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i
“You’re going after him.”
Alluka asked him once he came down stairs. It’s not a question and they both know it. “Sorry.”
“Don’t be, Killua. I know he makes you happy, and you deserve to be happy.”
——
ii
From when Gon left, Killua visited Aunt Mito often. It wasn’t an exaggeration to say he went every day for at least an hour or two. He wanted to make sure she was ok and well; and she was, but Killua knew she already could tell Killua planned to go after Gon. He could tell in her voice, in the way she talks about him and Gon, in the way she talks on love and the stars. Killua doesn’t hide it either, telling her a few weeks after Gon left.
She wasn’t too glad about it, however she was supportive like he knew she would be. Mito treated him more similar to a son than Killua’s own parents, and he cared for her as one. He couldn’t lie, he felt guilty but he wouldn’t change his mind.
When it came to him trying to find a place for Alluka to be safe and happy, he never considered letting her stay with Mito. He didn’t want to leave her someone to take care of, it felt mean. But he was at a loss about three months into figuring this out.
He had walked home to Gon’s house to see Mito. It was like he’d done before when Gon was here, and it made him cry a little every time. Now his eyes just watered— like they did now. When he walked in, Mito was sitting in an armchair in the living room, which was to the right of the door, making a scarf in green and blue.
“Still knitting that scarf? Who’s it for anyway?”
She smiled and looked up at him. “I’ll tell you when I finish, how about that?” Killua smiled back at her. The familiarity between him and Mito had grown to that of family, like she was his aunt as much as Gon’s.
“Fair enough.” He said as he put his stuff down. Killua brushed his bangs from his eyes and walked to the couch, he’d decided to ask Mito as soon as he could so he sat down at the couch. “Mito, can I ask you about something?”
“Is it about space?” She said it surprisingly calmly, no hint of distress or lack of support or interest. She and Gon both knew how to move forward, something Killua needed work in, in his opinion.
“It’s about Alluka.” He leaned forward as he spoke, antsy about his predicament. “She’s my sister and she’s stuck in my family house with no hope to leave if I don’t do something. I want to go to Gon as soon as possible, but I have to figure out how to ensure Alluka’s happiness before I leave. I can’t leave her there. Problem is—” Killua ran his hands through his hair, leaving his head down in his hands and his fingers staying in his hair. “I’m at a loss. I don’t know what to do, at this rate I’ll be thirty by the time I can go after Gon, and who knows how long it’ll take for me to find him out in space!”
“I‘ll watch her.” Mito said, and Killua’s anxiety from not seeing Gon for so long already and having that last for fourteen years just vanished from his body like the nerves after telling a confession that’s reciprocated. It just vanished and he’s left dumbfounded.
“A-are you sure? I don’t want to leave you with her if it’s gonna be trouble—” and he was cut off with a laugh from Mito. Gon’s great grandma walked into the kitchen as they continued to talk.
She calmed down after a while, though not completely tranquil. “I took care of Gon for sixteen years, Killua. Taking care of your sister would be an honor. Could I?”
And Killua had his plan. He explained it quickly as it flowed in his mind to Mito: once Alluka is eighteen, they run here. She’ll be an adult so she won’t be able to be forced away from where she wants to go, and Killua will be there. Hell, his parents may not care at that point since they only hide her out of an embarrassment they should feel about themselves. Since Alluka will be eighteen there will be no authority left for them. Not only that, but Mito will be here for her while Killua is with Gon. Mito agreed with the plan, even encouraged him. Despite his happiness at a plan to help his sister, he was still wishing Gon were here. He’d’ve liked the plan, right?
——
iii
Killua decided not to leave until he got Alluka and his situation sorted, which was surprisingly a lot easier when it was his main goal before leaving to find Gon. It took a few years, but he did it all thanks to Gon’s Aunt Mito. Now he could focus on going after Gon.
——
iv
It’s when he separates his accounts that his family can tell something is wrong. Not when he asks for over a hundred million dollars. Not when it’s gone in a matter of minutes, but when he separates his account from then on. He had to if he was going to give it to Alluka, so he did.
In it was enough money to last lifetimes. Killua made sure he spilled all his savings in as well, well over a hundred million left over from his years of large allowances he rarely spent. He had well over a billion in it at first, but he used it all to buy the spaceship to go after Gon. The hundred million was for Alluka, Mito, and Abe. A last present before he left. He thought he’d be clear to go into the unknown, to leave and go after his boyfriend. But there were a few hurdles left he hadn’t expected.
——
v
He didn’t expect to be road blocked by the association.
“You can’t go into deep space.” Dr. Cheadle Yorkshire had told him. She was the head of the association. They were sitting in her office, Killua in a wooden chair.
“Why not?” Killua asked, a little whine seeping through. She heard of his purchase of a spaceship strong enough to reach deep space, big enough for Killua to live in and more than suited for him to leave. All he needed was to the launch pad the association had so he could leave. However, he was being blocked by them. He could spend the money and build his own launch pad, but that’d take years. Killua wanted to leave as soon as possible so making his own should only be a last resort.
“We can’t just let any person go into deep space. You understand, don’t you?” She didn’t seem like she wanted to have this conversation. Killua could relate, he just wanted to go see Gon.
Killua leans forward in his chair. “What would it take for you to let me? I want to go be with Gon. I don’t care how, just as soon as you can let me. Preferably this year.”
“You’d have to pass our tests.”
“Tell me everything I need to do and I’ll do it.”
“We’ll have to take over command of your ship.”
“As long as I go where Gon’s going, I don’t care.”
“You’ll only be able to go with one other person, we can’t have too big of a crew. Plus you’ll have to find some part to become an expert in and you won’t be the captain at any point, we can’t have dead weight.”
“That’s fine with me, as long as I go where Gon’s going.”
“You may never come back.”
“I know.”
“Mr. Zoldyck. Are you sure?”
“Would I have spent over a billion dollars on a spaceship if I weren’t?”
Dr. Yorkshire sighs, “Everything has to be done and paid for, will you be handling that? We don’t have the funding to sponsor another mission.”
“I can promise you I have enough.”
“And we’ll have to take credit for the funding as well, at least publicly.”
“I don’t care. As long as I can see Gon.”
She sighs again, pinching the bridge of her nose, “If you’ll do it by our rules, then fine. We’ll let you join Gon. But can you verify the route will be the same?”
“Gon had Ging’s notes, and I have Gon’s finished product. I can verify since they’re going the same way.”
Dr. Yorkshire smiled. “Let’s get started then.”
——
vi
Doing things by their rules apparently included the whole deal. Including interviews.
Overall, the process was quite smooth. Some interviews, some tests on knowledge, and then physical tests. During his interviews at nineteen— nearly twenty, Killua was always asked why he wanted to go out into space so young to sponsor it himself, to go beyond the already known, possibly to never come back, and Killua gave the same answer: “my boyfriend is out there, and I promised I’d go find him before he does something stupid.” He was told he reminded them a lot of a certain young boy who was talking about his father. That’s when Killua would always respond with “that’s him” and it won them all over.
——
vii
Killua was ready. He had easily passed the eligibility to go on as a navigator, as a hunter, and was ready to go. They could tell where Gon’s team was with very distant navigation tools they’ve used for decades, it was just a matter of people going out there, and Killua’s team of two was meant to give them back up per Killua’s request. By now, their technology had a need for an upgrade, materials for repairs they may not be able to make with what they had, and their team needed to be a bit bigger for the missions to go quicker so they could explore more planets even more thoroughly. That’s the on the books reason for the crew of two going to find Gon’s, and some of it is true. Their tech wasn’t that old and an upgrade, while nice, isn’t going to improve their performance so drastically that it’s a necessary journey. However, the ship they had was more than big enough to fit both crews comfortably, and the crew of Killua’s ship only had him and one other person since they were going to join the crew, not be a second one. The actual reason for this travel is Killua’s insistence on going with or without the association’s approval. And he now has that too.
——
viii
“You know,” Leorio started as he was dealing with the wires being put in Killua’s head, his head felt weird and his ears tingled a bit when a certain wire was connected. “You’re the third youngest person to be on a mission like this, into deep space, why’re you going past the Kuiper belt and the Oort Cloud? Don’t you know what’s there?”
“My boyfriend is out there, and I’m gonna go see him.” He gave the same answer every interview, Gon probably did the same thing with his stuff on his dad.
“You’re boyfriend, huh?” Leorio asked. Killua couldn’t help but watch the wires as they went in and out of his eyesight. His nerves kept feeling weird and tingly, but if he moved his head they may have to start all over, so he doesn’t move nor itch like he wants. Leorio takes a while til he asks “Gon Freecss?”
“That’s him.” Killua said. A certain wire must’ve connected because suddenly his fingers felt weird for a couple seconds then back to normal. He began to cross his eyes to look at the rest of the wires still hanging. This was really weird.
“He never mentioned a boyfriend.”
“We didn’t get together til he told me he was leaving. Even then, I got pissed at him before we were actually a couple.”
“And now you’re going to go deep space just to see him?”
“Yeah. I love him.” Killua blushed a little. “Why wouldn’t I go see him?”
Leorio continued his work silently for a while before continuing, “It’s a lot to leave everything for your boyfriend when you were sixteen.”
Killua scoffed, “My family is insane and wants to force me to take over a business I have no interest in. We were best friends since we were kids and the only people I care about know how much Gon misses me and how badly I miss him and are supporting me in every way they can. I even have an interest in space, so this may’ve been something I’d have considered if my family didn’t try to force me to take over the business all my life, not letting me think about any other avenue and if they didn’t hold my sister hostage in the house, doomed to unhappiness. I had to take care of that before I could go.” Killua spouted off. He may as well have written and memorized the schpeel at this point, he’d recited it so many times now. “Plus, I promised I’d go after him. And now I can.”
Leorio stopped and looked at him in the eyes, sighed, and continued his work with the wires. “You two are so insane.”
——
ix
Before Killua’s self sponsored expedition— on the books it says the hunter association sponsored it but whatever— leaves, Mito hands him two scarfs. One is blue with green patterns while the other is orange and white. They remind Killua of his and Gon’s old clothes, but mixed up.
“Mito…”
“I had no idea Gon was going, so I didn’t have anything to give him as a going away present. Could you take both? I’m sure you’ll both be sharing them anyway.”
Killua holds a tear in. His parents weren’t going to show, Alluka had given him the biggest hug ever, and Mito gave him a scarf. He couldn’t have asked for more. “Thanks.”
——
x
Killua would tell Gon he was coming if he could, but he couldn’t. So he told Mito, Abe, and Alluka he loved them. He told them he’d miss them and that he hopes they live long and happily way after he leaves home. And before he knows it, he’s on the ship that’s going to meet up with Gon’s. As he looks around in the shuttle, newer and faster and bigger than Gon’s, he knows he’ll see Gon soon.
——
xi
Gon and the crew have known of Killua’s journey and have been in communication for a while now. They had sent Killua the planet to head to so they could join up and had been in constant communication so everyone was soon on the same page. At first, once they were in range, messages would take a year to come and go. Then 6 months. Then 3 months. Then 1 month. Then a few weeks, then two weeks, and now it was near instant since they were almost to Gon, four years in space later.
He could thank their missions and research for the trip not being a decade. Research he’d more than happily do for the rest of his life, especially if Gon were there.
Killua sends a signal, “don’t tell Gon we’re here.” and Killua tells the rest of the crew about him and Gon. They agree not to tell him that they’d arrived.
——
xii
When Gon sees Killua, after 8 years of them being separated by the vastness of space, all he can do is cry. Cry that he’s here. That he’s ok. That they’re together again. His sleepless nights at the beginning and the yearning when he wasn’t working was gonna be filled. He hadn’t found Ging yet, they were exploring the planets they visited and taking their time, and Gon was so glad they were because it gave Killua time to get here. It made it so he could have a future he had given up on until Killua’s message at his launch, when he left Killua for the first and last time.
Gon’s joy is unparalleled when he hears his name called quietly in the distance, definitely a yell if he were closer, “GON!!!”
“KILLUA!!!” He yells back as he breaks off into a sprint. The planet, like most others they visit, is hospitable, so it’s as if they’re on earth when he sprints towards his best friend. Killua has always been faster, so it’s no surprise that he closes more of the gap than Gon does, the two twenty four year olds slamming into each other with tears down their cheeks and smiles on their face.
“I found you.” Killua says as he holds Gon from under his arms. Gon laughs as he holds Killua tighter. Tighter than he’d held someone in years as if Killua were one of his many dreams of the two being together again, desperate to not lose him like he always did when he woke up.
They don’t notice their team behind them, meeting up and talking about how they’re gonna merge all their information and how their stuff is gonna transfer over. They don’t hear the “awws” from some of their team members, nor the jealous rhetoric from others. All they can feel, hear, think about, all they know is the other is here. Gon hasn’t found Ging yet, but he’s found happiness in the form of his best friend and boyfriend he’s missed for 8 years. And while Ging was a goal, Killua was happiness, and them searching together was all Gon could ask for.