Chapter Text
Sylvain plays dumb but he’s never truly out of his depth. However, walking into Ashe and Dedue’s upstairs bedroom, he always feels a bit lost. To be fair, Ashe was explicitly clear about the parameters of their little arrangement. He would meet with Ashe and Dedue individually then both of them together. When he joked about Ashe being “the nice one”, both men laughed. Sylvain has a sneaking suspicion that they were laughing at him, not with him.
Dedue greets him with a smile and an offer of tea. He sits in the arm chair across from the other man and gleefully takes a cup. He’s been in this room a thousand times since the Ubert-Molinaros scraped him off the floor of some misbegotten tavern after Felix’s engagement to Annette - he knew it was going to hit hard; just not that hard. Since then, Ashe and Dedue have offered their tea and often bluntly honest advice to the hapless noble. Sylvain repays them in kind, walking them through dealing with politics, business and willful personalities. Sylvain isn’t used to being a third wheel but it beats skulking around Gautier, reeling from the death of his hateful father and the understanding but brutal rejection of his romantic feelings for his best friend.
“You should be proud of such an accomplishment, Sylvain.” Dedue says after he finishes regaling him of his most recent time in Sreng.
“An armistice isn’t a treaty. I can’t celebrate yet.” Sylvain can’t keep the acid out of his tone. “I can’t help but feel my father or hell, even Miklan would’ve resolved this already.”
“You know they had no interest in resolving anything.” Dedue replies just as pointedly. “You’re the only Gauiter who has ever sought peace with Sreng.”
“Peace is not exactly a Margrave’s job.” Sylvain shoots back. He places his half empty tea cup down and runs a hand through his hair. It’s getting a bit long. “I’m not even sure there’s a place for Gautier in times of peace. Without the Sreng border conflict, is there even a reason for us to exist?”
“You’re worth more to Dimitri than what you can do for him,” Dedue leans forward, taking Sylvain’s hand. He’s shaking again. Hearing that from Dedue - of all people - tears a heavy sigh from Sylvain's chest. Dedue is always right but he can’t help but doubt.
“I just want all the trouble I put them through to be worth it.” A heavy silence settles between them. Sylvain is rarely ever quiet. Honestly, Dedue doesn’t know what to do when he’s like this. Sylvain is a complicated man; a deep thinker, despite his efforts to appear otherwise. All he can do in these moments is let him know that he’s not alone or provide a brief moment of respite. He pats Sylvain’s hand and leans back.
“One thing is certain, though.” Dedue replies. Sylvain looks back and Dedue gives him a small, slightly awkward smile. “You won’t figure it out tonight and trying will only make it worse.” Sylvain returns his smile, laughing weakly.
“Right, right…I’m here for a reason. I guess.” Sylvain’s voice cracks like he can’t believe he just said that.
“Are you having second thoughts?” Dedue doesn’t want to do this if Sylvain has even the the slightest reservation.
“What? No. Hell no . It’s just…” Sylvain trails off. “Are you sure this is alright? I mean Ashe…”
“It was Ashe’s idea.” Dedue replies. “Did you forget?” The playful lilt to Dedue’s voice brings the smile back to Sylvain’s face.
“I didn’t forget. I mean…I’ve been propositioned by couples before just usually like…” Sylvain’s a smooth talker but one of his tells is that he moves his hands a lot when he’s nervous. Right now, he’s pressing his index fingers together, implying being spitroasted. “...but like… at once . There’s usually restraints involved and a contract. And a safeword.”
“All in due time.” Dedue replies. He stands to his feet and offers his hand to Sylvain who takes it and stands like a noblewoman retiring to her room for the night. “Ashe is better with knots than I am anyway.”
“I’m just used to arrangements like these being kinda…rough. You know? We Gautiers thrive off of violence. Knock me around a little. Call me names all that.” Sylvain doesn’t feel shame. So the blush spreading across his cheeks must be born of trepidation. “It helps…” He scratches the back of his neck, bashfully casting his eyes to the floor. He doesn’t look up until he feels Dedue’s chest against his back.
Surprised, he turns, but doesn’t back away. Dedue is nearly a whole head taller than him. At 6’1”, he’s often the tallest person in the room and he only gets stockier with age. Big body, big personality, big ego: everywhere he goes, he stands out. Yet, standing chest to chest with Dedue makes him feel so small . Dedue Moliaro is a monument to everything that makes a hero. He’s more mountain than man but even the evergreen peaks of Faerghus can’t match Dedue’s rich green eyes. They shine in the firelight billowing from the hearth and for a moment they’re all Sylvain can see.
“To be treated roughly, you must first learn to be treated gently.” Dedue’s unshakable baritone reduces Sylvain knees to jelly and he almost drops to his knees without even being asked. But Dedue, cups his face. Their calluses are almost identical but with Dedue’s tenderness, Sylvain barely feels them. “No, no. Not yet.” The other man’s gentle smile makes his mouth dry.
Sylvain bites his lip as he watches Dedue remove his shirt. Goddess, Ashe is right. Dedue is the sexiest man in Fodlan. His glorious dark skin, rippling muscles…fuck, even his scars are sexy. Especially his scars. When he lets his hair down, Sylvain can’t help himself and runs his fingers through his silvery hair. Can you really be a silver fox at 30? He doesn’t have time to ponder it because Dedue presses a chaste kiss to Sylvain’s forehead.
“There aren’t many rules this time. I only ask that you’re vocal with me.” Dedue asks. Sylvain wonders if someone can die from too much intense eye contact. “Sylvain?”
“Yeah.” Sylvain blurts out, shaking his head a little. “Ashe told me that you like it when he’s specific .” Dedue chuckles.
“Specificity is important. Expressions of pleasure are just as important as expressions of discomfort. You need to tell me what you’re feeling.”
Sylvain just nods dumbly. Expressions of pleasure? He doesn’t know what to say to that. He expresses plenty during sex. If Dedue is the dominant in this situation. He just needs to tell him what he’s going to do and Sylvain just needs to take it. The dominant gets satisfied and he gets distracted. What more is there to express?
But of course, Dedue isn’t the kind of man who throws people away. On the contrary, he goes the extra mile to give everyone who speaks to him with respect the same courtesy. Ashe is much the same way. They’re the kind of people who always make you feel welcome. They’re too good to treat him the way he’s treated women from the time he was 15. Dedue and Ashe suffered the worst life has to offer and they still found in their hearts to be kind whereas he - the spoiled noble - spent nearly half his life stewing in bitterness. His father was right.
“...Sylvain…”
“Huh? What? I was listening.”
“No, you weren’t. You were spiralling.” Dedue says. Sylvain’s heart shrivels up as Dedue sighs and pulls his shirt back on. “Perhaps we should do this another day. You’re…”
“No!” Sylvain surprises himself with his vehemence. He yanks his hand back when he realizes he has a fistful of Dedue’s shirt. He clears his throat and repeats, “No…I want this…really I do. I just…this isn’t what I’m used to. It’s not what I’m meant for.”
“You’re meant to enjoy it.” Dedue tries to act like he didn’t just get a terrifying glimpse into Sylvain’s psyche.
“I do enjoy it!” Sylvain waves his hands like he might erase the words he just said. “It’s just…new to me is all.” Dedue can’t help but feel a little sad. He gave up trying to fix broken Fodlani Boys when he resigned his position as Dimitri’s advisor but Sylvain is different. The new Margrave has spent so long hiding behind a mask, he doesn’t even know what he is without it. It’s pathetic in an endearing sort of way. He’ll do what he can to help but Sylvain has to fix himself. All he can do is help him relax.
“Here. Turn around.” He says. Sylvain hesitates but shrugs and does as he’s asked. Dedue slowly begins kneading his shoulders. “You are wound tighter than a bow string.”
“Honestly, I came straight here after I met with Dimitri.” Sylvain replies quietly.
“I was wondering how you made it to Duscur in such a short time. I thought perhaps I simply had the wrong date.” Dedue presses a bit harder as he travels down Sylvain’s back. “You shouldn’t push yourself like that.”
“Can’t always be lazy, now can I?” Sylvain quips. He groans as his shoulder loosens. He lets his eyes slide shut. He hisses a little when Dedue squeezes his shoulder a little too hard.
“Apologies, Ashe is much better at this than I am.” Dedue gets a breathy chuckle in response.
“If that’s true, he will absolutely just put me to sleep.” Sylvain says. “Seriously, you’ll never get rid of me.”
“I consider that a good thing.” Whether it’s Dedue’s husky voice or what he just said, Sylvain shivers. He presses his back against the man’s chest and Dedue wraps his arms around his waist. The shivers intensify as Dedue’s lips trail down his neck. First, he peppers him with soft kisses, then nibbles until he’s leaving marks down to shoulders. Sylvain’s head falls back onto Dedue’s shoulder a little breathless. They lock eyes for a moment and Sylvain gives a slow and deliberate nod.
With that consent, Dedue kisses him with a fervor that nearly makes him fall back. This isn’t the first time they kissed, but it’s the first time without Ashe present. It’s a little weird, honestly. Even if this was Ashe’s idea in the first place, he feels like a homewrecker. It wouldn’t be the first time. Dedue’s tongue keeps him occupied while the man’s hands slip past his waist.
Sylvain’s cock jumps at the first sign of contact. Shit, am I that desperate? He asks himself as Dedue bites his lower lip. The kisses leave him wanting and every time Dedue pulls away so he chases them down. The way the taller man smiles against his lips makes his heart flutter but the way he’s grinding against his ass makes something else flutter too . The girth of Dedue’s half mast erection digs into the curve of his ass. His hand slips up his shirt and flirts with his nipples. Goddess, how did he find his weak spot so soon? In a fit of impulsivity, Sylvain whips around and throws his arms around Dedue’s neck. He’s never had to stand on his toes to kiss someone before. It’s nice. It makes him feel like he could reclaim his misspent youth.
He doesn’t realize they’ve been stumbling back until the back of his knees hit the bed. He sits down fully prepared to deepthroat Dedue’s large cock that’s reaching out to him through the man’s breeches. He licks his lips and palms the other man’s erection hungrily. However, Dedue grabs his wrist, stopping him. For a moment, Sylvain’s heart seizes in fear, even though he doesn’t quite know why.
“There will be plenty of time for that soon.” Dedue’s warm tone instantly relaxes him. “This is about you.” He takes Sylvain’s face in his hands and delights in watching the man’s eyes dilate with anticipation. “Undress.”
Feeling a little foolish, Sylvain stands back up and disrobes under Dedue’s watchful eye. Sylvain is quite proud of his body even though he’s barely maintained his physique. He carries the extra weight well though and he’s not ashamed of it. It’s the scars he’s worried about. He used to joke that women love scars, that they make a man look rugged. But once it gets cold, it just makes him ache and creak like an old man. Most of his trysts these days politely ask him to put his shirt back on once they see them. However, Dedue was there when Claude dragged him out of that fire. He knows what to expect.
There’s no sexy way to remove pants, especially ones as fitted as Sylvain’s. Especially if you’re wearing boots but Dedue’s telling smirk makes him feel like less of a fool. To his credit, he only stumbles once and turns to fold them gently on Dedue’s arm chair. He hears a deep chuckle behind him.
“What?” Sylvain asks coyly.
“Nothing, just enjoying the view. I’ve always admired your ass in those riding breeches. But I think I prefer it bare.” Dedue hardly ever teases back and it makes Sylvain positively giddy. “Come here.” It dully occurs to him as Dedue never took his shirt back off. So he’s naked while Dedue is still fully clothed. Quite thrilling, honestly. He fights back the urge to ask the man to bend him over and smack his ass until he can’t sit down. Instead, Dedue gently strokes his lip with his thumb and gives him another innocent kiss. Sylvain practically swoons. He’s bare erection rubs against Dedue’s clothed cock and he shudders. Dedue takes him by his waist, devouring his swollen lips a second time. Heat rises all around them as Sylvain buries his hands in hair and ruts against the other man’s thigh like a wanton whore. Dedue lets out a growl that travels down his spine and into his cock. “Get on the bed. Use the pillows. I want you to watch.” Sylvain doesn’t hesitate this time. “You take orders well. Ashe will be pleased.”
Dedue’s smirk turns hungry. He joins Sylvain on the bed, kneeling in front of him. Sylvain lets the man spread his legs and slip between them. Dedue nibbles his neck, leaving a few more little marks. Ashe told him that he likes to leave marks that only he can see. That didn’t sit well with him at first but now he hopes he’ll have some on his thighs by the end of this. Dedue leaves a trail of burning kisses down to his chest where he starts lavishing Sylvain’s nipples with attention. Sylvain jerks and gasps. He pants as jolts of pleasure arch his back. Dedue gently bites his left nub and he lets out a yelp. Sylvain feels heat rise in his face. Why is he blushing? He’s naked in the arms of another man and now he has the audacity to be embarrassed? Dedue slowly strokes his cock and he claps a hand over his mouth before another one of those high pitched yips leave his mouth.
He feels Dedue stop before he sees the man staring at him with the most intense expression he’s ever seen. Slowly, he takes Sylvain’s hand and places it gently back down.
“Don’t cover your mouth.” Dedue commands. “I told you. I need to hear you. I want to know that you like it, no matter how it sounds.” Struck silent, Sylvain nods wordlessly. Dedue instantly tests his willpower by slipping his cock into his mouth. He grips the sheets and fights the urge to bite his lip. Dedue slides his tongue up and down all nine inches of his erection and he still wants to fight the moans building at the back of his throat. Is it really so hard to enjoy it?
“Don’t…don’t you want to get me ready before I cum?” Sylvain doesn’t like how high his voice is.
“Don’t worry about that. You’re going to cum more than once.” Dedue winks and immediately goes back to sucking his cock. An inhuman sound crawls out of Sylvain’s throat. Or perhaps it’s the most human thing he’s ever done. “More.” Dedue demands with his mouth full. Between Sylvain’s pants little moans come crawling out without his permission. He’s the sub, why is he fighting control? That’s not what he’s meant for. “Don’t fight it.” Dedue coaxes. The sound of his voice tears at Sylvain’s restraint. He nearly loses it when Dedue starts stroking and sucking in tandem. Goddess, he can’t already be this close, can he? It’s like Dedue is trying to suck his soul out of his dick. He swears he can feel the pleasure spreading into his bones.
Sylvain has two kinds of body counts. Both of them have taught him that he must adapt and be whatever is needed to accomplish the end goal. But what if the end goal here? Dedue isn’t pursuing his own pleasure, because his heavy cock hangs untouched between his thighs. While Sylvain is breathing so hard he’s practically convulsing. This is different from any sexual encounter in recent memory. Pressure builds in his hips. He would’ve bucked up if Dedue wasn’t holding his hips down. He hopes to The Goddess that he’ll bruise. He wants it to hurt. He needs it. If there’s no pain, there’s nothing to focus on and all he has left is himself and that leaves him…
“Ahhh!”
…vulnerable .
He barely catches the sound of his screaming voice bouncing off the walls. Dedue sucks him through his orgasm and his head spins. He’s sweating and trembling. He feels absolutely boneless. He’s certain he was heard all the way to Fhirdiad. Post Nut Clarity forces him to reconcile the fact that Dedue made him scream from a simple blow job. God, he’s a repressed wreck of a man.
“Holy shit.” Sylvain mutters as Dedue stands to spit. The larger man is awfully proud of himself as he wipes the remaining stream of cum from his lips. “We’re gonna do that more than once?” Dedue’s smile vanishes.
“Do you want to stop?” He asks with the utmost seriousness.
“No!” Sylvain yelps. “That’s just never happened that loudly before.” That beautiful smile is back and Dedue takes his arms, pulling him into a sitting position on the side of the bed.
“That’s nothing to be ashamed of. It’s just what I wanted from you. I need to know that you enjoy it.” Dedue drops one of his arms and moves the waist of his pants down. Sylvain lets his erection hit him in the face. Goddess, he’s so big. He just came and he already wants it inside him. “So you ought to make some noise when you’re accepting your reward.” Sylvain gives his lover’s cock a long, languid lick just like Dedue did for him. “Remember, your goal isn’t to make me cum, I simply want to be at my best when I fuck you.”
Sylvain could totally make him cum though. He wants to choke on this cock. He could give him the wettest, sloppiest fellatio he could imagine. But as he looks at Dedue’s approving, gentle smile, he continues with his slow pace. This is his reward. He should savor it. Dedue lets out a rumbling groan and runs his hand through his hair, holding his head steady.
“Good boy.”
Those two words open Sylvain’s throat and with a loud, wet gulp he buries his nose in Dedue’s pale pubic hair. Dedue moans and hisses. With those flushed, full lips, Sylvain’s mouth is made to be fucked. His tongue almost has a mind of its own. It almost makes him forget why he’s here. Sylvain has to cope with tenderness before Ashe gets a hold of him. He guides Sylvain off of his dick and the margrave lets out a loud gasp. Eyes glazed and breathless Sylvain is a vision of submission. He goes to swallow his dick once more but Dedue cannot handle that more than once if he wants to last more than two thrusts.
“Stop.” He says. Sylvain is confused for a moment until he says, “Get on your hands and knees.” Dedue turns to grab the lubricant he prepared for the occasion by the time he turns around, Sylvain’s ass is already in the air. The pillows, however, are in the wrong place. Dedue pulls them from under Sylvain’s head and fixes them under his raised hips. “Comfortable?” He asks.
“Um…yeah.” Sylvain stammers. This kind of comfort hadn’t even crossed his mind.
Ashe doesn’t like spankings that much, but Dedue loves to give them. Dedue can’t resist giving Sylvain’s gloriously plump ass a good smack. His cheeks are almost bigger than his hand. Sylvain jolts with a whine and he makes a note, fighting the urge to do it again just to see if he’ll say “thank you, sir may I have another”. He pours the lube over his fingers. He uses his long middle finger first, pressing it into Sylvain’s waiting hole.
Sylvain tenses up as Dedue pushes into his last knuckle. He wants to bite the pillow and tell him to hurry up and fuck him, but he’s getting a better idea of what he wants now. Whether it’s cooking or gardening, Dedue takes his time with everything. He pays attention to all the details. He feels him searching as that finger thrusts back and forth inside him. The lube warms his insides gently or maybe it’s the friction. Whatever it is, his half mast cock buries itself into the pillows. Dedue bends over him and whispers into his ear.
“How does it feel?”
“Don’t stop…” Sylvain pleads. Dedue has no plans to, of course. He just wants to hear it from Sylvain. He curls his finger ever so slightly and… “There!” Sylvain whines lustfully. He’s trying to be quiet again. That simply won’t do. He adds a second finger and Sylvain pushes into his fingers. He might talk a big game but he really is quite needy.
Slowly, Dedue works him open. He doesn’t tease often. That’s more Ashe’s domain. Nevertheless, his husband isn’t the only one with a devious streak. He fondles Sylvain’s hotspot until he’s breathless. Sylvain hole is tight and twitching but he won’tfuck him until until he hears it from Sylvain. So he stops.
Precum leaks from Sylvain’s needy cock. He’s practically fucking the pillows. He needs to be touched so badly. He wants Dedue’s cock inside him. Why is he waiting so long ? Sylvain glances back and sees nothing but placid expectation on the man’s face. Oh. Right. He wants to hear him. But what does he want him to say? Or does he want to say anything? Sex is not the time for uncertainty. So Sylvain relies on what he knows.
“Please.” He breathes trying to push back into Dedue’s fingers again. “Dedue…” That knowing chuckle behind tells him all he needs to know and he finds himself whining. “I need it…please.”
“Need what?” Dedue is rarely so mischievous but he gave Sylvain one rule and he needs to obey it even if he has to be coaxed into it.
“I need…I need you to fuck me.” Sylvain begs into the mattress. He looks back at Dedue but all he sees is a raised, waiting eyebrow and maybe a hint of confusion. He’s not loud enough. “Your fingers aren’t enough, I can’t…” He lifts his head up. “Please…fuck me. Fuck me.” Dedue slowly pulls his fingers out and grabs his ass, spreading his cheeks. As if goading his on, the other man presses his cock into the cleft of his ass. The tip presses gently against his hole but won’t go in. He whines again. He doesn’t want to be teased and Dedue is clear struggling to restrain himself. He wants to be stuffed full and fucked until his mind goes blank. He wants this man to bend him in half and take what he wants from him.
Oh.
Perhaps he should just say that out loud .
“C’mon Dedue.” Sylvain moans. “Fuck me. Fuck me like you hate me. Like you own me. I want your cock inside me. I need it, please . I’ve wanted it for so long…” He doesn’t know if he meant to say that part but it’s the truth. “...do whatever you want to me, I just…AHHHH!”
Dedue thrusts inside balls deep without saying another word. Sylvain doesn’t have time to stifle his shouting. His hole stretches and burns around Dedue’s cock and it feels so good . His toes curl. He throws his head back. His body shudders. Dedue only gives him a precious moment to adjust before setting a steady but deep pace.
“Do not…hah…put your face back into that mattress.” Dedue growls. All Sylvain can do is nod before a loud moan rips itself out his chest - not his throat - as Dedue gives him another deep thrust. “That’s it. Let me hear you…” Sylvain’s moans come from a primal place deep inside him. “Do you want me…yes…to tell you…hff…how good you feel?”
“ Please .” Sylvain begs. He wants to hear it. He wants to be good. He wants to be so good for him because holy shit Dedue cock is euphoric .
“You’re so tight…and hot…” Dedue growls. “You’re the perfect bottom, so sweet and obedient.” He lays a hard smack to Sylvain’s ass and the other man yelps a loud “yes!”. “When we’re done with you…” He thrusts so hard Sylvain’s flesh smacks against his. “You won’t want anyone else. There won’t be anyone else.” The soft “plap plap” of skin on skin fills the room. “...because we’ll never be done with you. You’re ours.” Sylvain’s hands blindly grab for his as he gazes back at him pleadingly. His voice is getting raw now. He wants more. He can tell. “You’re so good for me…Are you ready for your reward?” Sylvain nods rapidly.
“More…” He drools into the sheets.
Dedue roughly flips him over, knocking the pillows to the floor. He folds him in half, throwing his knees over his shoulders. With his feet in the air, Sylvain can’t even cross his ankles. Sylvain laughs deliriously. His back might be against the bed but he feels like he’s free falling. But Dedue holds him steady. He’s covering him, almost like he’s protecting him. He kisses him sloppily and spares him an absolutely wicked smile before drilling into him.
That slow, tender pace has been replaced with something brutal and relentless just like Sylvain likes it. He doesn’t bother holding back this time. He just holds on for dear life and throws his head back.
“Fuck…I…It’s so good…!” He cries. He shouts when Dedue marks his neck with a bite. He moans into each kiss. “So deep…! So good…!”
“Yes…yes….Sylvain.” Dedue’s encouragement robs him of coherent speech. “I’m close…I’m cumming inside you…”
“Yes! Please! Fill me up! I’m! So! close…!” Words leave Sylvain after that. Dedue’s hammering cock reaches the deepest parts of him, bringing pleasure he forgot existed. A storm rages inside his loins. As soon as Dedue’s hot seed fills his wanton hole, a clap of thunder rips through his body and he screams out his orgasm. He spills all over his chest and Dedue spills inside him, thrusting slowly until his deluge stops.
Sylvain has never come untouched before. It’s so intense that he’s not sure he wants to do it again. He’s lightheaded. Tired, even. He’s not even clean yet and Dedue holds him close, stroking his hair gently. His eyes droop dangerously. The edges of his vision gray. It’s a little too warm in here. Maybe it’s the fire. Maybe it’s Dedue furnace-like body. Either way, he’s too well fucked to stay conscious.
“I’m…”
“It’s okay…” Dedue murmurs. “Let it happen. I’ll be right here when you wake.”
Sylvain has promised so many lovers that exact same thing only to abandon them at the first sign of unconsciousness. As his eyes flutter shut, he looks up at Dedue’s gentle smile and it feels like permission. He doesn’t know what to do with it. Permission often comes with expectation but Dedue just stays there, watching him fall asleep. So he lets go and lets his eyes flutter shut one last time to the sound of the door opening.
When he blinks again, several minutes later, he’s looking up at Ashe, not Dedue. The smaller man isn’t wearing much under his cotton dressing gown but he’s had the time to let Sylvain’s head rest in his lap. Dedue is on the other side of the room, wringing out a cloth into a steaming basin. Sylvain blinks again and realizes that he’s bruised, but clean of all the cum both inside and out.
“Sounds like you enjoyed yourself.” Ashe is always more chipper than he ought to be.
“Was I that loud?” Sylvain asks blearily. Ashe and Dedue trade glances and chuckle.
“You could’ve been louder.” Ashe pets his hair like he can’t wait to pull it. “Don’t worry, I’ll see to that.” It doesn’t sound like a threat but a shiver goes down his back regardless.
“I guess you’re headed to bed then?” Sylvain tries to sit up but Ashe’s insistent stroking of his hair makes it difficult to get up. “Shouldn’t I…go?” Ashe stops combing his hair. Dedue hangs the cloth on the bedside table.
“Nonsense.” Ashe chides. “We need to take care of you, Sylvain.”
“But…”
“No buts.” Dedue replies a bit sharper than he meant to. Honestly, he’s a bit hurt that Sylvain assumes they would just kick him out. He hands Sylvain a glass of water and the latter stares at it before drinking tentatively. Almost like he can’t believe it’s happening.
For a moment, everything is quiet. Ashe goes back to combing through his hair. Dedue joins them on the bed once he finishes drinking his water. Sylvain’s voice is tired but not enough to affect his voice. He just feels like jelly. Even if he did have to go back to his room tonight, he doesn’t know if he’d make it without falling on his face. Nothing is worse than a Walk of Shame with shaking legs. Anyone who catches you smells the submission on you. A lot of people often mistake it for weakness.
“Sylvain?” Dedue asks. “How do you feel?”
Sylvain opens his mouth to respond but can’t for a moment. Looking between the couple, he finds himself truly at a loss. Sylvain often sticks his foot in his mouth but he’s rarely ever speechless. He’s been propositioned by couples before. Usually they expect him to be the spice they need to put their relationship back together. He’s never enough so he leaves to the sound of them arguing. This isn’t the first time he’s played the submissive. He’s usually bound, gagged or blindfolded and used as a conduit for some dominant’s rage. He doesn’t mind it, really. It feels like all the lovers he left in his wake are finally getting their revenge. Deep down, he knows he deserves it.
But in the Ubert-Molinaro household, he’s treated like a part of their family. He never had much of one himself. Even if they did accept him, he wouldn’t be good at it. Then again, no one ever expects him to be good at anything. He spent most of his life carefully cultivating that hapless image. He’s not used to being looked after. Sex is never gentle. He’s supposed to feel numb afterward.
With Ashe and Dedue at either side, he feels incidental soreness and the whispers of pleasure through his body. But most of all he feels warm. There’s no lonely walk back to his inn but the gentle heat of a carefully tended fireplace. Bruises are treated with salve instead of rubbing against his riding breeches. He’s not wearing yesterday’s clothes, but one of Dedue’s spare shirts that smells like the spice and pine trees of Duscur. It’s too big. Things are rarely ever big on him. Since it’s a nightshirt, it’s probably even big on Dedue so he’s practically swimming in it. Everything about this house makes him feel so small. Its warm fire and even warmer inhabitants. Ashe and Dedue don’t expect anything else from him but to rest.
“Sylvain? Are you okay?”
At first, he can’t come up with a word for how he feels. Looking into their concerned faces, he searches for judgement and can’t find it. He’s used to judgement. He knows how to respond to it. Ingrid judges him, even Felix does. He doesn’t blame them. He caused them so much trouble in the past. He’s exposed. Vulnerable. He can’t just slip his mask on to pretend like nothing’s wrong. They’ve already seen it. He doesn’t know what he is without the it but for the first time in his entire life, he’s okay with that. Ashe and Dedue glance at each other knowingly as he tries to subtly brush away a very overwhelmed tear.
“I…yeah…I just...feel safe here is all.”