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Zoro wasn’t usually like this, actually, he was never like this. Thoughts about the ship’s archeologist had become natural to him over the course of several months, and less than savoury fantasies had plagued his mind during many a night.
But that wasn’t the issue right now. No, the issue was that his eye had lingered a second too long on Nico Robin, who was currently sunbathing on the Sunny’s lawn, with book in hand. That one second was all it took for him to memorize every curve, line, and crease that her beautiful figure drew. Oh, and it was also enough time for all the blood in his head to rush straight to his cock.
It was the first time he had gotten an erection in the middle of the day, while standing right out in the open on the ship.
His coat could only help so much, and before he could even panic, Sanji came barreling out of the kitchen, dessert tray in hand.
“NAMI-SWAAA-”
The blond ran straight into Zoro’s back, and his face morphed from bliss to utter disgust. “Oi, Marimo-head! Watch where you’re standing!”
As much as Zoro would love to talk back, there was something else that needed his attention, urgently. “Tch, you’re the one who ran into me,” he replied, making a show of walking towards the kitchen, pretending it was his destination all along. In reality, he needed to get somewhere- anywhere, private. Sanji looked back at him and shrugged, flying off to look for his precious navigator.
He carefully stepped into the kitchen, shutting the door behind him and paused, trying to think. What was he going to do now? What options-
His train of thought screeched to a halt, and he slowly lifted his hand off the door knob, hovering it just above his crotch.
If he did this- Sanji could walk in at any moment- Then hurry the hell up!
His hand collapsed to his coat, and he let out a guttural moan as he began palming his erection through the cloth. His other hand didn’t hesitate to untie his sash, pulling open his coat, and reaching for the buttons on his trousers.
He managed to pull his rock hard member free from its tight confines, and gave it an experimental tug, before clapping his hand over his mouth to suppress his moans. He imagined Robin, kneeling in front of him, her soft hands roaming his inner thighs, and her mouth exploring his shaft. She was licking stripes from the base to the tip, occasionally swirling her tongue on it’s head.
He was already in heaven, his hand frantically pumping his cock, and he cracked his eye open, breaking his illusion for a split second.
Then, he spotted it. A cup of coffee that Sanji had prepared for Robin, resting on a plate and tray on the counter, still steaming hot.
He inched across the kitchen, one hand leaning on the wall, while the other hand jerked away. He tried to be as silent as possible, but his body betrayed him, and would let out a periodic whimper or groan.
His breathing was heavy as he picked up the cup and placed it on the floor, sinking to his knees. Returning to his fantasy, he imagined Robin leaning against his side, whispering in his ear as her hand pulled on his cock, rubbing precise circles on his slit with her thumb.
He leaned over the coffee cup, thrusting desperately into his hand, and choked, “R-Robin-...!”
His ejaculation hit the cup violently, splashing some coffee onto the plate below. He milked the rest of the cum out of his cock slowly, panting as he watched it drip into the dark liquid.
When he was done, he leaned back blissfully, but his euphoria was interrupted by the realization that Sanji would come back at any second.
With a jump, he returned the cup to its former position on the tray, quickly rinsed his hands, and fixed his clothes. Just as he finished tying his sash, Sanji slammed open the kitchen door, and paused to raise an eyebrow at him. “What are you still doing in here?”
“What, I can’t get a drink, Curlybrow?” Zoro shot back, a little too defensively.
The chef hummed in suspicion, and stepped over to pick up Robin’s snack tray. “ Excuse me ,” he spoke sharply, leering at Zoro before taking out a handkerchief and wiping up the coffee droplets on the plate.
There was no way he had spilled any when he poured the cup, and he racked his head in confusion. His head spun back to look at the mosshead, narrowing his eyes.
“Wh-What?” Zoro sputtered, crossing his arms.
An awkward staredown later, Sanji’s expression broke into surprise. Zoro held his breath as his heartbeat blared like an alarm. Had he figured it out?-
“You've distracted me, you damn nuisance! Poor Robin-chwan is outside waiting for her drink.” Sanji scolded, lifting the tray and heading for the door. He pushed it open, hollering some incomprehensible bullshit to Robin.
When the door finally shut, Zoro breathed a heavy sigh of relief, clutching his hand over his jaw. That was way too close. He gave himself a few slaps on the face, trying to regain his composure. He'd spent too much time in the kitchen, no doubt the crew would be suspicious if he stayed any longer without actually consuming or cooking anything.
Giving a final splash of water to his face, he creaked open the door, and stepped out into the open, subtly peeking at anyone who was sitting outside today, making sure they didn't notice what had just happened in their kitchen.
His gaze finally landed on Robin, who was in the same spot as before. She had her drink beside her now, alongside a small teacake. Something in her book must've been amusing, as she wore a small smile, and gently reached for her cup.
It might've been his imagination, but as her mouth touched the lip of the cup, her eyes locked onto his, the entire sip. When she pulled it away, her lip seemed to curl into a smirk. Yet in a blink, the smug look disappeared, and she resumed her reading.
Zoro stared, dumbfounded, before shaking himself out of a daze, and started across the lawn. He’d forgotten what he was doing before this entire ordeal, and decided to retire back into the crow’s nest. He couldn’t stay out here any longer and risk pitching another tent in his pants.