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“Have you ever gotten high, Tina?” Nick asks with one of those little grins he has. “Smoked weed? Eaten an edible?”
The two of them are sitting on the roof of George’s apartment to get away from the noise. They’re always fighting, Nick had said about George and Alex, and it’s really true. The roof is much better, despite the early spring chill and occasional drizzle.
“Not really,” she replies, embarrassed. Nick is such a force of nature. Barely twenty-one, but it feels like he’s living life accelerated; spending time around him is just getting caught in the wake of that warp speed. No, Tina has never gotten high.
He laughs. “’Not really,’ what does that mean?” he asks. It’s not mean-spirited – his teasing never is, even when she acts offended by it – but she still blushes.
“I mean- no, I haven’t gotten high,” she replies. “I don’t usually hang out with stoners.”
“Oh, okay, I’ll just go, then,” Nick says, grin spreading wider.
Tina sighs. “Sapnap, you’re so annoying,” she pouts. “You know I didn’t mean it like that at all.”
“I know, I know,” he says, and looks at her. “Y’know, we’re off-stream, you don’t have to keep calling me Sapnap. It’s just Nick.”
“Nick,” she echoes. His eyes are still blue in the gray afternoon light, and his hair is escaping that eternal baseball cap, frizzing up in the wet air. She smiles. He smiles back, and it’s like a ray of sunshine cutting through the heavy clouds. He leans closer, just enough for her to imagine that she can feel his heartbeat in the air around her.
“Fucking right. So, would you like to get high, Miss Tina Kitten?” He produces a bowl out of nowhere. It’s quite pretty, all red and orange and yellow marbled glass, but Tina is suddenly filled with nervousness.
“Jesus Christ, um. I don’t know,” she replies. “It won’t hurt my lungs, right?”
“Nah.” Nick gives her a disarming shrug and shakes his head. “You might cough a few times and uh. You might feel like you’re dying, but you absolutely won’t be.”
She raises her eyebrows at him. “Uh-huh. That’s not, like... super encouraging, Mister Nick Sapnap.”
“Aw, do you not trust me?” he retorts, eyes sparkling. “Do I seem like a bad influence to you? Is that it?”
Maybe, she wants to reply. You seem like a boy who wants to impress me, and a man I don’t quite know what to do with, and you make me dizzy because I just don’t know what to think about you. I don’t think that means you’re a bad influence.
“Yes,” she says out loud. “You’re a very naughty boy, very-” A giggle cracks through her stern façade and she gives it up. Nick snorts.
“Okay, sure. I can be naughty. Have you ever heard of shotgunning?” There’s a sudden glint in his eyes that makes her feel a little sweaty, like he’s telling a joke that she should already know the punchline for.
“No, what’s that?” she asks cautiously, but Nick isn’t actually a bad influence, right? He’s never been anything but kind to her, even when he says the kinds of things that she’s called him an asshole for. He’s always joking, and he always makes sure you know it, and Tina realizes with some surprise that she feels paradoxically safe around him.
Off-balance? Yes. Left behind? Absolutely, and yet she knows it’s not on purpose. That’s just how he lives. He would never hurt her, or even consciously upset her.
“Oh, do you...” He coughs, and he’s just a boy again. Just a blustering, scruffy boy two years younger than her, looking up at the sky and shaking his head with embarrassment. “I was joking, do you not actually know? I mean, of course, I guess that makes sense. You don’t hang out with stoners.”
“That was a joke too!” she exclaims. “You’re so annoying!” She slaps his shoulder. “Okay, but now you have to tell me what it is.”
Nick looks at her with a grin again and shakes his head. “No, I don’t. It’s not gonna be funny anymore.”
“Alright, then, I’ll just google it on the wonderful world wide web,” she replies. He adjusts his cap, and for some reason, she wonders what his hair smells like under it. Probably nothing good, her rational brain reminds her, but the thought lingers.
“Okay, fine, it’s a way of getting high that’s not really smoking,” Nick starts. “The experienced smoker takes a hit, and then brings his lips to the other person’s lips and breathes the smoke into her mouth.” He shrugs, fake casual, easy smile hovering around his lips. “That’s shotgunning.”
“Oh, that’s just kissing, but with weed,” Tina says, and then her brain catches up to all the implications of Nick suggesting they try it. “Oh, wait a second-”
“In my defense, I thought we were flirting,” he interrupts.
“We were flirting?” Tina shrieks.
“Oh, like that’s so awful,” Nick retorts with a hurt expression.
“Wait, hold on, hold on,” she says, and puts her face in her hands. Of course. For all his joking with the boys, he’s just another straight gamer who wants to have sex with one of the few women around. Tina is vaguely disappointed in both of them. Is it so hard for men and women to just be friends?
She sighs, but then her traitor brain just has to ask if it’s actually so awful that he wants to flirt with her. Like, is it really? If so, please list exactly why in five paragraph essay format.
Nick is handsome, Tina knows that, she just wasn’t thinking about it, but now she is. The fact is spiraling through her mind. His hair, so perfect for running her fingers through. Those gorgeous eyebrows and that strong jawline, the scruff and his massively muscular legs he sometimes shows on stream. Those strong hands, so comforting and warm... oh, yes, Tina knows how hot Nick is.
And now she’s thinking about it!
“I can actually go,” Nick says. “Sorry if I made you uncomfortable.”
And he’s genuinely a good guy, she thinks with a mental sigh, but I already knew that too.
Oh.
Oh.
Of course, that unbalanced feeling she has around him was just a crush. It makes so much sense. To feel both safe and uncomfortable, lost and found at the same time. Just a crush, all along.
She’s still vaguely disappointed in both of them, but that thought is rapidly being swallowed by other ones. The sweaty feeling is back, and she’s actually sweating now, dripping down between her breasts and drawing her attention lower. That stubble would burn so beautifully, she thinks, and it sounds like nonsense but feels like truth.
“No, no, please don’t go,” she finally replies. “I’m sorry, I- that's not bad. It’s not awful at all, I’m just... surprised. Don’t go, Nick.”
“Oh.” Nick blinks and then sits back down. Tina shivers, body heat washing over her. She opens her mouth, but she suddenly doesn’t know what to say.
“Well,” she manages after a second. “Let’s try it, then.” She doesn’t hear what Nick says in response, and she’s only barely aware of him taking out a plastic baggie of freshly-ground weed that he tips into the bowl of the pipe; the rushing in her ears is too loud. Nick is a bad influence, because why else would she be on the roof of a dinky apartment in London, about to get high for the first time by making out with him?
The lighter clicks; a glowing meteor piece fracturing off Nick’s descent through the clouds. She watches him inhale, cheeks puffing out before he turns to her.
She takes a shaky breath and leans in.
Nick’s lips surprise her, rough and gentle against hers. She gasps and he grabs her chin, slowly but firmly breathing the marijuana smoke into her mouth. “Now breathe in,” he whispers, and she obediently does.
He was right, she does end up coughing. It burns all the way down and then for several seconds after as it settles into her lungs.
“Just keep breathing,” Nick says, and she tries to. There’s no immediate effect. She stares up at the clouds and waits for the tears that sprang to her eyes to disappear. “So, how was that?” Nick asks after a while, another cloud of smoke escaping from his mouth.
“I don’t know yet,” Tina responds honestly. “Kinda unpleasant, but in the same way that alcohol is, you know what I mean?”
“Wanna try again?” he asks with a smirk, and she blushes.
“I do, actually,” she says as he takes another hit. One of his hands snakes around the back of her head and pulls her in, just as strong and warm and sure as she thought it would be. She loses track of time as they breathe their air into each other. It feels like they do it several more times, and the moments start to run together like raindrops on a window.
Nick is so warm, like a hibernating bear, the thought nonsensically occurs to her. At some point during their shotgunning, she ends up pressed against the lip of the roof as Nick covers her mouth with his, body to body. His hands skim up the sides of her thighs. She shivers again, and his tongue darts into her mouth, so obscenely wet. Her legs fall open, and maybe it’s just her that’s wet.
“So, that was shotgunning, this is just making out,” Nick mumbles into her mouth, and she accidentally knocks off his cap while woozily trying to put her arms around him. She buries her fingers into his hair in lieu of responding.
It’s so soft and curly, she doesn’t even mind that it feels like he hasn’t showered for a few days. He lets out a happy noise and kisses up her cheek to her ear. His tongue darts out again, precise and deadly, to lick her ear. She groans.
“Ew, have some class, losers,” George’s voice comes from the door to the roof. “Literally get a room, but not right now. We have to go pick up Karl and drop off Alex.”
Tina giggles. She’s not sure what’s so funny, but it seems like the appropriate response at the moment. Nick pulls away, and she grabs after his warmth. George raises his eyebrows, so she waves at him.
“I may have gotten Tina extremely high for the first time,” Nick mumbles.
“Very true,” she seconds.
“And you were making out with her in full view of the street, god, and unfortunately, me,” George grunts. “Is this new?”
“Ten minutes new,” Tina chirps. “I’m very happy about it.”
George shakes his head and sighs, turning to go back down the stairs. “Whatever. Whatever, I don’t care! We gotta go now, so come on. Don’t be too embarrassing, you guys. I can’t believe I have to say that to Tina.”
“Is he mad at me?” Tina asks Nick mournfully as he helps her up.
Nick shrugs. “Eh, if anyone, he’s mad at me, but don’t worry about it. George is just a crabby person. A whiny little baby, even.”
“Because you keep breaking his stuff,” she replies.
“Only when he deserves it,” Nick snickers.
Tina sneezes and bumps against him. “You’re so... you’re so mean, Mister Sapnap.”
“You love it,” he whispers into her hair, and she does. They both know it.
They try to behave while meeting Karl, but everything is funny to Tina right now, and even though Nick is used to being high, he laughs when she laughs. Part of Tina’s brain acknowledges that the other boys are probably getting quite annoyed at them; Karl keeps shooting the two of them wounded looks, and George makes a sour face every time Nick even comes close to touching her.
The four of them are hanging out in some park covered in lights when they come across a mirror. Tina has no idea where they are at this point, but she has enough of a brain left to know that they have to take a photo together for the Content. She gathers them around for a selfie, and Nick leans in with an innocent expression on his face.
Half a millisecond after she takes the picture, he squeezes her ass, and she squeals. Nick dissolves into giggles and George shakes his head while Karl watches silently.
“Nick! You are a naughty boy.” Tina wags her finger at him. “Naughty, naughty.”
“Not a boy, I’m a man,” he retorts, and is about to put his arms around her when George steps in between them and pushes them apart.
“Get out of here,” George snaps. “Just... go to a hotel, get it out of your system, and come back tomorrow morning. I’m serious.”
“But, George...” Nick protests.
“I’m serious,” George repeats.
“I’m sorry,” Tina whispers, and George sighs, glaring at Nick.
Karl comes out of nowhere to give her a quick hug. “You didn’t do anything wrong,” he says, and also glares at Nick, who throws his hands into the air.
“Fine! We’re going, since y’all clearly don’t want me here,” he grumbles. “See ya tomorrow, I guess.”
“Yeah, see you,” Karl replies quietly, and as Tina walks away with Nick, she wonders why Karl’s eyes look so sad.
“I’m sorry,” Tina repeats. Nick shakes his head.
“Karl was right, you really didn’t do anything wrong,” he says. “I think they’re just tired, it’s fine.”
They come across a hotel before they even have to walk very far, and Nick strides confidently up to the front desk like they’re not both obviously high as heaven. “Can you afford it?” Tina whispers, maybe a little louder than she intends to, and Nick scoffs.
“Tina, I’m rich,” he says, and goddamn her if his arrogance isn’t the sexiest thing she’s ever seen. True to his word, he has no problem securing them a room, and Tina finds herself pressed up against the door not even a second after it closes behind them.
Nick’s tongue slides into her mouth again like magma, burning and liquid and unstoppable. She melts away against the force, and he takes the opportunity to slide his hands up under her sweater. Her skin crackles where he touches it. Those strong hands grip and slide over her sweaty back and she moans.
“That’s just the beginning, baby girl,” Nick whispers hotly into her mouth, and normally Tina would laugh at any guy who tried to call her that, but the world is melting around her, and Nick is so confident and strong, she lets it happen.
“Nick...” she breathes, and he’s suddenly pulling back and leading her over to the bed. She sprawls onto it, shaky and panting, and turns over to see him leaning over her.
He smirks, turning his cap backwards. “I’m gonna make you feel so good,” he tells her, and she can only nod in agreement as he gently pulls her shoes off. The skirt and tights follow, and Tina shivers as the cool air brushes over her bare legs.
Nick kisses up the side of her calf, eyes locked with hers the entire time. They scorch her, despite the chill. He wants her so badly; Tina can see it. She can feel it with every mark he leaves on the skin of her thighs. He bites and sucks, but so gently, she’s squirming and leaking before he even comes close to her crotch.
He does come close, though, before she’s ready for it. That wicked tongue flickers around the edge of her panties and she moans, more from the promise of sensation than anything else.
“You’re so wet for me, baby,” he breathes reverently. His fingers carefully trace over her panties and she moans again. “Oh, yeah, good girl.” He leans down to take a deep sniff of the damp cloth. She whimpers, covering her mouth.
“Oh my god, oh Jesus,” she whispers through her hands. “Nick, please.”
He slides his hands under her shirt and straightens up to push it over her head. His arms go around her to unhook her bra and his breath brushes hot against her ear as he asks, “Please, what? Use your words, princess.”
She gasps as his hands cover her breasts. She can’t even bring herself to call him annoying, or any other perfectly rational response. She’s exposed under him and he’s grinning down at her with absolute confidence while she soaks through her panties, and all she can manage is another pathetic whimper.
“Please touch me,” she gasps. He strokes her nipples and she moans again.
“But I am touching you,” he replies with that shit-eating smirk. “Do you mean... lower?” He rubs a thumb over her bottom lip until she tentatively opens up, and then hooks it over her tongue, forcing her to suck on it. She nods desperately.
He bends down to kiss her cheek. The thumb slides out of her mouth and tracks a wet trail down her stomach where it hooks on her waistline instead. She shudders, and he kisses down her neck, cradling the back of her head with his other hand. His stubble scratches against her skin, just on the right side of painful, while his intoxicatingly musky scent fills her nostrils.
“Good girl,” he mutters against her jawline. Up here, his kisses are feather-light, careful not to leave marks, but they increase in pressure the farther he moves down. Down, down, down to her panties again, which he gives another reverent sniff before carefully pulling them off.
Tina is silently grateful that she has a habit of shaving before traveling, because while she would hope that Nick would still want her whether smooth or not, it’s just never a guarantee with straight guys. Either way, it’s not a problem, and the thought flits out of her head as Nick gently brushes his fingers over her clit.
She lets out a loud moan, cut off in a gasp as he presses a kiss to her outer labia. She really is wet – it's probably already pooling on the sheets – and Nick laps it up like a dog, dipping his tongue gently into her folds and then dragging it up over her urethra. Tina is shaking like she’s feverish, it’s uncontrollable.
Nick growls happily and swirls his tongue over her clit. It’s a lightning bolt of pleasure that she feels all the way to her fingertips. He lets out a happy noise, and she realizes she must’ve squealed loudly.
“Told ya I’d make you feel good,” he says, and then grabs her thighs to spread her wider.
She just lets him do it, unable to think of anything else except the insane pleasure as his tongue spears into her pussy over and over again. His stubble scrapes up against her lips as he licks deeper, and she sobs. He growls again, encouraged.
“Nick, please, please, fuck,” she whimpers, not even knowing what she’s asking for. It’s already too much, but every time he backs off for air, she feels the loss. His wet, wet tongue finds spots along the sides of her labia that sing with heat, and every time he touches her clit she feels like her soul leaps up to heaven for a second.
He eats her out hungrily, like it’s a five-course meal and he hasn’t had food in weeks. When he presses into her vagina itself, she groans, caught between the agony of his facial hair rubbing her raw and the gentle softness of his tongue filling her up.
The next time she babbles some begging nonsense, he brushes his thumb over her clit and she clenches her thighs around his head reflexively. He moans, burying his face deeper inside her. They stay like that for a few seconds, Nick frantically slobbering inside her lips while she sobs with helpless overstimulation.
Eventually, her legs fall open and Nick gasps for breath, rubbing his cheek against her inner thighs like he’ll die if he stops touching her even for a moment. Tina feels scraped raw and numb. Everything is tingling and the world is just a bit too bright. Nick’s beard on the delicate skin of her thighs is a sharp point of awareness, but it’s nothing compared to what she was just experiencing.
“Oh, you taste so good, princess,” Nick moans, and she reaches down woozily to rub his head. The stupid cap is somehow still on and she tries to knock it off his head. “Hey!” he grunts, but doesn’t try to stop her, and she gets it off eventually so she can sink her fingers into his hair and cling there for a second to catch her breath.
She can feel her heartbeat everywhere. Her pussy juices are dripping off Nick’s beard and running down the inside of her leg, and he moves to press another soft kiss to her clit. She moans weakly, something stirring deep in her core, a building wave.
“Round one,” Nick says, and straightens up to his knees. He unbuckles his belt and unzips his jeans. The noises jolt Tina into another gush of arousal.
Nick, wait, let me catch my breath, she means to say, but her body wants this. Her body wants him inside her more fiercely than she can remember wanting anything else.
“I don’t have any condoms,” Nick says mournfully, even as he takes out his hard cock, and Tina would deny it if he asked, but she drools at the sight of it.
He’s hairy, which is no surprise, but thick and clean and perfect. Not too big, but the thought of it filling her up brings Tina a deep sense of satisfaction.
“Don’t... worry,” she mumbles, wondering why everything feels so hazy and soft. “I’m on birth control. Yeah.”
“Can I?” Nick breathlessly asks. “Oh, fuck, Tina, can I breed you? I’m gonna fill you up so good.”
Tina shudders and lets her legs fall open, feeling his hands trace along her thighs again as he hovers over her. “Yes, please, god,” she whispers. “I want you inside me, Nick.”
He doesn’t need any more encouragement than that, thrusting deep into her before she even finishes speaking. He bottoms out, and Tina lets out a deep moan of contentment. Her thoughts were right; he fills her up so satisfyingly. She feels complete, and then Nick starts moving.
He fucks like he ate her out: aggressively, desperately, hungrily. His fingers dig into her thighs as he bends her over and pounds into her like an animal. Flashes of color burst in the air around Tina, but it’s dead silent except for Nick’s heavy panting as he thrusts into her again and again.
She stretches around him, lets him fold her in half. He didn’t even bother to undress, so the polyester of his jacket rubs back and forth against her overheated skin as he rails her. At some point, he lets out a guttural moan and lets his head drop to her chest, plowing into her as he buries his face between her breasts.
It feels like fireworks are exploding under every inch of her skin. Each time Nick bottoms out, it triggers another wave. She whimpers, trying not to scream. It’s good, it’s so good, but her back hurts, and her thighs are sore and red from his stubble, and her pussy was already overstimulated even before he started fucking her.
“Nick,” she gasps after few minutes. “It’s- it’s too much, slow down. Please. I’m-” He pushes in particularly deep, and the building wave inside of her comes just a little closer to breaking the dam.
“I’m so close,” he pants. “Tina, holy fuck, you feel so good around me.” He slows down, though, slightly. Each thrust is now a careful stab instead of a frenzied attack.
She realizes in surprise that there are tears running down her cheeks. It’s so hard to be aware of anything else when Nick is pounding away inside her like he’s trying to get her pregnant, but now that Tina can breathe, she realizes how she’s dripping with sweat and out of breath, and aching wherever he puts his fingers.
Nick is already starting to speed up again, but he’s not going so deep anymore, just shallow thrusts that rub his cock against her vaginal walls deliciously. He lets go of one of her legs to start rubbing fingers over her clit again, and the dam is so close to cracking.
“I’m gonna cum,” he says breathlessly. “Fucking hell, baby girl. I’m cumming inside you, h- hope that’s alright.”
Tina nods and he squeezes his eyes shut, groaning. Four more deep thrusts, and she can feel his cum squirting inside her, hot and wet and making her feel violated and loved at the same time. Nick lets out another growl and spits on his fingers, swirling them around her clit faster now that he’s not distracted.
“Show me how good I made you feel,” Nick commands, and he really is so ridiculous sometimes, but that doesn’t stop his fingers from sending sparks of pleasure throughout her body until one hits that spot deep inside her. She clenches around his cock reflexively, and that fullness is the final straw.
The damn crumbles and the wave breaks.
When Tina stops swearing and sobbing, Nick finally pulls out. She sinks into the bed, completely exhausted. Every bone feels like jelly.
“Bet you won’t call me a boy ever again,” Nick snickers from somewhere to the left, and she would roll her eyes, but it’s true. Not after that.
“You’re right,” she replies tiredly, and then he’s right there next to her, sitting down on the side of her bed and gently rubbing her stomach.
“Thank you,” he says. She looks up to meet his eyes, and everything is still hazy, but the sincerity in them is clear as daylight. It’s not hard to remember everything wonderful about him when he looks at her like that. “Now,” he continues, “you need to piss or you’ll get a UTI.”
“I know that,” she grunts, but she doesn’t move an inch.
“Oh, what, did I fuck you so good you can’t even stand up?” He waggles his eyebrows at her ridiculously.
“You are the most self-confident, arrogant, absolutely ludicrous man I’ve ever met,” Tina mumbles at him, wagging her finger, “but, uh... yes.”
“And you are the most beautiful, sweet, sexy, perfect woman I’ve ever met,” he retorts, bending over to kiss her forehead. “Now, ask me to carry you to the bathroom.”
She swats at his shoulder, and he grabs her wrist, bending over to kiss her breathless once again. She holds his face between her palms and rubs her thumbs over his cheekbones, letting herself sink into the sheer intimacy of it all.
“Okay, you win,” she whispers against his lips after a moment. “Mister Nick Sapnap, could you please carry me to the bathroom?” She really can’t walk, which is an acceptable excuse. There’s a deep ache between her legs, and she doesn’t want to know what rubbing her thighs together would feel like. “It’s your beard’s fault,” she says out loud.
“Good!” Nick replies, grandly sweeping her into his arms bridal-style. “My evil plan is working.”
“You’re so annoying,” she says with a tired scoff, nuzzling into his chest.
“You love it,” he mumbles into her hair. And he’s right, she really does.