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“Babe, I’m just saying that they’re old enough to fuck off and do whatever they want while their folks are gone. When we were their age we never had a sitter that read fuckin’ bedtime stories and cuddled us all night,” Billy reasons, grumbling as he rips apart the third bag of popcorn he’s made so far for tonight’s movie night with the kids. He shoves the movie snack in the microwave and slams it, huffing more complaints under his breath about hating the children for not allowing him his one-on-one time with his girlfriend.
You’ve of course noticed by now this far in the relationship you’ve shared with Billy how high his temper can elevate to. Maybe it’s directed to someone else, such as his dad (whom infuriates him the most, and rightfully so). However, his anger has never taken a tole on you. Ever. Maybe there’s a sprinkle of a disagreement between the two of you here and there, but he’s proven himself more than worthy of your trust. Thick and thin, he has been outstanding at comforting you and never lashing out at you if he had a hard day.
With that being said, his relationship with the kids is a different story.
Billy blatantly shows his disapproval and not to mention distaste for Dustin and Lucas in particular, whom have shown interest in his little sister.
Nothing’s escalated to a full on fight before, he’s never stooped that low to throw hands on a kid. Although Billy vows to protect what’s his and he knows what goes through their heads, given that he was once their age and in awe of girls. So you could imagine the internal battle the teen is going to be fighting, having to sit pretty and stay calm for the sake of his girlfriend. Yes, he could have just skipped the ordeal entirely, maybe reschedule their date for when things could be a little more private. But when you offered that he could still come over while you babysit, with your goddamn puppy eyes and gentle pleas of desperation, fuck him if he can’t say no, alright?
Billy promised to be on his best behavior, but his patience has already worn thin and none of the kids have even arrived yet.
You sigh before sauntering over to where he stands, idly watching the transformation of the popping corn in the microwave with his hands on his hips. Turning his chin so that he meets your eyes, knowing that eye contact always seems to force him to snap out of it, you speak lowly in his ear.
“Listen, I get that they’re not your favorite to hang out with, but I promised you a little something if you play nice, didn’t I?” you pet his dirty blonde curls, another tactic for persuading Billy that you’ve learned. His pout fades a little, and he turns away before muttering a moody “Yeah, I guess so.”
“Hey, look at me. Billy,” you request, turning his head gently once more. His blue eyes meet yours.
“Things’ll be just fine. You’ll do great, I know it. Because I didn’t fall in love with an asshole, I fell in love with you.”
How the fuck is Billy supposed to argue that?
—
All at once, the kids come as promised at seven, riding their bikes to your garage. It’s Mike, Lucas, Dustin and Will that have been put under your wing for the night. Max has been on vacation to visit her side of the family, and El is spending her night watching Miami Vice with her dad. Steve wasn’t available either, working tonight at Family Video, which makes the perfect coincidence that you and Billy were to watch them together.
Dustin and Lucas were equally weary about Billy’s attendance at your movie night, shakey and worrisome about getting into it with your boyfriend. Will, however, could really care less. Billy never had any beef with him, probably because he never tried hitting on his sister.
“I’m just saying Lucas, it would’ve been a good idea if we brought protection! We know he won’t hesitate to fucking murder us, so we need to be prepared!” Dustin whisper-shouts, his anxiety clouding his proper judgement. Lucas rolls his eyes and pushed the curly haired boy’s shoulder, knowing how ridiculous and sensitive he can get. Yes, Billy scares him shitless too, but he has faith in Y/N to tame the wild beast.
“You guys are idiots. God, Dustin, just shut up already. He would’ve killed us a long time ago if he planned on it, he’s had like a hundred chances already,” Mike complains, thinking that that’s somehow going to serve as reassurance to his friends. Dustin’s eyes grew impossibly wider than they already were, and Lucas curses under his breath before the door is ripped open in front of them.
Billy is the one to greet them at the door, chest puffed out as he eyes the shorter boys. He then leans on the side of the door, mocking them with one hand on a hip and a smirk playing his face.
“Well well well,” the older boy says. Without turning around and breaking eye contact with any of the middle schoolers, he shouts to get your attention.
“Babe! Your Goonies are here!”
From inside the house in the living room, you squat in front of the television as you continue attempting to set up the film you chose.
“Yeah? And are you gonna let them in?” you ask, already smelling his alpha male behavior from a mile away. Billy reluctantly gives in, knowing he couldn’t deny you of anything you want, and opens the door wider to let the dorky dwarfs in. One at a time, they all rush to get inside, with a quiet Will being let in first by Billy, then come Mike second, and Lucas third. Dustin swallows audibly and keeps his eyes glued to his shoes as to not give the older boy any reason for trouble, and nearly loses it when he’s stopped by a hand on his chest.
“It wasn’t me, I swear! It was all Lucas’s idea, he was the one who was gonna hit on M—“ Dustin is quick to throw Lucas under the bus to save his own ass, and Billy would be lying if he said it didn’t make him wanna laugh for days. Of course this one kid in particular is the narc of the bunch. Makes sense.
“You agreed that you’d be civil, Billy! Ten seconds, you lasted not ten seconds!” you scold him as you march over to the door, livid enough to scare Billy back to being nice again. Without any further stalling, Billy looks down in what the kids see as shame, which they didn’t think he was even capable of feeling, then allows the ballcap wearing kid inside. Like a completely different person than he was not even five seconds ago, has he been fucking possessed, he walks over to where you stand and look knowingly at him. With a kiss on the cheek, and a whisper that none of the younger ones are able to hear, you’re back to normal and Billy is unusually quiet.
All the boys watch the show, seeing him go from alpha dog to obedient puppy instantaneously. Dustin mouthed ’what the fuck was that’ to Mike, baffled by the affect you had on the malicious blonde.
Mike rolls his eyes as he takes off his coat before muttering, “Love makes people crazy. And weird. But mostly crazy.”
—
“Billy was oh so very kind enough to make all you guys popcorn for the movie we’re watching tonight,” you squeeze Billy’s hip when you refer to him before he yelps and blushes. All the kids have no fucking idea how this monster has transformed, blushing because a girl touched him.
“Uh, thanks,” Dustin awkwardly reaches for one of the bowls of popcorn, hasty when he takes a piece and puts it in his mouth, trying to play detective to see if Billy put something in it.
When you and Billy walk to the kitchen he starts a dramatic coughing fit and lets out a string of curses, spitting it out then warns Lucas that he thinks it was poisoned.
“Everything okay out there?” You check in after hearing odd commotion, pulling away from the kisses that Billy was sprinkling all over your neck.
“Yeah, Dustin just choked on a kernel. He’ll be just fine, won’t you, Dusty?” Lucas harshly pats the boy’s back in an effort to cover up his stupidity as an accident. Will shakes his head at his dumb friends, but offers to eat it if he doesn’t want it.
“Hey Y/N, when are we starting the movie? We didn’t come here to sit and wait around, you know!” Mike calls out, all four of them going to the kitchen to see what the hold up was before peeking at quite a sight. It was you sitting on the kitchen counter, Billy between your legs, exchanging kisses and whispers of promises for what’s to come later as he softly combs his fingers through your hair keeping it out of your face. All four of their jaws dropped at the nauseating poster of pure tenderness being displayed in front of their eyes. The other hand that wasn’t in your hair was rubbing your waist, and it didn’t even look that sexual, instead looking just so goddamn loveable that it nearly made them all simultaneously hurl.
“I’ll — We’ll be out there in a minute, guys,” you stutter and laugh when Billy makes a face then traces a sweet line down your jaw with his thumb. “We’re making more popcorn!”
“Okay, no they’re not. That’s not what making popcorn looks like,” Dustin shakes his head and fakes a gagging sound.
“No shit, doofus. Who the hell would ever think Hill-Billy Hargrove could ever be that in love with someone who’s not himself,” Mike mumbles, before wordlessly throwing a pillow that lands directly at Dustin’s face.
When you and Billy finally emerge from the kitchen after whatever gross activities that high schoolers do, nothing but bickering is to be heard. You surrender with a shrug and an empty apology before pressing play on the film.
“So what is it that we’re watching, exactly?”
“Nightmare on Elm Street,” Billy answers the curly haired boy, not taking his eyes off the screen or his hands off Y/N. You two have somewhat of an unspoken language, communicating with nods and gestures that none of the middle schoolers can wrap their heads around. You’d nod your head to the bowl if you’d like to be fed a piece of popcorn, and without any protests on his end, your boyfriend feeds it right to you and then grabs a handful for himself. Mike wants to throw up, Dustin wants to die because of the horrible movie choice, and Will simply sits tight and kicks back his feet, somewhat enjoying himself.
“Uh, who the hell picked this garbage for us to watch?” Dustin asks, shoving his toothless mouth full of the buttery snack.
“The lady gets to pick whatever we do and whatever we watch, because she was sweet enough to even let you come over in the first place,” Billy spits, before earning a certain look from you that says ’you know better’ making him shut his trap. He nestles his face into your neck as a sheepish way to say he’s sorry, that he’ll try better before you get excited when asking him for another one of his heavenly massages. Billy is the number one champion at getting all the knots that sit in your shoulders and your neck out, and he never complains about doing the job either. He loves pleasing you. Turning to the side to give him a better angle at your back, he gets right to work and even puts his elbow into the mix. He always loves the soft sounds you let out from how pleasant the sensations are.
“Mm, you like it here? Want me to go up higher?”
“No no, it’s perfect right there. Wait, little lower. And harder. Yeah, that’s it,” you guide him and he follows your directions flawlessly, ignoring the glares from the dwarfs that have to sit and listen to this shit.
“Should’ve brought those barf bags that they use on planes,” Mike grumbles, turning his head back to the television where Johnny Depp is talking on the phone in a crop top. Freddie Krueger has yet to fuck shit up and kill people, but Dustin still covers his eyes and hides in Lucas’s shoulder.
Halfway through the movie, after Billy had given up massaging you given the cramp that started up in his hands, he gets bored. So bored, in fact, that fucking with the kids sounds like the perfect entertainment for right now. His girl is still nestled under his arm, and he’s sure as shit proud that you barely even flinched while watching Freddie slit numerous bodies open, cheap scare after cheap scare. And then the perfect idea comes to him.
“You know, I actually read somewhere that this movie’s based on a true story.”
Dustin snaps his head to the teenage blonde and gasps aloud, hiding further into the blankets. You on the other hand laugh at the absurdity and his attempt at scaring the kids, but allowing him to continue. It’s the first time he’s actually spoken to them without making a threat or ridiculing the boys anyway.
“You’re shitting me.”
Billy shakes his head, somehow in some way keeping a straight face as he stirs up even more complete utter bullshit. “Nope. They say that there really was a guy in a fedora that would come to you in your dreams, and if he killed you in your sleep, you’d die for real.”
The kids begin to outrage.
“Alright, that’s just—“
“Nuh-uh, no way, man. I’m never getting a second of sleep ever again!”
“Now WAIT a second, that can’t possibly be possible!”
And that’s where you draw the line, deciding they’ve had enough. “Okay, guys, GUYS! He was joking. That was his attempt at a joke,” you silence the chaos, while Billy sits there with a shit eating grin at the gasoline he poured into the fire. He could rile them up without even lifting a finger, and he was happy about that.
“You’re a goddamn demon! Jesus!” Dustin roars, pointing a finger at Billy as he sits and stares, not intimidated by the Little Red Riding Hoods that threaten him.
“Demon Jesus? Never heard of that one,” he smirks, getting up and throwing a blanket over the kid’s face. Dustin scrambles to shove it off him, annoyed at how Billy is Mister Nice Guy to Y/N but a fucking asshole to everybody else entirely.
“Shut up you guys, I wanna finish the movie already,” Will objects, trying to turn the sound up on the television to tune out the dispute. After the whole house finally seems to settle down and finish it up, you end up asleep and cuddled into Billy’s entire side as he pets your arm as to soothe you even though you’re not even awake, Will’s knocked out on the floor, same goes for Dustin and Lucas. The only ones left that haven’t yawned once are Billy and Mike.
It’s somewhat awkward when the credits begin to roll, giving the two boys no more room for something to do as they uncomfortably lay in silence. Mike almost wants to pretend to be asleep just to ditch any attempt at conversation Billy may potentially try, but it’s too late when they accidently make eye contact.
“Um, I’m gonna tuck her in to her bed real quick,” Billy whispers, holding up a finger to his lips to make Mike stay quiet. The younger boy nods in understanding, and then Billy carefully gets up from the couch and grabs you bridal style before carrying you to your room. When he comes back, Mike is still staring at the ceiling, thinking loud enough for Billy to want to say something to the kid.
“I was just messin’ with you kids, uh, about the movie being real and all. I didn’t know it’d piss all you off that much,” he scratches the back of his neck. Mike nods again, assuring him it didn’t freak him out nearly as much as it did his other two dweeb friends.
“Um, would it be cool if I asked you something?” the younger boy whispers after he gets up to join Billy in the kitchen, thankfully more private and away from all the sleeping figures in the living room. Billy stays standing but nods at the chair, signaling Mike to sit. He complies before awaiting an answer.
“Depends on what you ask.”
“Um, you seem really good at like, how to treat a girl. You’re usually terrifying but tonight I witnessed you hand feeding Y/N and giving her a massage for like an hour, not to mention the kissing and other gross stuff, but I just don’t get it,” he finishes, not knowing if he worded any of that right. And also worrying about getting punched for even asking.
“What don’t you understand?” Billy furrows his brows, unaware of what he was being asked here.
“I love her and respect her. Which is what you’re supposed to do,” he answers, opening the fridge to grab a beverage. He looks back at Mike, then back to the fridge, then wordlessly snatches a Caprisun and throws it at Mike who barely catches it in time.
“No! No I know but I just—“
“Shh,” the older boy scolds, whispering for Mike to keep his voice down. He shakes his head then beckons the boy to come out back with him. Mike, somewhat frightened and confused, follows his lead not knowing where this conversation is leading. Billy takes a seat on the lawn chair before pulling a pack out of his back pocket, taking a stick out and putting it between his lips.
“Wanna elaborate then, please?” he scoffs with the cigarette in his lips, searching every pocket and even the outside table for a lighter. Mike stands stiffly as he fumbles to do as he was asked.
“I wanna know how you did it, y’know, got all that ‘feelings’ stuff down and then get to the good stuff,” Mike stumbles.
Billy, having found a lighter, pauses as he burns the top of his cigarette then takes a puff before letting out a laugh of disbelief.
“You’re comin’ to me for advice on how to get with my own goddamn sister.” Billy concludes. “Well, I’ll have you know that if you or any of you twerps lay a fucking finger on her I’ll—“
“Woah woah woah, no. That’s not what I want, okay! Your sister is annoying and gross,” Mike defends himself, even holding his hands up in some sort of pussy way to protect himself.
Billy pulls another face, huffing smoke out his nose akin to a dragon before getting even angrier.
“Don’t you dare call her that either, motherfucker!”
“So you don’t want me liking her or hating her. Makes perfect sense,” Mike gives him attitude, seemingly forgetting who he’s talking to.
“Hey, shitbird. I don’t want any of you piss-for-brains even near Maxine, but if you’re not talking about her, who the hell are you talking about?” Billy wonders, finding himself actually curious for once about middle school gossip.
“Wait, it’s not that little girl named after a number, is it?”
Mike’s avoidance serves as a confirmation.
Billy chuckles as he blows out more smoke, then even offers the middle schooler a hit, raiding his brows. He knows how bad the girl trouble gets, especially at that age when you have no idea what’s going on and why girls are hot and make you nervous all the sudden.
Mike’s face scrunches up in disgust.
“Dude, Y/N would kill you if she saw you offering me that.”
“That’s… yeah, you’re right. Pretend nothing happened,” Billy agreed.
“Okay. So were you just planning on making fun of me and then suggesting I smoke, or—“
Billy puts his hand up to silence him.
“Kid, I learned through bad experiences. But it takes the right girl that forgives and forgets when you fuck up. A special girl, not just the first one that walks by,” he explains, ashing the last of his spliff and putting a hand on Mike’s shoulder.
“Y/N did that? Forgive you and forget all the messed up shit you pulled?” he asks.
“Well, yeah. Only ‘cause she loves me. And she keeps me in line,” he fiddled with the ring on his middle finger as he speaks, still giddy and lovesick even after all this time he’s been with you. Mike doesn’t find it cute in the slightest, he snorts at it even, but takes his advice and keeps it at heart. He mutters ”whipped” on his way back inside, before gasping as a hand yanks on the back of his shirt, forcing him backward.
“Good luck with the girl, kid. But I’m holding you responsible for keeping your friends the fuck off my sister.”
