Chapter Text
Ivan was increasingly miserable as the days went by. Despite his smooth sailing career, his marriage was anything but that. Till loved his lifestyle as a rock star more than anything, if he wasn’t locked away in his studio making music, he was on tour to some random area in the country for ages. Ivan knew what he was getting into when he got involved with the star but it hurt seeing Till lose interest in him over time.
Their house always carried a chill whenever Till disappeared and the only way Ivan could see him was through various posts on social media since communication between the two eventually reduced to nothing.
Ivan was terrified that Till found someone else out there, meeting them in a similar fashion to how the two of them met. Someone else that caught his eye in a random bar. Someone else that he took into his hotel room after a few drinks. Someone that wasn’t Ivan.
Logically, Ivan knew that wouldn’t be the case. Till despised cheaters and so did Ivan, but that couldn’t erase the fact that Till fell out of love with him and dedicated more time to his music and art. Perhaps, the next time Till was going to arrive home, he would be carrying divorce papers with him.
Heartache couldn’t begin to describe the depth of his emotions he felt towards the ordeal, maybe he didn’t express his love enough for the two years they have been married. Maybe it was because he didn’t try to keep Till chained to his side. Maybe he deserved it because he was simply an unlovable person and Till realised it over time.
It reached a two-week mark since he last heard from Till when he got a call.
A call that stated that his husband was in intensive care after getting hit by a drunk driver. At that moment, nothing else mattered to Ivan other than running to Till’s side. It didn’t matter that their marriage was hanging on by a tattered thread, nor did it matter that Till probably didn’t want to see him. Ivan still loved and cared for Till so much that he had to be by his side.
However, he was held back from seeing his husband due to an emergency operation. An attending doctor softly told Ivan that debris from the crash impacted Till’s neck and incurred a head injury so he will have to be surveyed for a while after the operation.
Ivan was offered a tissue and only then did he realise he was crying, devastated about his husband’s suffering. He wanted to see Till as soon as possible but couldn’t, leading him to sitting in one of the hard plastic chairs for a long time, crying to his best friend, Mizi, over the phone about what happened.
Mizi eventually came to the hospital carrying some food, with Sua in tow since they lived nearby. They tried to get Ivan to come home with them, just for the night but he stubbornly refused, choosing to be at Till’s side at the earliest time he could be.
They stayed with him for about two hours until the doctor came back to them, telling them that Till was in the clear now but remained in a coma. After getting approved to do so, Ivan rushed into his husband’s hospital room, his heart breaking at the sight of Till’s neck wrapped in a brace, eye bags heavier than usual and there was even a cut in his ear where he used to have a piercing.
Ivan had never cried more in his life in sorrow as he walked closer to Till, his hand reaching for Till’s where he still wore his wedding band, giving Ivan a brief reprieve knowing that Till showed the world that he was a married man.
He wasn’t allowed to linger for long as visiting hours were over, so Ivan had to cruelly drag himself away from Till and towards his friends with Mizi comforting him on the way back to their place.
Ivan spent a total of three days at Mizi and Sua’s place, though he only stayed to have a place to shower and crash at night, other than that he spent all his time staying beside Till. He worked remotely, barely functioning off of the free WiFi there.
He was in the middle of writing up a report when he heard a change in the ECG that monitored Till’s heart rate. The beeps were quickening and when Ivan looked up, he could see Till’s thin eyebrows twitching in an attempt to scrunch them together.
Ivan instantly set his laptop aside to hover over Till’s side with tears welling in his eyes once again and soon enough Till elicited a low groan of pain as his eyes slowly opened towards the ceiling. He tried to move his head but was restricted by the neck brace. Soon enough, a nurse rushed in to monitor his condition, politely forcing Ivan to step to the side as she ran a few tests on his husband.
It was only after a while when Till managed to shift his focus to the side when he saw Ivan, his eyes widened as his heart rate picked up once again, just after it had settled. He tried to say something but ultimately choked on his words.
“Iv..” It was all Till could muster but his eyes never strayed from Ivan, even as the nurse was talking to him, her words lost to him. A hand that was hooked up to an IV drip reached out towards Ivan shakily, those long and splendid fingers that crafted the most wondrous music seemed to have a one track mind as it edged towards Ivan’s left hand. Weak to his charms, Ivan instantly reached over to carefully grab at his husband’s hand and only then did Till heave a sigh of relief.
Till’s bottom lip quivered moments before tears built up in his reddening eyes, scrunching them up to seemingly try to hide it from Ivan but the entire charade was simply endearing to him. Eventually, the nurse retreated and left the two of them alone but neither of them even noticed her absence as Till was lost in Ivan’s eyes.
He tried to talk more to Ivan, who was waiting to hear anything from him but ultimately caved into remaining silent due to the damage on his throat.
“Stupid, why did you have to get hit? Do you know how worried I was?” Ivan spoke instead, chiding his husband lightly as he sniffed, trying to stop his own tears from leaking. Till squeezed his clasped hand, as if he was trying to apologise and Ivan felt the dam break again.
After he saw Till unconscious for the first time, he refused to cry again to not burden his husband when he’d wake up but with just a faint tremble in Till’s voice, a little press of their hands and non-stop staring broke Ivan’s weak resolve. His body shook from the sobs that erupted from him and it didn’t help that Till’s hand pulled away from him.
Ah… Ivan truly was a useless husband who couldn’t even control himself. The rejection was clear as day to him. But when Ivan continued to scold himself internally, he felt a hand reach up to his face, a thumb pushing at his tear-stained cheeks.
“…Clo..ser.” A soft, broken voice called out. Another arm reached up to cup Ivan’s face, the cold sensation of Till’s hands jolting him. His eyes snapped open to see a small smile crossing his husband’s features, teal eyes crinkling up in the corner as those slim hands caught the tears that flooded his face.
“M’sorry. I’ll stop…” Ivan croaked out since the only one who should be crying between the two of them was Till, the one who actually got hit but instead he was busy comforting him. Truly, Ivan was a terrible husband to Till.
“...Ivan.” Till’s voice was still so soft yet so disparagingly opposed from his usual exuberant tone. Ivan took the opportunity to nuzzle into his hands, thinking that he wouldn’t get another chance to do so after Till became more lucid and not so high off of the anaesthesia that coursed through his system. He sniffled as the tears slowed down with Till holding him close the entire time, only letting go when Ivan let out a smile. Weak arms slumped down as Till tried to communicate with his eyes but Ivan failed to gain any sort of understanding.
“At least you can leave the hospital in a few days and can stay home to recover.” Ivan spoke after calming down, hand reaching for some water to give to Till. He watched as Till’s eyes seemingly lit up at the mention of going home.
The two continued on like this until visiting hours were over, Ivan chattering away to distract himself from crying again and Till smiling up at his husband, though Ivan wasn’t entirely sure why.
When Till entered their house, Ivan watched as his husband's shoulders sank down, unable to tell if it was in relief or disappointment. Maybe he was gearing up to tell Ivan he finally wanted a divorce, but instead Till turned around with a smile on his face, hand stretching out to intertwine with Ivan's limp arm.
Snuggling into Ivan's side, Till dragged him towards their couch, as if he knew it was Ivan's favourite spot in the house to relax. The neat cushions were in disarray as Ivan slowly sat down, watching every move his husband made in confusion. In front of them laid a few miscellaneous items which included a small notepad and pencil, perhaps left there from a time when Till liked to doodle random sketches when they watched a movie together in the past.
Ivan watched as Till flipped to a blank page and scribbled something down.
When do you have to go back to work?
Ivan stared at the note for a long while, thinking this is the only way that the two of them would communicate from now on. Rationally, Ivan knew that Till couldn't use his voice after all the damage the accident did to it but for a split second he thought that Till must no longer want to speak to him anymore after his pathetic display in the hospital.
"I applied to work from home for the whole week when you were hospitalised, so I go back on Monday." Ivan said instead, trying to put a smile on his face before Till frowned a little, lip jutted out just a bit as hands when up to Ivan's cheeks. The touch soft and almost loving until Till's palms pressed into Ivan's cheeks, causing his lips to pucker as he looked at his husband in confusion.
A huff escaped from Till's mouth, soundless laughter coming out in short gasps as his eyes crinkled to a close and Ivan nearly melted at the sight of how cute his husband was. Hands gingerly came up to hold Till's waist to encircle the other into an embrace, the rejection Ivan half-expected never arriving. If anything the silver-haired man settled into his lap with a pleased smile, shifting around so that Ivan's chest was pressed up to Till's back, watching as he grabbed his notepad against to write on it.
So that means I get you all to myself for three days.
The Till before the accident would never act like this, however, Ivan wouldn't dare to reject this new-found attention and affection. Even if it was all a lie.