Chapter Text
TRACK 1
MAY
After years of sharing her mind, body and soul with the darkness inside her, constantly waiting for the eternal flame to burn through her, Nat Scatorccio has learned to live with it. She’s learned to not give into it — to not peek her head through the crack of the door and wonder if she can spot its eyes staring back at her. She’s learned not to give it the space to grow, to not feed it with the kind of fuel life likes to throw its way sometimes. She’s learned that it can’t be destroyed — not really. It will always exist inside her, it will always burn through the walls of her stomach, smoke making its way up her throat to cloud her mind. She’s learned that it’s inevitable — that some people are born with a darkness that will never go away.
But she’s also learned that the darkness doesn’t have to define her. She’s learned that she can nurture it in a way that doesn’t allow for the flames to get too big — that she can let the fire burn without taking down an entire village — and she welcomes the light that it brings.
The Yellowjackets went on to lose Nationals (but with Lottie’s masterful footwork and Tai’s relentless spirit and Jackie’s rough housing, they definitely didn’t go down without a fight) and Nat’s plan to sulk and brood on the plane ride back to New Jersey was thwarted by Lottie’s soft lips against hers and the way she tenderly slipped her hands into Nat’s, casually rubbing her thumb against the blonde’s palm.
Lottie was always really good at those kind of subtle, gentle touches — even when they weren’t dating — and Nat wasn’t sure if the brunette knew the kind of effect she had on her, or if she was just doing what felt natural in the moment. Nat supposed both could be true. Lottie was a galaxy of complexities and contradictions that Nat would never get tired of exploring.
When the Yellowjackets got back home, the rest of the semester passed by fairly quickly.
Exams and exams and more exams; Nat could barely breathe.
(She barely had the time to let it all sink in — to acknowledge that this was the end of a chapter four years in the making. It still hadn’t fully dawned on her all the things she wouldn’t do anymore: she wouldn’t walk these hallways anymore, she wouldn’t room with Toni anymore, she wouldn’t play for the Yellowjackets soccer team anymore, she wouldn’t have classes to attend anymore, she wouldn't get student discounts as Caligula's anymore...
It was all too much.)
Nat was never the type to let change scare her off. Quite the opposite, she was usually the first one ready to move onto the next chapter of her life. She only now wondered if that was only because she never particularly enjoyed any of the chapters in her shitty book of life the way she enjoyed this one. It was usually a relief to turn the page, to keep moving forward and not look back.
(Maybe it was scary this time because Nat finally had a life she didn’t want to lose.)
So she braced herself, throwing herself head first into the last week of her academic career, and the end of a chapter she was reluctant to close.
***
“When we’re all grown, we’re gonna live together.” Tai had said one day in middle school, during lunch time. Tai grabbed Nat’s skinny wrist, tugging her towards her and wrapping her arms around her neck in a hug — something both girls never did.
“Are you… hugging me?” Nat couldn’t help but ask, equally confused and amused.
At the blonde’s words, Tai cleared her throat and shoved Nat back, grunting.
“Loser.” Nat laughed. “You were hugging me!”
“Yeah. Whatever.”
Nat smiled at her best friend — her only friend, really — and reached over, grabbing her hand and just holding it in hers for a moment.
“We’re gonna host the coolest parties.” Nat said.
Tai’s eyes lit up, and she smiled widely at her friend. They weaved their futures together with their words — painting a picture of the lives they were so desperate to live, filled with red brick walls and New York fire escapes and shady dive bars and eccentric neighbours — and let their minds run free with possibility.
“We’ll move to Manhattan and live in the heart of the city. All the cool bands play shows there, you know? It’ll be awesome.”
Tai had nodded enthusiastically at that, and had told Nat that they’d finally have everything they’d ever wanted.
Tai and Nat’s words echoed throughout the universe that day; they planted a seed that would only begin to grow and sprout years later.
***
Nat recognized Tai’s all-too-familiar grunt that meant she was either a) hungry enough to commit first-degree murder, b) extremely annoyed with something that someone was saying to her, or c) had run out of patience and could not possibly spend another second waiting for whatever it was she was waiting for. The correct answer? D) all of the above.
“Misty, I’m sorry but I can barely hear you right now over the sound of my own stomach eating itself.” Nat winced at Tai’s tone; she could tell the other girl was about to snap and Misty was by far the last person that should be trying to converse with her.
And it was as if the universe answered Nat’s silent prayers, because just then, Nat spotted Van across the crowd of soon-to-be graduates, decked head to toe in the classic cap and gown they all suffered four years for. She waved at the redhead, hoping Van could see the begging in her eyes from the other side of the room.
Come here and calm your hangry girlfriend down please, before she murders Misty.
Thankfully, Van took the hint and began to make their way over — like Moses parting the red fucking sea if Moses was a genderqueer redhead in a cap and gown and the red sea was a crowd of New Jersey State University graduates.
“You know, I heard the ceremony is really long this year — like, longer than usual. Weird, right?” Nat tuned back into the very one-sided conversation happening between Misty and Tai. “It’s already been half an hour that we’re just waiting around for instructions, you know? You’d think a university would be a little more organized—”
“Hey guys!” Van’s voice cut through Misty’s (and Nat thanked the God she didn’t even really believe in for the interruption).
Van was gleaming at the sight of Tai, and Nat noticed Tai’s shoulders relax, dropping slightly at her partner’s gentle touch.
Nat’s thoughts shifted over to someone else’s hands, and her soft skin, her soothing touch, her firm arms wrapping around her, massaging her, caressing her, pulling at her hair —
“Oh, isn’t that Lottie?” Nat, pulled back down to reality by the name of her girlfriend, followed the direction of Misty’s finger.
Lottie was standing with Jackie, Shauna, Ellie and a girl Nat didn’t recognize. The girl was tall — but not as tall as Lottie — with broad shoulders and a strong jaw. She seemed to be laughing at something Jackie said.
(Jackie probably said something stupid yet oddly charming, in true Jackie Taylor fashion.)
“Let’s go say hi!” Chirped Misty, her voice squeaky and high pitched with excitement. “Oh, and they’re talking to Talia Martinez!”
“Martinez? No way—”
“Wait, is that—”
Misty cut Van off, answering their question before they could finish asking it.
“Coach Martinez’ daughter! She’s graduating from the Journalism program.” Misty replied, giggling before running off, dragging Van along with her. Van shot Nat an apologetic look before they disappeared into the crowd to meet up with the others.
“How did that old misogynist son of a bitch produce such a smoke show of a daughter?” Tai asked, laughing at the sound of Nat’s deep chuckle, her eyes still on their old coach’s daughter.
“Yeah, I don’t know. It’s honestly shocking.”
They stood there for a bit, an unspoken question weighing them both down, before Nat decided she would slice through the tension with the sharp blade of her words.
“Spit it out, Turner.”
Tai simply sighed at that, fiddling with the ring on her finger.
“You have to ask me something, right?” Nat said, pressing her friend. “So go ahead. Ask it.”
Nat nudged Tai, knocking their shoulders together in the childish way they had always done, ever since they were two lost, lonely kids in middle school.
And suddenly, as Nat looked into Tai’s eyes, she saw the same childish twinkle, the same excited glint, the same uncertainty in her eyes that was all so specific to that of a middle schooler’s disposition; and she was transported back to that conversation they had, all those years ago, when they only had each other and the world was cold and dark and lonely.
“Let’s move to New York City. Together. Like we always said we would.”
Nat didn’t answer right away, and Tai took it as permission to keep talking.
“Fuck New Jersey. Seriously. Come with me to the city. I have to move there for grad school anyway, you know? And that job you have — the music supervisor thing — wouldn’t it make more sense for you to be based in Manhattan?”
Tai was making very rational, solid points, arguing their case incredibly well. But what she didn’t realize was that Nat didn’t need convincing.
She was already in.
(She was in twelve years ago when Tai had first suggested it.)
***
Leaving Wiskayok was surprisingly easy — turned out a lot of people had the same idea — because no one wanted to spend the rest of their lives in the small New Jersey town they all grew up in. Nat thought it almost seemed like giving up, to stay in a town that smelt like suburban decay and had summers with the kind of sweltering heat that melted pavement and made babies cry.
Nat only really had to say goodbye to a handful of people.
Steve was by far the hardest. He wept in her arms like a newborn baby being held by its mother for the first time, and Nat just held him for hours, in the record store, during their last shift together, playing their favourite albums on vinyl until their ears bled and their tears ran out.
Toni was also hard to say bye to, but not as difficult as Steve. The now ex-roommates had a mutual fear of showing people their emotions that resulted in a formal goodbye handshake and then a long hug when they realized they were being stupidly casual about it all. Toni promised to visit everyone in the big city and Nat promised to visit her in her hometown of Boston.
Misty got a stable job in some local Wiskayok nursing home, but claimed she’d quit and follow everyone to New York City — so Nat wasn’t entirely sure whether or not it was truly goodbye. Misty was definitely a friendship she begrudgingly appreciated, but it was also the kind of relationship that Nat wouldn’t have been able to leave even if she tried.
The Yellowjackets had a going away party for everyone — over half the team was leaving New Jersey — and it was nice to talk to the other girls that Nat had less of a relationship with, like Mari, Gen, Akilah and Crystal.
Laura Lee was spending the summer in Berlin — her future after August up in the air — so everyone said bye to her like they wouldn’t see her again, just in case. Lottie had smiled sadly when Laura Lee announced her plans, and told Nat later about how she was sad to see her first friend go, but so happy for her that she was going to see the world and travel.
Shauna was heading to NYU to pursue her studies in literature and get the Masters degree she always dreamed of (and naturally wherever Shauna went, Jackie followed).
Jackie and Shauna, attached at the hip, codependent in a way that scared Nat, had already found a cute apartment near NYU and had boxes of their things ready to go.
Van was overjoyed with their newfound freedom and couldn’t wait to travel all over — but agreed to join Nat and Tai in New York for the next couple of months until they decided when they’d leave for Australia to connect with some long lost family.
Lottie had so much money from her family at her disposal that she could’ve done whatever she wanted, and it was easy for her to find a gorgeous apartment on the Upper East Side.
Tai, who had clutched her acceptance letter to NYU when she got it in the mail and couldn’t stop basking in the pride and glory she felt at finally realizing her dream of going to grad school in New York City, had her bags packed before she even formally graduated from her undergrad.
Nat was not packed. She was excited, but wary.
(And she had told herself that as long as she was more excited than wary, it would all be fine. But the wariness had started take over the excitment, creeping up on her, crawling up her throat and clawing at the insides of her mouth, begging to be released.)
Everything was changing, and Nat felt as though she was on a train platform, paralyzed from head to toe, unable to get on any of the high speed trains that zoomed past her from all directions. She could barely move her head, stuck in place, with the oppurtunity to go everywhere and nowhere all at her fingertips. But if she looked down at the weathered cobblestone at her feet, she would see a shadow next to hers in the shape of Lottie Matthews. And if she looked closer, she could almost catch a glimpse of a pair of translucent wings, flicking in and out of existence.
Nat didn’t need her mind’s eye to tell her Lottie Matthews was an angel, but it was a pleasant reminder.
***
When Lottie saw the ad for the apartment Nat and Tai were looking at, she crinkled her nose in disgust and shook her head violently.
“No way guys.”
Tai had found the apartment online after searching for a month, and had planned for them to visit it the day they got to New York. Nat thought it was nice enough, the pictures were well lit and clear and the apartment seemed spacious and clean. It was close to a subway and the guy renting it seemed like a sweet old man in his profile picture.
But Lottie seemed to have a different opinion.
“C’mon, it’s cute!” Nat said, swiping through the pictures yet again. “Look babe! There’s a big window in the common space so we’ll get so much sunlight! You love sunlight, right?”
Tai snorted at that because who didn’t love sunlight in their apartment, and then snatched the phone out of Nat’s hand.
“Listen, it is what it is. This is gonna be our apartment. The guy is basically ready to give it to us, the visit is mostly a formality at this point.” Tai said. “And like, yeah, we wanna see it, but he’s a decrepit old grandpa that probably doesn’t even own a cell phone, I don’t think he has the time to scam 23 years olds in between watching Jeopardy and taking his pills.”
Lottie just huffed and pouted in the cute way Nat loved.
“I don’t know guys. Something’s off. He has the eyes of a malevolent child.”
Nat and Tai laughed at that — because what does that even mean? — and Nat wrapped her arms around Lottie, kissing her softly in between chuckles, and they didn’t talk about it again.
***
When Lottie finally stepped foot in the apartment during their visit, she sighed a breath of relief, as if she hadn’t exhaled since seeing the ad.
It looked just like the pictures, and had a perfect beam of light that came in through the large window in the common area. Nat could easily picture Tai putting plants all over the place, basking in the sunlight, and then complaining about how Nat forgot to water them.
The old man, whose back was abnormally curved and hunched forward like he lived in a bell tower, was called Richard, but insisted they call him Ricky.
“Ok girls, Ricky's gonna head to the little boy’s room and let you take it all in. Then we can sign the papers.” Ricky said as he hobbled over to the bathroom.
At the sound of the door shutting, Nat turned to Lottie.
“See babe! It’s perfect.”
Nat reached over to slip her hand in Lottie’s, and she watched as her girlfriend sighed a little, puffing air out of her mouth as she pouted before forcing a faint smile on her lips.
“Don’t you find Ricky a little…” Lottie trailed off, her forehead lines showing as she scrunched her face in thought. “…babyish?”
Nat stared at the brunette for a moment, ready to come to the poor sweet old man’s defense. But she took a second to step back, reflecting on their interactions with Ricky, and all his weird quirks and word choices she overlooked due to her interest in the apartment.
Nat thought about how Ricky smelt like soap and baby powder and how he would occasionally referr to himself in the third person and how when he dropped his pen he crawled on all fours to pick it up instead of just bending down — and sure maybe it’s all a little strange, but it’s New York and there was no harm in a little oddity once and a while. It wasn’t a crime to be a little weird.
So Nat just ignored it all, and so did Tai.
“I don’t know, Lot.” Tai replied. “I mean, yeah, he’s fucking strange, but he’s also an old guy in New York, you know? If we didn’t get every apartment where the guy renting it was a little weird, we wouldn’t find anything in the city.”
Nat nodded in agreement with her friend, but kissed Lottie’s cheek in sympathy.
“You’re so cute when you’re all worried about me.”
Lottie smiled at Nat’s words, and leaned her head down slightly to rest against Nat’s.
“I just love you, you fucking loser.” Lottie said, smiling.
“I love you too.” Nat replied, kissing her again. “Besides, Ricky’s alright. He’s not that weird—”
The universe always did love playing dirty tricks on Nat.
(Nat thought to herself that there must be a higher power, because there’s no way all this shit just coincidentally happened to her. It had to be that someone up above was the world’s most unfunny prankster out to get her.)
As if on cue, Ricky returned, instantly shutting Nat up at the sight of him.
He was in nothing but a diaper and white crew socks. He was completely hairless, in an unnatural way, much like those sphynx cats with their wrinkly skin folded in on themselves.
“Wicky wanna pway!” He shouted in a jarring baby voice, shaking a rattle in his left hand.
“No. No. Nope. Not doing this. Nope.” Tai was instantly backing away, grabbing her bag and heading towards the door.
Nat couldn’t bring herself to move, a laugh threatening to erupt from inside her.
“Baby Wicky gonna poopoo!”
“Oh my god.” Lottie’s voice also contained a hint of laughter hidden beneath her words. “Let’s go, Nat.”
Nat let her girlfriend pull her away from Ricky, following Tai out of the apartment and then onto the busy and bustling New York streets.
The three girls glanced at each other, catching their breath, before bursting into laughter.
“What the fuck!”
“I literally have no words.”
They laughed so hard they were practically crying.
Just three New Jersey natives screeching and shouting on the curb at the corner of W 39th Street and 6th Avenue.
When their laughter died down, Lottie gently nudged Nat with her shoulder, leaning in for a kiss.
“Welcome to New York, baby.”
Nat dodged her lips, eyes widening.
“Please don’t call me baby for at least a month.”
***
Nat and Tai stayed with Lottie while they searched for an apartment, and while Lottie claimed she was happy to help, Nat knew it wasn’t a feasible set-up. Lottie’s apartment was beautiful, with a tall, ornate ceiling, giant pillars and vintage wallpaper covering the entirety of the walls. It was spacious for one person, but very cramped for three people. Nat and Tai were determined to relieve Lottie of their presence, and endlessly searched for an apartment of their own.
Tai tried to join Van in the motel they were staying at in Hell’s Kitchen but left instantly at the sight of a cockroach crawling across the front desk. Van had laughed and said that was just Benny, the local motel cockroach. Tai almost puked.
After another unsuccessful apartment visit — this time they were asked to participate in a blood sacrifice once a month instead of paying rent, which Nat found herself genuinely considering before Tai pulled her out of there — Nat and Tai headed over to a small coffee shop nearby to meet Lottie and drown their sorrows in stale pastries and burnt coffee.
Nat and Tai bickered in line like an old couple decades into their marriage, their voices beginning to rise over a whisper, with Lottie trying to play mediator.
“I’m just saying, like, maybe it wouldn’t have been so bad! A little blood for a month’s rent? I don’t know Tai, it’s not that insane if you think about it—”
“Oh my god, do you hear yourself? Has the New York City air already rotted your brain?” Tai snapped back, her eyes piercing through Nat like arrowheads sinking into their target.
“Okay guys, let’s take it down a couple decibels, shall we?” Suggested Lottie, a little annoyed.
Nat tried to lower her voice, but ended up shouting again.
“We can’t afford to be picky, Tai!”
“Not wanting to participate in a fucking blood sacrifice is not being picky !” Tai growled, gritting her teeth in anger.
Nat was ready to tear into her friend, not because she necessarily disagreed with her but because she was so frustrated with their inability to find a god damned apartment that she needed someone tangible to blame — and she couldn’t really yell at the state of the world and the government for not funding affordable housing — so screaming at Tai was just easier.
It was always easier to give into the flames that started to burn in the pit of her stomach.
But then Nat’s thoughts of anger and frustration dissipated as her ears perked up at the song playing in the cafe. She hadn’t noticed it before.
Hey you, big mood
Guide me to shelter
‘Cause I’m through when the two
Hits the six and it’s summer
The first track off Deftones’ Around the Fur washes over Nat, like a cool blanket being draped over her, putting out the fire ravaging inside her. She could practically feel her skin sizzle as the song engulfed her.
(Come) Shove it, shove it, shove it
(Shove) Shove it, shove it, shove it
(The sun) Shove it, shove it, shove it
(Aside) Shove it aside
“Are you fucking listening to me, Nat?” Tai’s voice punched through the calming illusion of the song.
“Hmm? Oh. Yeah.” Said Nat, a little dazed. “Sorry. You’re right. I’m just stressed. We really need to find a place.”
Tai looked at her friend sympathetically, her face suddenly devoid of all anger that was present moments before. Lottie seemed relieved that the argument was winding down.
“Yeah. I’m sorry too. I’m a little…intense. But I stand by what I said: no blood sacrifices.”
“No blood sacrifices.” Nat agreed.
They shook hands to make it official, with a little urgency, like if they didn’t then they’d both be tempted to go back and say yes to the strange lady.
“Lottie, is that you?” A voice from behind them said. Nat recognized the inflection somehow, but not the voice itself. She turned around and saw a familiar face with Coach Martinez’ eyes and bone structure, but a little shorter and more lean, with full lips and a kind smile (Coach never smiled).
“Talia! Hey! Oh my god. What are you doing here?” Lottie exclaimed, reaching over to hug the other girl.
“I moved here right after graduation. I got a cool internship at the New York Times but it pays peanuts so I’m at this shitty coffee shop to take advantage of their one dollar coffee.” Talia laughed like it wasn’t really impressive to be 23 straight out of university working for one of the biggest newspapers in the world.
“That’s amazing! Congrats!” Said Lottie.
“Oh, thank you!” Talie replied, suddenly a little bashful. “And you must be Tai and Nat? I don’t think we ever properly met, but I’ve seen you play.”
Tai reached over to shake Talia’s hand like they were in a fucking business meeting and not casually running into someone they knew from back home at a coffee shop.
They exchanged pleasantries for a bit, until the subject of apartment hunting came up, in which Tai groaned and complained about the woman they just met with, and Talia cry laughed at the thought of being propositioned for a blood sacrifice.
“You guys should move into my building! Our landlord is only the regular amount of annoying and greedy, and he's been looking for some new tenants to rent apartment 5. It’s not the best, but it’s also not the worst.” Talia said.
“Talia, I wouldn’t usually admit to this, but we’re like, insanely desperate, so that would be great.” Tai was smiling now, in less of a happy way and more of a crazy way. “Please give us the info.”
Nat would’ve laughed at Tai’s desperation if she wasn’t equally as desperate.
Talia gave them the address and the landlord’s info, and they all exchanged numbers before she waved goodbye as she headed out.
Nat found her kind of charming, in a different way than the way Lottie was charming or Jackie was charming or Tai was charming.
Lottie was charming in a multitude of ways, like the way she walked in a room with her long legs and slim figure and deep brown eyes, confident that she could get whoever she wanted but humble when asked, the way she would smile at you like you were the only person in the world, like you were special, giggling at a joke, leaning her head against you. Lottie was charming in every sense of the word.
Jackie was charming in the same way a 4 month old puppy was charming — she was stupidly endearing and had an air about her that just forced you to love her, even if she was being a bit of a bitch or being purposefully obtuse.
Tai was charming in the way a politician was charming, but minus the bullshit and empty promises. Tai knew what to say to strangers to get what she wanted, she knew the right tone to use depending on the circumstance. She was eloquent — she knew what to say and how to say it and who to say it to. Despite all of that, she always believed in everything she said. She didn’t just talk to talk.
But Talia was none of those things. She was charming in a boyish way, in a way that Nat found kind of annoying. Like she was the girl next door, like she’d bring you flowers at your doorstep and promise your parents she’ll have you home by midnight. Nat finds herself thinking how Talia’s calming presence would be great for Jackie’s extreme neuroticism, if only she’d stop sucking on Shauna Shipman’s tit.
Lottie nudged Nat gently, leaning to whisper in her ear.
“Do you think baby Ricky has a brother who also rents out apartments in New York?”
Nat chuckled a little at the thought of another Ricky running around, then shuddered.
“God, don’t even joke about that.”
***
Talia was right about the landlord of her building, he was just the average amount of creepy and gross — the amount you’d expect from a New York City landlord. His name was Bill and he spent most of their visit talking about his entire life story, which happened to be shockingly similar to the plot of Forrest Gump.
Nat and Tai signed the papers quickly, as if they were scared it would fall through their fingers like water.
They moved in right away, with Lottie, Van and Ellie coming to help on the first day, and then Jackie and Shauna coming the next day to help them settle in.
Nat couldn’t help but laugh at Jackie answering the door and making the strangest sound of surprise when found herself face to face with Talia Martinez.
“Oh.” Jackie made another strangled noise, then cleared her throat.
Talia raised an eyebrow at Jackie’s odd reaction. “Expecting someone else?”
Jackie seemed to shake herself out of whatever weirdness possessed her and just grunted out something about not showing up to someone’s place uninvited.
“Sorry to disappoint.” Talia smiled that boyish, knowing smile of hers, and Nat wondered if there was some weird tension between the two or she was just imagining it.
“Just wanted to welcome you to the building!” She said to Nat and Tai, walking in past Jackie and dropping a box of toilet paper rolls on their counter. “Call it a welcome gift, a peace offering, a sign of good neighbourly generosity. I always forget to buy toilet paper and my roommate hates me for it, so I figured I’d let you have a head start on the toilet paper runs.”
Nat laughed and Tai punched her on the arm, recalling the night before when Tai realized they forgot to buy toilet paper after she broke their bathroom in by taking a massive shit. Nat made her beg before she went to pick some up.
“Thanks man.” Nat said. “Tai really appreciates it.”
Tai punched her again, harder.
“Asshole.”
Nat thought back to middle school Nat and Tai, and their big dreams and visions of the future, and she wondered if Tai ever saw herself stuck on the toilet bowl of their shitty new apartment with no toilet paper and only Nat to rely on.
“Well don’t hesitate to call if you need anything. My roommate Leah is a hermit lit major so she’s almost always home studying. Grad school amirite? Disgusting.” Talia went on, laughing and smiling. “Oh and Bill’s definitely a pathological liar, but don’t question his stories. They’re almost all taken straight from movies but he gets weird when you call him out on it.”
Talia made her way back to the door as if to leave, but seemed to suddenly remember something important and spun around.
“Oh! Also, your next door neighbour Earl thinks that lizard people have infiltrated the government and he will try to sell you his pamphlets. But he’s harmless.”
And with that, Talia left, leaving Jackie, Tai and Nat a little speechless.
Nat eyed the toilet paper, and tried to hold in a laugh, but ended up just snickering to herself like a school boy trying to avoid being scolded by his teacher.
Tai caught sight of her and punched her in the ribs.
“Fuck off.”
Nat just laughed again.
She could get used to this.