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When they had broken the news to them that Emily had not made it, everybody was devastated. Not only was a team member gone, but one of their closest and best friends, a part of their family. The rest of them had gone home but he had stayed at the hospital because “there is paperwork that needs to be done“. Only JJ could have known he wanted to see her one last time before she needed to leave. When he came back into her room, even though she was incredibly exhausted, she was still awake. And part of him was glad she was.
“The others just left,“ he said softly. She didn’t say anything in return, just nodded quietly trying to hold the tears back that were already starting to form in her eyes. He sat down beside her on the bed, not caring if that crossed some line or not. What if Emily wanted to stay in Paris? Or wanted to move on from them? What if he never saw her again? What if…
“Aaron?“ she asked, breaking him out of his thoughts, her voice barely above a whisper. At the rare mention of his first name, he turned to face her and looked at her properly. It was only then that she saw the tears that were threatening to spill from his eyes, too.
He deeply inhaled a shaky breath and looked at the ceiling before carefully taking her hand in his. “I almost lost you. For good this time.“ He sounded so, dare she say, broken? She had never seen him so emotional, so raw, especially towards her. “Where was I when you needed me?“ She reached out to wipe one stray tear from his face before cupping his left cheek in her hand and pretended not to notice the way he leaned into her touch.
“Hey, this is not your fault,“ she reminded him softly, trying her hardest not to let her tears burst out just yet. “You couldn’t have known. I should have told you. I know should have. But I was just so scared about what he would do to you. To all of you. I know him and what he’s capable of. I couldn’t let anything happen to the team. I just couldn’t risk it.“
“I know, I know. You had no choice. I probably would have done the same thing. It’s just- I wish it didn’t have to be this way. I don’t-“ Ah, there it was. He had to choose his words carefully – that’s what he had always told himself. Now, though, after everything that had happened, he figured he didn’t care anymore.
She should know what it is he’s feeling towards her before he would never see her again.
There was a short silence between them before he spoke again. “I don’t want you to leave, Emily. I know it’s the only way to keep you safe, and I want nothing more than that, believe me. I just wish the only way to ensure your safety wasn’t for you to be leaving. We’ll all miss you so much, especially Jack and I.“ He looked into her teary eyes and she searched desperately for some kind of lie in his eyes, but she couldn’t find one. She only saw that he meant every single word of what he had just said. That was all it took for the tears to start falling.
She was exhausted, scared. Surprised by his openness, overwhelmed. She felt a whole lot of emotions. But she also felt hopeful and determined. Hopeful that she wouldn’t have to stay hidden in Paris for too long and could come back soon. Determined to catch Doyle and take him down when the time was right. She wasn’t exactly sure how she was going to do it yet, but the thought of Aaron certainly was of help – and that was probably the only thing she was sure about.
“I’ll miss you, too. So much,“ she whispered and with the hand still occupying his cheek pulled him closer towards her, so their foreheads rested against each other. He cautiously held her as they both allowed their eyes to close, savoring every little detail of that moment. It was then that he, again, thought about what else needed to be said before it would be too late, the thought of having to let her go not sitting right with him. Even if it would only be temporarily.
After what felt like both, a lifetime and just a fraction of a second, he pulled back slightly to press a kiss to her forehead before leaning his forehead against hers again. “Thank you.“ It came out as a whisper, afraid that any word leaving his mouth would somehow drag her from him.
He felt the frown that was forming on her forehead the second he had said it. “What for?“ Now it was her who sounded so sad, so broken, and it made his heart ache. He wanted to take all of her pain away from her and see her smile. That gorgeous smile he fell for and made his heart flutter every time.
“For being there for me, for us, when Haley died and I sent everyone else away and refused any help. For always caring and being there for us when we needed you the most.“ He cracked a tiny smile as pictures of Emily and Jack crossed his mind. They had played superheroes for many hours in a row if that was what Jack wanted and had watched movies together, even watching the same one more than once a day. She was always there for Jack, no matter who he needed her to be, but never crossed a line, as well. “I never thanked you for it, but there is a good chance we wouldn’t have made it the way we have without you. Thank you, Emily. For everything.“ His voice was barely above a whisper, his heart jumping.
Emily pulled back slightly to look at him and then wrapped her arms around him the best way she could. She hid her face in the crook of his neck and as he felt a fresh set of tears burning into his skin, he could hear her mumbled “Always“. She was full on sobbing then, holding onto him as if she was about to drown and he was her only lifesaver. And then, he cried, too. They cried as if it would prevent time from going by, as if it would simply solve all of their problems and they could be happy from one second to the other.
To Emily, it felt too close like goodbye. Like they would never see each other ever again. In an attempt to even out her breathing she slowly took a deep breath, his scent immediately calming her.
“Please don’t let this be the end of our story.“
She didn’t want it to end the way she felt it was about to.
“It’s only just begun.“