Work Text:
“Can you switch me that day?” You ask Santos and she fixes you with an interested look over her monitor screen.
You knew better than to ask any work friend a favor while they were charting.
“Does this have anything to do with why you humped and dumped Al-Hashimi?” She tries and you blush.
Word traveled fast in this ER, and lies moved even quicker.
“We never- we haven’t, no!” You stutter hating yourself already.
You sounded guilty. Not able to even blame the testosterone for how your body was responding. The pain in your privates a sort of half boner mixed with uncomfortable gush.
“Damn, you guys didn’t even sleep together?” Javadi adds and you twist to see her interest peaked at the nurses station. Gossip caused even Princess to pause and type slower.
You try not to touch the beard hair on your chin anxiously.
But you were currently a bug under a microscope.
“This is an HR complaint waiting to happen. No, no I’m not sleeping with a senior-“
“Citizen.” Santos giggles and Whittaker pipes up while he ate at the desk.
“Al-Hashimi isn’t that old.”
“Gay boy only said that because hes fucking someone twice as old.” Santos adds so fast you almost forget your own drama.
“You and Robby?” You ask and he doesn’t meet your glance.
Damn you hoped you didn’t look that pathetic.
“It ain’t against the rules to have a sex life kiddo.” Dana walks around you and you are sure you can’t be more embarrassed.
But the blonde’s already gone so you can’t give her any sass in return.
You make tiny fists and try to detangle this mess.
“Dr Al-Hashimi is a great doctor and mentor, it would be inappropriate-“ you say the rehearsed lines.
“Lame.” Santos and Javadi say at the same time and you groan.
“A yes or no is fine, can someone change shifts on Friday or not?”
Mohan and Cassie walk over discussing a patient just in time to chime in with the rest of the doctors;
“Not.” They all say unhelpful.
You let your head thunk onto the wall.
“I’ll remember this when you guys ask me.” You add but turn away before you hear the witty comeback and laughs.
It’s three hours into your shift before you're brought back from the masses coming through the waiting room.
Al-Hashimi has a trauma coming in and you are told by Dana all hands on deck.
So you're on the roof covered and visor on, when you twist to see Baran.
Her lipstick was dark but faded from working a double.
Her curls still bounce over her shoulder, you have about a foot on her.
But she holds herself so confidently that you feel inferior in every way next to her on this rooftop.
“You’ve been avoiding me.” Baran adds and you wish the helicopter would hurt up.
“Not sure if-“ you say too quickly and Baran interjects again.
“Night shift, you put in a request to transfer? What, you think you’re just so adorable I can’t help myself? That I’ll climb you or something?” Baran teases and you actually consider going back down the elevator and checking yourself in.
“I just figured- I mean it could be awkward.” You start up again and Baran scoffs.
“I have been turned down before, and I didn’t do anything outlandish. I think at the age of 40 I’ll be able to hold back. You won’t be corned in a parkinglot or anything.” She jokes again and you hate how charismatic you find the doctor.
“Someone’s turned you down before?” Your voice cracks and Baran actually has the nerve to giggle.
“No, not once I hit puberty. Pretty sure after that boys and girls all fell to my boobs.” Baran adds and you don’t see the lie.
Your eyes fall down to her scrubs and Baran makes a risking noise like ‘gotcha’
“So it’s not the physical connection then.” Baran adds turning back to the helipad.
“What?”
“Well you had me confused at first. I mean you look ready to rub yourself against my leg everytime we are on shift. It’s not the age thing, because I heard you and Dana had a thing four Christmas parties ago.”
Your eyes bulge.
“What?” You blurt out in a screech and Baran just seems tickled.
“Don’t worry, I asked permission first. Never mess with a nurse, but she said it was the best kiss she’d ever had. But she found girls are more her style now.” Baran says and the helicopter starts to whip the air around to make her shout.
Al-Hashimi walks into danger first as you shout after her “MEN AND WOMEN?”
Four hours later you're covered in blood changing out of your scrubs.
You don’t think it’ll take long, you hesitate to walk to the bathroom, figuring you could slip behind a privacy curtain and get the job done.
You’ve dropped your drawers around your ankles when you hear your name being called and Santos yanking the curtain back.
No.
Javadi, McKay, and the new bambi like nurse around her.
You shriek an undignified noise, and the girls all let out a giggle.
McKay stares at the bulge in your cartoon themed boxer briefs. Trying to remember the last time she saw a bulge at all.
While Javadi covers her eyes but then opens them a crack to look down at your tube socks pulled up your calves like some 80s horror movie.
Your hand goes to cover your crotch, imaging even the packer is shy at this. The poor silicone wanting to shrivel in fear.
“GET OUT!” You yell, only for other people to gawk around you.
“Damn, is that you flaccid?" Santos asks and quickly pulls out her phone taking photos.
You yank the curtain and die of mortification.
“Nice undies doctor! What’s your” Santos adds and you wonder if you can go home early from humiliation.
You walk out in the new dark scrubs and try to ignore the whispers and giggles.
You help more patients and by the time night crew comes in your charting ignoring everyone.
Abbot clocks you, eyeing Dana who shakes her head but he confidently strides up to you.
You don’t look at him.
“Hey buddy, I heard you showed off those thick thighs we been workin on.” Jack adds, and you don’t look up. He’d been your gymp buddy everyday for the past year, helping you beef up. Jack said it was great for his mental health, but it felt like he needed a hobby that didn’t involve getting shot.
And you needed someone who believed in you.
“Santos put photos of me in my boxer in the break room like it’s wallpaper.” You add, grumpy as all hell.
Jack bristles, his jaw clenching, he knew - but Santos didn’t.
“That’s fucked-” He’s instantly in your corner and you look at him shaking your face.
But he twists with his backpack and heads for the break room to see sure enough your hairy thighs and bulge.
“He sure likes Garfield, huh?” Ogalvie adds snickering as Baran opens the door to see that yes - the rumors were true.
“What the hell is this?” She shouts circling both Jessie, Ogalvie, and Mohan. Princess is snickering until she sees the look on the senior attendings face.
“He’s a grower and a shower then?” Mohan jokes towards the nurses only to want to swallow her tongue as soon as the room grew cold.
“Who did this?” Al-hashimi’s voice raises and people outside the glass stop to see it.
“Hey! This isn’t funny!” Jack adds opening the door to yell at the floor.
Dana takes off her glasses and you want to be swallowed whole by the desk.
“Someone come forward!” The charge nurse adds but no one moves.
“Take it down, take it down now.” Baran tells icy to the group of people staring.
It’s terrifying and everyone scatters.
You stand up from your spot and walk towards your patient, the ED begins to stir again.
You work two hours over your shift, and the jokes are endless. First they are Garfield related, lasagna and mondays. Then about how those boxers must have meant you ate a lot of pussy.
Then it was basic and dick related.
Meat in the lasagna, sausage in your scrubs and so on and so forth.
The jokes were mostly good natured, and you knew it would die out.
But as you walked by the nurses station you saw the security white board with a drawing of Garfield and a poll for inches.
“Are they, um trying to figure out how bit my dick is?” You twist to ask Perlah who snorts and looks.
“I think it’s up to five hundred, you out of here?” Perlah asked and you turned to her.
“I think so, I’m done charting, just need to check with-” Jack scares you by clamping a hand down on your shoulder.
“Hey, you going home?” He says, not looking through the window at the expo markers.
“I keep hoping this is one of those nightmares and I’ll wake up and it’ll all be over.” You say to him and Jack’s gentle face falls with sadness.
But you push past him, not really feeling like talking much about it anymore.
You clock out and avoid saying goodbye, just heading upstairs to your old jeep. Throwing your bag in the back you clock Baran with her headphones in heading towards you.
She’s not wearing scrubs anymore, her hair is wild and the way the moonlight hits her makes you stare.
Baran must feel your eyes because her eyes meet you and your heart skips a beat.
Her smile is all knowing, kind in ways your soul hasn’t ever witnessed.
You lift your hand up, awkward and unsure you waive.
Baran does you one better, she takes the headphones off and makes her way to your beat up car.
The bumper is gone, and the paint is chipped, and Baran doesn’t pay it a second glance.
You’d assumed she would turn away from things that were different. You’re realizing you assumed a lot about her.
“You okay?’ Baran asks and you realize that no one this shift had taken the time to ask you questions. Once your boxer were the joke of the shift, you’d tried to take it on the chin.
Like just ‘guys being guys’ and you’d shut down so completely that you’d forgotten yourself.
“I’m not big, I mean-my dick isn’t…” You gulp and then look down at your shoes. That wasn’t what you should say to your attending, jesus you were stupid.
“Show me?” Baran asks, it’s so easy that you actually double take.
“What-”
Baran smirks then looks behind her as if to check if anyone could see you two in the dark parking lot.
Placing her fingers against your collarbone she backs you both up to where the car door is still open.
You stumble into your back seat and sort of crawl backwards, Baran climbs into the car with you and you’re sure this is a dream now.
Because she’s pulling your jeans down and seeing those stupid garfield boxers, and then she’s got her fingers on the elastic band and you grab her hand hard.
Baran stops and waits for you, you try to remember that Baran is…Bisexual? Fuck no one prepared you for this shit. How to navigate sexuality and gender.
Baran’s curls fall from her shoulders and she waits.
You drop your hand and hold onto the side of the car behind your head.
“It’s not…I’m not-”
The older woman breaths out softly and you feel like you might shatter if she looks disappointed at you.
But Baran’s fingers are soft for a surgeon, but sure. You should have given her more credit.
The woman was so fucking smart, you have to let go at some point, that was love right?
Baran’s fingers curl under the band, finding how warm your skin was, the top of your pubic hair tickling her knuckles.
“You seem big to me,” Baran tells you and then pushes your cotton shirt up, and leans down to kiss your hairy stomach.
Your lips break open into a smile, no one has kissed your stomach since- god since someone had promised to love you.
Baran’s other hand cupped at the toy in your underwear and you panicked, thinking how she might realize here, now - that it wasn’t real.
That it was too soft, too squishy and- it wasn’t hot and hard, wasn’t real.
Baran didn’t react though, instead she slowly pulled the Garfield boxers down to your knees, letting the toy sit on your pubic mound like it was whipped cream on top.
“Baran-” You gasp, your pussy wet and now in the open air of your car.
The senior attending looked up at you from her dark eyelashes and your mouth went dry.
The last of her lipstick smeared on your stomach as she trailed kisses down, lower, lower.
Oh fuck.
Your hips lifted and Baran’s hot breath made you clench, how could you not?
“You seem pretty big to me baby boy.” She tells you and you moan out, your head thrasing back as you do your best not to hump up.
Baran has her own ideas of what this car romp entails, as the backseat is no place to make love for the first time. But she’s done waiting for you to realize how good you two were together.
The older doctor isn’t waiting, her lips move down your caught off guard at a new kind of wetness.
Your face craning down to see that yes, Baran had spit on your packer. It was dribbling to the sides as she played with the shaft.
Up and down, it wasn’t attached - but your body sure as shit didn’t know that.
You moaned and Barans watched how your mouth fell open and you pant with need.
She’s got your cock in her hand like it’s always been hers.
“Plea-” you pant out and Baran’s other hand reaches down to your thick clit. Testosterone has made it grow, causing pains and erections that made no sense to your psyche or night cycles.
Her fingers wrapped around it just as she did the toy. In unison she pumped you up and down, letting her thumb swirl over the tip.
The tendons in your thighs clench down in pain, your chest rises and falls faster.
“Baran I-” You shiver as your arousal rolls down her fingers and she pinches down harder.
You can’t breathe, your orgasm is so close, and all she’s down is play with your packer and torture your t-dick like it was sa stressball.
“You’re my good boy, aren’t you? Hmm baby? You were wrong, you’re nice and big. And you’re going to behave for me? No more running, you’ll be so good for me. I own this cock don’t I?” Baran tells you, her voice thicker and deeper than before and you’re nodding and whimpering pathetic.
“You’re gonna come home with me big boy? Be mine?” Baran asks you again and you’re practically drooling as her thumb nail teases under your hood and you think you’ve reached a new state of desire.
“Everynight.” You pant back honestly and Baran likes that.
She’s going to teach you so much.
Leaning down Baran licks the underside of your packer and you cry out.
In the parking lot, at the end of the shift, Baran makes you a man in a way no appendage inch could ever. You cum in her mouth and swear that gender euphoria is between Baran’s lips.