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Ed was looking for Izzy when Jim and Lucius stopped her in the corridor. She was exhausted from crying the previous night. As she and Stede dressed each other, they agreed she would be better at talking to Izzy. Apparently they used to get in pretty rough fights while she slept in the early morning. Every conversation they had without her in November and December ended in a bruise or a cut. She never knew- they always hid it. Patching each other up and coordinating the lie helped them learn to get along. Stede worried they’d regress, and she didn’t disagree. “Hey, kids,” she forced a smile, turning herself sideways in an attempt to slip between them. Lucius placed a hand on her elbow and guided her to turn back to the cabin. Jim slotted themself against their other side, far more intimidating and forceful in the way they led her. “Oh shit?” She laughed, bemused and curious enough to let it happen.
“We have some concerns, Ed.” Lucius said and she raised her eyebrows. “It’s not like that- nothing serious.”
Jim pushed open the door and stede looked up from his desk. He sat there for a few hours every morning and evening, pouring over books and papers in his reading glasses with a quill in his hand. She could never tell if he was really working, or just trying to look busy. It was cute either way. “Oh, what’s going on?”
“Mutiny, I assume,” she said flatly with a shrug and a smirk. “Kill me if you want, but please,” she begged theatrically, “spare my boys.”
Jim snorted, “you know we’d kill Hands first.” They strode across the room to the wardrobe, “Do you have anything black and sturdy? Something you can wash blood out of?” They opened the wardrobe and closed it upon finding only suits, “Ed, where do you keep your clothes?”
Ed draped herself across the couch, craning her head on the back of it until she could see Stede at his desk. She’d insisted on having a couch there, so that she could bother him while he worked. He smiled at her. “Can’t promise they’d fit anyone,” she hummed, stretching and making sure to block Stede’s view of his papers with her arm.
He gave up on his work, lacing his fingers with hers. He played with the smocked cuff of her shift and tilted his head at Jim and Lucius, “I’m sorry, what’s actually happening?”
Lucius sat across from Ed with a serious expression. “We need to consider redesigning Blackbeard.”
“You’re settling.” Jim said, meeting Ed’s eye meaningfully with their arms folded. “You’d be better at the raids without the costume. You don’t sell it anymore, you’re obviously uncomfortable.”
She sat up and shrugged, adjusting her fichu. “I dunno, I kinda like the trousers and jacket.”
Stede combed his fingers briefly through what he could of her hair by her scalp. She tilted her head and he shifted to her beard, where his fingers could run through unobstructed. Nobody had said anything about it yet, positive or negative. She hadn’t let it grow in as fast as it could have, nervously trimming it down, but it was finally long enough to start really curling and she loved it. The way Stede treated her beard just like the rest of her hair, like maybe he thought it was pretty too, made her dizzy. She wanted to pull him over the desk and kiss him, even if she’d be upside down. For fear he’d stop petting her, she just leaned in. “What if you wore your stays with them?” He offered.
She opened her eyes and strained to look at him, “would that look alright, do you think?” She twisted a ring around her finger and tried, not for the first time, to imagine it. She worried her stays would be too long to show any skin at the waistband the way she liked.
Jim frowned and Ed couldn’t tell if they were concerned or disappointed. “Does It stress you out that people outside of the crew will see you?”
Edward flinched and covered it with a scoff. “No,” she lied, poorly, her shoulders tense and her stomach twisting. She hated lying, and they all knew too much to be fooled.
“Oh, darling,” Stede said gently, abandoning his writing desk to sit with her and hold her hand. “If anyone says anything,” he cupped her cheek and drew a line beneath her eye with his thumb, “We’ll just keel haul them.” Ed laughed softly and he smiled wider, “I think if you find something sleeveless to go under it, the stays would look great with your leather.”
Ed bit her lip and it was tightly drawn by her grin, “yeah, I mean, I’ve got a few sleeveless shifts? A couple are black. But they’re too long.”
Lucius pursed his lips, his brows creased “I didn’t know you had those.”
“She likes the volume,” Stede fluffed the gathers in her sleeves. “More room for lace insertion, smocking, and pintucks. Fine needlework suits her so well.”
Ed felt her face burn. “Or, y’know, keeps the sun off.”
“Well, if you never wear them, just cut em,” Jim suggested with a shrug.
“Oh, yeah like right under the tabs?” Lucius grinned conspiratorially as Stede got up and rushed off to Ed’s closet behind the bookshelf. “That slutty bit of belly’s a pretty crucial element of the Blackbeard charm.”
She snorted, “oh, I thought my job in the raids was to look scary.”
Jim raised their eyebrow and watched the bookshelf, listening to the movement inside. “Is that why you wear half a skin-tight shirt? For intimidation?”
“Yeah,” she lied again, more convincingly this time, because it was easier when she wasn’t serious, “they see my cool fuckin scars like ‘oof what happened there? Wouldn’t wanna mess with them,’” she put her hands up and tilted her head away. She laughed and let her hands fall to her lap, “and the scars are hot, everyone thinks so.”
Lucius leaned back, the blood draining quickly from his face, “no, they’re really fucked up, actually.” He looked ill and upset, hugging himself. “I can’t help thinking about like, the logistics of it? Like how are you-“ he laughed, but his brow was tight, “how are you still alive?”
“I think the scars are sick,” Jim said. They smiled, but they tried to hide it behind their finger, “I wanna be like you if I grow up.”
Lucius twisted in his seat to look at Jim, “when do you figure that’ll be?”
“Fourty,” Ed suggested just as Jim answered the exact same. Stede slipped out from her closet, arms full of black leather, and cut across the room to the alcove. He called Ed and she stood with a dramatic sigh, “but I just got dressed.”
“Alright, but now you have to try on something else,” he said with mock impatience. He waited for her to join him at the bed and drew the curtain closed and smiled at her, glancing at her lower lip. “May I?” He asked softly, as if he was afraid to be heard past the curtain. She nodded eagerly and fought back a grin. It was hard to properly kiss when she was too busy smiling. They’d only really had the night and the morning to practice, but she thought they were getting better at fitting together. He was careful with her in a way she’d never experienced. She couldn’t get over how strange it was to kiss before sex- to kiss at all. She’d fucked in every way she could imagine, but kissing was always too intimate. She wondered if he could feel her heart rush. She’d forgotten how to breathe and he pulled away laughing. “You always look so…” he whispered and trailed off, looking to the side with his smile caught in his teeth.
She took the leather from his hands and laid it out on the bed. “Something good?” She asked hopefully, slipping pins from the front of her mantua.
He blushed at the sight of her stays beneath and retrieved her pin pillow from his coat pocket. “Well, I don’t care either way, right? But I do think it’s cute.” He tucked away her dress pins and helped her guide her mantua off her shoulders. “I’m surprised, I guess. I assumed you had so much more experience than me”
She paused, her eyebrows raised. “I’m not a virgin,” Her face burned and it sounded like a lie in her own ears. “I fucked Jack and he never shut up about it.”
“Yeah, I’d thought so,” he pulled her fichu free from the lacing of her stays, leaving her shoulders bare. “But then we kissed and now I’m not so sure.” He set the pins and fichu down, “it’s alright that you’re a virgin, darling, I really don’t mind. I’d hardly count Mary anyway.” He reached behind her to untie her apron and the fronts of her petticoats all at once. He’d gotten good with knots. Her shift felt thin.
She snatched her fichu back up to hide her face in it. “I’m not!” He untied the bow of waistbands at her belly and her petticoats fell in a heap of black and white linen around her feet. “You were just my first kiss, is all,” she admitted.
“Fuck, how old are you?” Jim asked incredulously from the other side of the curtain, followed immediately by Lucius’ hissed reprimand. Ed nearly screamed into her fichu.
“That’s so sweet,” he cooed quietly, stepping around her to unlace her stays. She listened to the silk cord slide through the eyelets and let it soothe her. Stede never judged her. “I hope you don’t regret it.” He eased her stays open enough to ease them down over her hips and she stepped out of them.
She stood in her shift, nearly shaking with anticipation, knowing it would come next. Stede never seemed to take much interest in anything but the task when he undressed her. “You were the best choice, mate,” she whispered.
He sighed heavily and laughed, “oh, good.” He began to guide the hem of her shift up, gathering it in his hands. Ed bit her lip and lifted her arms. She tilted her hips and held her head high, trying to pose as attractively as possible. He kissed the back of her shoulder and turned to find the black shift. She tried to bury the disappointment. She couldn’t get through helping Stede change his blouse without giggles and heavy, leering stares. She liked how she looked, and he told her she was pretty, but maybe she just wasn’t stunning in the way he was. She could be okay with that, eventually.
Stede was losing his mind. She was so gorgeous, and he loved her so much. When he saw her illustrated skin, and she was close enough to touch, he couldn’t think clearly. She encompassed his thoughts and rendered them nearly feral. He finally understood how a man should feel about his wife. Edward hadn’t invited that sort of intimacy in the same way she’d given him permission to dress her and ready her hair. He was well-trained in polite restraint and while curbing lecherous impulses was a low hurdle to cross, he was proud of himself for never showing a hint of how he wanted her. Of course, she definitely knew, but it seemed better not to let the fact loom over her head. He just needed to convince her that he was happy, because he really couldn’t imagine a better life than love and adventure. He wished he knew how to do that.
He helped her undress, so careful to keep his lingering hands romantic . Her white shift was thin, and he was angry at himself for even noticing the tension beneath the low dip of her satin stomacher. Her body’s reactions didn’t mean anything and they weren’t his business. It wasn’t his place to speculate if it had been the kiss or his hands undressing her- maybe his gaze, in the glances he couldn’t stop in time. It was presumptuous to think he had anything to do with it, or that it meant anything at all.
He thought staying behind her as he took her shift might have been easier on both of them. He still struggled. The curve of her spine led his eyes down to her scarred waist and charming hips. He wanted to pull her close. He allowed himself a chaste kiss on her shoulder. There was a dark, loose curl at the nape of her neck. His hands shook as he searched for her black shift, desperate to map out the form of her. He couldn’t find the neckline and making sure it was turned out the right way was impossible with her standing there so distractingly. Ed didn’t even know. She was so effortlessly enchanting that she didn’t notice her affect on people. She treated dressing like just another bothersome task, and Stede knew she didn’t like doing it more than she had to, but he was selfish. “Having trouble?”, she asked, peering over her shoulder with low-swept eyelashes and wide pupils. She had to know. There was too much mirth and knowledge in her eyes for there to be any misunderstanding. Edward was so perceptive, everything he tried to conceal must have been clear to her.
Stede choked. “Oh, I was just thinking about your hair,” he said, voice high and stressed. “Can’t let it down…” the last time she’d worn it down in a raid, the ends caught fire and it nearly burned her leather.
She hummed and pulled pins from her hair until the braid uncoiled to hang down her back. The streaks of silver looked like fine strands of precious metal woven throughout. “That alright?” Ed turned to face him and he hurriedly looked back down to the shift in his hands. It was drawn at the neck by a crimson ribbon fed through lace. It was a shame she never wore it. “Seems safe enough?” He heard the smirk in her voice.
“Yep,” he nodded, lips caught between his teeth. He gathered the shift in his hands and when he tried to place it over her head, he missed. He felt her guide him with a hand on his wrist. He thought it was safe to look. Her black shift was fine and gauzy. Her silhouette was clear through the fabric from the light of the window. When she reached behind her neck to guide her braid free, the action pulled the shift tight around the front of her body. He was dizzy.
Edward sat to pull her trousers on and she didn’t tuck her shift into them. He tried not to think about how she wore her trousers with nothing beneath or how a few buttons on her fall were the only things preserving her modesty. He helped her with her stays and she stepped into her boots. She didn’t seem pleased as she looked down. “Needs some work,” Ed shrugged and untied the crimson ribbon. She held fistfuls of her shift at her hips and pulled down, the neckline widening and shifting until it sat perfectly in line with the top of her stays. Her shoulders were entirely bare, and the eagle just beneath her clavicle was prominent. With every exhale, her tiny, rosy nipples fell away from her stays and into view. In a silk gown, she’d have been the envy of the most fashionable Parisians. In trousers, she was the fire in his blood. “Jim!” She called out suddenly, stepping through the curtain and leaving Stede alone and painfully hard. “Do you wanna hack at this for me?”
When stede caught his breath and joined them, Jim was sawing the excess length off Ed’s shift with her huge knife. They didn’t hurt her, but Stede nearly screamed at the possibility. “We have scissors!”
“This’ll look cooler,” she shrugged, her chest briefly bare above her stays. Jim nodded and finished their task with one final, sickening ripping sound. In an idle position, her skin was bare between the tabs. It looked as if she wasn’t wearing a shift at all.
“Hey captain?” Lucius began, his eyebrows high. “Maybe this one stays in the cabin? I mean, it looks good, just maybe like,” he puffed out his flushed cheeks and exhaled dramatically, “too good?”
Edward shrugged on her jacket, grinning. “Nah, fuck you, mate, I like it.” The cropped length of her jacket accentuated the waist of her stays and the lapels framed her chest enticingly. “Other option is naked.”
“Oh, that seems dangerous,” Stede said, wishing he could formulate a stronger argument against the idea. He simply didn’t have the will. Maybe he didn’t hate the idea of seeing her play out her role as Blackbeard, completely bare in the sunlight. Being just one of fifty to watch her might make him feel less guilty.
Jim shrugged, “better than having Roach try to pick thread out of a wound. Might freak ‘em out a bit, too, y’know. If we were all naked.”
“If we’re planning an orgy, let’s keep it separate from the raids, yeah?” Lucius suggested. “Oil’s a better lube than blood.”
“Maybe you weren’t using enough blood,” Ed said without missing a beat before snorting and covering her face.
Stede imagined Izzy might have laughed with Jim at that. “Oh, darling, that’s the perfect outfit for talking to Izzy.”
Lucius and Jim shared a look and Ed blushed. “I dunno, he hates it when I get slutty.” She waved him off and everyone fell into dubious silence. She noticed their doubt and shrank self-consciously. “Well, he’s always complaining about it.”
“He’s been looking at your tits, captain,” Lucius said boredly, head resting on his hand and wooden winger tapping on his cheek. “He wants to fuck you, but he’s just too weird about sex to admit it.”
Ed shook her head, getting ready to argue when a canon blast shook the Revenge. “That was our gun.”
“Damage the cargo and I’ll fucking kill you,” Izzy warned from the quarterdeck banister. The ship was as gilded as he’d expected when he heard of it. Ed rarely needed a perfect apology, or any apology at all, but she deserved one. The shot took out half a mast, but it still set enough sail to grow the distance between them. “Why aren’t those fucking sails down yet?!”
“Izzy, are we under attack?” Stede asked, running out into the deck and looking around frantically.
“No,” he answered through clenched teeth. He’d assumed the captains would keep each other occupied long enough, but Stede never did what was convenient for anyone else. Sometimes he hated living on the same ship as Ed. He could never surprise her with anything. She followed Stede out with Jimenez and Spriggs, already in her Blackbeard leather as if she knew. From above, Izzy could see right down the bowed front of her stays. He dug his nails into the wood. “Where’s your shift? Fuck, Ed, you’re practically…” he trailed off helplessly.
Ed’s expression was so innocent. “Right here, man,” she reached in to grab the lace neckline between two fingers, baring an entire breast to the sunlight in the process. “Whatchya up to?”, she asked sweetly.
Izzy swore and looked away. He took the steps down to the main deck two at a time, pushing past Stede. “Watch the crew and keep that fucking ship afloat,” he ordered, more to Jim than Stede. He could trust them to be competent. He stopped with his shoulder to Edward’s arm. He couldn’t look her in the eye. “We need to talk.”
“I agree,” she said readily and followed him back toward the cabin.
He couldn’t make it through the hall. He turned only to make direct eye contact with her intricately worked eagle tattoo mere inches from him. The sun had, in the past months, only seen a thin triangular patch of skin on her chest where her fichu crossed over. The lines of it were clear and it was painfully obvious how much more she was showing than usual. Her neckline cut obscenely low across her breasts. He clenched his first. “That staymaker’s a fucking pervert, there’s no way that’s the style.”
“It is.” She said, her voice level, and she would know. He found himself pouting impotently, unable to look at her. “Izzy, I,” Ed choked, “you know, right?” She asked, her expression pleading.
The cannons sounded again and he prayed they were being precise. “What?” He demanded. “What was I too fucking stupid to see, this time?”
Edward recoiled, her expression blank. He could see her waiting it out, the way she had Hornigold’s rage, and he hated that he was the cause. He sighed and rested his forehead in his hand. She waited. “I’m in love with you,” she said, quiet and regretful like a missed opportunity. “Really thought you knew.” Her voice was soft and wavering. It didn’t make sense. Edward had her pick of the sea- she had Stede . Anyone would pick Stede.
He struggled for words, but he didn’t even know where to start. The door opened, mr. Feeney leaning on the knob, “we’re boardin’ Captain.” Never mind that the order came from Izzy. He couldn’t be too angry, as long as Ed was shown the proper respect. He glanced between Ed and the open door.
She sighed and beckoned for Izzy to follow her back out. “Guess we’re working,” she shrugged.
Izzy gaped at the jagged slip of skin visible above her waistband as she passed. The black shift she wore had been cut short enough to tuck into her stays and it was only visible in the lacing gap behind her heavy braid. “Wait, are you-“
“I’m wearing this ,” she said, turning to walk backwards and hold open her jacket to display her chest, “or fuckin nothing. Cope.” She turned back and walked out into the deck where the light flooded around her. Left in the dark, he couldn’t see her.
He had to hurry to make it to the dinghy before they cast off. The ride was short but excruciating. Izzy sat on the edge of the boat, as he always did, to make room for Ed to stretch out her knee, and Stede reached up to elbow him. “What’s this ship you’ve found for us, Iz?” He wondered when Stede decided he had permission to use her nickname. “It’s very pretty.”
“You’ll see,” he ground out through clenched teeth. He wasn’t looking forward to a crew of lonely navy men’s reactions to the sight of Edward.
“It was meant to be a surprise,” Lucius snitched casually, “not sure how we were supposed to distract her through cannon fire…”
Izzy closed his eyes and counted, like the fucking good pirate rules suggested. It didn’t help. “The cannons were set off prematurely.” Several of Stede’s crew giggled. Izzy nudged his thigh with his boot, “fuckin disgraceful, letting children on your ship.”
“Our ship,” Stede corrected, condescendingly sweet as he patted Izzy’s knee. Izzy brushed his hand off.
The raid went about as bad as he expected. Ed insisted on playing out a whole scene and speech and she was terrifying, because she was talented, but the whole time, he couldn’t focus. Every time she raised her arms, her stays were nothing but a frame for her bare chest. Izzy threw a few more people overboard than necessary. Eventually, he was about to get her down into the cargo hold, the hatchway casting a lattice-work shadow over her. “I’ve been hearing about this ship for a month,” he explained when she looked at him expectantly. “Couldn’t believe it when I spotted it.” He found a pry bar and wedged it under the lid of a massive crate. “Listen, Edward,” he sighed, trying to steady himself with his forehead against the crate . “I don’t know if I can say it. But me too, alright?” He glanced back, and her eyes were wide enough that he could hope she understood. “For decades, really,” he wrenched the bar and warped the lid. “Anyway, I felt like a dick,” he moved on hurriedly, “and apparently some princess or duchess or whatever’s sending half her wardrobe across the sea.” He chose a new spot to pull the nails free. “Every pirate’s likely after it, so I didn’t except much luck, but,” this time, the lid popped open. He heard her gasp before he saw the contents. Fine silk lined the inside, folded carefully over royal ensembles and sprinkled with rose petals to keep the fabric fresh from the smell of the sea.
“No fucking way,” her hands wrapped around his forearm and she grinned excitedly. “Close it- close it- holy shit I can’t even look at it right now,” she waved her hand frantically and he pulled the lid back in place. He found himself wedged between her and the crate, and her eyes were dark. “Can I please kiss you?” She asked, turning the world upside-down, and he had to recover quickly because of he didn’t- “I understand if you don’t want to, like, fuck, I shouldn’t have even-“
He forced himself to remember how to move so that he could grab her waist and cup her cheek. “Shut up,” he growled and stood on his toes and it might have seemed very confident and smooth if he was tall enough to close the fucking gap. She took pity on him, with a grin, and leaned down to him.
Izzy hadn’t planned that far ahead. He just needed her to stop pouting, he hadn’t prepared himself for how it would feel. He didn’t think he could have. Her lips were soft past her mustache and her hands were in his hair. He was sure he was clumsy. She must have found him painfully boring and inexperienced compared to everyone else she’d kissed. He wasn’t actually sure he’d moved since the kiss began, stunned as he was. He tried to imagine some way to reciprocate, but all he could think was how impossible the situation was. He wasn’t the kind of person who should be kissed softly in the dim filtered sunlight. But she was. He tilted his chin up into the kiss, pulling her closer with the hand at her waist and shifting the other down her neck to her clavicle. She whined as if he’d done something exciting. Izzy had to pull away. Edward was overwhelming without touching him- without cradling his head and kissing him. He held on to her jacket with shaking hands, head hanging by her panting chest and he had to squeeze his eyes shut. She hesitantly ran her hand through his hair, “hey buddy… you doin’ alright?”
“I need a minute,” he rasped and she stepped away, slipping from his hands and leaving him cold without her contact. He forced himself not to reach after her. He hadn’t cried in decades, not really. He’d certainly gotten closer to it than he’d like several times since meeting Stede, but he could always stop it in time. In the gilded cargo hold, tears ran down his face in thick streams, splashing dramatically to the floor. She made a distressed, helpless sound in the back of her throat and gripped her stays anxiously. Izzy covered his mouth. Even with the phantom pressure of her lips, he couldn’t believe it happened. He’d been comfortable never acknowledging why he’d devoted his life to her. Even in his mind, he couldn’t admit to it.
He didn’t even really think it existed- what he couldn’t admit to. Nobody had anything good to say about marriage. The world was full of people who thought they’d felt something ‘fuzzy’ or whatever, only to end up trapped for life in a shit legal contract with ten snotty fucking children and the ghoul they made them with. But Izzy had already given her decades and she was, in her newfound happiness, more radiant than she’d ever been. Everything about her that drew him to her on Hornigold’s ship had been nourished on the Revenge. She was brilliant and lovely and silly. Izzy always thought he hated silly but he-
He fucking loved her.
Izzy heaved in a breath, having lost it since the first tears fell, and he laughed on what air he could gather. “Iz?” She asked, sounding scared.
He shook his head, holding up a hand and wiping his face with the other. “Holy shit,” he laughed again and he couldn’t dry his face in the long cuff of his sleeve when the tears hadn’t stopped. Edward held her arms open to him, her head tilted and brows pulled tightly together. “What the fuck are-“ he could hear her voice in his head, playfully stern as she recited Good Pirate Rule number thirteen, ‘stop being a dick when people offer affection. Just say no thank you.’ She’d scold. “Fuck it, yes please,” he stepped into her arms. He could feel his own pulse. His head was tucked under her beard, his cheek pressed to her bare skin. It was hard to breathe again. Her heartbeat nearly kept pace with his. He drew her in as close as possible, clinging to the lacing at her back.
Moving Izzy’s gift to the Revenge was a pain in the ass. They had to bathe when they got back to the cabin that night and she insisted she wanted the last turn. She switched her boots for slippers, helped Izzy light the candles and made sure Stede had everything he needed in the en-suite. He kissed her and she kissed back before returning to Izzy with a guilty weight in her chest. He nodded in greeting from the couch. She sat with him, careful to leave as much room between them as possible. He held a candle in his hand and played with the flame. She watched him, afraid to say anything. The discomfort of silence grew worse than the threat of ruining something. “Thank you, Iz. It’s all so beautiful.” She tried, and he didn’t answer. “Sure hope that princess or duchess or whatever doesn’t miss her clothes too much.” She laughed weakly
“They should be yours,” he said firmly.
Ed tried to say something but it came out as a squeak. She didn’t even know what it was going to be. “I love you,” she said, because it was true and he was wonderful and since she’d said it once, she couldn’t stop. “You don’t have to-“
“You fucking idiot,” he interrupted with a scowl, pointing the candle at her, “there’s not a person in this world who could know you without loving you.” He looked away shyly to glare at the floor. His knuckles were pale around the candle. She leaned forward to blow it out. A warm glow surrounded them, and between them was shadow. She took his free hand, in the dark. He didn’t pull away. “Does Stede know?”
The guilt was back, stronger than before. “Not that we kissed. But he knows how I feel. I…” she choked and forced herself through it, “Izzy, I love him, too.” She held her breath.
“Hm,” he hummed with a little bounce. “Thought so. That makes more sense.” He grumbled.
Ed laughed, “more sense than loving you?” She wrapped her arm around his head and pulled him playfully into her chest, “my best friend? One of my favorite men?” She hurried her fingers in his hair and ruffled it. “Who’s the fucking idiot?”
Izzy was rigid in her arms, his grip tight on the elegantly carved frame of the couch behind her. “Edward,” she always loved his voice and how he said her name. His beard scratched at her sternum and his breath ran down her shift. “You’re doing this on purpose,” he accused.
She hummed and rested her cheek on his head, “what am I doing, baby?”
The furniture creaked in his grip. “You’re evil.”
“You like that in a captain,” she teased as she let him go. He pulled away, still framing her in his arms, his cheeks red. He was so careful not to touch her, and his expression was soft. There were tears in his eyes again. “Hey, did I fuck something up?” She asked softly.
He scoffed and shook his head, trying to dry his eyes by rolling them. “No, ‘s stupid.” He sat back on his end of the couch and she tilted her head. “Don’t make me say it, you know-“ she shrugged and he growled, “I’m happy .” He groaned and pressed his sleeve to his eye. “Fucking humiliating.”
She moved closer and he didn’t protest. “It’s embarrassing to be happy?”
“To fucking cry about it, yeah.” He put his hand down and she laid on her side to rest her head on his thigh. He let her.
Ed flicked her nail idly over the edge of his boot. “I’ve happy-cried. Stede does it all the time.” She rolled onto her back to look at him, her head coming to rest against his hip. He unclenched a fist, apparently by force, and rested his palm rigidly on her head. “Iz,” she sang and he raised an eyebrow in question, “I wanna kiss again.” She whined dramatically and reached up to pull at his blouse. The goal, of course, was to be as annoying as possible. She thought it was funny.
He huffed, but really it was a laugh. There was a slight curve to the corner of his lip and her heart fluttered at the sight of it. “Stede’s in the bath,” he tilted his head in the direction of the en-suite.
“And you’re right here.” Her go-to move at this stage of flirting was to grab cock. She put her hands under her back. “And you’re so handsome.”
Izzy sighed and rolled his eyes theatrically, but his amusement was clear. “Alright, fine, come here.”
“You just wanna shut me up,” she accused as she shot up eagerly and turned to face him.
“Yeah,” he smiled, fully and truly, and leaned in to kiss her. She loved being kissed. Even if she had to beg for it, it made her feel wanted. It took a lot of willpower not to climb into his lap or start pulling off her clothes. Behind her closed eyes, as they kissed, she imagined his smile.
He jumped back to his side of the couch when the door by the bed opened. “Oh, good,” Stede grinned as he dried out his hair with quick, short movements, one eye squeezed closed. In his wrapping gown, he looked like a golden dog scratching his ear. “Izzy, I filled the tub for you,” he told him as he perched on the armrest behind Ed to play with her hair.
Izzy gaped at Stede with the same expression he wore when Ed told him she loved him, his cheeks even more flushed. “Why the fuck would you do that?” She knew he wanted to growl and hiss, but his voice was soft and awed.
Stede wrapped her braid up and pinned it in place, “cause I wanted to? I thought it might make it easier for you, and after what you’ve done for Edward, you certainly deserve it.”
“He draws the best baths,” Ed hummed, leaning into Stede’s hands. Izzy’s eyes watered. The first time that happened in front of Stede, he lashed out and everything was tense for a week. “You don’t wanna let it get cold,” she urged gently, slipping off a mule to nudge him with her stockinged foot. He shot her a thankful look and hurried to the en-suite. She and Stede watched him go, Stede wrapping his arms around her. “If you keep that up,” she warned, “he’s going to fall in love with you.”
“Good,” he said cheerily. Edward had been bitten on the ear before, maybe three or five times. Not the same ear. A lot of people made wild decisions in a drunken scrap. She’d never been kissed there, before Stede ran his hands up her stays and under her jacket and his lips made ghostly contact with the shell of her ear. She loved the short beard he’d cultivated, and the neatly curled mustache that tickled her skin. “Really good raid today,” he ran his fingers over the cords of her stays, “looked like you actually had fun.”
“I did,” she pushed a lapel aside to make room for his hands and he slipped the jacket off her shoulders. She had been worried that she’d never find herself in Blackbeard again. “Just had to make Blackbeard be me.”
Stede kissed her neck just above the cravat she’d never give back and she could feel his smile. She bit her lip. “That was you out there, wasn’t it? You’re so cute when you’re all scary.” He laughed, his fingertips tracing the upper edge of her stays, careful not to touch her nipples, but still coming maddeningly close. His hands were warm and rougher than they used to be. She turned around and dragged him in for a kiss. He hummed excitedly and she leaned back with her fists tight in his nightgown. He knelt between her legs to follow her down and she closed her knees around his hips. He propped himself up on an elbow, and she could feel the presence of his free hand through the boning of her stays. He abandoned the kiss in favor of trailing his nose down her neck and she couldn’t complain. His breath made her shiver and she had to let her thighs fall apart from each other to make room for him. She tilted her head and grazed her nails over his scalp gently. “I love you so much,” he whispered against her skin. He kissed down her chest as she tried to process the overwhelming joy. When his tongue swiped across her exposed nipple, she gasped and her back arched into the touch. He looked up at her curiously before he grinned. “Oh, you make noises?” He asked excitedly. “You’re so quiet when we kiss.”
She covered her face with both her hands. “I hold back. Old habit.”
Stede giggled, his breath ghosting over her bared chest, and cooed, “hello.” His fingertips drew quick, feather-light circles around her nipples. She held her breath. “We’ll break that habit eventually,” he promised. “In fact, I’d like to propose a new Good Pirate Rule,” he added conversationally as he nudged a nipple downward to watch it bounce back into place. She hummed, hoping to sound casually interested. It just sounded like a poorly hidden moan. “Stop hiding your blush,” he commanded, and she didn’t know he could sound like that. It would have been a great captain voice, if it weren’t too hot to use aboveboard. “And let me hear you.”
She forced her hands away from her face and tried to grab his blouse again but he guided her arms back up. His lovely, wide-set eyes gazed over her with something close to obsession. She couldn’t believe her luck, that he would say she was beautiful and mean it. She thought she knew what it looked like when she was wanted. It seemed like anyone wanted her if they were horny enough. She realized, as she saw something familiar in the heat of his eyes, that she had been craved , and for far longer than she could know.
When she was a kid, properly a kid, before Hornigold, she would watch storms through the shuddered windows. She saw the majesty of the sea those nights, felt it in her bones as thunder cracked in drawn-out, reverberating cacophony. It never scared her, and maybe it should have humbled her. When the sky flashed white and the choppy sea was illuminated for a chaotic instant, she saw divinity. Beneath Stede, she was the witness and the storm. She wondered, as her eyes stang and her throat grew tight, if that’s what Izzy felt with her. She hoped so.
“Shit, oh no, I’m sorry,” Stede scrambled off the couch. He looked concerned enough to start crying himself. His hands shook and he reached for her but stopped himself. “Am I going too fast?” His flush faded and she really didn’t like the look of dread on his sweet face, “did I misread this entirely?”
She sat up and shook her head frantically. He was practically a virgin, despite the portraits of two children on the mantle, and he was going to be traumatized just because Ed couldn’t handle a bit of world-shaking emotion. She took his hands gently. “Baby, no,” she soothed and he swallowed, eyes wide and cheeks scarlet. “I just didn’t know you, like… well I mean, I knew you loved me, but I didn’t know you-“ She swallowed but her throat was dry. She couldn’t look at him and her tears were soaking into her beard. “ Wanted me.” Maybe she shouldn’t have made fun of Izzy. The explanation sounded stupid in her ears.
Stede’s eyebrows shot up and then furrowed. “You didn’t know?” He fell in the seat next to her, stacked their joined hands on her knee, and stared into the unlit fireplace, shaking his head. “I was trying to hide it,” he admitted with a shocked laugh, looking to Ed for her reaction and she mirrored his uneasy smile. “I thought you weren’t interested.” She frowned and he held up his hands, his blush spreading across what she could see of his chest, “hey, the way you look at me makes me feel genuinely handsome, I’ve never…” he shook his head, “I mean sex in general. It didn’t seem like something you wanted.”
She choked and felt like she had to rearrange her mind to understand what he said and accept it as reality. “I’m a slut,” she insisted, a bit offended.
Stede shrugged, cringing like he thought he was in trouble. She carefully unfurrowed her brow. Blackbeard wasn’t invited. “I know you’ve been with plenty of men, but the way you talk about it, it’s never seemed to me like you really… enjoyed it?”
Ed huffed and leaned back against the couch like she’d been pushed. She remembered countless nights and mornings shuffling back to her quarters, feeling alone and deeply unsatisfied. Not herself. It got worse when she stopped sleeping with Izzy- when she had to retreat to an empty room. The men she fucked weren’t gentle or loyal and they certainly didn’t love her. They let her play at womanhood when it aroused them and punished her for it when it didn’t. They never treated her, genuinely, like she was anything other than a man, just feminine enough to get away with fucking. “Oh… I don’t think I did, either.”
“And that’s okay,” He assured, squeezing her hands softly. “I don’t need-“
“I didn’t like fucking those guys,” she specified and his lips formed a small circle. “And I only know that because you two are so much better.”
His eyes were bright with joy and he sat up straight. That golden dog she’d seen in him earlier would have wagged his tail. “Oh!” He sighed and grinned, “I feel the same! No offense to Mary, of course,” he amended and Ed nodded. She’d never met Mary, but she wanted to. If Stede did have feelings for Mary, there was room in Ed’s heart, even if there wasn’t room in the cabin. “But there’s something here,” he gestured between the two of them, and then included the en-suit, “that was missing in my marriage.
Edward bounced in her seat, her excited hands struggling in Stede’s. “Holy shit are you gonna kiss him? Fuck, I hope so. Or he can kiss you, I’m not picky.”
Stede laughed and covered his face but she shook her head and moved his hand away. He groaned, “that’s not an official rule yet. We haven’t voted it in.”
She grabbed his head and pulled him close. “You proposed it,” she kissed his cheek and it was shockingly warm against her lips. “And I immediately followed,” his nose felt cold in comparison. “I think it’s only fair,” she purred in his ear and smiled against his neck. She felt him squirm in her arms. “So be a good boy, hmm?”
Izzy pushed the door open and stared at them for a long, uncomfortable moment. She really should have made sure everybody was on the same page. Unfortunately, kissing them both was too fun and having the necessary conversations had been proving too painful or awkward to bear. “Hi,” Stede waved apprehensively. “Good bath?”
Izzy rolled his eyes, but she could see his blush from across the room. “Fuck does that mean?” He dropped his armful of leather on a table and gathered oils, a horsehair brush, and a rag. He’d insisted that he didn’t need all that when Stede gave it to him, and it had been a pain in the ass to get him to accept sets of night clothes. Stede liked to pamper him and Ed loved to see it. He’d never wear a wrapping gown, but he looked nice in fine black linen.
“Your turn, darling,” Stede patted her hip and pulled himself up to stand. She looked to Izzy as they went to the en-suit and he ignored them. Stede helped her heat water and unlaced her stays for her.
She still had her slippers on, and she didn’t like to risk getting the red leather wet. She followed Stede back out to leave them tucked against the wall and she leaned toward him to whisper, “I’m about to fuck you over just a bit, but I promise it’s for the best.”
“Hm?” He turned to her, confused, and stress took over his expression as he registered what she said. “Fuck me over? What are you going to do?”
“Don’t worry about it,” she smiled and lifted her head, “ Izzy, baby?” She slid into the hall to the en-suit and held the doorknob and he looked up from tending to his leather with wide eyes and red cheeks, “Stede thought he was dating both of us for months.” She pulled the door shut as quickly as possible.
Ed had forgotten to grab herself a nightgown. It was usually her first step in preparing to bathe, but Stede had ushered her in and it slipped her mind. Bathing alone was boring, so she rushed through it and found herself with nothing but the rags cut from Stede’s grayed blouses, leather trousers, and her cropped shift to wear. At least the rags were clean. She wrapped one around herself beneath her arms and it barely reached out her hips. In the time it took her to walk to gather her clothes, she convinced herself that she needed to apologize. If her bare shoulders pissed Izzy off, she couldn’t imagine he’d be happy with wet, white linen. She remembered how she’d stirred the pot on her way out and the blood drained from her face. She really needed to apologize. She tucked her clothes under her arm, took her lit candle in a brass holder, and stepped out into the hall. She found a pile of fabric folded on the seat against the wall, dusted in the same rose petals from the royal wardrobe. She set the candle down on a bookshelf. She didn’t recognize the nightgown and as she lifted it, she felt the unimaginable quality. She didn’t know linen could be so soft. It was densely woven, but with fibers so fine that the light of the tiny flame bled through. She dropped her leather to the floor, dried herself off, and pulled the nightgown over her head. She moaned, and she was glad she was alone. Despite clearly utilizing upwards of five yards, the gown was light as air. “Fuck off,” she whispered reverently, watching the candle shine through the lace on the ruffled cuffs. The hem, flounced and impossibly full, brushed her ankles. There was silk on the chair, the pattern so intricate and varied that at first, she thought it was a tapestry. It depicted deer and birds, scenes of garden parties and lovers, flowers and palaces. When she considered the time taken to spin and dye the thread, to design the images and translate them to weaving and embroidery, her head span. She carefully lifted it and long, perfect pleats fell down the length of it. She hadn’t known women’s wrapping gowns were so full. She turned it to locate the sleeves and saw the pearlescent sheen on the lining. The warp threads were pink and the weft blue, so the angle of viewing changed its color. She had to sit down. As her fingers traced the edge of the lining, she imagined her mother knelt in front of her. “Feel it,” Ed wanted to tell her, and guide her lye-worn hands to the silk, “it’s meant for us.”
Eventually, she was able to bring herself to put it on. Her hands were unsteady as she slipped into it. The skirt of the wrapping gown was full from the pleated back and the sleeves were turned out at the cuff to show the lining. The hem brushed the floorboards, and judging by the wide strip of linen that ran along it, it was meant to drag. She didn’t mind that she was too tall for her nightgown to touch the floor. She preferred the practicality of a working class hem-length. She gathered her Blackbeard clothes and her candle and peeked into the cabin.
Every lamp and candle holder they owned seemed to be lit. One of the couches- the one Stede had chosen- was missing. She opened the door further and found it, shoved up against the bed where it lined up perfectly to extend the surface. The curtains were drawn closed but held open at the bottom by the furniture, creating lovely drapery that protected the alcove. Her heart fluttered at the sight but it didn’t compare to the feeling that struck her when she saw Izzy and Stede.
Izzy looked so small in Stede’s lap, his narrow hips held tightly in broad hands. They moaned and hummed into their kiss, Izzy grabbing at Stede’s hair and nightgown. She slumped against the wall, gripping the door for support. They were beautiful in the flickering golden light. Izzy leaned back, his shoulders rising and falling with the force of his breath. Stede laughed with empty lungs and admired Izzy’s face, looking proud of himself. She loved his wild eyes. He tilted his head when he saw her, “oh, gorgeous,” he breathed.
“Shut up,” Izzy grumbled, pushing his forehead against Stede’s chest hard enough to shift him.
Stede laughed and petted Izzy’s hair, “you too,” he assured, amusement clear in his voice. She smiled into the cuff of her nightgown. “But I was talking about her .”
Izzy whipped around to look at her, curiously at first, but when he saw her, his jaw fell slack. She wanted a painting of them in that moment, tangled together and staring at her with awe and love. “Fuck off,” Izzy whispered to himself, shifting out of Stede’s lap to face her fully. His blouse was unbuttoned and untucked and Ed imagined Stede’s hands had wandered. She wanted to run to them, but she couldn’t remember how to move.
Stede freed himself from where he was pinned by Izzy’s knees on his nightgown and left him with a pat on the shoulder. He crossed the room to her and took her hand. “It’s so much lovelier when you wear it,” he told her as he traced a peony on her sleeve. He smiled at her and, overwhelmed, she kissed him. He cradled the back of her head and she wrapped her arms around his neck. Stede’s other hand rested on the small of her back, and he nudged her closer. She pressed her body against his, moaning at the feeling of his broad, solid chest and his half hard cock through a luxurious amount of gathered linen. She had to pull away to giggle excitedly, kissing Stede’s cheeks and forehead. Izzy watched them, leaning on Stede’s couch and gripping it tightly with both hands. There was a hunger in his eyes, but he looked away like he’d been caught.
Edward slipped her arms down to pat Stede’s chest, tilting her head and glancing between him and Izzy pointedly. She kissed him briefly and slipped away, beckoning him to follow her to Izzy’s side. She leaned her hip on the couch and her shoulder on Izzy’s. He was so cute with his grumpy face flushed and his pajamas disheveled. “Hey,” she said softly, struck with concern, “are you alright with all this?” She guided a fallen lock of his hair back into place with a curled finger. Izzy’s brow furrowed and he pulled her down to kiss her. He was insistent, but he wasn’t forceful. When Ed turned towards him to make it easier, she found him to be just as hard as Stede. He gasped and she whined, pressing her hips to his. Instead of focusing on Izzy with her like she’d expected, Stede tucked himself behind Ed and kissed her neck. She leaned back on his chest, dragging Izzy with her. She had very little room to move, but when she arched her spine, Stede let out a strangled moan. She went to grab Izzy’s hips but Stede had beaten her to it and he yanked Izzy closer and pinned Ed between them. Izzy suppressed a moan against her lips and she tried to arch into either of them, but she couldn’t move enough. “Fuck,” Ed breathed, tilting her head back onto Stede’s shoulder. “I love you so much,” she reached for them both to be sure they understood, clinging to their linen. She should have been embarrassed by how easily they unraveled her, she was too happy.
The ship tilted, sending the three of them over the back of the couch to land on the extended bed. Ed laughed, her feet still dangling over the back rest. Stede giggled into her neck, but Izzy struggled to get up. When Stede whined and grabbed his blouse, Izzy swatted him away. “The fucking candles,” he reminded them urgently with a glare in Stede’s direction. He sprang up, Ed scrambled over the couch, and they hurried around the room, righting fallen candles and blowing out anything that wasn’t securely held in a sconce. Ed couldn’t see them as well, their expressions weren’t as clear. She mourned the light. “Stop fucking pouting,” Izzy told Stede as he made his way back to the bed with folded arms. “It was nice while it lasted.”
“I wanted your first time to be special,” Stede said sadly, putting his elbows on the back of the couch and resting his head on his hands.
Ed wasn’t close enough to see Izzy’s blush darken, but his shoulders raised up around his ears. “Shut the fuck up,” he hissed conspiratorially, glancing at Ed.
“Aww, I already knew you were a virgin, Iz,” she cooed and she knew he hated it, but he was too cute. She was able to resist ruffling his hair.
“It’s your first time, too,” Stede reminded her and she choked, wondering if she’d imagined their earlier disagreement. “As yourself. And it’s my first time in love.” He frowned and sat on his feet, appearing to shrink out of sight until only his golden curls showed. “Kinda hoped it would be perfect.”
Izzy snorted and she glared at him before sitting next to Stede, her hand on his ankle with what she hoped was a soothing touch. She tried to think of something good to say, about how anything with them was perfect, but Izzy spoke first. “That’s stupid.” She gaped at him. He walked to Stede’s other side and leaned over him, a fist in his hair. “Perfect’s fucking boring.”
Stede lunged and pulled him in, causing him to lose his balance and they both fell. The momentum had pushed Stede’s back into Ed’s lap, and they kissed fiercely. She held them and watched intently, cataloguing the movement of their jaws beneath their beards. They were clumsy, their teeth clicking together more than once, but their enthusiasm made up for it. She was sure Stede could feel how much she enjoyed it, and she wondered if he exaggerated his moans. Even when Stede accidentally elbowed her, she couldn’t believe how much better they were than the well-practiced people she’d followed to bed before. They’d all been acting in self-interest or performing, and it was never about anything more than getting off as fast as possible. She’d always settled for passing interest in her body. She had no idea love had been an option- that somebody might adore her buddy and care deeply about her experience. Even as she adored and cared about other people. She just never thought it was made for her. Like silk.
Stede couldn’t easily reach her, but Izzy reached above his head to lay a flat palm against her ribs. His hand was warm through her nightgown. She slipped her hands over Stede’s shoulders to work open the thread-wrapped buttons at his collar. Izzy’s free hand met hers where she parted the linen and felt Stede’s bare chest. Stede arched into their touch and she let her fingertips trail close to his nipples. Izzy pulled away, keeping Stede down with the hand on his chest as he strained his neck up to kiss her instead. He was gentler with her, careful with his teeth and slower with his movements. Stede giggled uncontrollably beneath them. “Oh, you’re so pretty. This is nice. I love your hair,” He babbled. She let her tongue graze Izzy’s lip at the same time she brushed her thumb over Stede’s nipple. When Stede yelped, she jumped back, her hands up. Izzy looked dazed. “My chest hair!” He indignantly swatted at Izzy’s clenched fist on his chest. Izzy let go and Ed brought his hand to her shoulder. She gently rubbed Stede’s chest, hoping to soothe him.
“Sorry,” Izzy muttered, not even begrudgingly.
Stede smiled, touched, “oh, thank you, dear, it’s alright,” he reached up to cup his cheek tenderly. She worried he might reject the soft treatment, but he seemed to lean in, his brows still furrowed. “Certainly felt better than when you stabbed me,” he joked lovingly.
Izzy rolled his eyes but he was clearly charmed. “If you want me to stab you again, just ask,” he suggested, shifting himself where he straddled Stede and making him groan.
“I guess consensual violence would be a step up,” Ed shrugged and continued groping at Stede’s chest. His eyes fell closed and he bit his lip. His nipples were hard and his breath hitched every time she made contact with them. “Stede,” She purred when she noticed his idle hands at his side. He didn’t open his eyes. “Stede,” She repeated, pinching his nipple briefly and gently. He gasped and looked up at her. “Why aren’t you touching him?” She asked patiently. He laughed and his hands disappeared up Izzy’s blouse. “Good boy.” She praised and he moaned. She shared a look with Izzy, their eyebrows raised, and she grinned. Good to know. They had so much in common.
Ed probably shouldn’t have let herself sit like that for so long, on her feet with her legs folded, the weight of two pirates of varied size on her thighs. It couldn’t have been good for her knee. Izzy noticed her pain before she did, ever the vigilant expert in reading her. “Move,” he commanded and hopped off Stede’s lap. If Stede felt anything similar to what Ed felt, his mind was likely cloudy, but Izzy was impatient. “You’re on her fucking leg, move.”
Stede sprang up with one of his cute ‘distressed rich boy’ sounds, “oh, fuck.” He twisted around, his expression concerned. “I’m so sorry, I can’t believe I forgot. Are you alright?”
“It’s not that big a deal,” she pulled her feet out from under herself and stretched her legs out stiffly. “Oof,” the worst of it was the unpleasant tingling from restricting her blood. She rearranged the volume of her nightgown around herself and smoothed out her silk. Neither of them said anything and when she looked up, they wore grim expressions. “Seriously. It’s fixed,” she assured Stede before pointing sternly at Izzy, “don’t be a dick, you pulled his chest hair.” They pouted. She sighed and flopped down onto her side, momentarily losing her arm between the bed and the couch. “Come here,” she whined petulantly. “So fucking dramatic.”
Stede shook his head, “no, you lay in the middle,” he looked to Izzy for backup, “we had it all planned.”
“Can’t fuckin plan around Ed,” Izzy reminded him, “does what she wants.” He put an arm over the backrest and Ed nodded. Stede folded his arms and glared at Izzy.
Edward laughed, “what, are you gonna fight if I’m not between you?” Once she heard herself, she groaned and let her face fall into the bed covers. “Yeah, alright, that’s a good idea,” she admitted, making a show of how much effort it took to roll over, her legs knocking into Stede. Her dick was pinned under her hips and she buried her moan in her arms. She felt Stede twist where he sat to trail his fingers along her calf under the hem of her wrapping gown. He brushed the fabric aside, moving up the back of her knee and onto her thigh. She looked back to grin at him as she shuddered. She wanted to pull her gowns up to her waist and tilt her ass in the air, but it was so much nicer to have them undress her, if they wanted. More than half way up her thigh, he laid his palm flat and grabbed a gentle handful of soft muscle. She lifted her hips to lean into the touch. “Stede, please,” she begged.
He stopped, leaning back with an intrigued expression. “I’m sorry, Ed,” he said innocently, “please, what?” She hid her face back in her arms and whined. “We don’t know what you want, we need you to say it. Very specifically,” he prompted with barely concealed laughter. She mumbled into her arms. “Hmm? I’m so sorry, beautiful, I didn’t hear that. Did you Izzy?”
“Didn’t hear shit,” Izzy aged wickedly. They didn’t touch her at all as they waited and she squirmed impatiently.
She lifted her head and repeated, “I wouldn’t last long enough for you to fuck me,” clear enough to be heard, her cheeks burning. They swore under their breath. “Please fucking touch me,” she begged and Stede’s hands returned immediately to her thigh. Izzy watched closely and leaned forward to pinch her gowns and inch them higher up her legs. “Izzy,” he froze and she nodded. He slipped a hand under her gowns and flipped the mass of fabric upwards where it pooled around her waist. She heard them whispering and strained until she could see them huddled together and staring at her ass with hands over their mouths and tears in their eyes. “Very funny,” she said flatly, watching them pretend to have some sort of religious experience, but they didn’t drop the bit.
“Damn, it’s a shame you can’t see this,” Stede told her breathlessly, his hand sliding up her thigh and stopping just beneath her ass. His thumb rubbed side-to-side, slipping between her thighs once every second. She had very little control over her hips lifting. “Izzy could you-“ she felt two hands grab her hips and push her back down to the bed, “thank you dear, now be sure to watch.” He shook his handful of her thigh and she felt her ass jiggle. “Amazing,” he breathed, grabbing her other thigh and shaking them together. “Edward, you have such a cute butt!”, he told her and she laughed into her arms. She was amazed she wasn’t humping the bed. It was a testament to her self-control and she thought she deserved some praise for it. She was sure if their hands were any warmer, they’d have burned. “Really, every bit of you is adorable,” he let go of a thigh to rest his hand between Izzy’s, at the base of her spine. “Darling, I know you just put them on,” he lifted a finger to bounce the ruffled hem of her nightgown, “but-“
Ed tried to flip over and sit up, but Izzy wouldn’t budge. She nodded, straining to see them over her shoulder, “fuck, yeah, let me take them off.” They let go and left her cold where they had touched her and she hated it. Turning over, she was careful not to sit on her skirts. The silk tapestry wrapping gown slipped off one of her shoulders. She was painfully hard under the linen gathered in her lap.
Izzy patted her calf irritably until she extended her legs in front of herself. Once she did, he gripped her thigh and whispered an experimental, “good girl,” that made her audibly moan. Izzy and Stede shared a familiar expression. He took her silk and handed it to Stede, who folded it neatly. She kissed him, putting both hands up his blouse and feeling scars she could remember sewing shut. His fists were tight in her nightgown. She climbed into his lap, straddling him with her skirt piled on his legs. When he grabbed her hips and tugged her close, only his trousers separated them and she moaned at the heat she felt through linen. She rocked her hips into his, her eyes falling shut. “Fuck,” he choked. “Fuck, you’re hot,” he praised and she hid her smile against the crown of his head. He let go of her, reaching past her with their chests pressed together to grab Stede by his nightgown. “Get the fuck over here,” he growled. Stede laughed and slotted himself behind Ed. She was pinned between their chests again and she giggled happily.
“Arms up, darling,” Stede said and Ed hummed as she tried to process it. With two handfuls of her gown, he pulled it up and over her head. She was entirely naked between them and Stede’s hands wandered hungrily. She arched her back and rolled her hips into them both. “Touch her,” Stede urged, “she likes it,” he ran his fingertips over her nipple and she strained against their hold. Her thighs were tight around Izzy’s hips and he slipped a hand between her and Stede to grab a handful of her ass. They were both as hard as she was and they touched her so eagerly. She couldn’t help but grind against Izzy’s stomach and she hoped he didn’t mind. When she noticed Stede tugging at Izzy’s blouse, she was happy to help, and together they were able to get it off of him. Stede pulled him close and she savored the contact with his skin, hugging him to her chest. Every movement of her hips dragged a moan from all three of them. “Fuck, Ed, wait,” Stede groaned and forced himself away with great effort. His breath was ragged and he was concerningly red. “I won’t last,” he admitted and she couldn’t hide her sigh of relief. She’d been worried she would embarrass herself and cum before anyone really touched her.
There was enough room for her to be able to shift around in Izzy’s lap until she faced Stede. He was having trouble bringing his gaze up to her eyes, but she really didn’t mind. “Good,” she ruffled his nightgown around and found that it wasn’t stuck beneath him, “let me take this off?” He nodded eagerly and she leaned forward in Izzy’s lap, making sure to wiggle her hips for him. She’d seen Stede’s dick a hundred times before while they dressed, mostly soft and adorable. She really liked the look of a limp cock and the image she kept in her mind of his would have been the perfect masturbatiory aid, if she ever had the privacy. She’d never seen him so flushed. The sight distracted her from her task and Stede helpfully took over, tossing his nightgown to the floor. Grinning and falling back against Izzy’s chest, she admired him with a fingernail between her teeth. “Izzy, I’m fuckin losing it,” she told him, hoping he’d share his thoughts, but Izzy just grunted, resting his forehead on her shoulder and controlling his breath. She should have remembered he was likely to get overwhelmed. “Iz?” She rested her hand on his leg.
“I can’t…” he scoffed, frustrated with himself and embarrassed, “can’t fuckin wrap my head around it.” His hands hesitated over her thighs, “Edward, I trained myself not to touch you,” he huffed, “and you’re fucking naked.”
Stede closed his legs and she placed her hand strategically on her lap. “‘S that alright?” She asked, and her voice came out more anxious than she’d have liked.
Izzy grabbed her wrist, “fucks sake, what do I have to admit to make you believe I’m not looking for a way out of this? I’m just,” he groaned, “I’m fucking nervous, alright? And neither of you are acting like this is any fucking different from eating breakfast-“
“Okay, fucking time out,” Ed and Stede detangled themselves and they sat in a circle. Ed reached for their wrapping gowns, passing over the yellow one and Stede put it on. “Of course I’m nervous, Iz, you’re my best friends,” she slipped into her wrapping gown and held it closed around herself.
Stede held out his hand, palm down, “Izzy, look. I’m shaking.”
Izzy rested his chin on his knees with furrowed brows, “it’s like you’re following a script I’ve never read. How do you know where to touch and when?” His fists were tight and he didn’t look at them.
“Well, for her, I’m sure it’s experience,” Stede gestured to her and she nodded, “but I’m just uh, trying to have fun? Sometimes it’s impulsive, sometimes I try to think about how you two might like being touched. I figure, I know what feels good on me, and it can’t be too different. Do you ever… experiment with that?”
He blinked, “are you asking about my wank habits- are there no fucking boundaries?”
Ed snorted and looked around the room they all shared, “course not, that’s why I haven’t gotten a long enough moment alone in months,” she made a crude motion with her fingers in a circle and plenty of wrist movement. Izzy glanced down as if he could see through her gown. “Not a single hand on my cock all night and I’m still shocked I’ve made it this long.”
“Fuck, Ed, it’s that ,” he gestured at her, “so fucking casual, like this is normal, like I fucking missed something.”
“I-“ She choked, “I’m just… comfortable, I guess. I trust you two more than anyone. Like, yeah, I kinda can’t believe this is happening, but I’m happy it is.” Stede smiled and put his hand on hers. “Feels like maybe we wasted a lot of time, though.”
Stede shook his head, “I think it needed to happen this way. Better late than never, Hm?”
Izzy glared at the wall, his fingers digging into his folded arms. Ed took one hand and Stede took the other. “Is there a plan, or a goal, or fucking rules?”
“For sex?” Ed blinked. “Baby, it’s not that serious,” she guided his head to her shoulder and he grunted. “We’re just fucking around, there’s no goal. If you’re not having fun, we need to stop. We won’t be mad.” She rubbed his arm and hoped it was soothing as Stede nodded.
“Are you going to make me say I like this out loud every five fucking minutes?”, he asked bitterly, his posture rigid and awkward against her.
She sighed, “I’m not making fun of you, Iz. You always look so pissed, I could use the reassurance.” It felt needy to say. “I’m not worried about Stede, he’s clearly having the time of his life,” she ruffled Stede’s hair and he giggled.
“But you’re worried about me,” Izzy concluded and she nodded. “Fuck, alright. I wasn’t ready to even admit this shit to myself,” he fidgeted with the hem of his trousers and her heart grew cold and heavy in her chest. “But it’s been decades- I never would have been ready on my own. I’m not pissed at either of you, I’m the one who can’t keep up.” She dropped her arm from around his shoulders to let him pull away but he scoffed and leaned into her, relaxing so that they fit together. “I want to. I’m trying. Yesterday, we were friends and I’d just gotten used to that, and now you’re both saying fucking…” he gestured vaguely. “You know, that you love each other and shit.”
Stede hummed patiently, holding Izzy’s hand and playing with his fingers, “do you need us to slow down?” Izzy shook his head and Stede kissed his hand. “We love you, too, you know? Even when you’re an asshole. It doesn’t even bother me anymore, I think it’s cute now.” He teased.
“ You’re an asshole,” Izzy countered, “and it’s not fucking cute.” Ed was about to call him a liar when he leaned over her and tugged Stede in for a kiss by his wrapping gown.
“Oh, shit, back to it then?” Ed grinned and leaned back for a better view as Izzy opened Stede’s gown and pulled it down his arms. Stede freed his hands to grab at Izzy’s chest and ass, his gown falling to his lap. Precum couldn’t have been good for the silk, so really, she was being responsible when she took it to bare him entirely. She carefully climbed down from the bed to hang it up, lettering her own drape open around her shoulders to protect the lining. She looked back in time to see Izzy climb into Stede’s lap and shove him backwards hard enough to make the bed ropes creak. “Woah, Iz, gentle!”
Stede laughed, waving a hand, “I’m alright, dear, he’s all show- ah fuck! You bit me?” Ed worried she’d have to pull them apart, but Stede laughed again. “You little shit,” he kissed him with a grin, “why’s he so naughty, Ed?”
“He likes to be punished,” she answered knowingly, trying not to think about the toe. She shook her head to hide the shudder, and though she had to force the smile, it felt real when she looked at them. Izzy had Stede pinned to the bed by his wrists with one hand so that he could grope his chest with the other, and he was kissing him to shut him up. “I dunno why you were so stressed, Iz. Seems like you’ve got pretty good instincts for this.”
Izzy pulled away, growling down at Stede’s smile. “He just makes me so fucking angry.”
Ed scoffed and dropped herself back on the bed, laying down and stretching her back until it popped. “He makes you horny,” she corrected, “and that pisses you off.” Izzy glared at her briefly before looking away and it was clear he knew she was right.
“It’s not entirely his fault,” Stede argued, tapping the brass-tipped horn buttons on the fall of Izzy’s trousers and making his whole body tense, “I push his buttons on purpose.” His head rolled to the side to smile at her. His brows raised as his eyes dragged over the length of her body framed in iridescent silk, “oh, hello, beautiful,” he breathed softly.
She rolled onto her side and smiled into her palm, “you’ve seen me.”
He wriggled a hand free of Izzy’s grip to reach for her, and only his fingertips touched. He drew a line from her clavicle to the patch of short curls under her stomach, where his hand fell away. “I’ll never get used to this,” he said, and it sounded like a promise. He lifted a knee, pressed it against Izzy’s hip, and rolled. They landed a few inches away from Ed, Izzy now pinned beneath Stede. They kissed and she laid her head on her arm to happily watch. Stede left Izzy’s hands free to roam and he dragged his knuckles tantalizingly between the crests of her hips. Stede fumbled with the fall of Izzy’s trousers, pulling back enough to search his eyes, “may I?”. Izzy nodded and Ed really wanted to help. Izzy’s dick strained against the fall, dampening the linen at the tip. Two sets of hands worked faster than one could. His cock sprang free and she watched Stede’s fingers wrap around it the moment he had access. She had to distract herself if she wanted to last long enough for someone to actually touch her. She cupped Izzy’s cheek to turn his head so that she could kiss him. His fingers carded through her pubic hair and she moaned. It would have taken Izzy less effort to just grab her, but he carefully teased her instead, pulling back each time her hips moved. Their kiss broke frequently for gasps and moans drawn out by the clumsy but eager pace Stede set. As Stede gasped and Izzy panted with his forehead to hers, she looked down. Stede had Izzy’s cock pressed to his own, both encircled in his fist. Stede was unrestrained, making no effort to hide his obscene whines and moans.
Ed impulsively laid her hand over his, likely contributing very little despite the profound wave of emotion she hadn’t expected. Dick grabbing had never been very meaningful to her before. Everything about sex was different with them. Stede was loud in a way she’d never encountered, honest and natural. Izzy’s movements frequently had the appearance of the aggression she was used to, but his touch was caring. “I love you so much”, she whispered, almost against Izzy’s lips. He huffed and she kissed the swallow on his neck. She slipped her hand off Stede’s, but still followed his movements. Their skin was soft and heated beneath her palm, and the only strategy her foggy mind could come up with to keep from touching herself was to bite her free hand. Izzy’s grunts and swallowed moans were hard to make out as Stede began babbling incoherently, but her ear was in the perfect spot to hear it all as she sucked and nipped a mark under his jaw.
“Ah! Not the silk, not the silk, not the silk,” Stede pushed her sleeve up her arm and out of the way just before he came on Izzy’s chest. She felt the warmth spill over her fingers and froze. Izzy’s breath stopped for a moment before returning with a shudder. She pulled away to find him fighting a smile with dark eyes. Relief washed through her and she let herself admire the sight of Izzy, disheveled and half naked, Stede’s cum slowly turning clear on his heaving chest. “Fuck, you’re pretty, Izzy,” Stede huffed, making him roll his eyes and look away, but he didn’t stop smiling.
Ed looked at Stede, pink cheeked and glittering with sweat, and she sat up to kiss him. He hadn’t caught his breath, so she pecked at his cheeks and neck. She kept her eyes down every time she opened them, to watch him soften. He was so cute. Stede grabbed Izzy’s dick again and got back to it. She nipped his neck before slipping off the bed and hanging her gown next to Stede’s and they were both watching her when she turned back. “Am I distracting you?” She bent over the arm of the couch, leaving her ass higher than her head as she leaned down to kiss and bite at Izzy’s hip. He tensed and pushed into Stede’s hand. She grabbed his hip and held him down, pulling his legs open to work on another mark on the inside of his thigh.
Izzy strained against her, but didn’t really struggle, “You’re both-“ he gasped when she nipped his skin with her canines and Stede picked up the pace, “fucking sadists.”
“Aww, poor Izzy,” she teased, “two lovers focused entirely on making you feel good.” She tilted her head, just one inch to the right, and it was all it took to nuzzle against his balls and make him choke, gripping the blanket tight enough to stretch the fibers. “Must be torture.”
“It is ,” he growled, covering his face with both hands as his hips jerked against her hold.
Stede didn’t hide how funny he found Izzy’s dramatics, but she was pretty sure Izzy enjoyed the embarrassment. He lowed his hand so drastically that she thought he’d stopped entirely. “Are we being too nice to you?”, he asked sympathetically and Ed watched him draw his hand up Izzy’s cock, painfully slow. “Do we need to be harsher?” His voice held the promise of something wicked and Izzy nodded desperately. “Oof,” Stede giggled and leaned down to kiss his cheek sweetly, “too bad.” He sped up again, kissing him lovingly. Ed rubbed his thighs and hips, nuzzling him to press her lips to the base of his dick. Izzy put a hand on her head, swearing and pushing her away. He bit his other palm and Stede didn’t let go until he was writhing and swatting at his arm. As Izzy’s arched back fell to the bed and he fought to regain his breath, Stede looked over his shoulder at Edward with intent.
A laugh forced its way out of her nose when she tried to catch it with her hand. “It looked like you fucking killed him,” she gasped for air, but the laughter won over. She pointed to herself, “I’m next?”
Stede sat up and twisted around to point at her, jokingly menacing. “You’re next,” he confirmed.
She laughed into her arms and Izzy groaned. “Ugh. Fucking cute,” he admitted begrudgingly. He grimaced down at his chest and Stede found a rag to clean him up with. Izzy couldn’t look at him. “You don’t have to do that…”
“I want to,” he shrugged, but left no room for argument. “Let me take care of you,” he said softly, and Izzy’s eyes shined. Stede tossed the rag in the laundry basket and knocked Izzy’s hand away when he tried to tuck himself back into his trousers. “These are dirty,” he unbuttoned the waistband a tried to pull them down, but Izzy wouldn’t lift his hips.
“I could still sleep in them,” Izzy held his trousers up and tried to put the fall back into place.
Ed stopped him, taking his hand in hers and flipping it back down with her pinky. “It’s too hot,” she rolled over on the armrest, feeling gravity pull her cock onto the underside of her belly as she eyed theirs. She wasn’t sure exactly why she was into flaccid dicks. Maybe it was the same reason she’d always felt that kissing was more intimate than sex. The simple fact that Stede hadn’t sought his gown and Izzy was willing to wait was heartwarming and it gave an unfamiliar message; ‘I’m staying’. “Let’s sleep naked tonight,” she suggested, too distracted to meet anyone’s eye as she struggled to control her hands. Not touching herself was a super-human feat and she was unable to sustain it as she watched Stede wrestle Izzy out of his trousers.
Stede noticed her hands moving to her lap and he shook his head, “that’s our job, Ed, just be patient.”
“I’m trying,” she whined and dropped her hands by her head.
Stede tossed the trousers and leaned against the backrest, patting his lap, “come here, darling.” She scrambled properly onto the couch and he arranged her with a grip on her hips to sit with her back to his chest. He nudged her ankles forward and drew her knees apart to feel her inner thighs. “Izzy,” Stede called, shaking him from his frozen staring, “still with us?”
Izzy rolled his eyes and crawled between their legs. “Smug bastard,” he muttered, “just because you see her naked every day, fucking used to it by now,” he kissed her bad knee, still grumbling.
“Oh, I never really looked,” Stede put his chin on her shoulder and traced the tattoos on her stomach, “that would have been rude.”
Ed buried her nose in his hair, “but I wanted you to,” she complained. Stede’s hands slipped up to graze a thumb over her nipple and his knuckles along the underside of her cock. “Holy shit,” she gasped, her legs tight around Izzy’s shoulders as he ventured further up her thigh. Ed reflexively covered her mouth, but she remembered that Stede wanted to hear.
When she dropped her hand and let herself cry out, he froze. She tried to ask him what was wrong, but Izzy’s teeth grazed the inside of her thigh and stopped her thought. “You made that sound when I stabbed you,” he whispered and she wondered if she heard guilt in his voice.
“Only when you pulled out,” she grabbed his wrist in hopes of encouraging him to move. The soft pressure of his grip and the heat of his hand was delightful, but she needed friction, “please.”
“Did I hurt you?” He started to let go and she shook her head. “Is that a universal sound, then? Pain, pleasure, doesn’t matter, you just-“ he pumped his fist steadily until she moaned.
“Just pleasure,” Izzy corrected against the tendon in the join of her hip and thigh. “Pain sounds different. You wouldn’t like it.”
“Oh,” Stede hummed, seeming troubled as he kissed her neck gently. Her legs tensed, her hips pushing into his hand and Izzy, but she kept herself quiet. “Edward,” Stede sped up and rolled her nipple between his thumb and forefinger. She whined in the back of her throat and he pinched it, “why’d you stop?” Stede squeezed the head lightly before abandoning it for several strokes. She felt something wet and hot and she wouldn’t have been able to suppress her moan if her life depended on it when she looked down at Izzy with the tip of her dick in his mouth. “Good girl,” He sang in her ear. She was half aware that she was babbling, a lot of “yes” repeated along with their names. She was worried that someone might hear, though she wasn’t sure who she was afraid of. Stede contributed to praise her, telling her how beautiful she was and how much he loved her. She tried to warn Izzy, but he held eye contact with her as he swallowed her length. Stede played with her nipples and Izzy seemed adamant about her cumming down his throat. Her hands were lost in Izzy’s hair and she forced herself to keep her eyes open through it, as much as she could. She knew she was being loud, but there was no helping it.
“Ooh-ooh-sensitive,” she accidentally closed her legs around Izzy’s head with a wince and he pulled away, his gaze hungry. She laughed breathlessly and smiled at him, running her hands through his hair. “We should do this again sometime,” she patted Stede’s thigh and Izzy’s shoulder, her body feeling heavy. She tried to roll out from between them, but she just flopped face first on the bed covers. “I’ll get the candles,” she promised. They might not have heard her- her voice was muffled.
“The fuck you will,” Izzy pulled himself out from between her legs and rearranged her with Stede’s help to lay her head on a pillow. She stuck her tongue out at them. Izzy scoffed, but he smiled as he and Stede walked away to make the preparations for sleep. Stede moved the library chairs around the breakfast table and Izzy put out all but two candles. They argued for a moment over arrangements, but a decision was made and Izzy climbed over Ed to lay next to her. It was dim, but two flames and the moon were enough to see the movement of his half-hard cock. A candle was put on the windowsill and the curtain was drawn closed. There was no effort made to get under the covers as Stede laid on the couch on his side to drape an arm and leg over Ed. She wrapped an arm around him and held his head close.
“I still can’t believe this is happening,” she admitted as she entered the feeling of their skin on hers.
“It’s wild,” Stede agreed, kissing her nipple and making her shiver, “we had sex .”
Izzy propped himself up on his elbows to eye Stede, “that wasn’t sex.”
Ed raised an eyebrow, “what else would you call that?”
“I don’t know, fucking around- why are we even-“ He covered his face and groaned.
“It felt like a bit more than that, I think,” Stede said. He hadn’t moved his mouth and he let his tongue swipe over her nipple. She whined and he was hard again against her thigh.
“Sex is like- well I’d say it’s whatever you do to nut,” she philosophized.
Stede nodded and raised a hand to play with her other nipple, “or to attempt to,” He amended and Ed nodded.
Izzy scoffed, “No, because then by that metric, pulling yourself off is sex”
“Yes.” Ed and Stede agreed.
“No!” He rolled over to sit up with his arms folded. “Come on, you can have sex with yourself? ‘Go fuck yourself’- you can really do that?”
Ed laughed, “Of course you can.”
“I think you’d need a marital aid,” Stede said thoughtfully. She giggled and buried her face in his hair to kiss his head.
Izzy rubbed his face with both hands, likely to hide how charmed he was. “ You need a marital aid,” he growled.
“To fuck myself? I agree, I would,” Stede reached up to ruffle Izzy’s hair.
Izzy groaned and waved him away half-heartedly. After a while of silence, he said, “your definition of sex is stupid.” He gestured to Stede’s lips pressed to Ed’s breast, “is this sex? Does it depend on intent or outcome?”
Stede shrugged and closed his lips around her nipple, ruining his tongue over it before pulling back with a smile, “I don’t know. It’s definitely related to sex.”
They argued for what felt like hours, Izzy coming up with examples and Stede remaining consistent in his definition. Ed kept nodding off and waking up to that sounded like an entirely different debate than the one she’d last heard. She opened her eyes in time to see the candles burn out. “Boys? Did anyone put a stocking on the door?” The only answer was a snore, and she couldn’t keep her eyes open. She buried her hands on their short hair to keep them close on her shoulders and they tucked themselves closer to her in their sleep. The air was warm and the blanket was stuck beneath them. She guessed someone would just have to get an eyeful when they came to wake them in the morning.