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“Kris… thanks for walking me home.”
Kris stares blankly at the closet door that Susie had disappeared into, and they’re not really sure why.
They don’t expect her to come back out and invite them to join her or anything. Realistically, Kris understands why Susie had gone to Castletown on her own—Kris, unlike Susie, has family that will care if they don’t come home.
They might not for long, though, if things continue on the way they have. Asriel is away at college, with no clue about what’s going on in Hometown. Asgore, once separated but still close by, was so invested in the concept of getting Toriel back that his kids fell somewhat by the wayside—and now that he seems to have had a change of heart, he’s been taken, too. Kris doesn’t even want to think about what’s going on between Toriel and the skeleton guy, but if he’s over again tonight, they’re going to get even less sleep than the night before.
Kris turns from the closet, only managing to take a couple steps before they bury their head in their hands.
How did everything turn out so fucked?
All they wanted was to bring Dess back. They were perfectly happy to do what Carol told them to do before other people started to get involved. And now, between Undyne and Asgore being kidnapped, having to lie to Susie’s face, and now getting Noelle involved….
It’s just. Too. Much.
They feel the soul nudge them towards the exit, and for once, they’re glad to let it take the wheel. They don’t want to be here—they don’t want to be anywhere, really, except maybe wherever Dess is.
She would know what to do, Kris thinks as they feel themself move robotically in whatever direction the soul wishes. For once, it doesn’t make them stop and check every obstacle in Hometown, and they’re not sure if they’re grateful for this mercy or not.
They wonder, suddenly, if Dess is somewhere she can come back from. They wonder if she’s well and truly dead and gone, and then they wonder if that changes their opinion on wanting to be where she is.
They don’t think it does.
What happens if she can’t be brought back? What about everything that’s happened—everything Kris has made happen—if it all ends up being for naught? How will they go on, knowing everything they’d done?
They shake their head in an attempt to expel the doubts. No. They’ve come too far to even entertain giving up so close to the finish line.
Kris is fairly certain that the Knight is Dess—or whatever is left of her, in any case. Surely, if she’s able to take form in any capacity, they can bring her back from the brink. Surely she’s not gone forever. Just… different.
Denial is the word of the day, is it?
Kris scowls. They were having a rare moment of companionable silence with the soul, and then it went and ruined it.
I’m just saying, the soul argues, lying to yourself like this is gonna end up hurting you more in the end.
Kris scoffs. It’s not like the soul actually cares about what happens to Kris. They’re enemies, plain and simple.
Regardless of whether or not you believe it, I do genuinely care about you, Kris, it claims, We have different goals in all of this, but that doesn’t mean I wish you ill.
There’s a moment of internal silence as Kris attempts to ignore the soul, hoping that it will shut up and leave them alone.
I’m… sorry about everything that happened with Susie.
No such luck.
Kris doesn’t understand the statement, as nothing had “happened with Susie” that would warrant an apology.
It’s not hard to see how you feel about her. It’s written all over you, Kris. I know that the whole Susie and Noelle thing is upsetting you.
Well, it doesn’t matter, Kris decides, because Susie doesn’t like Kris. Susie doesn’t even know Kris. She likes the way the soul chooses to act and respond through Kris.
You don’t actually believe that, do you? That girl would do anything for you.
They doubt she would if she found out Kris had been trying to work against her this whole time.
The soul doesn’t have a response for that.
They shake off the light hold of the soul’s control, and it lets go willingly as they reach their front door. They listen for a moment outside, but hear no music or conversation within, so they carefully open the door, peeking inside.
Toriel sits in her chair, dead asleep and still holding a book in her hands. Kris attempts to sneak past quickly, but they stop when they notice that she doesn’t have her usual blanket in her lap.
They glance at her for a long moment—she kept them up damn near all night drinking and dancing with the convenience store guy, they don’t owe her any kind gestures right now—but they ultimately sigh softly and pull the blanket off of the couch to drape it over her.
She stirs as they do, blinking heavily lidded eyes open. “Kris…? Welcome home, sweetie. Did you have a nice time with Susie at the festival?”
Kris can’t explain why, but the question very nearly brings tears to their eyes. It was just a stupid festival—one they’ve been to every year for as long as they can remember. It doesn’t matter.
Instead of replying, they simply turn their head away and give a quiet nod.
Toriel is too groggy to notice their inner struggle. She simply yawns and closes her eyes again, snuggling into the blanket Kris gave her.
“You’ll have to tell me all… about it… tomorrow….”
Kris stands beside her chair for a moment longer before they turn to head upstairs to their room. They close the door behind them as they enter, placing a hand over their chest as they prepare to tear the soul out.
Something stops them, though—and it’s not even the soul itself. They simply stand there for a moment, staring at the birdcage they usually keep the thing in at night.
I’m not going to do anything you don’t want to do until you’re ready to get up, you know. I’m not heartless.
Kris almost pulls it out for that shitty joke alone.
That was actually unintended, the soul… laughs? Kris doesn’t know that they’ve ever felt it do that before.
Their hand drops away from their chest, and they kick their shoes off at the foot of the bed. They crawl into bed, and for once, the presence of the soul is almost… comforting.
It’s not family. It’s not Asriel, or their parents, or Dess, or… or Susie. But they’re at least not completely alone.
Tonight, it will have to be enough.