Chapter Text
The gates before me felt as tall as skyscrapers. They loomed above me like a guardian spirit warding off tricksters and evil spirits. I stared at them for quite a long time, just trying to stop breathing manually. The early morning air was crisp and cool, perfect for the trainer's suit I had on, and my tied-up hair perfectly swished back and forth with the breeze, as if it was dancing. My heart could barely take the anticipation I was creating for myself with my cowardice!
"<Come on, Tally! You made it all the way here. You passed the tests like everyone else, and you trained your Japanese so hard you forgot some English words!>" I put my hands up onto my head and let out a horrendous gargling sound, like I was imitating my feeling of drowning in anxiety. "Uwaahhh. It's just so nerve-wracking! I'm standing right outside the hallowed gates of Tracen! Bahaaa! I feel like I could run around in circles, but I also feel like I could just drop down like a woooorrrmmm!"
"Would I be interrupting something just now? I'm quite surprised to be the second person at these gates this morning." The voice of a practiced professional woman cut my gargling and worming out, like a legendary blade to paper. I froze up, slowly looking over to a lady in green that was staring at me curiously while I was ruining the hair I spent so hard getting perfect just an hour ago. I immediately lowered my hands and cleared my throat to try and play it off.
"No, no! You're not interrupting anything at all. In fact, being the only one here was making me a bit, errr…"
"Nervous?"
"Ha! Yes, exactly." I tried letting out another laugh, but it didn't quite stick the way I wanted it to. "Good morning. I can only assume you are Tazuna-san. I remember seeing you in a lot of the pictures!" I dug into my trainer suit for a business card and handed it to her gently. Tazuna took it gracefully in her own hands and glanced at it with recognition.
"Now I see! It's you, Tally-san!" Tazuna beamed at me, which made my heart skip for a beat. Not only did she recognize my name, but she was giving such positive attention. Most people who saw me freak out tended to be more cautious. "I've been looking forward to meeting you for the first time. It's quite rare that we have the pleasure of a foreign trainer gracing Tracen's halls!" I see, so in short…I'm about to stick out like a sore thumb. Well, that's not the most uncommon feeling in the world. I'm used to standing out, so here wouldn't be any different.
"I'm quite honored to be given the chance of a lifetime here. I live for Umamusume, and I want nothing more than to help them achieve freedom," I explained softly and politely. Despite my demeanor, in my chest was a fire of passion waiting to be unleashed. "Running free, no matter what. That's what we trainers should inspire in our trainees!" I put my hands on my hips and let out a hearty laugh. If it's my first meeting with someone, I always want to leave a bold first impression! Tazuna seemed to be absorbing my words with the ease of long practice, as if she was accustomed to dealing with people with over the top energy. I imagined it took a lot to actually surprise her in a way that mattered.
"I see. Well, it's your first day today, so why don't you focus on learning the layout of the campus? After lunch has ended, mock races will take place out in the training areas. I highly encourage joining the other trainers to begin your scouting."
I smiled and gave the sagely green secretary a firm nod.
"I plan on being out there the very moment the racers see the turf! You can count on me, Tazuna-san!" I boldly snapped my fingers into a point towards the sky. Striking a sudden pose did finally make Tazuna react lightly, and I laughed before declaring to the sky itself: "I am Tally Thall! And I'm going to make the dreams of any trainee under my care come true!" I heard a soft polite applause coming from the green clad secretary, and I fought to keep the red from my cheeks.
"You certainly have enthusiasm, Tally-san! I'm sure you'll be able to find some wonderful racers to inspire." Tazuna bowed her head respectfully, which I hadn't exactly been expecting. I felt a bit of warmth sneak its way into my face anyway and laughed.
"Ah, man. Well, if you say so, then it must be true," I said, not able to repress the blush any longer. "I can't tell you how excited I am to have this opportunity, so…" I shook my head and took a runner's stance. Then, without warning I pushed off and waved behind me as I started jogging away before my face went completely red. "Watch for my name, Tazuna-san! You're gonna see what freedom looks like soon!" I yelled back behind me. She shouted something else to me, but I had already drowned out her voice with the sound of my running shoes on the pavement.
***
I loved the feeling of the wind in my hair, brushing up against my face as I resisted its push against me. Ever since one special day, I loved the feeling of my feet hitting the ground over and over as my body pushed itself forward. It felt freeing. I chased that feeling to the absolute pinnacle I could achieve, and ended up here in Japan! This was destiny calling my name—no, it was freedom itself calling. No one is more free than Umamusume, so I wanted nothing more than to be surrounded by them at all times!
As I ran around, jogging my way across the campus, I could see some other early morning risers. I waved to everyone I saw, but I didn't stop to introduce myself to anyone. I probably looked a bit odd just jogging with no destination, but I just couldn't stop once I had started! All of a sudden, my heart was fluttering, and my feet just wouldn't stop moving! I was laughing, too! I was running and laughing because I was finally here, after struggling so hard to crawl my way out of my cages. This morning air, this run, this laughter—this was freedom. I wanted to make sure every Umamusume got to feel this happy, this free!
As the sun rose higher and higher into the sky, my stamina finally began to reach its limits. I was somewhere outside in an empty courtyard at this point, and I at least had a vague idea of which direction I had come from. For now, though, a bench was my new temporary home, as I sat and tried to catch what little breath I had left. I pushed my normal human body pretty hard, yet I didn't have a tinge of regret. To run is to be free!
"Baaahaaaaaaa!!" I yelled up at the morning sky. I was supposed to be a good role model or something, but all I could think about was how happy I felt. "Haaaa…well then, guess it's time to make everything feel just right." I looked to my left and right to make sure the courtyard was still empty, and opened my trainer's backpack. In here was everything I needed for any trainer-related occasion, and it also held my most valuable treasures in the world. After shuffling around for them, I pulled out my secret weapons!
"Now, what's more free than feeling just right on a perfect day like this?" In my hands were an artificial white Umamusume tail attached to a belt, and a headband that supported two tall and proud white furred Umamusume ears. With one more glance around, I slowly lowered the ears onto my head and clipped the belt around my hips.
Nothing but instant bliss…
They were a perfect fit, as always, and I loved how much the white ears stood out against my black hair. Now I was in trainer mode. Even if the mock races were still a few hours away, I was ready to analyze this whole campus!
"Brrrrrrrrrrrrr…?"
"Eh?" I turned around toward the noise of some purring animal, to find an Umamusume staring right at me after standing up from a bush. She had orange-cream-colored hair, with a streak of white on the left side of her bangs. A frilly blue ear accessory was fitted around her right ear, and she was staring directly at me with large yellow eyes and a blank-looking smile. We stared at each other for nearly a full minute before I raised my hand to wave at her awkwardly. Did she see me put on my ears and tail? I didn't usually mind people seeing me with these on, but the thought of someone seeing me put them on in the first place sent a primal fear up my spine so powerful I would nearly pass out each time.
Despite my attempt to initiate a greeting, the Umamusume didn't move at all. She just stared at me with the same smile. "Er… hello there. My name is Tally." I took a step towards the statue of an Umamusume, and jumped back immediately as she let out a screech of surprise in return. I nearly joined in on the screaming, but with my professional trainer treasures on, I managed to hold it back long enough to see the girl perform an impressive pirouette, before dashing away from me at top speed. For a moment, I nearly thought she was replaced by an Umamusume-shaped dust cloud…
"W-well, at least that girl seems as free as ever this fine morning!" I shouted to myself. "Anyway, with preparations underway, let us not delay freedom any longer!" I zipped up my backpack, before poorly imitating that odd girl's spinning, and setting off in a jog in whatever direction felt like the way to the training courses. Now that my treasures were firmly in place, running felt even more magical. Just imagining the feeling of a tail behind me and ears flapping in the wind was enough.
Eventually, after needing another stop on a bench to catch my breath, I made it to where all the signs were pointing. The largest area on campus, the place I'd had dreams about since I was a child: the track fields. This large open space represented everything I'd ever wanted in life, true honest freedom. For a trainer like me, I wanted to see this sight everyday, and see everyone running to their hearts' content.
To my delight, the morning had progressed long enough to see some of the early risers become early grinders as well. The tracks were already full of Umamusume running, stretching, and even bunny hopping down the turf and dirt. I knew deep down that I was out of place overlooking the track, that my first day should have been all bureaucracy and orientation, but I didn't care. I had been waiting for this moment for oh so long…
"It's just as beautiful as I imagined. Everyone out there looks so free and happy," Taking my backpack off again, I produced a thick notebook and a pair of binoculars, along with a novelty cleat-themed pen. I knew I should be inside, signing paperwork or something, but I just had to get some scouting done or I'd explode. "<Ahhh, look at them all down there! This is just so perfect! I wonder if I can find someone to train on the first day?>"
"<That is…unlikely…as a stranger is…an oddity…>" A voice was suddenly right next to me. I was now two for two on people sneaking up on me, and this time I flinched to the side. Next to me was another Umamusume with long dark hair and even longer twintails. She had a striking aura to her, with an expression that was nigh unreadable, but exuded a certain intensity that I almost felt scared of. However, my brain caught up quicker than the fear did, and I gasped.
"<Wait! I know those words! Haha! English!>" I snapped my fingers and pointed at her confidently. "<I know another American when I see them! That's just incredible, I hadn't expected to meet someone from home!>" I thrust a hand out to her and smiled. "<The name is Tally Thall! American trainer, ready to help Uma's like yourself find freedom!>" The intense girl didn't answer me right away. In fact, she stared right past my hand with her blue jewel like eyes and towards the grass below us for a solid 5 seconds before speaking up again.
"<Yes. It is a surprise…to see…another person from home…>" This girl spoke slowly but deliberately. I could see it now, the same feeling I had when speaking Japanese. A buffer between understanding and speaking—though it seemed that even in her own language, she chose to slowly make the sentence as efficient as possible. "<May fortune…favor you. Will you be…running today?>"
"<Run? Oh! Oh yeah! Well of course I am! The best way to observe Umamusume is to run alongside them!>" I took not actually getting this strange Uma's name as well as I could and lowered my hand, but as I did, she suddenly reached out for it and shook it firmly. I nearly doubled over in surprise from the sudden yanking of my arm, not ready for the strength of a firm Uma-powered handshake. Thankfully, nothing came loose, but it was obvious I wasn't ready for such a thing, not to mention this stranger had mistook me for an actual Umamusume. I rallied myself well enough by standing back up to my full height and smiling, yet the stranger that nearly changed my life trajectory had a new expression on her face. It was one of surprise, even if her face didn't actually change too much. There was also a bit of confusion leaking out as well.
"<…You are not…Umamusume…I beg for your…forgiveness…>" She bowed deeply, as if it wasn't me who was creating the misunderstanding in the first place. I casually waved a hand in dismissal.
"<No no, I can see where I made the mistake.>" I took my pen and pushed up my headband just a tad so there was a visible gap between the ears and my hair. "<These are my treasures. I never go anywhere without them. I don't like doing my trainer work without them, either.>" I pressed the ears back down and laughed again, though it was a bit more forced than I intended. The Umamusume stared up at my head, and continued to do so even after I had stopped talking. Now that I observed her for a bit, it was clear she was once again trying to find the words to say to me. I just kept smiling and waiting painfully, until she finally sighed, squinting at my ears further.
"<Interesting…>" she said firmly, and tilted her head. "<…This is…new…apologies…I do not have the words…to understand…or…describe the feeling I am having…>" I could tell just from these few minutes together that she was a sincere sort of person. I smiled warmly at her, which seemed to catch her attention a bit.
"<That is very sweet of you. It is ok, to not know how to…say what you are thinking.>" I tried to make my speech a bit easier to understand. "<These make me happy, so I wear them a lot. Especially when doing my training job.>" I motioned towards the tracks and all the different students gathering for early morning practice. "<Are you waiting for your trainer?>"
"<Makes…you happy…I see…>" The Umamusume's face turned to one of deep inner debate, so much so that I thought only half of my words were reaching her at a time. Then her ears flipped to attention, and a look of realization hit her neutral expression. "<Ah…no…I am without a…trainer…I manage myself…>" She pulled out a clipboard from behind her, and turned it over for me to see, revealing a strict regimen that began an hour ago. Right now was the time dedicated to morning rest and breakfast; I guessed she had already eaten, or at least I hoped she had. Everything else was planned down to resting while standing, calorie intake, and even an allotted yawn amount for the evening training. Everything here was just…
"Symboli Kris S. Ah, finally got your name!" I sat up from looking at the perfectly laid out training schedule. I slipped back into Japanese and chuckled. "I wanted to know your name since I saw you, Kris-san." Kris just stared at me with a look that told me my unpredictability was a bit difficult to get a grasp on. I just smiled and continued. "Sorry, I know I'm a bit weird. It was nice getting to know you, Kris-san. If your schedule allows it, would you like to join me to watch the practices?" I motioned towards the tracks and was amused at how quickly Kris followed my arm from the beginning to the end.
"Yes…I have the time…for…<observation>…Tally-san…" Kris quitely confirmed.
"How wonderful," I said sweetly.
The morning was finally underway. Those who treated the morning as the perfect time for training were out on the tracks everywhere you looked. By the time Kris and I had gotten there, scores of Tracen Academy students jogged past us, all offering Kris the politest good morning possible. I remained what I always had been, a sore thumb that absolutely stood out when next to Kris; it seemed her popularity or reputation was far greater than I had expected.
"All of them hold you in high regard. Or, I mean—they respect you, Kris-san."
"…Hm…" Kris S looked at the thronging mass of students. "They respect my…results…as all have before…" That wasn't exactly the response I was expecting. If it were me, the attention would probably send my heart rate into the stratosphere.
"I see. Your results…oh! I see, then you must have a lot of great friends," I said, as we both stopped our stride. At last, we had made it to the observation area of the tracks. Now all we needed to do was find a good place to sit.
"Friends…I am afraid I must…disappoint." Kris stared off towards something even further than the student we both watched go about their days. "They know of I…Kris…yet I have no memory…of their names…" My new companion was quite the oddity herself, though it was comforting to be with someone else who stood out like I did.
"Ha! You're easy to talk to, Kris-san," I said, before opening my notepad. There were so many Umamusume out here that it was hard to keep track of a single one.
"Mmm…easy…?" I heard Kris mumble to herself. I let her be and kept watching all the students out on the fields. All of them were so elegant, powerful, and fast. The chance to be here surrounded by all this talent and potential was one I was immensely grateful for.
"…Tally…"
Not to mention the free apartment near the school. The jogging distance is just perfect!
"Tally-san…"
I hadn't been in this country for more than a week, and already I was feeling like I was home!
"…AH-HEM!" I let out a terrified eep! and leaned back from the sudden loud intrusion into my internal thoughts. It was Kris, who was leaning over and looking a bit more frustrated at me. I just tried to act calm.
"Eh…yes?"
"…Have you…<entrusted>…your bag to someone else?" Kris asked, slowly but firmly.
"My bag? To someone else? What do you…" I reached down for my backpack, which was supposed to be just laying down at my feet, but my hand swiped at nothing but air. I looked down, and the bag that held my entire career in it was suddenly gone. "<Wuh…muh…ma bag!?>" I shouted, standing up and whipping my head around.
"…I see…she had said she…knew you…" Kris said, thinking quietly. A look of regal regret fell upon her face. "You…were spacing out…and I was tricked…"
"That's not the problem right now! Which way did she go!?" I questioned quickly. "That bag has my everything in it!"
"…Tally-san…she is in that direction…" Kris pointed behind me, and I followed her arm to see the same orange-cream-colored Umamusume that I had seen in the courtyard not too long ago, running away with her arms up in the air like a child. She was running towards the tracks, and I could hear her laughing and making that same brrrrrrr sound from before.
"Ah…SHIT!" I dropped my notebook and pen, and took off after her. "SORRY KRIS-SAN IT WAS NICE MEETING YOU I HAVE TO GO!" I shouted as I took off full tilt towards the thief.
The chase was 100% a failure. Despite pushing myself to the limit, by the time I had gotten to the tracks, the Umamusume thief had pivoted and started running towards the school buildings. Embarrassingly, she started running backwards, and was waving at me as I tried to catch up. I had to push myself to the limit just to keep tabs on her general direction. Inevitably, the pursuit was far too much for me to handle, and I ended up leaning up against a wall of a building, heaving my lungs out trying to regain the oxygen I just turned into smoke.
"Wh…where…did…that…girl…go?" I panted. My knees felt like jelly. I loved running, but I definitely pushed way further than I should have. There was…just no way for someone like me to compete with…even someone else so young like that. My stomach gained a pain that I had thought I suppressed nicely for the day. "Yeah…impossible," I repeated out loud. That was fine. Everything was going to be just fine.
"When all else fails, get someone else to help you!" I rallied myself back to normal and snapped my fingers. "Tazuna-san should know what to do." Of course she could help! I heard plenty of things online about her incredible work ethic. I took a few steps forward, before stopping again mid-stride, realizing I had made another crucial oversight: where exactly was I in the school, anyway? My surroundings were wholly unfamiliar now. It was a far way off the easy path from the entrance to the training grounds. "That girl…she led me into the maze of no return! Curses! How could fate be so cruel?!" I let out an agonized gargle, scruffing up my long black hair in frustration. "Haaahh…well, there's no use in despair. The only thing to do is trek onward and find the path ahead to the future!" I said, repeating a mantra I heard from an old show.
After some helpful directions from several friendly students, I managed to scrape together enough directions to find Secretary Hayakawa's office. I stood outside for a second, trying to think of a way to explain that I was robbed by a student. In the end, I knew I was just going to have to sing the truth and hope that she could think of a solution. I knocked on the door with a sigh, resigned to my embarrassing fate.
"Come in!" I heard from the other side of the door. I obliged and entered, immediately trying to look as flustered and confused as possible.
"Eh…heya…Tazuna-san. I kinda ran into a…prob-" My semi-act stopped in its tracks as I saw her. That orange cream Umamusume was sitting right across from Hayakawa and lightly kicking her feet. "Y-YOU!" I said pointing at her. She reacted with a gasp and jumped into a stand on the seat she was in.
"Brrrrrrrrpah!" She said excitedly and holding out her arms like she had done a trick.
"Confusion-chan. You shouldn't stand on chairs, you might fall." Tazuna said softly. "I apologize, Tally-san. But a student had come to me with a random backpack, and…" I stiffed my back up as she paused and finally got a good look at me. My treasures were on full display, and had been the entire time I was walking around. I had more than once been confused for a new student; however, that wasn't nearly as embarrassing as it would have been to be seen just freely carrying them around. "I…Tally-san, are you…?"
"No! No. I'm just me." I flicked the headband off my head and held it carefully. "Just some…affirmation gear I wear when doing my training job." I smiled as I felt my face get a little warmer. Thankfully, I didn't see much judgement or confusion in Hayakawa's expressions, just understanding.
"Oh, I see. That's actually very interesting! I'd love to hear more about it sometime, if you're able." Now I was confused.
"More? I…apologize, I haven't ever had anyone ask to hear more about that." I put the headband back on my head slowly. As I did so, the student, who must be Confusion, jumped off the chair and started digging into my backpack. "Wh-whoa, hey!" I said, trying to stop her, but before I could plead any further, she dug something out and held it above her head like a prize. It was my trainer's license. "Oh, you found my license. Um, c-could I have it back? C-Confusion-chan?" The thief Umamusume then presented the proof of my livelihood to me and continued to give me a smile I couldn't quite understand.
"My, my! Confusion-chan doesn't listen to most trainers so easily!" Tazuna explained with genuine surprise.
"Is that so…I'm kinda getting that impression…" I stated dryly. I grabbed onto the license with care and tugged, but Confusion didn't let go. Instead she held onto it tightly as her tail wagged back and forth behind her. "Er…Confusion. Y-you need to let go. Please?" I asked.
"Br," she said in response. "Brrr. Brrt. Chhhchchhh." Her noises this time sounded different from before. I tried my best to interpret what she wanted from me, but all I could do was tilt my head slightly, prompting a frown.
"Brriiiiiiiiiiii. Briiiiiiiii. Baha!" She thought for a moment, then perked back up, as if someone had flipped a switch. Then…it happened.
I let go of the license and reeled back in horror as Confusion bit down onto it. I heard the plastic crunch as her teeth punched a hole through the corner of my license. She then held it up again, smiled, and pointed at the newly-made hole, then the rest of the license, then herself.
"Wait, are you…" Fear had completely left my body, and I felt an itch on the back of my head.
"Confusion-chan? Do you wish for Tally-san to be your trainer?" Tazuna connected the dots first. When I heard it, I could barely believe it myself. I was so exasperated at the Uma's behavior that my brain couldn't process anything else. On the other hand, when Confusion heard Tazuna say the exact thing she was trying to convey, she let out a loud—
"Beeeyaaaaaa!!!!" She started jumping up and down in excitement. Even as I struggled to process what was going on, I couldn't help but find it cute.
"M-me? But it hasn't even been my first day yet," I explained, feeling my face go red. "<M-miss>, er…Confusion-chan. We barely met an hour ago. Are you absolutely sure?" I bent down to the young girl's height, feeling more than a bit confused. Why did this Umamusume feel this way after just one look?
"Fff…ffff…" Confusion tried making a sound that I hadn't heard yet. "Ffffff…fffff…eeeee…daaaaaa."
"Fee…daaa…" I let the noise roll around in my head, trying to piece together what Confusion really wanted. She looked at me with stars in her eyes. "Free…freedom?" I gasped, and Confusion gasped along with me.
"Brrrrriiiiiiiii!!!" she squealed, spinning like a top.
"You didn’t just watch me put my treasures on. You saw me all the way at the gate!" I exclaimed, standing back up to my full height. "Arrghh! You saw that whole spiel about freedom and followed me the whole way to that courtyard." Confusion nodded vigorously. I watched with a bit of amusement as her tail wagged once more. "Even though you saw me put these on, you still want to be my trainee?"
"Brrrrrrrr…" Confusion let out an annoyed hum and sidled over to me. "Bah!" With that noise, she grabbed my hand with a self-satisfied grin.
"Tally-san, I don't think you're going to get better confirmation than that," Tazuna said with a smirk. I was astonished at this student's confidence in a complete stranger, but she stared up at me with complete faith. I felt my heart skip a beat at Confusion's look of joy. I couldn't even imagine a world where I would refuse her.
"Teh heh heh…" I masked the tears forming on my eyes with a fake smirk. "Well, then, Confusion-chan, if you're ready to form a contract, then who am I to deny destiny its call?" I pointed out the office's window, and Confusion followed my lead. "Look out, racing world! Two beacons of absolute freedom are about to blast their way to the top!" I raised the hand that Confusion was holding. "Confusion-chan and Tally-san!"
"YAAAAAAAHAAAAAA!!!!" Confusion joined my battle cry with her own, and we both filled the quiet office with our passionate roars!
"My, my. I've never seen a new trainer bond so quickly with a trainee before," Tazuna said, impressed. "Especially with Confusion-chan."
"It's destiny! I can hear it upon the winds of freedom itself!" I held back my tears of joy. "How about we go ahead and make it official, Tazuna-san? I'd be honored to have Confusion be my very first Tracen trainee!" I snapped my fingers with a flourish towards Hayakawa and smiled. I felt so happy, and judging from the sounds of purring coming from Confusion, she might be even more excited than me.
"Oh…right at this moment?" Hayakawa asked, tilting her head. "I'm afraid that's not possible."
"…Eh?"
"Tally-san. It's your first day at Tracen Academy. We're still going over most of the new trainer paperwork to get you registered in our systems. I do know you're excited, but we haven't even assigned you an office yet. I do apologize, but give the academy another day or so and we'll be able to make your contract with Confusion-chan official!" Tazuna bowed apologetically. I felt my hype train derail, and watched Confusion's energy plummet off a cliff. Tazuna watched our moods spiral and stood up in a panic. "B-but like I said before, you will be able to make everything official as soon as everything is prepared. That doesn't stop you from going over future plans or bonding in the meantime, though! Why don't you two take the day to get to know one another?" Hayakawa seemed like an expert at dealing with overtly bold personalities like mine, and her suggestion seemed good enough for now. I reached down with my free hand and patted Confusion's head.
"Ah, you're right. Until everything is official, we'll just have to be regular destiny buddies instead of formal ones." Hearing that seemed to cheer Confusion up a bit; her tail was wagging again, and her orange ears flicked back and forth with joy. She was a curious girl, but if she believed in me, then I was prepared to do everything I could to help her achieve the freedom to find her dreams.
"Taaaayaaaa!! Feeeeedaaaaaaa! Feeeeeeedaaaaaa!" Confusion shouted in delight, as she started spinning around again.
"How lovely. You two get along so swimmingly," Hayakawa said warmly. "Perhaps you two could go explore the campus for real this time, and figure out our layout just a bit better?" I felt my face grow red again, and tried to laugh off the shame.
"That'd be great! I'll try not to get so carried away this time. Confusion-chan? You wanna show me all the best spots in Tracen?" I grinned down at my soon-to-be trainee, and she gasped. She grabbed my hand again and started pulling on it to lead me out of the office. Damn, Umamusume were strong no matter how adorable or small! "W-wait wait wait stop! I need my baaaaaaaaaaaaaagggg!!!" I yelled out, but Confusion didn't seem to care.
"I'll make sure you get this back by the end of the day, Tally-san!" I heard Hayakawa shouting behind me as I was dragged down the hall.
It turned out Confusion had a lot of favorite spots on campus to show me. After I was able to convince her to slow down, we ended up traveling all over Tracen. She brought me to the entrance and showed me where she would people-watch. Next was the cafeteria, where she people watched, then the library, where she people-watched, and finally the giant entrance hall, where she…
"Confusion-chan. Uh, do you do anything other than people-watching?" I asked, stopping our stride for a moment. She looked up at me with a puzzled stare, her ears tilted to the side.
"Brrrrr?"
"Oh, like, hmm. Do you have any hobbies outside of training and classes?" Confusion smirked, looking like she had thought of something impressive. She reached into her pocket and pulled out her phone, and showed me a photo. I blinked, trying to comprehend what exactly I was looking at. It was a picture of Confusion, standing proudly with a gold trophy for a competition—judging from what she was holding in her other hand, something involving flying discs?
"Ultimate Frisbee? Trick throws? Disc golf?" Confusion nodded furiously at the last one. "Oh! I never would've guessed that about yo—" I was interrupted as she swiped to another picture, showing her holding a different trophy at a mini-golf course. Before I could get a word out, she swiped to reveal another trophy photo, this time in a mahjong parlor and surrounded by looks of disappointment. "I-is there more?" Confusion lowered her phone and nodded. "Wow, I had no idea you were so talented at so many things! That's incredible, Confusion-chan!" I grinned from ear to ear as I ruffled her hair, making her tail wag softly from side to side. I then bent down to be face-to-face with her. "Then, what about running? You like to do that too, right?"
"Mmmm…mmurrrrr…" Confusion's proud expression soured at the mention of running. Her ears folded, and she held up her phone again for me to see another picture. I winced when I saw it; this one showed her falling face-first on a dirt track, right out of the starting gate.
"Oh…I see," I said, staring at the picture with interest. "You certainly ran well today, even backwards!" Now I had more context for her stride when running away from me. It was quite sloppy; the fact that a human like me could have kept up with her at all had seemed like mockery, but now it looked more like a genuine lack of skill. That's what I was there for, though, right?
"Worry not, my wonderful soon-to-be star trainee!" I snapped my fingers, and pointed up at the sky with my dramatic declaration. "On the wings of freedom, we will achieve all our dreams! I will do everything in my power to make sure you can celebrate a racing victory!"
"Eeeeeeeeyaaaahhhaaaaaa!!!!" Confusion screeched along with me as we screamed our declaration into the sky itself. I could just tell we were going to get along swimmingly…
After a long day of running around campus with Confusion, I was fairly confident about traversing Tracen on my own—at least, as long as I only needed the most obvious places. I was disappointed that I never ran into Kris again, though, and found myself hoping I could see her tomorrow.
Kurchik-
The door to my new apartment unlocked with ease, and I slipped inside. When the door shut, I let out a long sigh. As I finally cut myself off from everything, my whole body started to feel like jelly, and I let out a whine as my legs gave out under me. I fell to the floor with a thud, and my ears bounced off my head and slid away like a hockey puck.
"Ughhh… I used up way too much of my battery today…" I moaned into the floorboards. I barely felt like I could manage enough energy to get back up, let alone make dinner. I just needed some time to feel normal again before trying to do anything else. I just…needed to rest. The mask was off. The Tally Thall that everyone got to see out there was the real deal… but it took 110% of my energy to maintain that boldness and loudness. That energy was what allowed me to be who I truly was back in America. I fought tooth and nail to be myself…and a quiet trans girl doesn't get the attention a loud one does…
My freedom only came about thanks to that 110%, so I hoped I could inspire Confusion to give it her all as well. I swore I'd find that freedom she sought, and be the wind in her sails. That was what all trainers strove for, right? That was all I'd ever wanted, to show the Umamusume out there that felt trapped, that freedom was still possible…
"Freedom…to be…yourself…" I mumbled, as my eyes started to close from the exhaustion. The ticking of my apartment's clock kept the time, like the slow trot of an Umamusume.
CRASH
I was jolted awake by the sound of glass crashing against the floor. I dragged myself off the smooth wooden floor to find the source, to find it came from the now-facedown clock, surrounded by glass shards.
"Aww, I brought this over with me," I said, reaching for the memory of my old home. As soon as I picked it up and flipped it over, though, I was met with a puzzling sight. Instead of the clock face I was expecting, I was greeted by a broken picture frame. Inside the frame, I saw Tracen's tracks at night, filled with glowing golden lights that flitted to and fro. I was suddenly filled with an urge to see the real thing, which turned into a borderline obsession, and soon I felt my body being dragged away from the broken glass and pushed to leave my apartment immediately. The sun had gone down, and I was being guided through the cold night by silver moonlight. I had no idea what exactly was drawing me out here—was it something I needed to see, or something that had to happen? I walked without stopping, even though my legs were in pain from running around so much during the day. They hurt as I passed the dorms, the academy entrance, the main building, the courtyard where I met Confusion, and finally the spot where I met Kris. My legs kept moving, no matter how unbearable the pain was, until I was a few steps away from the main track. Just before I started shambling onto it, I paused to look around, but saw nothing but the dead quiet of night. If I had the will to do it, I might have shivered from how creepy it felt, but my body didn't care.
My body hobbled onto the track, one foot in front of the other. The drag of restless night was overwhelming me, but all I felt was the overwhelming urge to immerse myself in this place. My heart was guiding me along like a puppet with broken strings; all I could do was make simple movements, lest I risk my dance causing me to fall for the final time. Still, everything felt surreal and haunting.
"Why am…I here?" I whispered through a sore throat. Despite the chilly air, my body was starting to heat up as I lowered myself under the railing. The turf under my feet was soft as my body forced its legs further and further along. The smell under the full moon was divine, and I could imagine Umamusume running around the track at full speed. What a horrible experience it was to also imagine myself as one of them…
"I'm supposed to be ok with that…I've come to terms with that…I'm just someone who also likes running…a human that loves to run…being ok with that is…freedom…" I stumbled forward and crawled under the second railing, and into the middle of the track. I only made it a few steps further before having to crash and sit down on the dew-covered grass. What was I doing here? Why was my heart dragging this husk of a person down further into despair? That was when I heard it.
"Laughing…" I whispered, staring out onto the track around me. "Wh-who…is…that?" I saw someone, a racer. The outline of an Umamusume, bathed in golden light. I heard the perfect rhythm of her legs pounding the turf, over and over. She wasn't sprinting, but was running around with her arms up in the air, laughing and giggling the whole time, as if it were a theme park ride. I watched her go the whole way around, spinning to make sure I didn't lose sight of her. She was so fast despite the horrible running posture…she looked so…
"You look so…"
"I look so…"
"So free."
"So free."
The golden light waned, and I could make out a few more things about the Umamusume. Their hair, her hair, was black. She had big white ears and a long flowing white tail, and when she raced around to where I was closest to the rail, time slowed to a crawl. I watched in terror as she turned to look at me. She smiled at me with a face I recognized every morning.
"Doesn't it hurt…to play pretend like this?" she said, before racing away from me and down the track again. She kept laughing, taunting me; no matter how far away she was, her voice sounded like it was directly in my ear. I could feel her coming closer to me again, and I finally noticed how tightly I was gripping onto the railing. Before she had a chance to come back and look at me again, I gritted my teeth and slammed my head down as hard as I could.
Then I woke up in my bed, the ticking of my apartment's clock keeping the time, like the slow trot of an Umamusume.