Chapter Text
“Do you think this is a simple thing, huh? I can’t be with people like you. Making mistakes and then being carefree? I reminded you so many times and you still did it. You are not competent in this field and I won’t ever get along with someone like you, such a useless man!”
“Kihyun, don’t say something like that.”
“Don’t, Minhyuk, don’t. Stop saying that we are a match. It is not. I won’t ever like this guy. Never!”
“Sir Hyunwoo, please don’t take his words seriously. He just, you know, has to be perfect in everything and…”
“It’s okay, Minhyuk. Don’t worry.”
He cracked his eyes open slowly, slightly blurry finding the scenery of his sleeping boyfriend facing him. It was the usual scene in his daily life but not this time. These days, Kihyun found himself waking up in the middle of the night because he has been dreaming about the same scene almost every day. Guilt crawls under his feet every time he watches Hyunwoo this close but he could do nothing about that. Helplessly accepting his own mistake.
Hyunwoo was sleeping soundly, having deep sleep with his lips part slightly open. His masculine features look sharper in close, something that Kihyun loves the most. His hair looked so messy but strangely made his face more handsome. His shoulder looked so wide at that angle. He wore the usual white shirt and short beige pants while sleeping. His arm draped around Kihyun’s waist while his other arm was lying under Kihyun’s neck bringing his lover closer to his chest. He looked so peaceful. What a wonderful good night. Sleeping on the same bed at night is one of Kihyun’s favorite times although he does nothing but adores the man while the other is sleeping. They are both busy people so their home is the only place where they can rest but in fact, they can’t do many things either. It adds more void in his heart because it is supposed to be the place they could spend time together. That was why Kihyun finally decided to move to Hyunwoo’s place to fix the problem. However, unfortunately, it doesn’t fix the problem. They can’t spend much time together due to business. Moreover, due to their situation in the public as enemies, it is difficult to handle.
Kihyun sighed softly, remembering his dream just now. Wondering what Hyunwoo was thinking when he said those harsh words that day. It happened almost 2 years ago and the day after the incident was the anniversary date of Hyunwoo asking Kihyun to be his boyfriend. It became the most awkward day of his entire dating life because Hyunwoo didn’t say much but still came to his place to celebrate it together and then enjoy his homemade dinner. Hyunwoo brought him a baby’s breath flowers bouquet and gave him a kiss on his cheek saying ‘I love you’ clumsily before he went home. It was awkward yet romantic but it was romantic yet felt far away. Kihyun regretted anything that came out of his mouth on that day.
Hyunwoo is so quiet sometimes and Kihyun just knows that if Hyunwoo is quiet, then something is bothering his mind. Kihyun never has the courage to ask him about it, because, even if Hyunwoo is quiet, he always smiles as if nothing happened and then hugs Kihyun closer to swaying their bodies together. He would say ‘it’s okay’ as if he knows that Kihyun is thinking too much. However, it puts so much strain on Kihyun because he feels like he never tries to understand Hyunwoo but the man always understands him. Hyunwoo is known as an assertive leader in his work but he is such a lovely man in daily life.
“What’s wrong? Are you awake?” Hyunwoo took a deep breath as he hardly opened his eyes to see his lover. Kihyun gasped as he realized Hyunwoo woke up when he unconsciously squeezed hard on his shirt.
“Sorry, I woke you up.” He said softly, trying to hide his troubled face by nestling closer to Hyunwoo. Pretending to go back to sleep.
“Something happens?” Hyunwoo tried to see his face, still hardly opening his eyes so he squinted to prevent sudden light from bothering his eyes. Kihyun shook his head lightly and moved closer, still stubbornly hiding his face. Hyunwoo didn’t catch enough of what was happening because he just woke up so suddenly without warning. He ran his hand to Kihyun’s back and caressed him gently while feeling his eyelids drop heavily. Due to the tiredness all over his body, he couldn’t handle the sleepiness. “Back to sleep, babe. You have a packed schedule tomorrow.”
“Yes.”
It took less than a minute for Hyunwoo to fall back into a deep sleep. His hand stopped caressing and his breath became rhythmic. Kihyun peered at him carefully before trying to sleep but it wasn’t easy. His mind wandered around all night until tiredness controlled his body and forcefully made his brain go to rest. The same dream came, reminding him of the fact that this hidden relationship is his fatal mistake.
Kihyun woke up at the same exact time every day. Even though he was so tired and lacked sleep time, his body is quite well trained with early function in the morning as if it is scheduled. One of the reasons is that Kihyun is living together with Hyunwoo now. Both are busy men and someone has to do the job such as preparing breakfast or simply preparing their clothes before leaving for work. Normally, Kihyun is the one who does the morning routine while Hyunwoo is the one who makes dinner for him at night. There is also a case that they will prepare everything together so they can spend more time together in their comfort zone before going to war outside. However, it never happened lately due to their clashing schedules. Most of the time, one of them will leave faster or sleep first so it is hard to find the right time to be together, except sleeping. But who wants it that way anyway?
As he opened his eyes, he was confused about the situation. He was so sure that Hyunwoo hugged him like a log last night and it is always like that. Kihyun is used to waking up in that kind of position with warmth around his body and the messy hair of Hyunwoo poking his cheek in his first scene but strangely on that morning, there was only himself lying on the bed and Hyunwoo was nowhere to be found. He searched around the apartment and still couldn’t find his lover although it was still six in the morning.
Kihyun found out there was only one apartment key left in the nightstand dresser and there were no Hyunwoo’s car keys. They always put the keys, both their car keys and apartment keys, there like a routine. He wondered if Hyunwoo had been leaving for work early in the morning because it was unusual to have Hyunwoo going first. It became strange because Hyunwoo never left anywhere without telling him. He checked on his phone but no messages either.
Kihyun left their apartment after preparing himself well with a nice suit and neat hair and instantly switching on to his usual elite face after he stepped out of the room. It just becomes a habit out of his consciousness. He drove to the office carefully and obeyed the rules like the meticulous person he is. He arrived at the office also at the exact time and most of the employees already knew his arrival time and expected him to be in the place right before eight.
He didn’t find Hyunwoo around the room at the moment he arrived so Kihyun went ahead to his office room immediately. He didn’t think much about it, just guessing that Hyunwoo had something to do in the office so he left first although he felt disappointed that Hyunwoo did not tell him about it. He put his belongings on his desk, ready to turn on his personal laptop. As he wanted to type the password, he noticed a pink sticky note patched on his desk drawer. He took it and found out there was a handwritten message there.
From your secret admirer.
“What?” He asked, half confused, half interested. What kind of person dared to put something like that on his desk?
He noticed a small gap between his drawer and then opened it slowly. As it opened, a single branched rose bouquet showed its presence with a small card attached to its base tied by a black ribbon. He frowned deeply, wondering why there was a rose inside his desk. He detached the card to read its content.
How about going out for dinner tonight?
Kihyun shortly switched off as he read a familiar handwritten note there. A small smile formed on his lips unconsciously as he smelled the flower and felt how fresh the smell was. There was a specific happy feeling inside and he just needed to make sure of it. He just needed to see the man right away.
After he stepped out of his office room, Kihyun found Hyunwoo talking with his assistant manager Chae Hyungwon in front of his office room, which is side by side with his own room. Most of his teams were already present at their respective desks but he couldn’t find Minhyuk anywhere. He pretended to scan the room because Hyunwoo seemed so busy talking with Hyungwon and he found Jooheon gasping, surprised looking at him.
“Jooheon, do I need to repeat myself or do you just love lectures from me?”
Jooheon pursed his lips nervously. Once again, Kihyun caught his empty cereal bowl showing on his desk. Kihyun always told him to have breakfast in the proper place, which is the office cafeteria. The man had already given him so many lectures about mannerisms in the morning up until now such as polite greetings and body posture. Kihyun seemed to take notice of him since he made mistakes on his job the other day. “I’m sorry, Sir Kihyun. I had my breakfast at the cafeteria. This is just… I want to wash this later but...” He grinned widely, afraid of almost mentioning Hyunwoo who called him before he could wash the bowl so that’s why it was still there. Precisely, he was afraid of pushing a red button if he mentioned Hyunwoo in front of Kihyun.
“Clean it after this. Asap.”
Kihyun told him with a loud and authoritative voice that was actually heard by most of the teams there, especially Hyunwoo who paused his talks with Hyungwon for a second before continuing. Hyungwon could see his eyes twitching at the same moment Kihyun was done talking. Jooheon just nodded awkwardly. He could say no more, afraid of adding more hot tension there.
“He is a grown-ass man, Kihyun. He knows what he’s doing.” Hyunwoo took a slight peek at him with a flat expression and then proceeded to read a paper that Hyungwon gave to him and then signed it. “Stop talking like you are his mother.”
“What?”
They stared at each other intensively as if they were gonna kill each other. Maybe no one ever knows that there is another meaning behind it.
Both team members held their breath, knowing that there would be another argument between the managers just because of a simple cereal bowl. It was worrying that the arguments would result in a bad situation for their jobs due to their competitive side. It is already clear that both of them can’t stand each other’s existence in the public. Even a simple thing can make them hate each other more. It doesn’t concern the jobs so honestly, it was useless to debate.
“Don’t you notice you make him stressed? You always give him lectures in the morning as if he always makes mistakes. It isn’t needed.” Hyunwoo let out a tired sigh while handing over documents to Hyungwon. His assistant was about to interrupt but he signed him to stop.
“Well, I just do anything that is important because I know you can’t train your new recruit properly.” Kihyun folded his arms over his chest, lifting his eyebrows, chin raised up, looking at him challenged. It is always the same scene of Kihyun who loves to jump into every single scenario that he thinks sucks. “If not, he won’t make me write off 2 billion because of his mistake. You know I won’t tolerate mistakes.”
Hyunwoo rolled his eyes but was still trying to hold back his emotion. He put his hands on his waist, irritated. Kihyun is always like that, often mentioning past mistakes to everybody, moreover to Hyunwoo. In front of the public. “He is part of my team. He is my responsibility so back off.”
Jooheon has been stressed again because he was reminded of the same damn mistake. He wanted to apologize (once again) to his boss but suddenly Changkyun held his arm to prevent him from doing it. Everybody knows that the bad tension there was not because of Jooheon, it was just because the managers wanted to cancel each other out by taking advantage of other people’s situations. Minhyuk just stepped into the room bringing a bunch of paperwork, confused as he saw the familiar scene of his daily office life. He sighed tiredly and reached out to Changkyun, asking about what happened with them ‘again’.
“Still fighting? It’s 9 in the morning, guys.” Just before Kihyun wanted to throw his attack, someone came in and interrupted the tension. Most of the team members were sighing in relief at the sudden coming of a bulky handsome man into their space. Maybe this is the only man who can make the situation melt into better air.
“Oh. Hello, Sir Hoseok. Why are you here?” Minhyuk greeted the man as he patted his arm and asked about his day. The man smiled widely, noticing Kihyun let out a heavy breath while Hyunwoo was about to go take some blank papers on the nearest shelf. Their fight was aborted abruptly.
“Why are you still asking, Minhyuk? You know it. Of course, I want to greet your cute manager there. I haven’t seen him for the last 2 months. He’s gonna be mad at me,” said Hoseok playfully as he winked at Kihyun while throwing a heart finger. Kihyun huffed and shook his head in disbelief at someone’s sudden visit. Immediately, he changed his direction and walked further to reach his office room because he wanted to avoid the annoying man for now. “Wait, Kihyun. Why do you always go away when I’m present? Right, Changkyunie?” He said it while shifting his attention to the youngest of them while Changkyun just grinned awkwardly.
“I have no time for your flirty ass, Hoseok.” Kihyun stared at him sharply for a second before proceeding to walk away. It was true that the sudden appearance of the man called Hoseok would make the managers’ useless debate to be over because Kihyun would choose to avoid Hoseok due to his persistence to flirt with him.
“So stingy. You haven’t heard me asking for a date for these past 2 months. Don’t you miss me?”
A bunch of blank paper fell to the floor as if they weren’t held properly by someone. All of them shifted their attention to the sudden sound and found Hyunwoo disoriented looking at his own feet. It was so comical when there were two seconds of silence until Hyunwoo was back to his senses and taking the paper. Jooheon came over to him asking what he needed and helped him. Hyunwoo just told him that he needed to print out something.
“You know the answer. It is a no. Just go back, and do your jobs. Your team is waiting. Don’t waste my time.” He raised his pointer finger to give him a final alarm.
Hoseok giggled as he already expected the same reaction from Kihyun every time he came to their office floor just to tease him with flirty words and all. “Ey, it’s so unfair. You don’t want to waste your time with me but you waste your time fighting with this man. I am offended.” He came over to Hyunwoo who was about to go back to his office room and then patted his shoulder. Hyunwoo looked at him in disbelief at how widely Hoseok grinned at him as if he was trying to say something troublesome unprovoked. “Yo, Hyunwoo, my man.”
“Oh. What is it? There is a meeting at 10, I know it.” Hyunwoo tried to sound as usual but actually, he felt uncomfortable about how Hoseok looked at him like he knew something.
He exclaimed happily, “Yes! Don’t worry about that. I just came here to see my little cutey right there.” He pointed at Kihyun who walked into his office room just now. He chuckled as he saw Kihyun roll his eyes, feeling enough of his prank. “He rejected me again. All your team members here are witnesses to the 228th time Kihyun rejected my feelings. I’m so sad. I need comfort right now.”
Hyunwoo looked at him, questioning himself about how Hoseok could look like he doesn’t have heartbreak at all. “You counted it?”
“I’m the Investment manager here, so I do remember.” He lifted his shoulders playfully and didn’t look serious at all. There was no connection between his position with this matter. “Isn’t it weird? It is already close to the 300th time and he still rejected me. I just wonder if Kihyun has someone he crushes on. If I know he has someone he likes, maybe I’ll surrender.”
Jooheon stepped into the conversation all of a sudden, looking at Hoseok hopefully with so much spirit in his eyes. “You can’t do it, Sir Hoseok! Don’t give up! He will like you someday! If you keep pushing, he will melt day by day!”
Hoseok nodded understandably, feeling proud of Jooheon who looked so innocent there. Meanwhile, Hyunwoo frowned deeply at his statement. “Thank you, Jooheon. I like your spirit.” He looked around the room and found all the teams paid attention to him, so Hoseok found new entertainment. “So, do you guys know about Kihyun’s love life? Maybe, has he ever been seen dating someone or having a lovey-dovey conversation with someone?” Most of them shook their heads, puzzled. None of them see Kihyun being so lovely because most of the time he is a strict person, especially about work. Hoseok was waiting for the best response from Minhyuk who was always beside Kihyun most of the time but the man knew nothing either. “So, how about you, Hyunwoo? Do you know something? Any kind of information is appreciated.”
Hyunwoo just hated the fact that he couldn’t say anything. He also hated the fact that he was involved in Hoseok’s playful questions. “His private life is not my business. Just ask him by yourself.”
“I do ask him but he never tells me.” Hoseok shook his head, pursing his lips, pretending to look sad about it. “So, I wonder if you guys know something, especially you, Hyunwoo. You two are pretty close, aren’t you?”
“So now you think we’re close? Are you blind?” Hyunwoo was clearly showing an irritated face just now. He had enough of Hoseok’s giggling so he went away and closed his office room door tightly.
“So sensitive. Sometimes you two resemble each other.”
“I think you are doing it overboard, Sir Hoseok.” Hyungwon chirped in, a little bit worried about his day. There was a high possibility that Hyunwoo would force them to do overtime again. “You know they hate each other and still you said something like that.”
“I was joking. They fight too much and make a mess everywhere. Don’t you agree? I got some complaints from the other managers about them.”
“Have they always been like that since the beginning, sir?” Jooheon asked curiously. He doesn’t really know about both managers’ relationships all this time because he is a new recruit for about 6 months. Hyunwoo told him that they are always like that and even if there is a worse day than usual between them. Due to the big mistake he made, Kihyun always paid attention to him and gave him a heart attack almost every day. It was worrying because Hyunwoo would interrupt between them.
Compared to anyone there, Hoseok is one of the employees who has worked there the longest since he graduated college, even before Hyunwoo and Kihyun became the managers. “I’m not really sure but I think it wasn’t this bad before.”
Jooheon nodded in understanding. “Since when did Sir Kihyun turn down your love confession?”
Hoseok burst out laughing. He patted gently the confused Jooheon while still laughing. “So, you think the confession is real?”
“I-Is it not?” Jooheon almost screamed as he was surprised but Hoseok put his finger on his lips to make him turn down his voice. He ordered them to keep quiet about it. “Then why are you doing it?”
“Because it’s fun.”
Hoseok walked away to return to his work while laughing all the way, leaving the rest of them dazed.
~~oOo~~
Kihyun just finished another packed meeting with the operational team. He walked back to his office room with heavy steps and nonstop tired sighs. He threw himself to his chair and then massaged his eyebrows continuously. Following the same routine as an office worker, Kihyun didn’t have much time to rest, moreover to ask about the thing inside his desk to someone. He opened his drawer again, staring dearly at the bouquet but feeling a bit sad about it. After the last fight with him in the morning, he didn’t have a chance to meet Hyunwoo personally although their rooms are side by side. Their schedules always overlapped most of the time.
This is the reason why he hates this secret relationship. He doesn’t even have the opportunity to interact with Hyunwoo normally . Just like this morning. He has some childish wishes too, like wanting to be like other couples, such as having lunch together with your partner or simply coming home together. As simple as that. He often sees some office couples doing that in this building. However, after he imagined all the things in his head, he felt disappointed in himself. He doesn’t deserve those kinds of things because he is the main reason for this misery. After all, it does not fit his image at all.
Kihyun noticed a lunch box on his desk which he asked for from the office boy since he couldn’t have lunch at the right time. It was already past 2 pm and he couldn’t even feel hungry anymore. However, Kihyun is a good man who will appreciate everything so he will eat the food right away. He went out of his room bringing his lunch and found Hyunwoo just arrived followed by Jooheon from behind. They didn’t have a chance to meet in the eyes even for a second.
“Where are you going?” When Minhyuk asked him, he was bringing some hard folders in his hands. Kihyun showed the lunch box to him.
“I’ll have lunch for a bit.”
Minhyuk looked for the nearest wall clock. “Wow, that’s so late. Okay.”
When he was about to walk out, Hyunwoo popped up from his office door to call Hyungwon to bring some notes. No one ever knows that Kihyun put so much hope in his heart that Hyunwoo would call him instead. Such a childish hope. Of course, It won’t happen.
No one was present in the office cafeteria except himself. No wonder because lunch time has already passed, but it is common for Kihyun to have lunch at that hour due to packed meetings and piles of work mostly at the beginning and the end of the month. The accounting team is always busy during that period due to the monthly reporting process.
After finishing his lunch, Kihyun considered going back to his office immediately. He remembered that he had to check some documents from this morning’s reconciliation meeting. Right after he took a few steps, he felt his body swaying hard without notice, spinning around without direction so fast. He could feel a tight grasp around his left wrist, pulling and bringing him to the filling room. So fast like a flash. Due to the sudden force, Kihyun couldn’t help but follow the flow. He could hear the door close. No one was there beside them.
“What the hell–” He gasped, couldn’t hold cursing as someone taller trapped him between the cold wall and the broad chest at the corner of the room. He blinked faster as he realized the familiar scent of the man that forced him to fit the space. His defense switched off as he looked up, finding the man facing down. His voice got softer. “You give me a heart attack.”
“I always do, don’t I?” He said so confidently. He slid down holding onto the wall to meet Kihyun’s eyes level so they could stare at each other straight. That’s the usual thing Hyunwoo would do when he needs affirmation from his lover. No one would interrupt them this time. There were only silent drawers and a stack of papers around them. It is always the same moment of Kihyun shifted to his soft side with big puppy eyes for Hyunwoo in an instant as their eyes met and no one slipped between. He easily got lost in the deep of Hyunwoo’s eyes looking at him. Fluttering yet calming. He just loves it. Like he has a totally different personality when he is with Hyunwoo. No answer to the question yet no one minds it. “So, babe, I need a statement.”
“About what?” Kihyun frowned deeply but didn’t want to lose eye contact with Hyunwoo. Feeling a little bit happy that finally, Hyunwoo paid attention to him completely.
“How come Hoseok managed to confess to you about 228 times? How come I didn’t know that it was the 228th time? If I knew it, then I don’t know what I’m gonna do to him. Purposefully manipulating fund transactions to piss him off? I am a master of doing that.”
Maybe it was the best moment of the day as he saw Kihyun have sudden small laughs making his cheeks pinkish. His lips curved a bit though he was still pissed off about the situation. Hyunwoo loves his laughs and possibly no one knows how pretty Kihyun is when he is smiling because he never shows it to others easily. Kihyun tends to be stiff and straight all day in the office due to his perfect working attitude. Hyunwoo is a lucky man who can see it most of the time, especially when they are alone.
“Ridiculous. You know the answer. You know what my statement will be, and don’t dare to purposely make a mistake to piss him off because you know who you are facing now. It’s gonna be a problem for me, too.” Kihyun stated while noticing some wrinkles on Hyunwoo’s suit and trying to make it neat as it was supposed to be. Reminding him about the morning that Hyunwoo wasn’t there so he couldn’t fix the clothes as usual. They did not have breakfast together either.
If this is a normal situation, Kihyun would be so strict about anything, and Hyunwoo who says that he would do something troublesome will end them up in arguments. However, Kihyun just knows that Hyunwoo didn’t seriously say that point. He just becomes a little bit annoying when he is jealous yet Kihyun doesn’t mind it. He develops a big tolerance for the man.
“I don’t know anything. It gives me a headache all day and the worst is he kept asking me about you during our meeting this morning. Are you sure you know nothing? I’m sure he has someone he has a crush on because he keeps rejecting me. It’s 228 times, Hyunwoo. 228 times! Like hell, he kept saying that.” He exclaimed furiously while watching his lover who didn’t even seriously pay attention to his complaints.
Nothing came out from Kihyun yet. He was busy tidying anything he could see on Hyunwoo. A little smirk formed as he faced the man, adjusting his glasses for a better view. Hyunwoo loves those glasses on Kihyun these days. He looks cute and bossy. “Do I look great today?”
Hyunwoo frowned, a little bit lost in the conversation yet still having time to scan Kihyun all the way. Pretty face with neat hair and glasses on. Red top and black pants. Hyunwoo almost could sneak a peek at his white chest with that angle. Perfect. All kills. He is whipped. “Of course you are but it doesn’t have any connection with my concern now.”
“It has. I need to look good today because someone dared to put flowers in my drawer and ask for dinner.” Kihyun stated in confidence, raising his eyebrows and looking at Hyunwoo in anticipation. “Not so different handwriting? From your secret admirer? That’s so predictable. You need to work harder to make good surprises.”
Hyunwoo forgot about Hoseok instantly as he saw Kihyun giggling. He just needs to admit that Kihyun’s presence could cure anything. Or maybe, this secret relationship makes it like that, which is every single moment becomes precious. “So I don’t get a compliment for my hard work? Not all florists opened at that kind of hour and I was risking my life sneaking to your room at dawn. That was challenging.”
“Because of that, you forgot to put your underwear in the washer and didn’t close the damn closet. That’s the main problem, Hyunwoo.” Kihyun grinned wider as noticing Hyunwoo squinting his eyes.
“I’m trying to be romantic here. Please cooperate.” Hyunwoo clicked his tongue before bringing their bodies close and hugging, gently leaning their bodies against the wall. He let out a sigh after sticking his lips to Kihyun’s temples, giving kisses right there always. Actually, it has been a difficult year for them. Hyunwoo becomes busy and busier, and so does Kihyun. They don’t have much time to spend together although they live together, it doesn’t feel like enough lately. They just spend their quality time on the bed at night for about 5 minutes before their eyes couldn’t even see each other well due to tiredness. The weekend is not an option because they still work on the weekend. Packed schedules, stressful jobs, and less time to rest are perfect situations to make their life empty. Moreover, this is a secret relationship. They couldn’t interact normally. “It has been a long time since we had dinner outside. I’d booked your favorite place.”
“The place you confessed to me?” Kihyun’s voice was muffled as he snuggled to the broad shoulders, taking advantage of Hyunwoo’s small kisses as much as he could. They don’t have much time to do skinship like this except for short pecks in the morning before leaving their home. Sometimes Hyunwoo is so persistent to have Kihyun a bit longer in his embrace but time never allows them. It is also hard to find a short break time like this one.
Kihyun could feel Hyunwoo nodding to answer his question. It brought back memories of Hyunwoo inviting him for dinner for the first time, looking so nervous as Kihyun arrived at the place. It has become a memorable place. It was a nice dinner with high-quality food and wine, and Kihyun didn’t even realize that there was no one around at the time Hyunwoo told him about his feelings toward the younger. No music played, just a night breeze that came in between. They didn’t serve as managers back then and had time to be spent together longer. Hyunwoo took his hand and kissed it like he meant it, making Kihyun malfunction in the crowd. The red roses presented a necessary existence to make the feelings burst. They went home holding hands like a teenager in love, forgetting all about the bad things in the world. Kihyun remembered it so well that his hands were sweaty and he was sure that his face was dead red like a beetroot after Hyunwoo kissed his lips gently in front of his apartment door before they separated. It was so damn romantic and Kihyun never thought that he could experience that kind of love life due to his straightforward strict working attitude. He was so excited to reveal their relationship with Hyunwoo to anyone. He wondered what people thought about them and their soon-to-be serious relationship until he was the one who destroyed it instead.
“That’s my favorite place ever.”
Hyunwoo released his embrace to look at his lover. His cheeks were beaming. “It has always been your favorite place since the beginning, right? I saw you come to that place often before we were dating.”
Kihyun gave him a small smile. Hyunwoo may never know why it became his favorite place. “Yes. That’s why we have to go there tonight. You have invited me. Be responsible.”
“Of course. I’ll wait for you there… as usual .”
‘As usual’ somehow doesn’t sound good as if it always happens like that. They stared at each other for a while, thinking about many things. Sometimes sneaking to have alone time in a public place like this makes them think about the future. Precisely, the continuation of their relationship in the future. There is always something that they can’t tell each other because the relationship gets hidden. Kihyun is always the one who looks sadder every time the fact hits him harder and Hyunwoo never has the heart to talk about it more. However, there is only one thing: Hyunwoo is genuinely in love with Kihyun. It kills any bad thoughts.
Hyunwoo patted his head gently, giving him the reassurance of their existence. Kihyun squeezed on his shirt as if telling him to not go. Hyunwoo took a chance to kiss him yet was a little bit surprised as his glasses bumped into his cheek. “I love it when you wear glasses but they are bothering me now, babe.”
He took the glasses out of Kihyun’s beautiful face and put them in his pocket before crashing their lips together impatiently, making Kihyun struggle against the wall. It has been a while since they kissed passionately hot like this time. No one knows how much they missed it. Hyunwoo took control by grabbing onto his nape to deepen the kiss and holding on to his waistline until Kihyun tiptoed as the force got stronger. He ran his hands to his shoulders to maintain his position as Hyunwoo slipped his tongue inside to taste Kihyun’s tempting lips, making him melt into the sensation. It was great. Kihyun was out of breath but managed to kiss him back with the same level of excitement. It was so endearing but what people say if they see them kissing like this? The perfectionist side of Kihyun couldn’t relate. He would deny the fact. He hates his own thoughts, sometimes.
Kihyun returned to his office room with his usual elite face, trying to look like nothing happened. This tough side of Kihyun always looks unwavering whatever happens even if he could feel confused stares from some people he passed by who were peeking at his reddened lips as if he just did an unforgivable sin. Maybe it was just his imagination due to over-awareness of his surroundings after sneaking to have a moment with Hyunwoo. The scenario was Kihyun would come to the room first and Hyunwoo would be there 5 minutes after him. It supposes to be not suspicious.
“Oh finally, you come back,” Minhyuk exclaimed as Kihyun stepped inside their work area. Most of his underlings were busy with their own jobs so no one paid attention. “I just want to—” Minhyuk was about to walk over bringing some notes but suddenly stopped his movement as scanning his boss’s face and frowned.
“W-what?” As the stare from Minhyuk got intense, Kihyun didn’t realize that he gulped nervously. Minhyuk is quite an observant person so sometimes it makes him wonder what he is thinking.
On the other hand, Hyunwoo just arrived at the room like an unusually cool man, with his signature loud steps while watching his wristwatch as if time is an important thing right now, telling people that he is so super busy by his overflowing leader aura. He was walking past them casually at the same time Minhyuk tilted his head and said, “I think something is missing? Wait, your glasses. I thought you wore them just now.”
A loud thud was heard at the same time Kihyun was choking and then coughing as he got a heart attack caused by the statement. It was from Hyunwoo who accidentally hit his shoe tip on Hyungwon’s small bin and almost made his leg stuck. All the eyes shifted their attention to the front, watching a comical moment. What a day. Yet no one’s laughing.
“Or am I mistaken? Never mind. There is an urgent issue now.” Minhyuk swayed his hand in the air to erase whatever-something that almost made Kihyun choke himself to death. He brought some documents and showed some notes but Kihyun didn’t really pay attention yet and peered at Hyunwoo who was being asked by Hyungwon if he was okay. Their eyes met for a few seconds when Hyunwoo played a strict leadership role by calling Jooheon to come over to his office room immediately and asking for the month’s budget report. Just before he came into his personal room, Hyunwoo tapped lightly on his pocket, signaling Kihyun that his glasses were there safely. He noticed Hyunwoo’s teasing smile right before he disappeared. Kihyun sighed loudly.
“You okay?” Minhyuk glanced over and Kihyun nodded to try to focus on his assistant. He pursed his lips nervously. “The chief called you when you were having lunch. I found something so I think he wants to talk about this.” Minhyuk was once again showing some notes on the printed accounting balance report. Finally, Kihyun paid attention to the paper. Gradually, his beaming face became darker. “We’re in trouble, Kihyun.”
~~oOo~~
Jooheon was looking around, not knowing what he should do as Hyunwoo was observing his manual report. Due to the last mistake he made, Jooheon becomes more detailed in anything and somewhat makes the report confusing with unnecessary information. Actually, being detailed is good (somehow Kihyun’s lectures made a big impact on Jooheon) but Hyunwoo doesn’t really need all those things. The way Hyunwoo does his job is so different from Kihyun so it feels a little bit off looking at how Jooheon does his report. Yet being a part of the finance department demands you to be detailed but a load of big transactions piles up if you do unnecessary things too much. Hyunwoo prefers to use efficient problem-solving than this one.
“Since when did you wear glasses, sir?” Jooheon chirped when Hyunwoo was about to put some notes for the must-be-revised part of the report. Hyunwoo glanced at him confused because what the heck since when he is wearing glasses and oh hell no he didn’t wear anything on his face. Noticing the confused stares of his boss, Jooheon pointed out something poking out beside the stack of papers on the drawers behind Hyunwoo’s desk. It has a thin round frame, not so much showing yet shown. Hyunwoo blinked a few times, trying to play it cool. He just didn’t expect that his subordinate could see it there. A few moments before, Hyunwoo was chuckling to himself while watching the glasses on his hands at the same time a knock on his door interrupted his giggle and Jooheon was standing hopefully in the doorway. So, he tried to hide it swiftly wherever the place he could find to hide it and didn’t expect it could be seen. Such a careless act of his.
Jooheon was looking at him, innocently waiting for his answer.
“Nope. You are wrong. Those are not glasses. Those are—” Just in time of Hyunwoo thinking hard for excuses, there was a fuss loudly heard from outside his personal room. They looked at each other puzzled, wondering what happened outside.
He could hear loud yelling beside his room which is known as Kihyun’s personal office room. He wondered at heart but he could do nothing about it due to his position as Kihyun’s fatal enemy in the office so he is supposed to ignore whatever is happening around the room beside. However, sooner or later, Hyunwoo was disturbed by whatever extreme sounds from the side room. He finished the notes quickly and gave them to Jooheon. “Revise based on my notes. Then I need to see the progress of the procurement tender. Let me see it.”
He got up and walked faster out of the room with the camouflage to see the tender progress that must proceed at Jooheon’s desk. Hyunwoo tried to be unbothered by some crowds gossiping around the corner. They looked worriedly at the opened door of Kihyun’s room. Hyungwon, who is rarely caring about the other side, looked a little bit anxious. Hyunwoo walked faster to Jooheon’s desk, which is side by side with Hyungwon’s, without saying anything. Jooheon was baffled at the scene and asked the assistant manager.
“Seems like Jiwon made a big mistake. It leads to unknown losses that probably will result in vendor payment failure. The chief gave hard complaints and Sir Kihyun is mad like crazy right now.” Explained by Hyungwon to Jooheon who looked so pale as he remembered how scary Kihyun is when he is mad. Moreover, the mistake this time was considered more than fatal.
“Oh my goodness.” Jooheon gulped hard, worriedly glancing at the room in question. “He is gonna be roasted alive, right.”
“I think this is beyond roasting. Just hearing the sound makes me anxious.” Hyungwon peeked at Hyunwoo who looks so flat without expression. It was true that it would result in more than roasting. Kihyun was yelling in high notes and his words didn’t sound good to hear, most intimidating and giving pressure. “This is gonna be a problem for us, too, Hyunwoo. We might be cannot process the transaction.”
Hyunwoo sighed heavily, signaling Jooheon to hurriedly show the procurement tender progress. He looked like not really care about what was happening. “Let them fix it. It’s nothing to do with us. It’s their problem.”
Hyungwon pursed his lips, thinking. It didn’t sound like Hyunwoo at all. Most of the time, even if Hyunwoo is a quite troublesome leader, he is famous as a kind and generous person that will help other people in need (although they are not part of his team), that’s why Hyunwoo is loved by most of the employees. However, Hyungwon didn’t think about it that much, cause it was Kihyun they were talking about so it feels normal.
“Already 5 vendors have applied to our website. Information from the procurement team said,” Jooheon proceeded to explain something showing on his computer while Hyunwoo standing behind him nodding. “This is gonna be our bulk purchase this year so they have concerns about our ongoing integrated system, sir.”
While they were talking, Kihyun’s voice from his room was echoing. Actually, it was a distraction to Hyunwoo. He twitched his eyebrow a few times. It brought back memories.
(“You are one of the seniors here and still you made these kinds of mistakes? Do you think working here is a joke for you or what? I’ve told you, all my teams, to be aware of what you are doing!”)
Hyunwoo continued to focus, “Okay, what is their concern?”
(“Don’t say that to me! Those are not appropriate to be reasons. Don’t work if you can’t do these simple things. Just be a useless person out there. Do you know? You messed up all.”)
Jooheon held his breath and said weakly between the yelling, “Sir Kihyun hasn’t approved the last timeline we propose so the IT team is now holding up the progress. If it doesn’t continue this week, it’s gonna be a problem. We won’t make it until the tender is settled.” At the same time, he took the proposed timeline paper out of his drawer and showed it to his boss. “I was thinking of asking for his approval today but…” The sudden silence of Jooheon was so contrasting with the yells.
(“Listen. I’ve told every single one of you to be careful and follow up on the details, so what did you do? Why can’t you do that? WHY? Explain to me!”)
Hyunwoo sighed. He looked around at the Accounting and Finance working area. The atmosphere was bad. He knew that most of them were worrying about the situation although Hyunwoo was more worried about something else. No one could stop Kihyun at this point and it would result in something overboard, just the same thing over and over would happen. Even so, Minhyuk was seen trying to interrupt yet Kihyun threw him out of the room with his intimidating words.
(“Just in time I delegated this work to you and you disappointed me. I believed in you and you did something I hate the most. You know I won’t tolerate mistakes. Do you want me to be strict so you can do your job properly? A warning letter is enough for you?”)
“Give it to me,” Hyunwoo took the timeline paper out of Jooheon’s hand and swiftly walked over to search for a new problem. People will think that he loves challenges.
“Wait, wait, Sir Hyunwoo. What are you doing? I think it’s not the right time.”
People were surprised by what they were seeing as Hyunwoo walked faster to reach Kihyun’s room doorway. Even Changkyun and Hyungwon tried to stop him from doing what he was gonna do. If there is a person who could stop Kihyun then Hyunwoo would be the last person on the earth to be the option. That’s what they think. Instead of making the situation calm down, Hyunwoo’s presence there would be a disaster of its own. Yet the man seemed not to care. No one knows his intention to do this.
He knocked hard purposely on the door at the same moment that Kihyun slapped papers on his desk. There was Jiwon who was standing there with his head down and didn’t have the courage to talk. The knock disrupted Kihyun’s attention. His face was red as the anger dominated with frowned eyebrows and short breaths.
“We need to discuss this.” Perhaps Hyunwoo was dauntless. Showing papers in his hand.
“No one’s calling you, Hyunwoo. Do it another time. Back to your room.”
“Who are you, commanding me? I don’t care what is going on here. My job is my priority and this is the priority, and I don’t want you to mess up my plan. Sign this now or I’ll keep talking about this until you agree.” Everybody gasped at the words saying. Kihyun clearly wasn’t in the right mood to discuss something, moreover for a competition. No one could see how the manager looked yet they bet he was nearly on the edge of cursing. None of them dared to take a peek because it was gonna make the tension worse. “Jiwon, please come back to your desk. I need to discuss this with him.”
“Don’t order him. He is part of my team!”
“Do I look like I care?”
Jiwon was in the most enigmatic position but he proceed to walk away in the next minutes because Kihyun said nothing and Hyunwoo moved up his chin to order him to get out asap. It becomes a mystery of why Kihyun was standing still and saying nothing about that after persistently saying Jiwon is part of his team. He was staring intensely at Hyunwoo while breathing fast. Hyunwoo could see how bad it was and he could see Kihyun’s veins pop up due to overflowing frustration.
Hyunwoo warned everyone, “You know what is gonna happen here so don’t dare to open this door and disturb our negotiation unless you are brave enough to challenge yourself. Clear?” Everyone nodded in confusion forced by the situation.
Behind the closed door, everyone was looking at each other. Minhyuk was the one who looked so concerned due to the past memories of the first big fight between the managers. He was one of the witnesses. On the other hand, after putting papers on the desk, Hyunwoo just stood in front of Kihyun who was still having difficulty in breathing. His face frowned deeply. Nothing came out of their mouths for the next few minutes. Just standing face to face without any occasion happening.
It reminded him so much about the past. It was exactly the same scene about how Kihyun was having a hard time with himself. Fighting with himself. Struggling within. Even so, he tried to look okay and authoritative.
Kihyun is known as a perfectionist. Somewhat sounds so promising although it is actually bothering everything.
Kihyun has extraordinary needs with the order, detail, perfectionism, and control over himself and his environment. He always thinks that he is righteous and feels uncomfortable when the situation deviates from what he thought. This often causes conflict within the surroundings. He dedicates himself fully to his works and sometimes crosses the line between what is more important than perfection itself. That’s why he easily gets stressed, frustrated, and anxious. He can’t accept the concept of making mistakes. Even a simple thing like an unclean cereal bowl could make him discomfort. He won’t ever let Hyunwoo go out if he doesn’t look neat and proper. He won’t ever let himself arrive passing the usual time. Perfectionism is an idealism that arises from the ego of needing to give perfection. That’s why he always clashes with Hyunwoo who is the most effective, efficient, and easy-going.
Hyunwoo has always known about it since the beginning they knew each other. Every time things didn’t meet his expectations, Kihyun would get so frustrated. Hyunwoo made a big mistake, too, years ago, when they did a collaboration project with Kihyun. He remembered it so well, it was supposed to be a happy day that at the end of the project, they would go to an office party between two teams for the project’s success and then announce their relationship on the day of their anniversary date. Everybody had given much appreciation for their good work and expected more from them. Nevertheless, Hyunwoo made a mistake right before the final, and Kihyun was mad. Everybody thought there would be a fight between them and then Hyunwoo couldn’t do much about it except play along to protect Kihyun’s pride. That is why their relationship is kept a secret up until now and ended up being an enemy in public. It is beyond a complex situation.
Kihyun was trembling, remembering the past. His breath hitched as his frustration took over his body. Hyunwoo came over only to embrace his smaller body, enveloping him with warmth. Swaying their bodies together slowly like dancing to the moon, to make Kihyun calm down. Unfortunately, It hit him so hard. His relationship with Hyunwoo is a form of a fatal mistake. He couldn’t give perfection to his lover. His relationship with Hyunwoo is both a stress factor and bliss for him. It gives pressure.
“I did it again, don’t I, Hyunwoo?” Kihyun has been realizing that he does everything overboard since then, and Hyunwoo’s presence is the one that makes him realize that perfection is now seeking imperfection. “Why am I like this? Why don’t I do it normally like others?”
Nonetheless, Kihyun is a good man. Though his team members are afraid of his complaints, they respect their leader. Due to his perfectionist side, Kihyun never hesitates to share his knowledge to make other people do better. He teaches and guides his team to be excellent and that’s how people still respect him whenever he makes a ruckus just because of a single mistake. He is truly a great leader yet there are always flaws following his greatness. And his flaws conflict with the other’s situation. He doesn’t want to understand it.
“You did great as usual. One of the reasons I fell in love with you.”
“If I did great, then why are we an enemy now? If only it’s not because of me.” Kihyun keeps blaming himself for what happened but at the same time, he is not ready for what will come if people know about them. Hyunwoo is usually quiet about that because he doesn’t want to touch that unbreakable area if it is not Kihyun who does it first. Their work and personal life are confusing.
“You should forgive yourself, babe. Everything you did is always great, you’re a hard worker, and I’m proud of you but still, you need to remember that you are just a human. Human makes mistakes and it is understandable. There is always a solution for everything. You will be okay.”
Kihyun never listens to other people due to his lack of faith in others. He assumes he would do better than the others. They always do something that contradicts his expectation. He needs to show perfection to others. It is tiring yet he can’t stop. Only with Hyunwoo, the place that he feels comfortable with the most because Hyunwoo never expects something beyond his reach, always praising his doing even for something silly, and always understanding everything although their natures are opposite to each other. He adores Hyunwoo.
He became relaxed under Hyunwoo’s surveillance. The tangled thread has come off. He buried himself deeper in Hyunwoo’s tight embrace. Feeling Hyunwoo’s gentle caress on his head. Being in Hyunwoo’s hug is perfection itself. If only it could last forever.
“I’m sorry, Hyunwoo.”
If there is a person who could stop Kihyun, then it is Hyunwoo. No one ever knows the fact.
Hyunwoo came out of Kihyun’s room bringing papers in his hand. He showed an annoyed face to the crowd who might be trying to eavesdrop on the room when he opened the door. They dissolved as fast as lightning. There was Jooheon waiting, he looked so sweaty due to being over uneasy. “S-so?”
“He’s stubborn as always. I don’t get anything.” Hyunwoo gave back the paper to his underling who was stunned by the fact that there was no sign in the paper and it was gonna be a disaster for his life because Jooheon would try to sacrifice himself the next day to meet Kihyun personally. Hyunwoo returned to his room casually as if nothing happened just now. “Focus on your jobs, guys, or I’ll make you do overtime today.”
A few minutes later, Kihyun came out bringing his meeting book and calling Minhyuk as usual to follow him. He went somewhere and then ordered people to do something to solve the problem. He gathered his team to his room and did some briefings. All of his team members should help to find the mistakes and fix them on the same day. He didn’t look like someone who just going rampage at all. He still looks like the usual perfectionist elite Kihyun and nothing changes. Yet still, the day felt so perplexing. Making them wondering what was happening. The unsolved miracles. Gossip spread too fast.
Hyunwoo was enjoying his coffee in his own room. Playing with Kihyun’s glasses.
“Seems like my date plan today is aborted. Although I prepare everything perfectly. Love is definitely hard for us, huh.”
He took out a small box from his drawer. Its shine blinded eyes but no one would see it. The abandoned dream.
“It failed again.”