Actions

Work Header

New Entertainment

Summary:

Lucifer couldn’t get the deer off his mind. No matter what he did. He tried making rubber ducks, they all ended up being Alastor. He tried watching soap operas, and for some damned reason, he could only imagine him and Alastor in the places of the ducks.

Wait a minute…

Oh no.

Notes:

I literally wrote this up while I was at the gym on the treadmill. Not my best work, but it’ll do.

Enjoy!!

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

When Alastor had mentioned he’d found something new to entertain him, Lucifer didn’t realize that meant him.

Alastor was an annoying prick, just like how hell had too much red, so it was pretty obvious. It was starting to get old quickly though. Lucifer knew exactly what got under the deer’s skin to make him fuck off pretty easily. Yet Alastor seemed to make it his goal to pester the king almost every second of every day. He was fed up with it. People were noticing too, they constantly commented about it to Lucifer, asking what their deal was.

They didn’t have any ‘deal,’ they were just casual enemies.

Though, Lucifer was interested in the guy, not that he’d let anyone know that. Alastor was an odd fellow, he noticed all these little things he did that nobody else seemed to pick up on. For instance, his ears would perk up every so slightly when he was actually listening to someone. God, what Lucifer would do to touch those ears-

Anyways…

There was one instance, a few days ago actually, that really had him thinking. Alastor threw a tantrum that morning because Lucifer cooked breakfast instead of him that day.

“You made flavourless circles covered in a toothache of sweets and expect me to eat it?” Alastor laughed.

“Can’t a guy just try to be nice? You cook every morning! We needed a pallet change.” Lucifer was quite proud of his pancakes, thank you very much!

“Besides, we don’t need any of your freaky cannibal shit.” He added with a quick glance at the overly red overlord. Alastor grumbled in response.

“Making a mess in the kitchen is hardly a kind gesture.” Alastor motioned towards the batter-covered counters and floors with his staff.

“Can’t you just snap it away? Jeez, what’s the matter, your powers are lacking?” Lucifer snapped his fingers, and everything was magically cleaned up and put away neatly.

“The only one lacking is you as a father.” Alastor emitted a low radio static.

Lucifer whipped his entire body around, his eyes flickering red in rage.

“Ok! How about we just-“ Charlie tried to step in, but it was far too late.

Lucifer gripped Alastor by the collar of his suit, yanking him down. The deer let out a surprised bleat, and was that… a blush on his face?

“How dare you speak to your king like that!” He didn’t like pulling out the royalty card, but he was far behind pissed. “At least I didn’t waltz around with an angelic wound thinking I could beat anyone I wanted!”

Alastor’s smile tightened, but his eyes looked… Excited? What the hell was this creep’s deal?! The king of hell let out a warning growl, if Alastor wanted to go low, he could most certainly go lower.

“Charlie, I think your dads are about to fuck.” Angel Dust piped up from one of the tables before stuffing a large forkful of pancakes in his mouth.

The two men immediately jumped apart, beyond flustered.

“I wouldn’t tease Alastor if I were you,” Husk warned, but he looked just as amused as his compadre.

“We are not-“ Lucifer blew a gust of hot air out as if he were a tea kettle, his cheeks flushed golden. “Fucking..!”

“I know sexual tension when I see it.” Angel replied smoothly, giving them a wink.

Alastor’s face was redder than his outfit, and the overlord quickly vanished into shadows when all eyes came to him.

The whole ordeal was embarrassing enough, but now every time he and Alastor so much looked at each other, the entire gang would give them these looks. As if they knew something he didn’t. And they didn’t. There was nothing going on between them. Nothing. At. All.

But now Lucifer couldn’t get the deer off his mind. No matter what he did. He tried making rubber ducks, they all ended up being Alastor. He tried watching soap operas, and for some damned reason, he could only imagine him and Alastor in the places of the ducks.

Wait a minute…

Oh no.

Lucifer sighed and knocked on the door to the eerie radio tower on the opposite side of the hotel from his room. This demon was driving him insane, he had to put a stop to this at once. Sinners were truly despicable.

There was no answer.

He knocked again, more aggressively this time, hurting his hand slightly.

Still no answer, ugh.

Lucifer placed his ear against the door, he could hear the faint sound of someone playing a piano.

Ah, that was right, the douche was actually musically inclined. That wasn’t a compliment to be taken lightly either!

Lucifer rolled his eyes and just decided to barge in anyways. It was on Alastor for leaving the door unlocked.

He wasn’t sure what to expect on the other side l, was it certainly wasn’t… this.

It was a cozy little bayou, fireflies were buzzing about, the swap water was low and peaceful, and crickets were chirping almost rhythmically to the piano keys. Lucifer couldn’t help but marvel at the aqua colored water and weeping willow trees.

“It’s quite the pocket dimension, isn’t it, your majesty?” Alastor’s voice nearly made him shit himself. He slowly turned to see the man standing behind him in a pink striped suit, eerily similar to his own shirt beneath his tailcoat.

Lucifer gawked at the other man for a few long moments, heat creeping up the back of his neck. He suddenly felt like a teenager with their first crush.

Crush? Oh god… he is in for it now. A crush on the radio demon? The most anti-touch person he’d ever met.

Before he could even have time to process this new revelation, he was swept away in a slow dance. One hand was on his left shoulder, while the other arm wrapped around his waist. And… wow, he couldn’t remember the last time he’d been touched intimately like this.

“Y-you’re messing with me,” Lucifer stepped in perfect harmony as they danced.

They rotated to the left.

“Trust me, you’d know if I was.” Alastor’s voice was soft.

Swayed to the right.

“What is this then?” Lucifer could feel the hand on his back pull him in closer.

“A simple dance.”

Lucifer pressed his cheek into Alastor’s chest as they rocked back and forth. It was nice for a moment, breathing in the scent of the other man. It was nice before Alastor suddenly jerked him to the side and dipped him down. The king couldn’t help his laugh, a light golden flush dusting his cheeks. Alastor pulled him back up, and was bent over so he was face to face with the king.

“What? Is there something on my face?” Lucifer joked.

Not even a chuckle. Tough crowd.

Alastor was staring intently into his eyes, his smile strained, like he was trying to say something.

“What?” Lucifer was about as dense as you’d think.

“You're an imbecile,” Alastor pulled him in by his collar and planted an inexperienced kiss on his lips.

Lucifer gasped into the kiss, clearly not expecting it.

“Whoa I-“ He backed away a few inches when they broke apart. “I wasn’t- I’m- wow-“

“Prefably before I expire.” Alastor raised an eyebrow.

“You like me?!” Lucifer finally sputtered out.

“Well, if it wasn’t obvious…” Alastor grumbled, pulling away.

“Wait- wait!” Lucifer grabbed his hand. “I like you too. I didn’t know I did, but I do. I don’t think I’ve felt this way about someone since…”

“Since Lilith? My, am I honored.” Alastor’s voice was dripping with sarcasm, he clearly didn’t want to hear about Lucifer’s old partner.

“Are you… jealous?” Lucifer wore a shit-eating grin.

“Preposterous!” Alastor shoved him away.

Lucifer had a good laugh for a minute or two, and then they stood in a comfortable silence.

“So… what now?” Alastor asked, his voice sounded… meek? This was new.

“We could be boyfriends,” Lucifer suggested.

Radio static emitted from the demon.

“Partners.”

“Ok, fine, have it your way.” Lucifer threw his hands up in mock surrender.

“Having it my way means I have you.” The radio filter on his voice sounded less than usual, was that a genuine statement? Aww!

It would be odd having the radio demon by his side, but it wasn’t unwelcome. Lucifer could certainly get used to it.

Shit.

How was he supposed to tell Charlie?

Notes:

Ty for reading! Feedback is welcome!!