Chapter Text
Normalcy was a rare thing nowadays. Between the revolution rapidly picking up steam and tensions within the group rising, quiet moments where everything was okay were few and far between. They were something to be savoured.
Of course, nothing really seemed normal without Simon around.
While it was true that they lost people almost every day, when someone who’d been around as long as him was lost, it was like the air itself had been suffocated with the grief of dozens of lost and afraid androids. Even with the revolution giving the residents of Jericho something to hope for, with Markus slowly taking over the de facto role of “leader”, that feeling didn’t go away. Not entirely.
So naturally, everyone rejoiced when they saw the PL600 return. Badly damaged, but alive.
Markus was the first to see him. The relief he felt at the sight of his lost companion was indescribable. Markus had genuinely thought Simon had died on that roof, and he wasn’t the only one by any stretch of the imagination. He had felt guilty. He still did, admittedly.
Markus hugged Simon like it was the last time they would ever get to see each other.
Markus’ guilt washed away when he felt Simon hug him back.
The next person to see Simon alive was Josh. He, too, was unfathomably relieved to see his friend still alive. He was able to restore the thirium Simon lost to his wounds, and the biocomponents that had been damaged were among the ones they had stolen from the CyberLife warehouse.
Simon spent the next few hours swarmed by the androids who’d believed he was dead. Tears of joy were shed, hugs were exchanged, and Jericho’s atmosphere increased significantly.
Normalcy had been restored.
At least, that’s what Simon let everyone think.
He shifted uncomfortably in place again. He was sitting on a bench on the far end of the boat he and countless other androids called home. He ran another diagnostic. Something in his stomach cavity had been disconnected. Whether the damage was done during the attack or while he was escaping, he didn’t know. The diagnostics he’d run time and time again insisted that it wasn’t a fatal malfunction. So long as he didn’t overexert himself or disconnect anything more major, he would be fine.
It wasn’t worth telling the others about.
Simon looked up across the abandoned ship yard. It was raining, but not too noticeably. More of a light drizzle than anything. The wind whistled softly. It was peaceful.
Moments like these had to be savoured.
“Simon?”
A familiar voice jerked Simon out of his thoughts. He turned around and his eyes fell on discrepantly colored ones. He smiled softly.
“Hi, Markus. What do you need?”
Markus’ eyes studied Simon closely. He tried not to appear flustered under Markus’ hardened gaze.
“You’re still damaged. Right?”
It was phrased as a question, but Markus spoke it as an accusation. One that Simon couldn’t deny was true. His smile faltered and he looked away.
“It’s fine. I’m fine,” Simon lied.
He could see Markus shake his head in his peripheral vision. The prototype android came closer, sitting next to Simon and placing a hand on his shoulder.
“It’s making you uncomfortable, isn’t it?”
As much as Simon wanted Markus to drop it and let him deal with it alone, something about the gentle tone in which the latter spoke made it hard to lie to him. He nodded hesitantly.
“Then it’s not fine, Simon. Open up your stomach cavity, I want to have a look.”
That was so out of left field to Simon, he was amazed he didn’t choke on his own tongue or spontaneously combust. Open his stomach cavity? God, Markus might as well have asked him the equivalent of “get naked and on my bed”, for crying out loud.
Simon’s not sure which would’ve been worse, to be honest.
A few seconds passed before Simon remembered how to talk. “Markus, it’s really nothing. I could probably fix it myself if I needed to.”
Markus shook his head again. “Simon. To put it bluntly, we both know that’s bullshit.”
And it was. The angle was too off; if Simon tried to fix the problem himself, he wouldn’t be able to see what he was doing. Plus, Simon doubts he has the constitution needed to stick his hand into his own mechanisms. He would need someone else’s help, and he already knew Markus wasn’t going to let this go until the problem was fixed.
The movement Simon made was more of a twitch than a nod, but the message was clear. He shrugged off his jacket and shirt, then deactivated the skin on his stomach, revealing the plastic white beneath. He looked up and away from the shiny plastic, the reality of the situation setting in. Markus was about to see his insides. Oh god, Markus was going to put his hands in Simon’s insides.
Markus gave him an expectant look, which confused Simon for a second before he put the pieces together.
“Oh, right…”
Simon tried to subdue the shaking of his hands as he lowered them down and opened his stomach cavity. A low hiss sounded out as a panel was moved out of the way, exposing Simon’s damaged components. A sense of vulnerability swept over him. So many vital biocomponents were on display right now. If any one of these wires or tubes that transported blue blood around Simon’s body were pulled out, he’d be dead on the floor in minutes.
Simon would be scared if anyone else was doing this. But something about it being Markus, someone he trusted, who he cared about so much, someone he loved stopped his anxiety from rising higher than it was right now.
Markus leaned in and started searching for the disconnected wires. His gaze was intense and focused, which definitely didn’t make Simon feel even more like he was on display. Markus’ stare lightened when he found the problem, taking one of his hands and pointing at something Simon couldn’t see from his angle.
“A few of the wires that send movement signals to your leg are detached. That’s probably why you’ve been limping, even with the new leg. Looks like a non-major biocomponent is misaligned, too. Can you lean back so I can see better?”
The way Markus explained everything wrong was so casual and matter-of-fact. To him, this was just a routine maintenance check, but the situation seemed much more personal to Simon. More intimate.
Fuck, Simon was in over his head.
He acquiesced Markus’ request and leaned back until his stomach was raised forward and Simon was resting his weight on his hands. He winced as he felt the affected components shift unnaturally. Markus muttered a thank you and kneeled on the bench between Simon’s legs, taking one of the disconnected wires between his fingers and oh-so-carefully moving it back to the port it belonged in.
It was the most bizarre feeling. There shouldn’t have been touch sensors in Simon’s internal mechanisms (for obvious reasons), but he could still feel the pressure as the wire was pushed and pulled around, followed by a twitch in his leg when it was plugged back in. Markus repeated the process two more times with the other wires, still moving his hands slowly and careful not to touch anything he didn’t need to, like if his hand so much as grazed something it would break the pale android in front of him.
“Try moving your leg,” Markus suggested, removing his hands from Simon’s torso and shuffling out of the way so Simon had space to do so.
Simon stuck his leg out and turned it from side to side. He bent his knee. The movements were fluid and none of his joints were locking up like they had been the past few days.
“I’d consider that a success, then,” Markus grinned.
Simon couldn’t help but smile, too. He hoped he wasn’t blushing too hard.
Markus crawled back into place and placed his right hand just above Simon’s hip, while his other hand reached back into Simon’s stomach cavity to get a grip on the misaligned biocomponent. The unusual pressure came back as Markus pulled on it, causing a sharp gasp to escape Simon. Markus looked up at him, badly disguised panic on his face.
“Are you okay?” he asked, speaking so quickly the words almost got tangled up.
“I’m fine. It just feels...weird...when you pull things. It surprised me, that’s all.”
Markus nodded. “I’m sorry. I’m trying my best not to hurt you, but--”
“Markus, it’s fine. You’re doing a good job. You’re trying really hard, don’t think for a second I haven’t noticed.”
Markus’ eyes flitted between Simon’s face and the open space his hand was occupying. He opened and closed his mouth, like he was going to say something, before shrugging it off and leaning back down to continue fixing Simon.
Markus ran his fingers over the biocomponent, trying to find the best angle to adjust it from. It made Simon shiver; components like arms or legs are one thing; they’re external components most androids use and touch every day.
But this one had never seen the light of day. Expected to only ever be touched when being repaired in a controlled environment, in an official CyberLife maintenance shop or the like, while the android was temporarily shut down.
But Simon was awake, and so, so aware of the fingers tracing his internal component.
Markus eventually gripped the component and moved his free hand to Simon’s shoulder with a preemptively apologetic look. Markus looked back down, his grip on the component tightening as he quickly twisted it, making Simon twitch involuntarily.
“Ah!”
Markus looked up again, wincing on Simon’s behalf.
“Sorry!”
Simon wanted to shake his head and insist that he was okay, that it didn’t hurt. Because it hadn’t, really. Markus grit his teeth, concern painted across his face. He sat back, retracting his hands from Simon’s torso once again.
“I think I’m done. Is there anything else malfunctioning?” Markus asked.
Simon ran a diagnostic. Everything came up as fully functional. Simon smiled softly. “I’m okay now. Thanks, Markus.”
“Good. I don’t like seeing you hurt, Simon. If you get hurt again, make sure to tell me, okay?”
Simon studied Markus’ face. His eyes were soft, his lips pulled up into a small smile.
Simon could get lost in those eyes for eternity.
Simon wanted to kiss those lips more than anything in the world.
Markus’ eyes fell back to Simon’s still open torso.
“Is something wrong with your thirium pump regulator?”
Simon blinked himself out of his thoughts. “Wh-What?”
“Your regulator. It started going haywire all of a sudden.”
Oh.
Oh.
Simon’s face flushed.
“No. No, nothing’s wrong, I just--”
“Simon, please. If something is wrong, I want to know. I care about you. I…”
Markus trailed off while Simon turned his face away from him, trying to hide the fact that his face was turning a brilliant shade of blue. Simon felt his heart skip a beat, which definitely didn’t help the matter.
Markus’ hand hovered over Simon’s regulator, and for a moment Simon wished he would pull it out just so he wouldn’t have to admit why his heart was fluttering so much, so he wouldn’t have to admit his heart just does this when Markus is close to him.
He’d just said nothing is wrong. He doesn’t want Markus to think he’s lying.
“I just...I...I...it’s not a malfunction. I’m okay, I promise,” Simon responded, moving to push Markus away.
“Then what, Simon?” Markus asked, grabbing Simon’s hands as they landed on his chest.
“God, Markus! It’s not that simple! Please just drop it, okay?”
“Simon, you can’t keep hiding things from us. Whatever it is, you have everyone in Jericho to back you up.”
“They can’t help me!” Simon’s voice was louder than he wanted it to be, but he couldn’t get Markus to let go of his hands or let him stand up. His pump regulator was flashing rapidly, his heart pounding.
“Simon!”
“Nobody can help me because…” Simon sighed in frustration, grabbed Markus by the shirt and pulled him forward until he felt Markus’ lips on his. He felt Markus gasp, like he’d finally put the pieces together.
The kiss was over as soon as it began. Simon only became aware he was tearing up when he felt the tears spill over and run down his face.
“...Simon--”
“Don’t say it. I know it’s stupid. I know I’m an idiot for being head over heels for someone who almost broke his back and died before I even spoke to him,” he snorted as he recalled the memory.
Markus let Simon’s hands fall from his grasp. Simon’s heartbeat had slowed down to slightly faster than average. His eyes were flat, his smile forced and empty and totally betrayed by the steady flow of tears pouring down.
Simon closed his stomach cavity and made a move to stand up, fully intending to find an empty room in the boat and stay there until he emotionally recovered, so he could pretend this never happened.
He felt two hands land on his shoulders, keeping him seated. He blinked in confusion at the android in front of him.
“Markus?”
Markus didn’t reply, only moved one of his hands away from Simon’s shoulder and took Simon’s hand in his own. Markus guided their joined hands up, and Simon watched as the synthetic skin on Markus’ hand melt away. Without really knowing why, Simon did the same to his own.
Information overwhelmed him. Memories and feelings that weren’t his own. A painter, giving Markus advice. Markus, and a painting of red and blue hands. A young man, bleeding unconscious on the floor. Thunder, screaming, hands, a dying woman begging for her life. Finding the trail to Jericho. Simon saw himself through Markus’ eyes. Simon felt Markus’ confusion, distress, his enlightenment as he hatched his plan to steal from CyberLife warehouses.
His absolute fear when Simon got shot.
He saw Markus and the other members of Jericho mourning him, not knowing if he was safe and assuming the worst.
He saw Markus, alone on a rooftop nearby, playing a tune on a piano absentmindedly.
He heard Markus slam his hands to the keys discordantly, felt his mind stop in its tracks as he realised he cared for Simon as so much more than a friend.
The connection between them severed as their hands recoiled from each other and returned to their usual skin colors.
“I...I saw your memories…Carl, and his mansion?” Simon said, barely a whisper as he processed what he’d seen.
“I saw yours, too. David, the man who took you, th-the death of that man...I felt like I was there with you.”
“But that’s not...all you saw, right?”
“No,” Markus replied. “No, I...I felt your feelings. The fear, the pain, the sadness, the hope...the love…”
“So did I,” Simon breathed. His hand found Markus’ again, intertwining their fingers. He leaned into Markus until their foreheads were almost touching
“Markus?”
“Yes?”
“I love you.”
Markus’ eyes darted between Simon’s eyes and his lips. A silent question which Simon replied to just as silently. He leaned in and kissed Markus again, and his heart soared with affection when he felt Markus kiss him back this time.
Simon was the first to pull away, tracing circles on Markus’ hand with his thumb. “Can we stay like this for a while?”
Markus pecked Simon’s lips again and squeezed his hand.
“Of course.”
Quiet moments where everything was okay were few and far between.
Moments like that you could share with another were even rarer.
Markus and Simon cherished this moment together with everything they had.