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Kris’s leg couldn’t stop moving.
Usually, this wasn’t a novel observation. In the day, Kris’s entire body couldn’t stop moving. This way, that way, it moved without their input, their control, for the majority of the daylight hours. As invasive as their relationship with the SOUL was, they’d bitterly become used to it.
Now, however, it was different. It wasn’t daytime, and the SOUL was stowed away in its cage. Yet still, their leg bounced in defiance as they tried to ignore it. There was a lot they were trying to ignore, and very little they managed to.
With their hands on their knees, they leaned forward. Their stomach churned, once, twice, then again, all with nothing inside but a slice of honey toast and sickly sweet festival food.
The festival.
Kris laid back onto their bed, sucking in sharp breath and tensing their arms. The churning pit in their stomach had grown to consume their chest now, making their heart quicken and their lungs stiffen with aching dread. With a sharp jerk, they turned to their side, trying to squeeze the life out of their pillow for stability.
The soft cushion only made them feel worse. In an instant, the pillow was launched across the room.
They had shot up to do that— Bad idea. The sudden motion struck them with a bout of vertigo that sent them tumbling off the edge of the bed.
Kris grit their teeth, trying again to still themselves with pure tension in their muscles. It was no use. It wasn’t their body betraying them, really.
The thoughts couldn’t stop coming. They saw her when they shut their eyes. They heard her voice when they stared into the darkness. They’d traded one master for another, and this one was their own fault.
It was all their own fault.
The tension ceased, as their body went limp. Without the motivation to stay up on their knees, they collapsed against the floor, almost lifeless. The painful thoughts just ran through them, unimpeded, until the very last train arrived at the station. Then, only that thought remained.
Kris trudged ahead, dragging themself to their nightstand. They were surprisingly calm, now, considering the circumstances. Guess when there weren't any more consequences left in their future, there wasn’t much reason to dread what came next.
From their drawer came a small packet they’d stowed away, hidden from prying eyes. Still damp and dirty, but it’d do the deed all the same. Kris took one last look at the rows and rows of warning labels before tearing the top clean off. Inside was a small handful of hard, black seeds.
They sat back on their knees, hunched over the open packet, staring down at the contents within. Their chest thrummed with anticipation, before they raised the packet to their lips.
Down the ha—
Kris’s body convulsed, shock turning into panic as the empty pit in their heart filled with the presence of another. Before they could complete the deed, their right arm betrayed them, and tossed the open packet against the wall.
No!
Kris whipped back, realizing in horror that they’d cast their pillow straight into the cage, freeing the parasite inside. With a lunge, they scrambled for where the packet lay, before convulsing and falling forward.
No!
Their forehead pressed against the floor, sweat pouring onto the carpet as they felt their control recede. Their posture straightened, their sense of touch dulled, while their hand moved to reach their phone—
“No!” In one defiant act, Kris ripped into their chest with their other hand, seizing the SOUL from within. Its control stuttered, and Kris took that moment to sever its connection, tearing it from them. “I'm done playing your games!”
With a pitcher’s aim, they launched the SOUL into the wall, letting it slam against the drywall, chipping the paint. For all the satisfaction that brought them, however, it did little to help the hacking, seizing pain in their chest that followed. Each time they did this, it cut their life shorter and shorter.
But what did that matter to them?
Kris perked up, the sound pulling them from their stupor.
They had thrown the SOUL to where the seeds had been launched and scattered onto the carpet. Right before their eyes, they watched the parasite absorb the seeds, one-by-one. Each one came with a ping of sound.
Unbelievable— The damn thing was absorbing the seeds like bullets in the Dark World, its light convulsing and sputtering with each dose of damage!
Kris lunged for the SOUL, sending it and the seeds scattering.
“Piss off!”
The SOUL skittered across the field, hoovering seeds up as it went. Three more pings.
Just one. Kris just needed one seed— There!
Kris swept up a lone straggler, bringing it to their lips with furious speed. The SOUL, however, was faster.
“Ack—!” In quick succession, the SOUL rammed into Kris’s chest, forcing them to crush the seed and scatter its dust. “Why— Won’t— You—!”
Another heave ripped the parasite out, sending waves of pain through their chest.
“—Stop!” Burning fury overtook Kris as they curled into a hunch and glared down at the SOUL in their grip. “You won’t let me live, and now you won’t even let me die!?”
The soul shuddered in Kris’s grasp, shivering, shaking in response. Kris could almost revel in its suffering, if it weren’t for something else grabbing their attention.
The SOUL was growing warmer, its natural glow intensifying. All at once, blinding light exploded from its surface, forcing Kris to recoil and throw it away. Through their groans of pain, another set of pings rang out.
When the light faded, Kris and the SOUL sat in opposite corners of the room, the former leaning against the wall, heaving in pain, and the latter looking not much better. The SOUL was dim, its red light beating slow and shuddering, not unlike Kris’s breathing.
The room was dark, but Kris could still spot exactly what they needed to see. A single seed remained, sitting in the middle of the room. Both could see it.
Kris had one shot, as they reached for their back.
The starting signal came with a flash of movement, as Kris rocketed their knife towards the SOUL in a surprise attack. In the same motion, they leapt to the seed, seizing it into their grasp.
Finally—!
That was as far as they got, before their body froze, the invader taking control for a third and final time. Kris’s eyes darted up to the knife, embedded into the carpet, unbloodied.
It had gotten better at dodging.
“N-No!” Kris struggled against its control, using a free hand to grip the other, trying to force it down to their mouth. Yet still, the SOUL kept it away. “Please! Please! Please, just let it go!”
They gazed up at the seed held above them, their last out kept just out of reach. Tears welled in their eyes as they cried out.
“Please, just let me go!”
The SOUL paused then, seemingly caught off guard by the sudden display. Still, its control did not waver. Before Kris’s eyes, they watched their own hand crush the very last seed.
Kris froze, staring at the dust falling from their fingers before collapsing all at once.
The SOUL’s control waned, and with this came tears. Shuddering in a pile on the ground, Kris sobbed, their body wracked with the torrent of regret and loathing they had no out from now.
Gritting their teeth, they tore out the SOUL one final time, slamming it against the floor before raising it up. Through wet, furious eyes, they stared down at the parasite.
“Isn’t it enough— that I suffer— in a hell of my own making—!?” They roared through clenched teeth. “I can’t even die to save them the trouble now!?”
Another slam against the floor came, then another, as they tried to extract some pleasure from the act. In the end, it only seemed to hurt their wrist.
Kris raised the SOUL up, ready to rail into it again, before something broke. Their seething anger became pleading despair.
“Just… Just let me go… Please… I don’t want to bother anyone… Anymore…” Kris collapsed into a heap, unable to hold themself up any longer. The SOUL tumbled away, as they curled into a shivering ball.
Kris laid there, unable to find the will or way to move to the bed. They would just have to sleep there tonight, if they could manage sleep at all.
It was so cold…
Time passed in silence, the only sound in Kris’s ear coming from their own racing heart. Their muscles tightened, as they tried to squeeze the aching dread away. All that did was exhaust them further, until they just had to go limp.
Then, they felt something warm.
Kris peeked through their messy, oiled hair, finding a familiar source of light, cutting through the darkness. The SOUL, dim in color, sat at their side, neither trying to sneak closer, nor scurry away. The pair seemed to share a look, before Kris acted, grabbing the SOUL in a flash of movement.
Their arm trembled from exhaustion and anger alike, before the anger drained and the exhaustion remained. They hadn’t the will to be angry anymore. All they could do, was take in whatever warmth they could.
The SOUL did not resist as Kris brought it up to their chest, not plunging it in, just holding it there. It stayed in place, growing toasty and almost… pleasant.
Then, Kris did the unthinkable, and released the SOUL, letting it lay in the spot near their chest. With one final motion, Kris curled their body around the entity, forming its new cage for the night.
The SOUL settled down to rest. Soon after, Kris came to join it.