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Jiro-nii has been a clingy sleeper for as long as Saburo can remember. He can't say he minds though. It means he never has to worry about getting too lonely, even when he starts to miss spending time with Ichi-nii, who has been gone more and more lately. At least not seeing their older brother means Saburo doesn't have to decide between keeping the secret about Jiro-nii's 'fights' and asking for help…
His brother's face is still bruised from the last few times. Saburo's heart aches as he reaches out to gently trace the edges of a black eye with his finger tips. Jiro-nii has given up on trying to keep Saburo from paying Samejima, but he still seems upset even if he's not getting beat up anymore. Or, beat up as much, since that guy still likes to shove him around a bit before taking the money. It's stupid, that even when they do what he wants, he still-
"Saburo..."
Saburo yanks his hand away, scared that he might've woken his brother, but the eyes in front of him stay firmly shut. Guess he must be sleep talking again. It wouldn't be the first time, but it still kind of freaks Saburo out. The first time it happened, Jiro-nii just kept mumbling get away over and over again, while holding Saburo tightly to his chest. Kind of like how he's holding him now, actually.
Saburo doesn't fight it, just nestles into the embrace and allows their legs to tangle together.
"Love you, love you so much."
Love you too, Jiro-nii-chan. I'm sorry I can't protect you.
"Wanna be with you forever. Love you more than anything."
Those arms hold tight around him, and those legs press closer until there's no part of them that isn't touching. It makes Saburo feel warm despite the thin blanket and ever-present draft of the old orphanage.
"...might love you too much."
Huh? What's that supposed to mean?
Too much love, there's no such thing. Especially between them. Saburo loves Jiro-nii more than anything in the whole wide world, and it still doesn't feel like enough. Saburo puffs out his cheeks, feeling a bit irritated at the idea that his brother thinks he could love him too much.
He tries to hug back, tries to pull him even closer despite them already being as close as they can physically be. I love you, he tries to say without words. I love you so much that I think it's giving me a fever.
Closer. And if such a thing was possible between them, then maybe even too close. It's starting to feel uncomfortable, strange, the tighter Saburo wraps his legs around one of his brother's. But he doesn't want to stop. Doesn't want to have even a centimeter between him and the person he loves the most.
Still, pressing against Jiro-nii's leg is starting to make him feel weird down there. It feels a bit like he needs to pee, even though he's sure he remembered to go before bed. It can't be that. And it feels better than needing to pee, although Saburo couldn't explain why. He wants to keep going, keep rubbing himself against that leg. He's a bit scared of what would happen if he really did end up wetting the bed, but he knows his brother would forgive him, so he's not as scared as he could be. Not scared enough to stop, anyways.
It goes on like that, Saburo pressing against his brother, his only real concern being a desire not to wake the other. He must be tired, between soccer, helping the other orphans, and protecting Saburo. His brother needs the rest. It all sounds exhausting, there's no way he could do what Jiro-nii does.
Jiro-nii's arms squeeze him, and his leg presses against Saburo, causing him to make a weird noise. The pressure, it's so much-
"So good, Saburo. Perfect, so perfect..." His brother mumbles.
He's good. He's perfect, Jiro-nii says so. Being acknowledged by him like that, even if it's just in a dream, makes Saburo feel so very special. Important, even. Because who else could make Jiro-nii happy the way Saburo does?
He whimpers as he feels a wetness grow between his legs. He knows he should get up, should try to clean himself before Jiro-nii wakes up and does it for him, but he feels so unexplainably tired... Not to mention, his brother's arms are still wrapped so tightly around him. Saburo doesn't think he could free himself right now even if he really wanted to.
"Love you... love you..."
"...love you too, Jiro-nii."