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Tanrak is tired. Tired of hiding, tired of waiting.
He's standing anxiously in this room full of old storage. Barth and him agreed to meet here, like they often do, and the notes they exchange are safe enough to not be seen by anyone. But Tanrak still finds himself nervous, waiting in the middle of the room, fiddling with his clothes.
What if Barth was seen? What if someone else is coming? There's really so many things that could go wrong.
But then the door slowly opens, and Barth walks in with a soft smile on his face. Tanrak feels relief flowing through him.
“You made it.” Tanrak says. He takes one step forward and hugs Barth, breathing in his scent.
“Of course.” Barth says. He wraps his arms around Tanrak's waist.
They stay like that for a little while, in each other's embrace. Barth starts swinging them a bit and it makes Tanrak laugh. Almost like they're dancing. Wouldn't that be something? Dancing together to slow music in a big room filled with people who pay them no mind.
They make their way to the back of the room, sitting down. Tanrak is used to this spot. He's used to all the spots this place has to offer. He hopes Barth is too. He hopes they can keep doing this.
It's a good spot. Quiet.
Bath leans his head on his shoulder and suddenly it feels like it's all worth it after all.
Whenever Barth is this close, Tanrak feels like his whole body is set on fire. It's strange, he didn't expect anyone could have such an effect on him.
“I'm tired.” Barth says softly.
“Me too,” Tanrak replies. “We walked pretty far.”
That's true. Lots of places to hide.
“I meant…” Barth starts. “I'm tired of hiding.”
Oh.
He won't let fear grip him. Not yet.
“Is it still worth it?” Tanrak asks. Are you still happy? He wants to ask. He doesn't dare.
Barth makes a little sound. A small laugh. “Not yet.” He says.
Tanrak plays with Barth's hair. It's not often they get to do this. He leans in closer and presses a kiss to Barth's forehead.
Barth looks up, half lidded eyes looking down at his lips.
“Barth.” Tanrak says. He means it as a warning of sorts. If Barth kisses him, Tanrak won't be able to control himself. If he stops now, maybe they can still hold on a little longer. Tanrak can keep pretending he isn't in love. He can keep lying to himself, knowing he doesn't want anything more than he wants this.
Instead it comes out pleading.
He finds himself leaning in closer and feels Barth's lips press right next to his own. It's short and fleeting. Barth sits up straighter, shuffling a little closer.
“Barth.” Tanrak tries again. He reaches for Barth, pulling him closer. It's impossible. He can't stay away.
It's too much. Feeling Barth this close to him, almost panting as he kisses Tanrak's nose. It's not enough. It will never be. Tanrak is weak for Barth. He's out of control. Barth's hand is on his neck and he's hovering right over Tanrak's lips.
Tanrak grips Barth's hair, letting him come close enough for a proper kiss. It doesn't last long, but it's enough to lose that last bit of control Tanrak had.
Tanrak moves his hand, reaching blindly for Barth's crotch. He can feel Barth whimper ever so softly against his lips. It's addicting. They pull away. Barth is right there, eyes half lidded and breath coming heavy. They're safe here.
Tanrak is the one to initiate the kiss this time. Their lips clash together. It's nothing like before. What follows is something Tanrak can't even put into words. A wet slide, Tanrak bites Barth's bottom lip and Barth makes another little sound, swallowed right by Tanrak. He grabs Barth upper thigh, and it slowly dawns on him they are threading into unfamiliar territory. They break apart and Barth rests their foreheads together.
“Are you sure?” Barth asks.
And really, Tanrak thinks he's never been quite this certain about anything before. The movie won't end for another hour. So they've got time before anyone comes looking for them.
“I want this,” Tanrak replies. It comes out hurried. He can't take his eyes off of Barth's lips so he kisses him again. “I want you.”
“You have me,” Barth says. He presses a kiss on Tanrak’s neck, and his head starts spinning. “I'm right here, I'm not going anywhere.”
“What if…” Tanrak starts.
Barth's ability to read his mind is astonishing, because all he says is. “There's no one here, we are alone.”
It gives Tanrak the courage to grab Barth's shirt and pull him closer. He kisses his lips until he can’t breathe, and then moves towards his neck, kissing and just slightly sucking at the sensitive skin there. Barth can’t seem to keep quiet. His breathing grows more laboured by the second and he makes these little groans every time Tanrak runs his teeth along his neck. Tanrak is just glad he’s not the only one affected by all this.
Barth grabs Tanrak’s waist and pulls him forward. Tanrak throws a leg over Barth’s lap, and Barth pulls him even closer. This is… wow. They’ve never been this close before. Barth wraps his arms around Tanrak’s waist again and hides his face in the crook of his neck. All Tanrak can think about is the feeling of Barth’s cock trapped right below him. God, he’s never felt like this before.
Barth seems very aware of it too. His face is entirely flushed, fingers digging deep in Tanrak’s waist. “Oh fuck.” He groans.
“Yeah,” Tanrak agrees breathlessly. “I know.”
He’s awfully aware of the hardness in his own pants, and he knows that if he were to shift ever so slightly he’d be pressing right against Barth.
Barth is pulling at the hem of Tanrak’s shirt now and that decision is easily made. Tanrak pulls it right off and quickly makes work of Barth’s shirt too.
“Barth.” Tanrak breathes. He’s not sure what he’s asking for. Maybe he just needs Barth to hold on to him a little tighter, make sure he doesn’t leave. Make sure this moment lasts.
Barth has never looked this beautiful before. Cheeks flushed, lips swollen and red, eyes half lidded, looking right at Tanrak’s lips.
Tanrak kisses him again, he can't seem to stop himself from doing so. Everything about Barth is so incredibly enticing. Tanrak can't get enough.
They kiss until Tanrak can't breathe, until he's light headed and hot, tongues fighting for a battle that has already been won long ago.
Barth throws his head back, not being able to control the sounds coming out of his mouth anymore. He groans and whimpers. Tanrak doesn't immediately understand why, but he's suddenly very aware of his own weight now pressing right on Barth's clothed cock.
Barth grips at Tanrak's waist, fingers sure to leave marks.
It's really no longer his brain that Tanrak is using. The way he grinds down his ass on Barth's lap is closer to pure instinct.
He starts kissing down Barth's neck again, leaving sharp and wet kisses down to Barth's collar bones.
Barth's hands grab Tanrak's ass and guides him further. They move together slowly. This is… yeah this is good. Tanrak grinds his hips in slow circles, holding onto Barth's shoulders for dear life.
“Rak,” Barth suddenly says. His fingers are now tugging at the zipper of Tanrak's jeans. “Can I?”
Really, Tanrak hasn't made any decision as quickly as he makes this one. He gets off of Barth and pulls his pants and underwear down in one go. Barth seems starstruck.
He grabs Tanrak and pulls him back onto his lap, immediately connecting their lips again.
When Tanrak feels Barth's fingers wrap around his length, he pulls away and gasps.
“It's okay.” Barth says. He starts slowly moving his hand, feeling it up. He presses his thumb on the leaking head and Tanrak almost loses his balance.
“Barth.” He mewls, resting his chin on Barth's shoulder, trying hard to gather himself.
It doesn't work.
Barth starts stroking Tanrak's cock, spreading his precome along the length.
“Barth.” Tanrak tries again.
“Is it good?” Barth asks, moving a little quicker, squeezing a little harder.
What a stupid question, Tanrak manages to think with his melted brain. This is the best he's ever felt.
“Yeah,” Tanrak chokes out. “So good.”
He can feel the way Barth smiles. He starts massaging Tanrak's waist, right where he knows the other is sensitive.
Tanrak has half the thought that he needs to kiss Barth again, so he lifts himself up and does exactly that. Barth moans against his mouth.
Tanrak knows he won't last long. He's basically shaking by now. He rests their foreheads together, closing his eyes.
Barth is moving confidently now, like he knows what he's doing while Tanrak still has no clue. He's pumping Tanrak's cock, twisting his hand around the head in a way that makes Tanrak see stars.
He wants to tell Barth. He wants to give him some sort of warning. All that comes out of his mouth are whimpers and moans that sound like Barth's name.
It only takes a few more wet strokes until Tanrak's entire body locks up. He makes a pathetic sound before he sees white. When he opens his eyes again he sees Barth absolutely covered in his cum, from his belly button almost up to his chin.
He has this wide smile on his face. Tanrak can't blame him. That was pretty awesome.
He shifts and feels Barth huff a breath.
Right.
“I wanna try this.” Tanrak whispers. He slowly gets off of Barth and sinks down to his knees. Barth looks like he's seen a ghost.
With trembling hands, he traces the shape of Barth's bulge, pressing his hand down until Barth whimpers. He starts slowly unbuttoning Barth's pants before pulling it down, underwear following suit.
Once Barth’s last remaining clothes are off, Tanrak is gripped my sudden nerves. He’s sitting on his knees in between another man’s legs. He suddenly feels so small, so very inexperienced. Barth doesn’t have any more experience than he does, Tanrak knows that. But still, Barth always just seems so very confident. He carries himself so easily. Tanrak has never been able to do that as well. He can’t hide his emotions, they’re always right on his sleeves for everyone to see.
He feels Barth’s hand in his hair and leans into the feeling.
“Guide me,” Tanrak says. “Please.”
He can see the way Barth swallows, feeling the grip on his hair tighten.
Tanrak moves his hands to Barth’s thighs, moving up and closer to his cock little by little. He grabs Barth by the base, feeling the weight in his hand. Having it this close to his face almost makes him drool.
He starts slowly stroking Barth’s length. He’s so hard it must be uncomfortable by now. There’s a drop of precum trickling down the head. Tanrak wants to lick it up, so he leans forward and catches it with his tongue. He can hear Barth’s breath hitch, his thighs tensing.
It doesn’t taste awful, so he continues. He presses his tongue all along the length before he wraps his lips around the head. Barth pulls at his hair and Tanrak breathes out sharply through his nose. His eyes flutter shut, hand moving towards Barth’s on his head. He applies pressure on Barth’s hand and the other gets the idea. He starts pushing Tanrak’s head down, getting him to move his mouth further down his cock.
”Yeah,” Barth exhales. “Like that.”
It gives Tarak the confidence to keep going. He goes as deep as he can, and when he feels like he’ll gag he moves up again. He keeps going, licking around the head, swallowing the salty precum before he takes the entire length again.
Barth starts trembling. Tanrak can feel the thigh he’s balancing on shaking.
”Fuck,” Barth groans. “That feels good.”
This is incredible. Tanrak grows more confident, trying to take him deeper. He pops his mouth off, stroking Barth’s cock with his hand, kissing the skin of his upper thigh in an attempt to catch his breath.
Barth starts stroking his cheek sweetly, saying something Tanrak doesn’t understand.
Tanrak leans in again, now focusing mostly on the tip. He licks around it, pressing his tongue into the slit — and he keeps doing it because the sounds Barth is making are driving him absolutely insane. He works his fingers around the base, licking until his tongue goes numb and even then he keeps going.
Barth tugs at his hair again. When Tanrak looks up he looks absolutely obscene, mouth open, cheeks flushed. His eyes are squeezed shut.
Tanrak keeps going. The only thing on his mind is to make Barth feel good.
Both of Barth's hands move to Tanrak's head.
“Rak,” He starts. He holds Tanrak's head still and gently moves his hips, cock filling more of Tanrak's mouth. “Can I?”
Yeah, that might be the best idea he's ever had, Tanrak thinks.
He attempts a nod, it works more of less because Barth understands.
His hips start moving, slowly at first but quickly picking up the pace. He groans at every thrust. He can't seem to hold back anymore, starting to thrust harder, deeper.
It's when his groans start turning into whines, that Tanrak knows Barth is getting close.
His hips stutter. Tanrak tries his best to stay still. He wants to know what it feels like.
Barth's cock starts pulsing in Tanrak's mouth. He thrusts in deep one last time before he cums. It still comes as a surprise, because Tanrak gags and pulls off, immediately wrapping his fingers around the length to milk everything out. It shoots all over his face.
Barth gathers himself, catching his breath. He pulls Tanrak up gently, cooing at the sight of him.
He grabs a cloth to clean Tanrak's face. Tanrak looks up at him, into Barth's loving eyes. He could cry. He's never loved anyone as much as he loves Barth.
“That was amazing.” Barth smiles. He presses a kiss to Tanrak's nose.
“It was.” Tanrak responds. He's completely exhausted but he can't seem to stop smiling. He connects their lips in another kiss, both grinning.
“You're so beautiful.” Barth breathes.
Tanrak lets himself be pulled close in Barth's embrace.
“Let's stay like this for a while.” Tanrak whispers. He feels barth nod.
They still have time. They can be together a little longer. The movie won't end any time soon. No one will come looking for them.
He thinks about praying. For understanding or forgiveness, he isn't sure. Later, maybe. When they're back in the sleeping halls and everything is back to normal.
That's what Tanrak tells himself as his eyes flutter shut.
He's never been happier. Even when he knows this can't be. For now, there's no harm in pretending for a while.