very much?”
“You don’t even know each other properly.” And yet she had already decided to hate him. “I'm sure you’ll be able to figure yourselves out.”
“Actually I think you two are rather alike.”
Anthony sighed in defeat. He could continue debating with his mother and sister for another hour, yet it would achieve nothing but make him more exhausted than he already was. It was clear both of them seem to have settled on the subject with the singlemindedness the Bridgertons were known for.
"I can see that you're not here to consult with me but to inform me of the decision that clearly has already been made." At least the two women in the room had the decency to look a bit ashamed as he rubbed his eyes with a deep sigh. "Just have their documents delivered to me as soon as possible so I can get the contracts drafted."
"Anthony, that's not what we're..."
"And make sure they get checked by Uncle Nick and Dorset sometime this week." He continued, ignoring his mother's words. "I'll need their written report to add to their files."
"Eloise give us a moment." It was not necessary to repeat herself, his sister was out of the door before his mother had finished speaking. "You're being hard-headed on purpose again."
"I'm not being hard-headed, Mum." He dropped his pen, letting his body fall against his chair. "I'm tired. I have quite a lot to get done if we're planning on taking off next week as scheduled. You've made your decision and it doesn't matter to you if I agree to it or not."
"That's not true."
"Isn't it though?" Anthony cocked his eyebrow at his angry mother. "If I were to tell you I don't think having the Sharmas join us is the right choice, would you back down?"
"Now, you see..."
"Case in point." He waved his hand, making his mother even more annoyed. "I've learned that it's useless to try and reason with you when you make your decisions years ago."
"I'll have you know that I know a thing or two about running this place, Anthony. I've done it for years along with your father."
It was always like this. Violet decided on something, and if she had decided it would be done, whether Anthony agreed to it or not. Lucky for him, his mother was a relatively sensible person most of the time, and it wasn't as usual for him to disagree with her opinions. But still, it would happen once or twice anyway. And more often than not, she'd get things done her way. Anthony had stopped fighting her over it a long time ago.
"Of course you do." He nodded, but it was clear he was just doing it to get her to drop the subject. "So let's save both our energies. Just have them bring their documents to me as soon as possible, will you?"
It was obviously a dismissal, and it was clear in Violet's eyes she understood and she was not pleased about it. She seemed desperate to say something back, but silence rang thick around them as mother and son stared at each other in the cramped space.
"I'll hand them the list today." She finally said and it was clear she was not happy to do so.
"Good." Anthony picked up his pen again, letting his gaze return to the spreadsheet demanding his attention in front of him. "Was there anything else?"
"No, dear." Violet was nothing but a good showwoman because she smiled gently at her son. "I'll let you get back to work."
Anthony only relaxed when the door was closed behind his mother. His body slumped against the chair, letting his head drop backwards. It did not bother him that his mother decided to pick up all the strays she saw on her way. Most of the people who joined their crew were hardworking and committed and the ones who weren't didn’t really stick around for long. He could not be sure if either of the Sharmas would be cut out to the kind of life they led. It was as gruesome and unforgiving as it was good and not everyone was made for it.
It was not the clear dismissal that had bothered him. No, it had been the way his mother had hinted he needed help . Of course, Anthony was overworked and exhausted, but it was nothing new. He was rather used to it by now.
He didn't know if Miss Sharma would be a skilled manager or not but Bridgerton Circus was his entire life. His reason to live. He lived and breathed that place. And he'd be damned if he'd let someone else ruin that.
Well, it seemed Kate Sharma’s wish to get rid of him wouldn’t come to pass anytime soon.