Chapter Text
She forgets about their little deal until Mel catches up with her at work one day, perky and excited. "Hey, are you still good for Thursday?"
Trinity looks up from her dictation tool. Even on a not holiday she's in charting hell. "Huh?"
"Thursday," Mel prompts, bouncing a little bit on her toes. "For us to have sex" she whispers not not-obviously but still a little obviously.
"Uh, what?" Shit. "Yeah, yes. Was that this Thursday?" Goddammit, she had forgotten. They had looked at their off days together; working six days a week was a nightmare already and then having to have the same day off was even worse for logistics but they had found three weeks later. As in the present three days from now. Shit.
Mel frowns, did she misinterpret things again? It's so hard to get Trinity. She clearly is a kind person, and she's a good doctor, but there's so much sarcasm on top of it all Mel just doesn't always catch everything. That's nothing new, but it still stings to finally finally have something for herself, only to realize she's built it all on a misunderstanding. She was getting excited to hold it over Becca's head, something sisterly instead of caretaker-y. Something normal. She wants to be normal. Or as normal as she can be. Orphan, caretaker-at-27, emergency medicine doctor here in the Pitt of all places, probably all not normal. But she can try. It's all she's ever done. She opens her mouth to tell Trinity that she's sorry for misunderstanding, that she hopes it wasn't unprofessional, but Trinity beats her too it.
"Uh, I mean yeah. Super ready." She doesn't sound super ready, she mostly sounds surprised. "I just. Have to do. Something first," she stutters out awkwardly before badging out of her computer and dashing off towards the nurses station.
Mel nods to herself. So they're still on for Thursday?
Trinity has a plan. A small inkling of a plan that will hopefully not righteously embarrass her but she is committed to doing this right. She slides up nonchalantly to Dana (after checking that Perlah and Princess aren't around, she would never live it down) and asks as casually as she can, "just checking, what tops are in an STI panel?"
"Tiger and red, why?" Dana says without looking up from her papers.
“Cool, no reason. Just thought I saw someone draw the wrong labs on my patient. Thanks!”
And then she's gone as quickly as she came. She doesn't hear the questioning "we don't have any patients who need that right now? Miracle that it is," Dana mutters to herself.
Trinity looks around to make sure no one's looking before digging through the supply cart to grab the tubes. She bags them and slips behind Vivi at one of the wall computers.
"Psst," she whispers, "can you draw these for me? And then run them up?”
Vivi grabs the bag, “sure, which room?”
Trinity cringes.“No, like on me?” The nurse looks at the tubes and back up at the doctor to give her a look. A knowing one. Motherfucker-
Trinity rolls up her sleeve and frantically whispers “look, I’m hooking up with someone soon and forgot to get tested, I’ll write my own order I just don’t want it getting out-“
Vivi snorts a laugh, "yeah I’ll run your labs, doc." She fishes in her pockets for a tourniquet and butterfly. "There are some people here who get this panel done every three months so good on you for having some restraint.” She nabs an alcohol swab off of the computer table and gets to work.
“Fucking- every three months?? Who??”
Vivi twists the tourniquet around her arm, “can’t answer that, HIPPA. But who do you think?”
A quick pinch, “I literally have zero idea.” She runs through a mental checklist of who could possibly be fucking enough new people to get tested every three months. The ones that spring to mind make no sense. McKay is constantly bitching about being lonely, same with Mohan. Maybe someone from night shift? But who…
Vivi gets her samples and smacks a band-aid on her before Trinity can finish the mental roster.
“Well…” Vivi says with a knowing and sagely and infuriating tilt of her head. “I’ll run these up myself," she winks discreetly, "just put in an order so I can print the label upstairs?”
“Yeah sure.” Well that was mostly painless, emotionally and physically. Soon enough she's back in the flow of patients and the board and the never ending fucking revolving door when she sees Mel again.
"Oh hey, Melanoma?"
Mel looks up from her computer with those slightly-uncomfortable-puppy eyes she seems to always have after anything extra chaotic.
"About Thursday? I'm good." She flashes a thumbs up before twisting away back to the board to pick up someone new.
Mel calls her back. "Wait, good like we're through and you don't want to anymore or good like you're good and it's still happening?"
Trinity smiles, it's weirdly nice to have easy communication about this stuff. Mel isn't worried about looking desperate, looking easy. She's just… talking. Yolanda's got to have like, at least ten years on them and she could learn a thing or two.
"Like good-good, like positive it's still happening."
Mel smiles, still puppy-like. Trinity thinks if Mel had a tail to wag, she probably would. "Great!" Mel says, perking herself up. "I can't wait!"
Trinity saunters back to the board, more pep in her step. She needed something like that to bring back the smugness this place is determined to beat out of her. It doesn't go unnoticed. Dennis looks between her and Mel at her desk across the space.
“What’s that all about?”
“What? A girl can’t make friends?” she smirks as she scans the board.
“You hate friends," Dennis says, affronted. "You said we’re not even friends and we live together. You can’t even say that you like me out loud and you want to make friends!?” But Trinity’s already walking away.
“Can’t hear you! Too busy saving lives!” God, that feels good.
~~
Trinity gets the results back in her email on Wednesday. Totally clear. So it doesn’t cover everything but the important stuff is there so. All that's left is to wait. Victoria asks her "who are you and what have you done with Dr. Santos?" about the pleasant mood she's had since she got the email, and she doesn't even have it in her to bitch back. She's too… well it's maybe not excited but it's definitely something positive.
Thursday rolls around and Trinity sleeps in until past 1:00, it’s glorious. She rolls over in bed and checks her phone.
From an unknown number, "Maybe: Melissa King" says the screen.
“Good morning, I realized we never set a time?” - 0900
“Oh, it’s Mel by the way.” - 0918
“I got your number from the WhatsApp group chat, I hope that’s okay.” - 0925
“Let me know what time you were thinking. I am free all day!” - 1011
Trinity smiles at the gaps of time between messages. There’s no double texting bullshit, no mind games and you know what? She hasn’t had a good morning text since. Since… holy shit since ever? Christ, that’s depressing.
She taps out a response. “hey mellifluous im good for whenever. Probably tonight i just woke up”
Mel responds back immediately. “Oh, good afternoon then! Can it not be too late? With work tomorrow I try to get to bed at a decent time? Can I come over at six?”
Holy shit, that is so fucking early for a hook up but honestly? Now that she thinks about it, what else was she going to do today? And bed at a decent hour sounds like a winner before restarting six in a fucking row like it’s the damn medieval times.
“Six is awesome can you bring dinner?”
“Yes! I know a good pizza place, is that okay?”
“sure half meat lovers for me plz n thx” before she rolls back over and drops the phone face down on the bedside table. She drags herself out of bed finally around 3-something and cleans a bit.
Dennis hasn't been home too much, so it’s really just her own room and the kitchen and that only takes like an hour. Then she’s scarfing an apple for "breakfast" and a microwaveable breakfast sandwich for "lunch" back to back since she missed the normal window for eating -- gotta catch up. Then it’s just. Waiting.
It’s harder than she thought. Excited still feels like the wrong word, like she's not giddy to fuck awkward co-worker Dr. Melissa King but maybe anticipatory? She can’t deny she’s kind of curious to see what Mel is like in bed. Her phone pings again. Dr. Garcia. Yolanda.
Trinity purses her lips, it’s usually a tricky subject when she gets a text from Garcia while she’s working. It’s never anything nice. Usually “shitty day u busy tonight” and because she is pathetic and horny and lonely she always answers “no."
Then it goes “great be there at 8:00” and then it’s incredible orgasms (for Yola) and shitty ramen (for both of them) and falling asleep alone (for Trinity) and then back to the grind. It's not like she really wants good morning messages or real dates or to cuddle after or whatever. She's a big girl. She can handle casual.
Sure enough: “u busy?”
She smirks as she taps back “yeah actually. can’t tonight”
Let her sit with that. It feels good to reject her instead of the other way around. That’s probably petty and unhealthy but whatever. She’s devoting her life to service, that’s gotta save a few points somewhere, right?
She showers and snacks and dicks around on Reddit trolling assholes until there’s a ring from her phone at 6:00 sharp.
“Hey! It’s Mel!" comes through the speaker, bright and peppy like she's here for book club and not to get her walls beat for the first time ever. "I’m here, um but it says you have to buzz me in?”
“Yeah, hold on.” Trinity does and soon enough Mel is at her door, smiling really big with two pizza boxes in her hands.
“I don’t like meat lovers pizza and I don’t like when two kinds are touching so I got you your own? I hope that’s okay.”
Trinity grins, “that’s better than okay, that’s fucking awesome. Thank you, seriously.” She takes the pizza boxes and tells Mel to take her shoes off and put them there, and put her bag here and she seems to appreciate the clear instructions. Trinity gets it. She’s spent enough time on tumblr back in the day to recognize autism when she sees it. Even if Mel doesn’t.
They eat and talk and Trinity actually has a blast talking to her. Mel has great stories from medical school and the VA and the way she tells them is so dry and blunt that everything just sounds hilarious. She’s a good listener too, even if she makes a lot of eye contact.
It’s past 8:00 when Mel says suddenly, “I’m having a lot of fun so it’s okay if we don’t, but did you still want to have sex? With me, I mean.”
She had honestly forgotten that was the whole reason Mel had come over, she was just happy to hang out and eat. “Oh. Yeah. Uh," she pulls her phone out. "Yes, actually I have something for you.” She pulls up her lab results and shows Mel the screen.
“HIV, the hepatitis-es, syphilis. The big ones, all negative.”
“Oh," Mel starts. "Yeah, thank you. I forgot you’re supposed to do that. I don’t-"
“If you’ve never had sex before it’s fine. I mean we work with a lot of body fluids but like, it’s fine. I trust you.” She had done this more for Mel anyway. If she really was going to give Mel her first time, she wanted it to be done right.
“I trust you too! You’re a very competent doctor," Mel says earnestly.
The compliment hits Trinity like a truck. She blinks in surprise. “Whoa. Uh, thanks. You too. You’re a great doctor.”
“Thank you! I really try my best but they do not make it easy!” She stands up, “so!” She claps her hands together. “How do we start? Do your clothes come off now or later? Is kissing part of it every time like in the movies or is that unrealistic?”
Trinity is more than a little caught off guard. “Whoa, you want to start uh? Like right now?”
“Yes," she says seriously. "I try to have my bedtime by 10:30 but I figured maybe I could push it for this? Still, it’s almost 8:45 now plus the drive home and everything so…” She looks expectantly at Trinity, who seems to be buffering.
“Wow," she manages. "You’ve really thought this through.”
“Well I like to be prepared. And part of being a good doctor is planning ahead and time management.”
“Very true." Trinity takes a breath before she -- fuck it -- commits to the evening. She stands up to join Mel and brings a finger up like she's teaching.
"And to answer your question, you can do sex basically in any order or not at all, that’s what’s cool about it. Like, we could hold hands and then start kissing and take off each other’s clothes and have sex that way, or I could just drop your pants and start eating you out right here and that’s also sex.”
Mel looks surprised at the second example with the way her eyebrows shoot up. “Oh, there are more variables than I thought then. That’s a little overwhelming. Is there uh, like a standard version?”
“Yeah, kind of.” She grabs Mel’s arm, pulls her into her bedroom and closes the door. Mel sits on the bed while Trinity stands in front of her, arms crossed as she takes her in.
“It’s your first time, right? Like ever?”
“Yes," Mel nods while she looks up at her. There's an almost militant sense to the air as their exchange keeps up. They're VIP strategists in a meeting, tacticians on the battle field, NASA scientists calculating the exact whatever to get the satellite up. Or something.
“Have you ever kissed anyone?”
“Yes! Before medical school, in college. I went to a few parties. I liked the kissing but not the parties and I could only find people to kiss me at parties so I didn’t do it a lot.”
“Fair, college parties kind of suck," Trinity assents. "Okay so how about this.” She paces back and forth in front of her bed while Mel sits and watches her, head tracking her back and forth like a puppy.
“Your first time should be genuinely nice," she says decidedly. "Like my first time sucked and then I had shitty sex after that because my benchmark was so low," she points at Mel. "So yours should be your way. Whatever that means to you.”
Mel nods seriously. She feels like maybe she should be taking notes?
“Okay, so I’ll give you some questions and then you ask me questions if you have any, and we’ll make a game plan and then do it?”
“That helps a lot," Mel sighs with relief. "Knowing the order of things makes me feel better. Not that I don’t feel good already!”
Trinity grins, “relax, Casanova, I get it. First question: lights on, off or partially on?”
“Oh, not fully on, please. It’ll get overstimulating for me.”
“Got it. So like this or this?” She flicks all the lights off before turning on the bedside lamp, filling the room with a subtle warm light. Without it, she can barely see anything — a much needed blessing during her night shift trials in med school.
Mel looks like she’s pondering the two still, so Trinity flicks the lamp on and off again. “What do you think?”
“The lamp can stay on," Mel decides with a nod. "I want to be able to see what I’m doing.”
“Makes sense.” She lets herself sit with a plop onto the bed's other side so they have to turn to look at each other. “Do you want your clothes to come off? Like all the way off or no?”
“You can have sex with your clothes on?” She says it so genuinely, like she's really in awe at the possibility, like this is some new state-of-the-art technique she's only just now hearing about. Like Da Vinci robots in the 2000's or CRISPR therapy.
“Yeah?”
“Oh, I thought that was something else.”
Trinity is genuinely bewildered. “Like what?” Lesbian sex is so different from what she imagines straight sex must be like. If that's the benchmark Mel is using, then no wonder she's acting so fascinated by everything.
“I don’t know," Mel admits. "Like when people talk about first base, second base, I guess I thought if your clothes didn’t come off you were stuck at third base? But if I’m being honest I don’t really know what the bases mean anyway," she confesses.
“Uhhh well," how should she approach this? "They’re different for lesbian sex and it’s a stupid metaphor anyway. I think if there’s orgasms involved or even like, attempted, that’s sex. But everyone’s definition is different," she hurries to add, "like yours is probably also right.” Definitely don't want her feeling judged, she had had enough of that in her own first time.
“I think I like your definition more," Mel nods thoughtfully.
“Yeah me too. Obviously.”
“And for my clothes? Um. What. Do you do?” Mel asks in her start-stop way.
“I like my clothes on, but that’s because I have issues.” She says it really blasé but there’s a heavier truth to it. If I leave them on, you can’t see my thighs, the scars. If I leave them on, you can’t touch me directly, you can’t hurt me, you can’t see me judge me know me. It’s safer that way. But maybe Mel doesn’t need that.
“Uh, but it can be nice for some people," Trinity offers. "Like it’s more intimate sometimes. But leaving your clothes on is warmer or you can be under the covers the entire time or you can leave some things on but not others like, you can do whatever you want.”
“Do I have to decide now?” Trinity thinks if she said yes, Mel might whip out a pen and paper and make a pros and cons list with how seriously she's taking this.
“No, most people don’t plan it out like we’re doing anyway. Most people decide in the moment.”
“Can I do that too?”
“Yeah," Trinity shrugs and looks away, "so’s long as I can decide now that my clothes aren’t coming off all the way.” She flicks her eyes back to Mel, watches for the disappointment, the judgment, but there's none. Just open, earnest dedication.
“Okay! What’s next?” Mel pumps her fists at her sides, leaning forward and getting more into the game plan. Her energy is contagious.
Trinity inches herself more onto the bed and leans forward too so their foreheads are not so close to touching, but enough that she can take in the startling lightness of Mel's eyes. Hazel, she'd never noticed behind the glasses. They're nice. “I figured since it’s your first time, it would be you getting off. What do you like?”
Mel blinks. “What do I like for what?”
“Getting off.”
“Off what?”
“No, like how do you jack off?”
Mel looks at her cluelessly, averting her eyes before flicking them back.
Trinity takes a breath before, “how do you masturbate?”
If Mel is taken aback by the question, she doesn't show it. And she's probably not even taken aback, Trinity thinks.
“Oh. I don’t really. Unless I’m on my period, then it helps with cramps some but usually I just take some ibuprofen.”
“You. You don’t jerk off?” This is genuinely surprising. Distressing almost.
“I didn’t know women could do that.”
“Anyone can jerk off, it’s just a phrase- doesn’t matter," she flicks her hand between them, cutting herself off. "I’m asking how do you want me to touch you? Because if you have a way you masturbate that feels best, I can just do that. But if you don’t have one, I guess you can just try whatever?”
“Are there options I can pick from?” Trinity is beginning to sense a pattern.
“Yeah, like you can touch yourself and I’m also just here-“
“That sounds like it defeats the purpose-“
“Or I can use my fingers on you externally or internally or both-”
“That’s more like what I was expecting?”
“Or I can use my mouth on you and my tongue inside and outside.”
“Oh, I think I’d like that," Mel nods enthusiastically, "I liked kissing.”
“I also have some toys if you wanted like, a more uh, traditional time?” Trinity finishes.
“Do you have to do that?”
“No?" She cringes at herself, "I just didn’t know if you wanted like. The dick, uh experience?” She offers awkwardly.
“No, if it’s not necessary for sex than I’m fine. I understand that penetrative sex can hurt the first time. I’ve fingered myself on my period and that was fine but something bigger doesn’t sound like fun right now.”
Trinity sits back up straight and counts on her fingers, “okay great uh, so fingering, oral, I can do all of that. Do you want to kiss?”
Mel's eyebrows perk up, “Like right now or as part of the plan? And where in order of the plan would that be? First or at the end?”
The idea of kissing being right now is sounding better and better. The more they talk about it, the more Trinity can feel the heat building up in her stomach. “Uh, well I was thinking kissing could start it? And then some people like kissing all the way through and some people don’t.”
“Can we start kissing and if I like it we keep doing it?”
“Yeah, fine by me," Trinity rushes out in a breath before crawling over Mel's lap, settling herself half on the bed and half on the other woman.
"C’mere,” she whispers before pushing their lips together. Their kiss is awkward at first. Trinity expects a closed mouth kiss and Mel leans forward with her mouth open, expecting tongue. Once they correct themselves, Mel is surprisingly an incredible kisser. She’s soft and she learns from Trinity’s movements so fast, matching her push and pull at every turn. When Mel presses her tongue in, it’s not awkward and sloppy. She was paying attention at those parties, Trinity thinks before thoughts start to get too loose to really think them. Mel is warm and engaging and feels really really good and words get harder before they're gone completely as she loses herself in the kiss.
Trinity doesn't know how long they're kissing for before Mel pulls back, but with the way they're both flushed and panting, it must have been longer than she thought.
“Okay, um. What do we do now?” Mel's pupils are blown wide and her hands are fidgeting in her lap, clearly eager to touch. It's sweet that she's waiting though, like it's Trinity's first time too. Maybe in a way, it can be. She settles herself off of Mel's lap to sit across from her on the bed
“Um," she stutters, trying to get her brain back online. "Well if you want to move on, I can touch you over the clothes and then under the clothes?”
“Like here? Or here?” Mel points at her chest and then between her legs.
“Probably there first actually,” Trinity points to Mel’s neck. “Like I can show you?”
“Okay!” She nods enthusiastically, keeping her eyes open as Trinity leans in, like she doesn't want to miss a thing. Was she kissing with her eyes open too?
“Cool.” Trinity kisses Mel again on the lips before holding her cheek and guiding herself closer to her neck, kissing and nibbling and licking there until Mel whimpers, a tiny little sound. “Does that feel good?”
“Yeah," Mel breathes. "More than I thought. The lips make sense, lots of nerves there. But I’m surprised by the neck.”
“Everyone has different spots too. Like uh, like my feet are really sensitive. And my hands.”
“That makes sense too,” Mel sighs pleasantly. Her eyes are closed and she sounds almost sleepy as she lets herself enjoy getting kissed on. “Can I touch myself too, or does that defeat the purpose of you being here?”
Trinity licks a hot stripe underneath Mel's ear. “No," she huffs out against the damp spot, causing Mel to shiver. "Do what you want, it’s your first time.”
“I want to touch my nipples, is that okay?” She's so earnest, it's adorable.
Trinity had never considered "adorable" as a genuine compliment; more like a sarcastic way to say "naive and annoying," but on Mel? She really is adorable. In an adorable way. Hard to think right now, Mel has her hands tugging up her t-shirt and the sliver of midriff that's showing is quickly turning the dial from "adorable" to "way hotter than I thought it'd be."
“Pfft, hell yeah, girl don’t let me stop you.” Who the hell would say no to that?!
She goes back to kissing Mel’s neck, dipping up to her ear and down to her clavicle, tracing patterns on her back and over her thighs while Mel grabs her own breast. She paws around at herself for a bit before sliding her hand underneath her bra and gasps at the change in sensation.
“It wow- it never feels like this. I know arousal changes the state of sensation but wow," she sighs. "This is really nice. Thank you, Trinity,” she murmurs.
The praise and thanks go straight to Trinity's clit, and she holds back a groan. How is this becoming the hottest sex she’s ever had? This should be so unsexy, so clinical, and yet she’s never been this wet. Not even with Yolanda, who unfortunately so, is her exact type. She pushes those thoughts away and clears her throat.
“Uh, do you want me to do that for you? Touch your boobs- er, breasts? She cringes at her phrasing, either word sounds stupid out loud.
“Ooh, yes please!" Mel doesn't seem to mind. She doesn't seem to mind a lot of anything, she's realizing. Trinity wishes she could give less of a fuck like that.
"Hold on, let me take this off.” Mel takes her shirt and bra all the way off. “I decided I did want my clothes off-“ she says suddenly as if she needs to explain.
“I figured,” Trinity laughs. “Here,” and she kisses Mel again and shifts herself so they’re sitting across from each other. She brings her hands to hold Mel’s breasts, rolls her hard nipples under her thumbs. “Does that feel good?”
Mel nods enthusiastically. “Really good. Um, should I be touching you too?”
“Normally the answer would be yes, but you don’t have to if you don't want to. This is about you.”
Mel looks eager, her hands patting her thighs impatiently. “I want to.”
Shit, when was the last time someone looked at her like that? Like they wanted her not what she could do. “Then yeah, go for it. Just uh, stay over my clothes?”
Mel mm-hm's and reaches for her chest, which shouldn’t be surprising, but the way she cups her and strokes her thumbs in a mimicry of Trinity's own movements is nice for someone who’s never done this before. Pleasant. Trinity must have won the coin toss of pleasurable versus upsetting when it comes to sex this time, but a part of her knows it's not dumb luck. She feels safe with Mel, strangely enough.
“You don’t wear a bra?” Mel asks as she touches, snapping Trinity out of her thoughts.
“Not at home, no.”
“Oh." She's quiet as she massages her chest more. "I like that, is that weird?” she whispers.
“No, maybe you’re just a boob guy," Trinity says into her neck, having resumed her kissing across Mel's throat.
Mel hums and they go back to just touching. Soon enough, Mel lays them both down with an "mmph!" of surprise from Trinity. Once she's adjusted, Mel shifts herself closer to her, almost touching body to body.
“Is this okay? I just suddenly wanted to," Mel asks.
“Yeah, we couldn’t really stay sitting up forever anyway," Trinity nods, their noses almost brushing together. "Can I try something?”
“What something?”
“ I want to put my knee in between your thighs since we’re laying down. You can grind on it or like, just have it there.”
“Can we keep touching each other up here?”
“Oh yeah, for sure,” she says quickly. Why would I ever want this to stop?!
“Then okay.” She nods and Trinity slips her thigh up until her knee is slotted in between Mel’s thighs and when Mel shifts down and presses against it, she stiffens and groans.
“You good?”
“Yeah, I just didn’t expect it to feel like anything. It’s way stronger than in my nipples. Like the want for touching. Can I touch myself there too or do you have to be the one to do it since it’s sex not masturbation?” She sounds suddenly so desperate, it sparks something hungry in Trinity.
“You can do whatever you want and it’s still sex, Mel," Trinity responds, surprising herself with how little sarcasm she's using. What's happening to her? "But I can touch you there too if you want?”
“I want to touch first,” Mel decides. She takes her hands back from Trinity’s chest and wiggles her own pants down. She pauses before she asks curiously, “should I take them off all the way?”
“Yeah, why not? If you want to.” Trinity's quite proud of the restraint she seems to be able to develop in real time to not rip Mel's pants off herself. But that's not what this is about, this is about doing it right but Jesus Christ-
“I think I do.”
Mel takes everything except her socks off and then lays back down. She looks at Trinity who gestures at her, go ahead.
When Mel does slip a hand down to stroke over herself, she sits straight up and gasps. “Ohmygod, wow this feels really different.”
Trinity leans forward, worried. “Good different?”
Mel relaxes as she gets used to the sensation, lowering herself back onto the pillows. “Really really good different, can we go back to kissing?” She says it with an urgency that Trinity can't deny and then they’re kissing again, this time with a hungrier passion. Mel keeps one hand between her legs and the other, originally fondling over Trinity's tit has moved to hold onto her shoulder. Trinity keeps up her ministrations on Mel's nipples, but leaves her neck alone. She wants to watch.
She takes it all in as Mel gets herself off, watching reverently how her arm moves faster and faster until she’s gasping into Trinity’s mouth and moaning as she comes down.
“Wow, that was a big one,” Trinity says, trying to cover up her genuine awe with sarcasm. Anyone else would see through it, but Mel is… Mel.
“That felt so different from when I do it on my period," Mel pants into her neck, laughing softly. "That was amazing. Thank you, Trinity.” She nuzzles herself closer, kissing at her neck and jaw.
The 'thank you' combined with Mel's lips at her pulse point go straight to her pussy again and holy shit she has got to fuck this girl. “Do you uh, want to keep going?” Please want to keep going-
“Normally I orgasm once and then I’m done, but my body doesn’t feel satisfied? Like I want something inside? I usually don’t like that though.”
Trinity clears her throat, tries to not sound as desperate as she feels. “Well arousal changes things-”
“True, tissue expansion and increased blood flow, and sensitivity changes and-"
“Mel, can I finger you?” Trinity blurts out.
Mel seems relieved at being interrupted. “Yes please,” she nods seriously, grabbing at the other woman's hand.
Trinity settles herself lower so she can kind of see what she’s doing instead of just playing it by touch and god, Mel's so wet. She did this? She's oddly flattered. She slips a finger inside.
It feels incredible to be inside her, even with just one finger. Mel tightens her grip on Trinity’s shoulders as she enters but then relaxes as Trinity just stills her hand and waits for Mel to adjust. Mel shifts her thighs and groans as that changes the sensation inside.
“This feels different too. Still good different but like. A lot.”
“Yeah, even if you were having sex with a guy he should probably be doing this first before he sticks his dick in. For future reference.”
Mel pushes up her glasses and looks down her body at Trinity, “Is it the same if you use one of your dildos on me?”
The mental image of strapping Mel flashes in her mind and she almost moans out loud at the idea. “Yeah, uh. Yeah it would be the same. Just warming up before bigger penetration is a good idea.”
“I can feel that." She shimmies around on the bed and pulls a pillow down more under her head, squinting like she's deciding on something. "I think I’m adjusted now, what next?”
Trinity strokes her finger up and back in a “come here” motion. “Does that feel good?”
Mel looks thoughtful, “yes, but I thought I’m supposed to have a Gräfenberg spot?" She shifts her hips. "This feels good, but like it’s the same amount of pleasant everywhere. Not in one spot.”
“Everyone’s is somewhere different kind of. Let me try something else?” Trinity shifts her wrist a bit to the left and a bit deeper and strokes again.
“Oka-ayyyy," Mel's voice pitches, "wow, oh my god? Was that it?”
Trinity strokes that same spot again. “You tell me.”
“I think so, wow that felt like. Like, can you do that again?!” She sounds so enthusiastic that Trinity’s heart is bursting with affection. This is so damn cute and it’s healing something in her and she’ll do this all night if it means Mel keeps smiling and moaning like that at the same time.
Mel snakes her hand down to rub her clit and Trinity licks at her fingers just lightly to move them out of the way. “Let me?” And then Mel is moaning “unh-huh” and then she’s eating her coworker's pussy while she fingers it and God, that feels so fucking good.
Mel fists her hands in the sheets, twisting and bucking her hips as Trinity works. It's easy enough to keep up with Mel as she moves, keeping her clit centered under her tongue and the pressure even with her fingers, but when Mel starts whimpering, "Trinity? I think I need to-" Trinity pulls back and stares up at her from between her thighs, replacing her tongue with her other hand, fingers rubbing tight circles.
"It's okay, just let it happen," she pants desperately. "Totally normal, I promise-"
"A-are you sure? I don't want- ohmygod-"
Trinity surges forward, covering her clit with her tongue again and muffles it into her: "Come in my mouth, Mel-"
And she does, Mel jerks and thrashes and cries out, arching her back off of the bed as she squirts in Trinity's mouth, the shorter woman lapping hungrily at everything she offers.
When she comes down, Mel giggles out loud and then keeps laughing, which Trinity supposes is a normal reaction to endorphins flooding your system like that probably for the first time ever. She sits up and looks down at Mel, stroking gently over the tops of her thighs.
"How do you feel?"
Mel beams, "Really good, like I can't believe it can feel like that. Thank you, Trinity. So much." Her eyes look so grateful, so sated, so everything Trinity wanted in her own first time.
Trinity's heart and clit both jump at the words, and she inhales deep to stop herself from getting sentimental. It would be really unsexy to get misty-eyed right now. Underneath the mushiness, her own arousal wants to make itself known and she shifts to lay on her side across from Mel, rubbing her own thighs together. This isn't about her, this is about Mel. Who maybe probably needs a second after an orgasm that big.
Mel opens her eyes and looks expectantly into Trinity's. "Now what do we do? Should I do you now?"
Trinity wishes she could say yes, wishes this could be that easy, wishes she could just shove Mel's hand in her pants and not start hyper-ventilating, but she knows what will happen if she does. "Um, if you want to you can, but I don't like my clothes coming off so it uh, it's been hard for my partners in the past to-"
"That's okay," Mel sighs. "I'm really tired anyway." She lets herself sink into the pillows before she sits up with a jolt. "Oh, but if you really want me to, I can! I don't want to be selfish!"
Trinity pulls her back down by her shoulder and leaves her hand there, letting her thumb stroke back and forth. She looks there instead of in Mel's eyes when she asks "Um, I may have a compromise if you're up for it?"
Mel nods, her face in that compassionate-care, trusty "you can tell me," way and dammit that shouldn't work on her, Trinity is also a doctor. She should be immune to doctor tricks. But Mel holds her gaze with such kindness and patience in those soft hazel eyes that Trinity just asks.
"I have a vibrator I like to use on myself sometimes, it would be nice if you could stay while I use it?" It shouldn't feel embarrassing to say, but after so many "sorry, no time"s and "why can't you just let me do it?"s and "you don't even want me here"s it's gotten harder to just ask.
Mel nods eagerly, "I think I'd like that a lot. Can we kiss again too?"
Trinity smiles like she can't believe it. "Yeah," she nods. "Yeah, I'd really like that. Hold on-" She gets off the bed to rifle through the sex toy drawer she keeps in her closet, looking for the suction vibrator she's come to think of as Ol' Reliable.
When she gets back on the bed to lay across from Mel again, the taller woman asks "Can I see it?"
"Oh, uh. Yeah, here." She passes it to her.
"How does it work?" Mel turns it over in her hands, inspecting it with the precise scrutiny she would expect from a good doctor. It's kind of sweet that Mel can't turn it off outside of work.
"It uh, it just suctions. Like on my clit, here-" she presses the "on" button and the little machine hums to life. She guides the toy to the end of Mel's nose and lets it suck. "See?"
Mel laughs softly at the sensation as she pushes it away and wrinkles her nose. "You really like that?"
"Well it feels better when it's you know. But yeah, I like these more than normal vibrators."
"Do you have a lot of vibrators?" Mel asks curiously.
"Yeah, like an embarrassing amount probably. And other toys. I can show you sometime?"
"That could be fun!" Mel chirps, a beat passing before her voice drops, suddenly husky. "But I want to watch you use this one."
Trinity gulps at her tone, nodding as she slips the toy beneath her waistband. With her other hand, she grabs Mel by the back of the head and urges her forward so they can kiss.
The toy makes quick work of her, the heat from everything not taking long to stoke into something bigger before plateauing. Trinity would normally be embarrassed about it — how quickly she tends to come — but Mel watches her with a fascination that makes her feel like maybe Mel would be impressed instead of disappointed. It is nice to be with someone who doesn't care, or at least doesn't know to care.
Mel must be able to sense how in her own head about it Trinity is, because she hums into Trinity's mouth before ramping up her game. She flicks her tongue lightly over her lips, silently asking for Trinity to open before pressing in. Mel's hands hold her gently by the hips, softly feeling around to her back and ass — over her clothes — before she pulls back to speak, her tone so, so gentle.
"Trinity, I want to watch," she urges. "Show me."
It's enough to banish the inherent shame that always freezes over the intense heat in her body, and before she can feel awkward about it, she's coming; her free hand gripping tight to Mel's back while she whines into her neck.
When she comes down, she leaves her face buried in Mel's neck and hair, hiding. She turns the vibrator off and then it's silent save for the sounds of her catching her breath, waiting for Mel to say something. When she doesn't, Trinity pulls back.
"Hey, did you fall asleep?" she whispers.
"Hm? Oh, no I was just waiting. I didn't know what was next, but this is really nice so I don't mind," Mel responds casually, like they're not spooning intimately, Mel naked and holding Trinity in her arms. "So what is next?"
Trinity really doesn't know. Usually Yolanda leaves and Trinity showers alone and then goes to bed alone and feels weird alone. Maybe eats a snack, also alone. None of those feel like the right option though. "Uh, whatever you want? You can um, spend the night." She rolls onto her back to look at the ceiling instead of at Mel. "If you want."
Mel hums, thinking. "I'll go home," she decides. "I prefer to sleep in my own bed if I can help it. I can tolerate it for work, but I try not to if I don't have to."
Trinity pats a rhythm on her stomach awkwardly. "Yup," she says, popping the "P." "Makes sense." Here it comes, the 'this was fun, but let's pretend this didn't happen.' 'Let's keep this separate from work, yeah?' 'It's just casual, don't get needy.'
Mel doesn't say any of that though, she wriggles herself off of the bed and starts slipping her clothes back on. When she gets to her underwear, she holds it up and looks at Trinity. "These are uh, well wet, should I bother showering first? I didn't bring a change of clothes."
Trinity's a big girl who does not wallow in self pity because a pretty girl is leaving her alone — again — so she gets up and throws a pair of her own boyshorts underwear at Mel from her drawer. "There, just uh. Get 'em back to me whenever."
Mel drops her own underwear to catch the new ones, nearly fumbling them. She smiles and holds them up in awkward victory but drops the smile when she sees Trinity isn't looking at her. She quickly puts the boyshorts on then slips back into her jeans.
"Um, Trinity?"
The brunette still doesn't turn around from her underwear drawer.
Mel worries at her lip. "I had a lot of fun tonight," she says. Did she do something wrong? "Um, I'll see you tomorrow?"
Trinity perks up and turns around, "Whoa there, Melatonin, I know I'm good but I'm that good? Tomorrow? I mean, I'm down to hit it again but…"
"Oh, I meant I'll see you at work tomorrow?" She takes a beat before "Oh, but I do want to do this again!" she says excitedly, shaking her hands at her sides.
"Oh. Yeah, duh. Work. Obviously," Trinity sighs as she nods. "But yeah, I would be okay with doing this again too," she says, breaking eye contact and rubbing her neck.
"Great!" Mel chirps. "I'll see you at work?"
She's so chipper, so genuine, Trinity feels bad for being the bad guy. She should grow up. Simple miscommunications get simple redirects. Mel isn't playing mind games, she isn't dragging her around, she's not punishing her attempts at intimacy by leaving. She's just a nice girl who had a nice time and Trinity is being the weird one. She should let herself enjoy it.
"Yeah," Trinity says, stepping forward to sling an arm around Mel's waist and walk her to the front door. "I'll see you at work. Get home safe."
"Thank you!" Mel says as she packs up her stuff.
When the door closes behind her, Trinity sighs. She waits for it to hit her, the loneliness. The hole she needs to fill with a scalpel. She stares at the door but nothing happens. She feels… okay. Mel left her alone, yes, she realizes — but she didn't put her down when she did it. She just. Wanted to sleep in her own bed. And she wants to do this again. And she said "thank you," which never happens.
She's in the shower getting ready for her own bedtime when her phone buzzes. She picks it up with a wet hand, "still busy?" - Yolanda.
Oh how the tables have turned. She puts the phone down and finishes getting ready for bed, lets herself take longer than she usually does. It's petty, but God does it feel good to gloat.
"i thought we were keeping it casual?" she taps back, several minutes after Yolanda's initial text. She smirks as the "read" notification appears under her message. She's about to get back in bed when her phone buzzes again. Damn, she really is desperate. Must've been a dogshit day at work for her which means it will be a lot of catch up for her tomorrow-
It's from Mel. "I had a really great time, thanks for helping me cross that off of my list! Looking forward to the next time! Good night, Trinity!"
Oh. She stares at the screen. Looking forward to the next time. Huh. Trinity feels the smile sneak its way onto her face. She nods to no one. "Cool," she whispers out loud. "Next time."