Work Text:
A Life Once Loved
In retrospect, Youichi can clearly see the moments that made him fall for Kazuya.
The moments his stomach fluttered with every pat to the back,
The warm feeling in his chest with every shared smile,
The overwhelming beat of his heart as his eyes would search for the catcher after every win.
Yes, in retrospect it’s quite apparent the moments where Youichi fell for Kazuya.
Kazuya, whose eyes lit up with passion as he shouted,
“We are not kings, we are challengers!”
Kazuya, who spoke in biting remarks and arrogant smirks.
Kazuya, who confided in Youichi that he had no fucking idea what he was doing as a captain, terror overtaking passion as he whispered, “Youichi I’m scared”
The unkempt inferno within him roared to life with every moment of vulnerability Kazuya entrusted to him,
Enthralled with being the one who got to hold them, unaware of the price he’d pay.
With every piece Kazuya handed over, Youichi paid for with his heart, his love.
So Youichi loved, he loved Kazuya with all he had.
He walked unflinchingly into the unbearable heat,
Ignorant to the way his arms would blister as he tried to the catcher,
Uncaring of the burning tear tracks on his face as he tried to wipe the other’s
It wasn’t until he was left with nothing but a blackened heart, charred beyond recognition, that he realized just what kind of hell he’d brought upon himself.
It was too late.
He sits back now, staring at his scorched heart, and laughs to himself,
“So this is what it means to be in love.”
Youichi had given away his heart to the person who would never give his back in return.
And he couldn’t do a damn thing about it.
It was with this realization,
The realization that he had been engulfed by the inferno, that Youichi mourned.
He mourned for the life he lost before every facet of his life had been imbued with Kazuya.
He mourned for the heart he once had, one that didn't know the disease of unrequited love.
He sat in this swarming wildfire and screamed,
He wailed in anger at the unfairness of it all.
He cried endless tears because he knew,
For all the love Kazuya had for him, it wasn’t the love that would soothe the burns on his heart.
Eventually, Youichi makes peace with it.
The anguishing feelings and bitter rhetoric of “Why me, why him?” subside.
Weeks, months, years later, he’s not sure.
All he knows is that now, he looks at his still blackened heart and thinks of a life once loved.