Chapter Text
Peter Parker sat down near Gwen Stacy’s grave, the sky was evenly gray and the cool air swirled around making the snowflakes dance away and float around. It’s been only a week since he came back to his universe.
“I wonder how Peter 2 and Peter 1 are doing right now.” He whispered to Gwen, while his fingers brushed through the colorful daisies he bought for her. “I’m Peter 3 you know? I guess 3 is just the best number,” he shrugged remembering the chaos of that night around his brothers from another universe, literally.
“Honestly Gwen, if you only could’ve seen them—see us. They were truly amazing, and the way we all connected and then we were shooting webs, the synchronicity that I experienced— I never had that. It was as if we could read each other’s minds and wow—it was fucking cool.“
Peter sighed, a hue of vapor escaped his lips. “I bet you saw it though, how I saved MJ? Peter 1’s girlfriend, I did what I couldn’t do for you Gwen. I’m sorry, I'll always be sorry for that.”
Adjusting his beanie tighter to his head when a sudden wave of wind made his skin form goosebumps. Deep in his heart he could feel that Gwen was actually listening to his banter, that this was her way of telling him that things were okay between the two.
Peter went to see Gwen every week, she was the love of his life, he was certain of it. But the truth was that Peter had lost all hope on love after Gwen.
He’d be lying if he denied the fact that he had found himself thinking of what Peter 2 said to him; that things worked out fine eventually in the love department, it put the seed of curiosity in him, what if things actually changed for him, in his heart, and he could finally let Gwen rest. He was clinging to her memory like a life jacket, if he let go he would drown, he would lose himself to the darkness.
His phone buzzed as a message showed him a text of the police department trying to contact Spider-Man.
“Gotta go Gwen, I’ll see you next week. Love you so much.” He put a kiss on his palm to then let it linger on her tombstone.
In a hidden part of an alley he put his mask on, he had to put his stuff between some garbage bags so people wouldn’t steal it, there wasn’t much to steal there, still he plastered it with web fluid, a force of habit. He swung between tall buildings and across streets, hearing sudden gasps and shouts announcing his presence in the city. It was funny how things had actually changed for him in the span of years; The Daily Bugle seemed to stop with the nasty propaganda; he was now on good terms with the police, he also had free health insurance thanks to the police department and he was doing well financially. Stark Industries was a place he never thought he would find a spot to fit in, to do the research he felt drawn to.
There were big threats still in New York but Peter didn’t feel that dread whenever he fought, the constant fear of losing someone he loved, those being the benefits of being alon e, but how alone could you be to start missing the company of a partner after years of being lonesome?
Spider-Man quickly solved the robbery near the upper east side, it wasn’t a major thing, the thieves got webbed and delivered to the detectives, he got a bullet wound in his shoulder but nothing some tweezers, Neosporin and a bandage couldn’t solve. Peter was even able to do so by himself now: the perks of being alone .
Peter had received several injuries and even more deeper wounds than the one he had on his shoulder but this one time as he shoot a strand of web coming from his right arm—the wounded one—his arm didn’t find it easy to carry his weight, and he was feeling somewhat dizzy, he thought it was the blood lose, because he hadn’t received a kick to the head nor anywhere his body could react the way it was doing now. He found himself screaming as he fell from a twenty four storage building.
“Watch out! Spider down!”
His instincts shouted at him to use his other web shooter, he did so, but Peter was being a little clumsy today. Slow motion turned on in his brain. The web-thread splashed on the building in front of him, but the height wasn’t enough to make him swing by without any implications. The chime of a bicycle bell was his only warning. After that he felt the clash of his body against something warm and then he rolled on the cold concrete.
That was embarrassing. People screamed and sooner than what Spider-Man could recover, people were surrounding him to help him get up.
“I’m fine, don’t worry.” He spoke under the mask, his shoulder throbbing with every move.
It took him a few seconds to register what just happened. He saw a mint green bike with a twisted handlebar, a bunch of flowers scattered and crushed on the ground and then panic started to bubble in his chest. A girl—a young woman was sitting on the wet asphalt, a few people were kneeling by her side as she held her arm against her chest.
Spider-Man ran to her side, pushing the pedestrians lightly. Squatting down, his eyes scanning her, a scrape on her cheek and forehead on the same side of what he guessed was an injured arm.
“I am so sorry, I swear this isn’t me, I mean it is me but I don’t know what happened I don’t— are you alright? Can I help you with anything?”
The woman had pools of tears on the rim of her eyes, she was holding them in, because that was just humiliating, she was late for the delivery and now she had lost the bouquets and she didn’t dare to accuse The Spider-Man of her bad luck. The day was not a good one since the start. This was the ultimate confirmation.
“No, Spider-Man… sir, It’s not your fault, I just, I think I broke my arm.” She was barely able to pronounce the words, she was in terrible pain, how could she know?
“Oh, let me see.” Peter gulped under the mask, his stomach churning. He had broken the woman’s arm, this was bad. Taking her elbow she winced, tears finally slipped down her cheeks, shit. “ Ms. I need to take you to the hospital.”
“No, no I have work, I can't go to the hospital now.” He saw the panic take over her features.
“It’s the least I could do. I caused this, please let me do something.”
Guilt was eating him alive, the more time he spent there with all the witnesses watching and telling her she should take Spider-Man’s word.
She felt a little hazy on the head, like when you take a pill to not get dizzy on a long road trip, and everything starts to lose sense, sounds muffling. She shook her head trying to keep the masked hero away, she had to work, she needed to gather the flowers and—
“Ms.?” Spider-Man felt panic, a rush of blood like his spider senses were going off.
Her eyes rolled backwards and she went limp on his arms.
“No, no, no.” he mumbled, taking her in his arms he did what he could to swing through the city to reach the nearest hospital.
People, nurses, doctors, they all came to a halt when they saw Spider-Man arrive carrying a woman on his arms, this was quite the scene Peter could imagine but he was not able to think straight not when he had hurt someone—by mere accident that was true, yet the guilt was so heavy he felt like he could cry under the mask.
“I need help please!” He shouted and as if he had broken a curse, nurses and doctors moved again, some of them walking towards him.
“What happened?” a nurse asked as they started moving him to a nearby stretcher.
“Uh, I… she had an accident on her bike and I think her arm is broken and she has a concussion or something I’m not sure.”
The nurse nodded as they put oxygen on the girl quickly moving her to the ER. Peter followed them until someone stopped him. “Sorry man, you can’t come in.”
“Oh, yeah ok. I’ll just wait.”
“You need to get yourself fixed too.” The same nurse told him, pointing to his shoulder. “You’re ruining the floor.”
Peter’s eyes looked down and there, from his shoulder all the way down to his finger tips a thread of blood was dripping down, leaving crimson drops on the floor.
“Sorry,”
A minute later another nurse got to him and made him follow her into a room.
“We know you can’t reveal your identity and if people keep on seeing you out there they’re gonna start asking questions and it’s gonna be messy. So mister Spider-Man can you take off your suit? The mask can stay on, I need to clean that.”
Peter was a bit shocked still and maybe the blood loss was not helping so he nodded, his suit landed at his feet in a pool or red and blue, at least he was wearing a nice pair of boxers.
“I recommend you to come back later, you will only cause drama here, mister Spider-Man”
The nurse said and Peter just watched her work.
He was good as new in no time. His head felt light still but he managed to swing back to where he put his belongings in that alley. With the last bits of adrenalin still in him, he swung back to May’s, he sat on his old bed, suit on, mask off. The uneasiness he felt in his chest was suffocating. Why did he leave the hospital then? He couldn’t be at peace now. And why did he end up at May’s when he had his own apartment in Manhattan?
Maybe his injury affected his brain, his eyes checked his shoulder and the little wound was almost closed, thank goodness for fast healing but what about those who didn’t have that… What about the girl?
He wanted to make sure the girl he hurt was okay, it was an obvious statement. Yet he couldn’t go as Peter because he didn’t know anything about her and ugh, he grunted against his hands. Then he could go as Spider-Man. He knew the nurses would let him in if he asked kindly. However, he was scared of the reaction of the girl, what would she think of him of his idiocy. Spider-Man was not known for hurting pedestrians, he was supposed to save them not harm them.
His phone chimed from inside his backpack, Peter was on a streak of bad luck.
The news on his mistake quickly spread, he shook his head reading the article The Bugle had just released, how were they so fast? He wondered as his messages continued to pop up, Jonah Jameson wanted photos of Spider-Man, Peter’s former boss couldn’t let the other news sites win the exclusive so when it came to Spider-Man he still contacted Peter for exclusive photos, and Peter delivered, just because the news always made him look nice, but not this time.
Peter groaned even louder, this was not how he planned his day to go. Whenever he visited Gwen he usually had the best experiences afterwards, once he found a fifty dollar bill on the subway, just lying there on a seat, and then there was this other time where he got a free coffee because the owner proposed to her girlfriend and the drinks were free.
But that luck seemed to be long gone.
“Peter, are you in there?”
Peter’s heart jumped, he didn’t know May was home. “Yes it’s me, May!”
“Are you okay?"
“Um, yeah. I just got work to do and you know me… I’m complaining.”
“With the amount of hours you work I’d complain too. Are you heading out? I need you to bring me some bread and milk, are you staying the night, right?”
“Yeah, sure, May. Why not! Are you working today?”
“Yes, but the car is at the mechanic,” Shit , Peter totally forgot about that, he made a mental note to give May some money to get that car fixed.
“At what time you’re off?” he asked, putting a pair of sweatpants and a hoodie on. “Do you want me to pick you up?” he said, opening the door.
May shook her head, a sweet smile on her face. “No, Peter. Jamie, my coworker is driving me back, you’re fine. Just don’t come back too late okay.”
Her hand caressed Peter’s cheek, making his anxious body feel slightly better. He gave her palm a light kiss and nodded. “Of course not May, when have I been late for our weekly dinners?”
He let out a chuckle watching May drop her hand as she rolled her eyes, she shook her head and with a tired sigh she only added. “Don’t forget the bread and milk!”
“I won’t!”
His smile dropped once he heard his phone buzz again. Plopping on the bed, with furrowed eyebrows, and a guilty mind, he took the decision he guessed was the most appropriate, maybe was a little over the top either way his hazy mind was calling the shots for the day.
He found himself crawling up the walls of the hospital at night, after finding the girl’s room. Spider-Man found a way in, the windows were tiny but not too tiny to not let him sneak his body inside. Crazy , he knew, he had no other option.
Seemed like none of her family members got informed because no one was there making her company. Peter felt even worse. Gulping, he took a step closer to her bed, she was sleeping. It gave him enough time to assess the damages he caused. She had butterfly closures on her forehead, her lips were chapped and her arm was in a cast resting on her stomach. Her face was resting on the pillow in a weird angle almost over her left shoulder.
The IV made a rhythmic noise with each drop, the monitors were checking her heart rate. Somehow seeing her like that made the guilt and worry grow, Peter wanted to fix this.
His eyes landed on a clipboard over a table at the feet of the bed. He grabbed it and checked every detail. Name y/n, heart skipped a beat, now her face had a name. You were a year younger than him, you had health insurance, well that was something good he could cross from the list of his doing wrongs.
No concussions, no internal bleeding, you had surgery on your broken arm, Peter winced, the radius broke in two and now you were half a robot with the pins and rods attaching your bone together. That definitely was not helping Peter feel better.
“Shit,” he mumbled, placing the clipboard back down. His hands were up to his head.
When his eyes found your face you were looking at him, with wide eyes and parted lips, Peter felt his soul leaving his body.
“Jesus fuck!” He gasped a hand on his chest. “You scared me,”
“I—um sorry? I’m, what… how did you get in?”
His hands went to his hips and shrugged. “Through the bathroom window.”
“Why?” you tried to reincorporate on the bed but whined when you moved your arm, like you forgot you had it in a cast.
“Because there was no other way to get in,”
“But there’s a door there,” you pointed with your head. “It’s easier,”
Peter furrowed, you were not able to see him. He sighed. “Yeah, I know that. But it’s the anonymity of the visit that I want to keep… anonymous.”
What was he saying now!
He shook his head. “Um, how are you feeling?”
You scoffed, Peter deserved that disdain. “Like shit, well not as bad because I’m on medication but still not great with a useless arm.”
The casted one got up as if to show him, he nodded. Taking a step closer, his hands grasped the plastic railing at the feet of the bed.
“I can imagine— I owe you an apology, I wasn’t feeling too well and it wasn’t my intention to hurt you… or anyone. I don’t do that, you know? Goes against the hero thing.”
Your eyes were shining either for the low lights coming from outside or because you were on very strong medications, Peter couldn’t tell, what he saw was a little smile on your lips.
“I suppose it’s not on the hero policy… It's fine Spider-Man, sir.”
Peter chuckled. “Spider-Man it’s fine, I’m not as old as you may think I am.”
You cocked an eyebrow. “Really? I thought you were like thirty five or something.”
“Ouch, I… hmm no, no I—listen. I'm gonna tell you this because I think I owe you something so I’ll answer this one concern of yours, I'm around your age. So think twice before calling me old again, young lady.”
Now he saw a full smile blossom in your face, it made him feel better, a lightness finally reaching his sore shoulders.
“Um okay,” you laid deeper on your pillow, a smile still tugging at the corner of your lips.
Peter felt suddenly so overly conscious of his body and presence in front of you in a dark room, the darkness was helping but he felt your eyes on him as he paced around.
“Do you know how many days you are gonna be here?” he asked.
“I have no idea, I woke up surrounded by people, then I passed out when the nurse extended my arm and woke up like two hours ago to go pee and then fell asleep and then you were here.”
“That bad huh?” Peter crossed his arms as he leaned his back on the wall right in front of you.
“The pain was bad, but now it’s light. I do feel like I’m in a cloud when I don’t move.”
“That must be nice,” his back cracked unbidden.
“That, on the other hand, sounds bad… Are you better now? or why did you crash into me?”
Peter blinked, scratched his forehead and watched you, you looked tiny and sleepy.
“I got a bullet wound right here,” he touched his clavicle. “Lost blood and that’s when I accidentally crashed into you I was feeling dizzy, but yes I am better now.”
“I see… well, at least you are not in risk of losing your job,”
Peter straightened, a knot in his throat. “You lost your job? because of me?”
You bit the inside of your cheek, making his agony longer.
“Not really, just my weekly payment. My dad’s the owner so he wouldn't fire me, but still he didn’t even come see me, so” you shrugged. “you’re all good Spider-Man.”
“Hmm for what it’s worth I am truly sorry and I want to make it up to you, so if you need anything, really I am here for you.” Peter walked to your side, his hand lingered over your shoulder, debating himself if the touch would be too much.
“I don’t think I need anything, but thank you.” you were blinking more often, heavier.
“Are you sure?” his hand dropped by his side, forming a fist.
He wanted you to ask him a favor he wanted to feel useful, to prove to you he was good and not an asshole.
Your eyes grew big for a moment. “Wait, there is something… but I don’t think it’s safe,”
Peter clasped his hands together. “I’ll do it, what is it? I mean I’m Spider-Man, if something is not safe I am your guy, I do unsafe things for free all the time.”
“Hmm… right, okay yeah. I mean it’s not safe for me but why not, what else could happen to me, right?”
You laughed, Peter grimaced, fair enough.
“My dog, I have a little dog and he hasn’t been fed since I left this morning so… I mean if you don’t have any crime to fight right now, would you feed him?”
And his heart melted, maybe because you looked very worried and the way you were observing him made his chest flutter.
“Yeah, of course. I love dogs, I can do that, easy peasy. You got it!”
You grinned at him, teeth and sparkly eyes, Peter felt weird.
He let you explain how much food he had to put on his plate, and to refill his water bowl as well, to not step on his little grass square where he peed and to leave the window just ajar for the air to circulate.
And at the end you gave him your address, hesitation still on your voice, but Peter promised you he was going in and out fast.
“I’ll check on you later okay?” Spider-Man said, as he walked to the bathroom.
You nodded, giving him a lipped smile. “You can use the door,”
“Nah, not my style… see ya later y/n.”
Peter struggled to get out, it wasn’t as easy as getting in. He considered using the door next time.
Your apartment was small, not too small but it wasn’t big as in rich family kind of big. But it was small as in cozy. Your dog, Percy, was barking at him as he entered through your room’s window. It smelled like coconut, he sighed.
When he opened the door to reveal the hall leading to the living room, Percy jumped at his legs, looking at him with curiosity, and the barking resumed. Peter started petting him on his tiny head and as soon as Peter reached his bag of food, Percy sat at his feet.
“Oh good boy!” He scratched tiny Percy on the back of his ear. “Okay, Percy, show me your bowl…”
It surprised Peter to see Percy run from the kitchen to the spot dedicated to the little Yorkiepoo, two bowls rested side by side on a corner as his bed was placed right beside the largest couch in the room. Toys were scattered around and Peter smiled.
“Okay so your kind owner said half a cup and two treats, right?” Percy tilted his head, Peter laughed. “You are too cute”
The bowls got filled with the respective things and as Percy ate throwing Spider-Man curious looks, Peter roamed around the room. His mask forgotten on the couch. You were messy but not too messy, your apartment was clean and you had flowers everywhere. A big vase of daisies in your bedroom. Another one with lavender carnations and purple monte casinos, it made your house smell fresh. He watched a photo of you with friends and he noticed how different you looked, dressed up in casual clothes, hair brushed and yes, without a cast on the arm.
You were pretty, he noticed, how your hair fell over your shoulders and your eyes were big and sparkly. Maybe your eyes were always shining.
A bark took him out of the trance, Percy was at his feet again looking up to him. Peter squatted down and patted the dog, until the latter laid on his back showing Peter his chubby belly.
“You want me to scratch your belly? Okay, but just once because I have to go, still need to go buy some stuff you know? I need to fight bad guys and do groceries, not like you!” he kept on scratching until Percy moved his back legs as if he wanted to scratch himself. “Look at you, living your best life.”
With a sigh, Peter stood up. Ready to go back to his life, this has been a nice way to stop for a second but for him there were not many breaks.
A flick of a wrist, the window slid open a little, he gathered his web with his hand so Percy wouldn’t eat it, put his mask on and jumped off the balcony window.
Spider-Man had a busy night, some guys robbed a few trucks with chemicals inside that ended with an explosion on a dock. He felt a bruise forming on his back and arms, but he managed to get out of there, leaving the robbers webbed onto a wall of a building, the police and the firemen arrived in time for him to take a minute to recover from the smoke and the harsh hits his body received.
He filled in the police with the information and as the sun emerged, the warm sun beams calmed the pain and the coolness of his bones as he made his way back to the hospital.
Spider-Man was not in condition to sneak in through the smallest window in the room, so he entered through the emergency exit and took the elevator. People threw him furtive looks, a kid hugging his mom’s arm had his eyes glued to him, so he did what any other person would do, Peter waved at him and the kid beamed. With excuses and hand gestures Peter sighed, exiting the elevator, no nurses were around but once he entered your room, he got surprised by the one nurse who had received you a day before.
“Oh mister Spider-Man, good to see you.” She smiled at him and Peter saluted her as she made her way to the door. “She is ready to go,” she winked at him and Peter knitted his brows together.
His eyes landed on you, gathering your stuff in a tote bag as best as you could, your left arm was not as trained as the right, he noticed.
“Hey!” he said, waving at you.
You nodded. “Would you help me?”
“Sure,” Peter opened the bag and you literally threw everything in.
“Thanks… how was your night?” you asked, dark circles around your eyes.
Peter shrugged, regretting it instantly as his muscles complained. “Nothing out of the ordinary. What about you?”
You sat down on the bed. “I feel weird, but okay I guess.”
“Are you walking home?”
“Nope, got to go see how work is doing and then I’ll go home.”
Peter nodded, well… this must be it then. “Percy is a cute dog, very well behaved.”
It made you smile, hence Peter did so too. “He is… thank you by the way, for checking on him and for coming by too. You didn’t have to but you did anyway.”
Peter felt a flush and warmth coming for his cheeks. “Nah, it’s nothing. As I said I owed you so it was the least I could do, really. I’m glad you are okay, sorry for the arm though.”
Peter smiled even if you couldn’t see.
“Well, it was fun to see the famous Spider-Man up close. No offense but hope this is the last time,”
“Ouch, no, yeah I get it, hope that too. Don’t get in trouble, okay?”
“You got it Spider-Man.”
You looked at your feet and the whole mood in the room felt weird, so Peter knew this was his cue.
“I’m gonna go now, need a bit of rest after a long night. See you… well… yeah whatever, bye y/n.”
He heard you chuckle, Peter shook his head feeling a bit dumb, closing the door at his back he made his way out the hospital.
When he got back to May's, he came to the realization that he didn’t buy the bread nor the milk, May made sure to remind him.
“PETER!”
“I’m on it, May! Sorry!”
Peter was late for his date, his date with Gwen. He fell asleep on the subway and now he had to swing all the way back to get her weekly bouquet.
The place where he always bought flowers was closed, mumbling obscenities as he crossed the street.
How funny was that only half a block down another flower shop was open.
He bought flowers only for Gwen and for May’s birthday, so he didn’t know much about them other than the classic red roses for his aunt and the colorful daisies for Gwen. His jaw almost hit the floor seeing the flowers on display, buckets of color and the smell so fresh and so sweet and so magical.
After a second of admiring the shop he went to the desk where a guy was wrapping pink roses for a woman. He gave him a lipped smile which Peter replied with a nod.
“How much for a small bouquet of daisies?”
The guy waved to the woman and put all his attention on Peter. “What kind?”
“Um.. normal? I don’t know.”
The guy looked at him funny. “We have pink daisies, african, chicory, fire wheel, gerberas, japanese…”
“Just the cheapest bouquet you can give me.”
Peter was late and he was not in the mood to know the kinds of flowers. He also forgot his wallet and now he had like ten dollars to survive the day.
“Okay…” the guy shook his head. “Y/n,”
Peter’s heart skipped a beat.
Suddenly you appeared from a door he hadn't noticed until now, cast still on, but you looked healthier.
“What?!”
“Price for a bouquet of daisies…”
“What kind?” you sounded exasperated.
“Cheap,” the guy said in a tone that made Peter want to roll his eyes.
You squinted at the guy and Peter almost laughed. “Umm… eight dollars.” You finally looked at Peter.
Peter felt naked without the mask, and even if it was a crazy idea that he would deny later on the day, he, deep inside, was hoping you’d recognize him.
“Uh, um yeah that’s okay.” Peter spoke, a little choked.
“What colors do you want?” you asked him.
“All of them?”
It made you smile. “Nice.”
And you disappeared through the door, Peter let out the trapped air in his lungs.
The guy was just staring at him weirdly. “cash or card?”
“Cash,”
“Of course.”
Peter furrowed his eyebrows, offended. “Whatever man, I don’t want anything, thanks.”
Peter came out of the store mad, upset, shocked and disappointed. Crossing the street he tried to look for another flower shop. He didn't care he was late anymore, Gwen was a priority and he shouldn’t feel this shitty prior to his date.
“Hey, hey… dude..”
He heard and looked over his shoulder, you were running towards him, a bouquet in hand, cheeks red and no coat on. Were you crazy or what?
Peter stopped and waved his hands to stop you.
“You forgot your flowers!” you said, a hue of vapor came out of your lips.
“I didn't pay for them,”
“I know,” you looked embarrassed. “Sorry about Jerry, he's a little bitch, here take them! They’re on the house.”
Peter’s eyes went from your eyes to the happy perky daisies on your hand.
“I will follow you around until you take them.” You grinned. “Go on.”
Peter with a little smirk on her lips, sighed. “Just because you have no coat on and it’s freezing… Thank you.”
“It’s my pleasure, have a nice day.”
Your smile made him feel funny inside. “Yeah you too.”
Pivoting on your post you made your way back, Peter stood there perched, waiting for you to get inside the shop again, his cheeks went fully red when you looked back at him and smiled.
“No,” he simply said, shaking his head making his way to see Gwen.