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John Dory could feel blue eyes burning into his skin, he avoided the hardened gaze as he kicked a rock with his boot. Laughter in the background as the fire crackled, his focus shifting to keeping it alive. A nudge to his ribs pulled him away from the spinning wheel in his head, he looked at the culprit, Bruce, who was grinning at him.
“Remember the time you tried to build your own pod?” The wild grin reminded John of when they were young trollings. “You declared that you were running away, because you didn’t want another baby in the house.” A deep belly laughs rippling across the circle of brothers.
John Dory gave a halfhearted laugh, shaking his head, his hat shifting crookedly on his head. “I reckon that sounds ‘bout right,” his mouth feeling dry and uncomfortable. “suppose that feelin’ changed.” tipping his head forward and catching his hat, twisting it nervously in his hands.
He could still those steel eyes laser into his skin, he knew which brother wasn’t laughing and joking around the campfire that night.
——
Clay couldn’t help but stare, it still felt surreal to see the eldest in the flesh. John Dory sitting directly across from him at their campfire as his other brothers surrounded them, his mind searching and racing for the last time they were together like this, just a moment of peace between brothers.
He knew what these feelings were that bubbled inside his chest, he had read them over and over again. It was the same feeling that every woman in all the raunchy romance novels he had memorized, but it was the same problem that made those feelings hurt his stomach.
It was forbidden.
But he couldn’t help but yearn to know what that stubble would feel like against his face in a moment of passion or what the cowboy’s sweat would taste like mixed with his natural musk. It’s almost laughable that they could be considered brothers when the attraction was this strong, they didn’t grow up together, hell, he wasn’t there for the break up.
Clay couldn’t help but bite his tongue and force
his face into a neutral position as sky blue orbs met his, but it was only for a second.
———
As the fire begins to dwindle into just glowing ambers, one by one each brother begins to wish their fair wells for a blissful slumber. John Dory kept his focus on the fire, knowing that he was avoiding starting up conversation with the middle child.
Soon enough it was the two, sitting with the star’s blanketing over them. Clay shivers in his sweater, he wasn’t used to how chilly the desert felt at night. Before he could get a chance to walk away without saying anything, the overwhelming smell of leather and tobacco filled his nose as he felt a weight on his shoulders followed by an awkward cough.
“Reckon, ya might be gettin’ colder than a glowfly’s tit.”
Clay stared at John Dory like he had grown a second head, saying nothing as he clutched the jacket a bit tighter around himself. “Thanks.”
They’re left in silence as the last of the ambers darkened and the sounds of the wind up as JD gets up and starts poking his hands in the pit as he checked for any lingering sparks.
Clay yelps as he pulls John Dory’s hands away from the pit, “What the hell, man!” Scolding the eldest. “You can’t just go sticking your hands into fire pits!” Checking for any injuries but only finding callous fingertips, it made his lower parts throb at the idea of them being inside him.
John Dory smiled at the fuss at that was being made over him, he could only shake his head. It was endearing to see that Clay did still care about him, even if he spent a majority of the time glaring holes into his head.
Satisfied with the through inspection, Clay shoves JD’s hands away and crosses his arms. Whether it was to stop the intrusive, filthy thoughts from filling his head or if he just didn’t want John Dory thinking that he cared about him. He huffs at the thoughts that he would even be capable of loving the eldest in the way that was expected between brothers. Finally finding the courage to stand up on his feet, leather jacket wrapped around his slim frame with pride swelling in his chest that he got a certain privilege that his other brothers hadn’t gotten….yet at least.
“I’m going to bed. Try not to stick your hands in anymore fires.” Leaving before the eldest could get another word, just the sounds of a deep chuckle that made his face flush redder than a sunburn.
As Clay found his way back to his room, he laid on the bed still wrapped in the leather jacket. It smelt of JD, it was comforting but it drove him crazy that the smell of his older brother would make his underwear become more sticky and wet. Only contemplating for a moment, he brought the leather to his nose as his other hand dipped into his pants. Hissing as he swiped at his swollen clit, another huff slips past his lips as he allows himself to indulge deeper into his fantasy.
John Dory corners him in the barn, their faces mere centimeters apart. Clay swore he could taste the leftover cigarette on John’s breath, it was intoxicating to breathe each other’s air. “Clayton” it was a growl, it sent shivers down Clay’s spine as he whined in response. A fist in his hair pulled him forward, rough lips moving against his own. As the tearing of his crop top rung loudly in his ears as calloused fingertips began to roll his nipples as lips made their way down to his-
A loud knocking caused Clay to jump, scratching himself in the process as he scrambled to look like he wasn’t just touching himself. Shoving the jacket under his pillow and straightening himself as he cleared his throat, “Come in!” praying to any entity that would be willing to listen to his prayers that it wasn’t John Dory.
A pop of magenta peeked in, Clay sighed in relief it was just Floyd.
“Sorry, I heard you come in and wasn’t sure if you were asleep yet.” smiling shyly standing in the threshold, unsure if he was invited into the room. Clay smiled at the younger, patting a spot on the bed as a silent invitation to sit. “Yeah, I just was settling down.” he lied. “Debating on if there was time for me to read another chapter of my book.” titling towards the western romance sitting on the nightstand.
Floyd just nodded, leaving the siblings in comfortable silence for a few moments. His fingers digging into the sheets, avoiding conversation. It was cute as Clay was rushed back into his childhood, he knew Floyd was always shy when it came to talking about difficult conversations. Floyd had his lip between his teeth and was fiercely gnawing on it, Clay grabbed his hand to ground his younger brother.
“Ok, what’s up, what’s floating around in that big hair of yours?” Clay smiled softly, waiting for the younger to speak.
Floyd lip quivered as he looked up with misty eyes and rosy cheeks. “I’m just worried about you! I hate seeing how much pain you’ve endured and you’re directing it towards John Dory, when he’s actually trying!” it came out in one rushed breath. Clay sucked in a quick breath, this was an unexpected response. He could feel Floyd’s fingers digging into his skin, it was unsettling. Clay just pulled the younger closer into a hug, shushing him quietly, gently rubbing his back. Floyd clung to Clay, digging his fingertips further into his skin.
“Or is it something completely different than pain?” It was barely above a whisper.
Clay froze momentarily, but shook his head and attempted to pull away to scold Floyd but the grip on his hair and skin was fierce.
“I see the yearning in your eyes, the way you stare longingly at our big brother like you’re ready to get on your knees and confess your sins.” hissed Floyd as he continued to press his fingertips harder. “Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me.”
Chills went down Clay’s back, he was fighting the cold sweat from his palms as he allowed himself to be hugged. They said nothing as heavy footsteps were coming closer to the door, neither brother dared to make the next move.
“Clay? Floyd?” a sleepy looking Bruce appeared in the room, rubbing one of his eyes and yawning. “Why are you up?” Scratching his stomach, he could feel Floyd tighten his grip once more then release. Spinning around so quickly, it makes Clay dizzy as he watches the tears come back as if on demand.
“I was checking on Clay! Him and John were tending to the fire and I got worried that he night have..” trailing off with a perfectly placed pout on his lip. Floyd gave Clay another squeeze and whispered, “I won’t tell your secret if you keep mine.” Bruce let out another loud yawn, stretching his arms above his head. Clay could see Floyd’s eyes widened with hunger. Huh.
Bruce smacked his lips loudly and clapped his hands together, putting on his stern dad voice. “C’mon Floyd, you can see that Clay is just fine.” Floyd only offers a pout and stands up from the middle child’s best. “Tomorrow’s our last day here and I want us to all be rested for the adventure JD has planned.”
Bruce walks out of the room without another word, Floyd quickly follows him but not without giving Clay a knowing smile.
Clay watched them quietly shut his door, he doesn’t realize that he’s holding a breathe until his chest aches for air. Collapsing back on his bed as his heart rams against his ribs, terrified that it might jump out of him. Forcing his eyes shut and willed about the throbbing in his pants, he hoped that the night might swallow him whole instead.